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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / TV/Movies / How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) (29337 Views)
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How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by CrazyScientist: 8:36am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Here are 30 things films have led us to believe (Especially Hollywood & Nollywood).Here are few i decided to share for laughs. #1.Large, loft-style apartments in NewYork City are well within the price range of most people—whether they are employed or not. #2.Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don’t worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one. #3.It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts: your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors. #4.When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightlybluish. #5.Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape. #6. All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach the armpit level on a woman, but only to waist level on the man lying beside her. #7.It’s easy for anyone to land a plane, providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down. #8.You’re very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home. #9.Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do. #10.A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds. #11.Word processors never display a cursor on screen but will always say: Enter Password Now. #12.Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments. #13.All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they’re going to go off. #14.A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty. #15. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps. #16. All black cats are evil. #17. Witches and cultists usually dress in black and red. #18. If aliens invade earth, the USA would be their destination and the only place they would destroy. #19. If any insect bites you, you will get a super power from it. #20. Aliens understand English. #21. When under heavy fire, all your enemies suddenly have unsteady hands and you always escape the bullets, but your own accuracy increases exponentially, that you make nothing other than head-shots #22. Even if the car turns over 5times, you always come out fine #23. it takes less than 5 seconds for poison to kill someone #24. every old. Man/woman must cough before dying (especially Olu Jacobs) #25. after planing to kill someone from the beginning of the movie towards the end when you finally have a chance, you decide you want to look them in the eyes before killing #26 The villain always dies at the end of the movie #27. When you hear a weird sound from a dark corner, instead of running, you just have to check what it is #28. all the boys and men in the time when technology had not come to africa always have nice hair cuts and their hair is always well carved like the work of a clipper. #29. In the middle of a thick forest at night and no moon, somehow theres always light reflecting on the bodies of the people that looks like flood light. #30. Your clothes always come out dry even if you escaped from a sinking submarine at the bottom of the ocean. #31. Kissing at the end of a horrific plane crash makes the pain go away and everyone forget it happened. IMPORTANT BONUSES: * Actor No Dey Die! * Only In An Indian Film Will The Teacher Catch A Student With Expo In An Exam And Evrybody Starts Dancing. 194 Likes 20 Shares
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Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Erukumakanaki: 8:43am On Jun 28, 2015 |
In Nollywood you'll see a ghost making a phone call, calling The native Doctor that sent him to describe his/her Killer's house only in Nollywood you'll see Ghost wearing Bathroom slippers In Bollywood. . . After dancing something tragic always happen with the sound "gan gan- gan gan" 19 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Nobody: 8:51am On Jun 28, 2015 |
lmao 1 Like |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Minemrys: 8:55am On Jun 28, 2015 |
CrazyScientist:s0mething i learnt from superman films. Krypt0nite is never scarce but the questi0n is why d0n't criminals use it in metropolis. The joker is a maniac but batman will never kill him. 15 Likes |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by DjAndroid: 8:55am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Home movies na for entertainment naa. 2 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by NicxonXXX(m): 8:57am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Loool. Funny write up 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by dreydee(m): 9:02am On Jun 28, 2015 |
See as people dey look me for church for laughing out loud nice write-up OP ; 6 Likes |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Phikom(m): 9:08am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Not for sale... |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by dayosaurus(m): 10:38am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Goat eating human flesh. . Can't get ERAN IYA OSHOGBO off my mind. Scary shit 7 Likes |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Mayydayy(m): 10:40am On Jun 28, 2015 |
When victims are shot they just die without struggling.which kin bullet dey sap life instantly like that? I need am.i got a list already. 15 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by mrlaw93(m): 10:40am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Is this meant to be funny and i didnt laugh? 4 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by isaco(m): 10:40am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Lozz. So funny. 1 Like |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by natas22: 10:40am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by CountDracula(m): 10:41am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Victim |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by AbuMikey(m): 10:41am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Justicealh3(m): 10:42am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Killingwood. 2 Likes |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Nobody: 10:42am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Lol,no 6 tho 2 Likes |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by sheddo619(m): 10:43am On Jun 28, 2015 |
lol,so funny hw ppl believe in what is been portrayed on t.v 1 Like |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Nobody: 10:44am On Jun 28, 2015 |
LOl... Ejeh benjamin if you see this comment by chance... Am advicing you to stop stealing NL posts okay?? Bacteeriaa Jay4 |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Cyriloha(m): 10:44am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Erukumakanaki:in Nigeria there is this sound paparaa then we start shooting with out sound no shooting will commence oo 4 Likes |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Krisgift(f): 10:45am On Jun 28, 2015 |
A Ghost looks left and right before crossing the road. A Ghost wears different clothes each time it appears. When someone dies an unnatural death, a broom or cane is placed on the grave and the person's ghost uses this material to attack the murders. You've got to love Nollywood. . 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Tenim47(m): 10:45am On Jun 28, 2015 |
dreydee:. .$ . U com tok say na ur grandmama no alow u prosper 5 Likes |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by bjbukzy(m): 10:45am On Jun 28, 2015 |
oro de lo so. 1 Like |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by NaLaugh: 10:46am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by princenation(m): 10:46am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by wunmi590(m): 10:47am On Jun 28, 2015 |
. |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Nobody: 10:47am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by yashedabai(m): 10:48am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Enjoy mtn opera free browsing .... @ http://www.arewamobiles.tk/index.php |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by nairaman66(m): 10:48am On Jun 28, 2015 |
Hilarious!! But true.. 2 Likes |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by Sexytemi(f): 10:48am On Jun 28, 2015 |
LOL esp in India movies, everyone knows what you are singing and dance steps, while Chinese movies makes one believe you can fly from Lagos to Ibadan. 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Nollywood And Hollywood Almost Killed Me! (+PICS) by great664(m): 10:48am On Jun 28, 2015 |
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