skyfullofstars:
Wow, do not ever let ANYONE insult you! No matter whether it's a stranger or somebody very close to you, no matter whether it's a woman or a man, someone old or someone young! Please, stand up for yourself, do not wait for a man to defend you. You are a human being and you should be the one to confront this situation.

My family believe that men are superior to women, whereas I don't. Everytime they make such comments, I begin a discussion, voice my opinion, and shout when necessary. I don't care if they think I'm crazy, i care about defending what I am, a woman, and if creating a bad moment is necessary, i din't mind, i will still voice my opinion, ALWAYS.

Please watch Chimamanda Adichie's talk on feminism.

That's my advice, rather than waiting for your husband to do anything...we need to empower women to show equality.

skyfullofstars:
Wow, do not ever let ANYONE insult you! No matter whether it's a stranger or somebody very close to you, no matter whether it's a woman or a man, someone old or someone young! Please, stand up for yourself, do not wait for a man to defend you. You are a human being and you should be the one to confront this situation.

My family believe that men are superior to women, whereas I don't. Everytime they make such comments, I begin a discussion, voice my opinion, and shout when necessary. I don't care if they think I'm crazy, i care about defending what I am, a woman, and if creating a bad moment is necessary, i din't mind, i will still voice my opinion, ALWAYS.

Please watch Chimamanda Adichie's talk on feminism.

That's my advice, rather than waiting for your husband to do anything...we need to empower women to show equality.

mployer:

Adichies feminism is meant to deceive naive women like you and increase her popularity, while she lives the opposite in reality.
FYI, she is happily married. Likewise Beyounce.
You can't be happily married with [size=40pt]extreme[/size] feminist ideology. You can try it.
Except you have some other plans.

freecocoa:
Might actually be ridiculous but then, things are done differently in nigeria. Your in-laws are to be taken as some sort of demi gods, you literally have to have their approval to have a successful marriage, which is usually defined as the woman tolerating even as much as being hit, so it shouldn't surprise you to see such threads on here.

Where are you from if I may ask?

My family believe that men are superior to women, whereas I don't. Everytime they make such comments, I begin a discussion, voice my opinion, and shout when necessary. I don't care if they think I'm crazy, i care about defending what I am, a woman, and if creating a bad moment is necessary, i din't mind, i will still voice my opinion, ALWAYS.

Richy4:
The husband of your friend is a wise man.

The point is that your friend doesn't know if the guy speak to his parents or brother privately....

He can't just start yelling at his parent in front of you just to impress you. Doing that alone will give you the license to do the same in future. That's the reason why you do not have the guts to do it.

Tell your friend to let him be. He is the definition of a perfect gentle man. His type is not common in Nigeria i presume.

5minsmadness:


Hold on, I don't get you.
Are you in support of the man shouting on his mother or father in front of his wife? Even in developed countries like the US it is considered bad manners to do so.
Secondly, it is not common practice in Nigeria to see in-laws as "demi-gods" or to even tolerate your wife being hit in front of them. Kindly stop being melodramatic.

freecocoa:
Where in my post did you see that her husband should shout on his folks? Did you even read my post?

You are a liar if you say it's not common practice to place in-laws on some sort of pedestal in Nigeria.

Kindly stop being naive and learn comprehension.

freecocoa:
Where in my post did you see that her husband should shout on his folks? Did you even read my post?

You are a liar if you say it's not common practice to place in-laws on some sort of pedestal in Nigeria.

Might actually be ridiculous but then, things are done differently in nigeria. Your in-laws are to be taken as some sort of demi gods, you literally have to have their approval to have a successful marriage, which is usually defined as the woman tolerating even as much as being hit , so it shouldn't surprise you to see such threads on here.

Where are you from if I may ask?

Secondly, it is not common practice in Nigeria to see in-laws as "demi-gods"

Kindly stop being naive and learn comprehension.

iPopAlomo:
imagine what this woman is spewing... you love him less because he's not fighting... most of all these women are just insane... marriage is indeed overrated...

freecocoa:
Might actually be ridiculous but then, things are done differently in nigeria. Your in-laws are to be taken as some sort of demi gods, you literally have to have their approval to have a successful marriage, which is usually defined as the woman tolerating even as much as being hit, so it shouldn't surprise you to see such threads on here.

