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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. (68237 Views)
‘My Wife Is Killing Me With Having Too Many Children, She Bears Them Like Rats’ / I Just Saw My Uncle's Wife In A Guest House / My Husband Is Killing Me Emotionaly, How Do I Deal With Him (2) (3) (4)
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Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by daimlerbenz: 11:38pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
Record all she does without her knowing. Play same to your uncle. Simple. Adamsdelrio: |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by bigerboy200: 11:39pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
Jamean:Nice attitude from u..was in d same situation while serving, didn't c any sense reacting to (or reporting) my uncle's wife odd behaviors,I silently went to rent a ''face me I face u'' room (thank God some houses kuku cheap die for Ibadan..15k per anum).. Had to even lie to my uncle that I was staying with a friend close to my PPA, cos he will be so mad at me if I told him I rented a room..but the question remains '' why is d hostility always coming from d woman'' 14 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Nobody: 11:40pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
I am not sure if I will ever understand the line of thought of most commenters on this thread. I don't care what or who the lady is, be ready to face serious problems with me if you aren't comfortable with my siblings or parents around you. Girlfriend o, fiancee o, wife oo, you can't tolerate my family, we can't be smooth. This (my parents and siblings) were d ones that were always there when d hustle was still on and strong, I became who I am on d back of their unflinching support and prayers and you come around to start forming boss while they came to spend some time in my house?? Impossible! I won't even have u disrespect or act untowardly to my friends, needless say my family. Sorry, but that's just me. 38 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by ziccoit: 11:41pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
@op I think your uncle has a big problem and he is allowing his wife to dig his grave prematurely. Unless you want to tell me this is how she is going to behave if you were one of her relatives. If my wife could not tolerate my relative she shouldn't bother to tolerate me either. She is very important in my life of course but my relatives are important too and must respect that. Just leave your uncle to his foolery. I only pray he doesn't cry in hot tears at the end because he could not tell us he didn't know what his wife was up to in his home. 2 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by ade2291(m): 11:43pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
I am not sure if I will ever understand the line of thought of most of d commenters on this thread. I mean[/quote] That means you are feeling sleepy |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Jamean(f): 11:47pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
bigerboy200: Hehe..the day I will finally leave I can't imagine the story my dad will come to tell him because he'll feel very bad. Na her tribe people with their bad belle dialect full the house. Not all women behave this way though. 1 Like |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Nobody: 11:48pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
ade2291: Oga, Read my post again. No be sleep (Na spacebooking) 1 Like |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by goryorhal(m): 11:50pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
@ OP you sef no sabi face .. Person dey treat/ behave this way to you and you still sit down for there Abi na until the woman pour water for your head bfore you talk to your leg make you waka comot ,when e no b say your mama chase you out .. Wetin you won make I con do ? Follow you go beg make she dey allow you watch TV ? Bro go back to your mama house , even if Na transistor radio dey listen to am .. E better make I dey my house laugh drink garri than dey where I go dey cry chop fried rice and chicken .. Bro go back home .. No place like home .. If you like sit down .. 6 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by oshaosha2014(m): 11:52pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
HungerBAD: Cos husbands are smooth species no strings attached. 1 Like |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Nobody: 11:52pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
You aint working yet, so, asking you to get your own place is absurd. Whenever you are home, keep to your room. If offered food, jejely say "thanks" on some and accept some. Leave her TV for her, her kitchen inclusive (food-wise). Concentrate more on getting a job, however difficult it may seem. This tribulation is only but for a while. 13 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by dokunbam(m): 11:53pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
Adamsdelrio: record the act and show your uncle shikena |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by bomasek(m): 11:53pm On Jul 21, 2015 |
Guy just hang in there and avoid her as much as u can. Same shit my Uncle's wife put me through in a milder way sha when I spent hols with them. Those folks complained about how I wake up late(cousins wake up b4 me),love to eat(reduce my food portion @ a point),don't like chores especially in the kitchen(funny enough her sibling stays with them,wetin I dey go do for kitchen na) and refused to wash my Uncle's clothes(when washing machine dey the house). That was years ago,now husband and wife can't look @me in the eyes cause I'm a little terror in the family. Ya breakthrough go soon land,just chill. 4 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by soonest(f): 12:02am On Jul 22, 2015 |
You were advised not to go there but you didn't listen now see how you are being treated. Men! Men!! Men!!! What women see sitting, you guys can't see even when you climb an Iroko. Op, doo! Either you endure or you move out. 1 Like |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Oceemo(m): 12:02am On Jul 22, 2015 |
Kimoni:the best comment so far I have read @op that's d best thing keep 2 ur room when u at home is it by force 2 watch tv if u want u can do that with ur phone and try 2 make friends around so that u spend more time away from home I guess ur presence bore her, so jst try n avoid her of a truth it is her house oga so whatever she does u shld take it. 4 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by laplace12(m): 12:03am On Jul 22, 2015 |
angelberton: The guy is dumb. He is angry because of ordinary tv. I was denied food and water for 3 months in my cousin's house while hunting for job and nobody heard about it? ...and this mofo is here whining because of tv. 12 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Nobody: 12:04am On Jul 22, 2015 |
Everyone is just blaming the woman. I see things from another perspective based on the experience I had with six in-laws. Four from my side, I mean my own siblings. Whenever they come around I do all the work, I cook, serve them and wash their plates. Fill my water tank myself. If I don't inform them to do something they won't. Three from my hubby. I have no problem with two, of which one is a guy and a graduate. He washes my plates and his, cleans the kitchenette, warm my soup. Clean the visitor's toilet after use. Lay his bed always and fold his cover cloth. Same goes to the girl who lived with me, discipline. Another came and was different, she will sit, eat and also ask me to serve her drink, in fact she asked me to go look for bread for her on the first of January. I don't confront her, I just report her to my husband and he knows what to do. Hmmm, if you are the example of my siblings, your first visit will be the last be you my blood or water. If you be like the other two example who make me feel happy and don't