Where are you from if I may ask?

5minsmadness:

Which is why I said "hold on, I don't get you."
It was a question directed at knowing if you were in support of sky's post or not.



This is what YOU said:


And this was my reply

YOU used the term "demi-gods" which I objected to. If you had originally said in laws are placed in "some sort of pedestal" then that would have been ok.
You also said a successful marriage is usually defined as a woman tolerating even being hit, like its a criteria for a successful marriage in Nigeria WHICH IS MELODRAMATIC AND WRONG. Stop speaking for the populace and speak for yourself!



This was unnecessary. Saying you are melodramatic in no way coincides with this your response. But ladies are usually quick with words and men have no choice but to tolerate as is usual with our society.

skyfullofstars:


Human rights are for everybody...

Or you also agree with the ban on drving for women in Saudi Arabia?

Ok, I seriously give up, I have nothing to do here...

My husband is Nigerian, but I will not change my style

freecocoa:
Slow down to understand my point.

I do agree with you that people should speak up for themselves, we may not have the same approach though.

That post of mine was only letting you in on how things can be around here on matters such as this, which makes it not so ridiculous to see threads like this.

freecocoa:
[s]You can write all these but couldn't tell that "demigods" is a figure of speech? I see.

It will do you a lot of good, should you learn to read between the lines, then again, we all know how it goes on here, if you expect this to turn into men vs women, then you are on a long thing, it is not news that you lots here don't speak the truth on matters involving women. Yes women are expected to tolerate a lot, even as much as being hit, simply means, they should endure if they get hit, I don't see how that translates to every woman is usually hit in her matrimonial home.

How you choose to understand what I wrote is solely on you but what I wrote is pretty clear and straightforward.

What I wrote about you being naive is very on point as you sure acted like it, by feigning ignorance(or maybe you actually are ignorant) on how women are often treated by in-laws, as regards comprehension, you twisted my words which told me you didn't comprehend it in the first place, therefore, I have no regrets.[/s]

5minsmadness:


And here you are explaining the same post to someone else. Be honest, your post was not clear.

5minsmadness:

What I read between the lines here is a proud rant from someone who doesn't want to admit she wasn't clear in her post.

freecocoa:
Call it whatever you like, I couldn't care less.

softysparky:

5minsmadness:

Of course you care, which is why you replied.
I, on the other hand am done with this back-and-forth that you instigated when you could have simply explained yourself.

You re usually more logical than this so I'll take it it's that time of the month again. Perfectly understandable.

Ciao.

sylarsquins:
A friend of mine needs advise on how to take charge of her man and here's her story....

(

yorubadelta:



Your friend is clearly a troublemaker always fighting with her in-laws. In addition to this, she also seeks to dominate her poor husband just because he won't defend her shenanigans?

She needs Jesus and a job.

freecocoa:
Smh, Replying a post don't always mean one cares, especially in the manner I did.

You instigated whatever this is by not knowing how to ask questions, you could have asked whatever you wanted without presenting it to look like I supported shouting on people, by saying it was considered bad manners in the US. You weren't sure what I was saying but was telling me how it's bad manners? Aren't you just full of it, Abegi.

And you are always looking to start something so I'm not surprised, which is why I am this way to you.

No, it's not my period dear.

Adios.

sylarsquins:
You jst tellin him u aint ON means derz sumtyn

sylarsquins:


She got a job maam buh Jesus I don't know and dat aint my biz. Mayb u shud get a job and Jesus too, coz u need em both.

yorubadelta:



Why u so defensive dear? I thought u said this was a friend's situation.. but the way u've fired back makes it seem like it's yours. Calm down aii.. I meant no harm by my statement.

freecocoa:
Huh?

iPopAlomo:

Are we stalking each other now...? . modified...* I don't mind ooO...

softysparky:
It's a free world hun.

iPopAlomo:


Women and pet name calling... no one can take it away from you guys...

softysparky:

Just trying to be nice sweetie

yorubadelta:



Your friend is clearly a troublemaker always fighting with her in-laws. In addition to this, she also seeks to dominate her poor husband just because he won't defend her shenanigans?

She needs Jesus and a job.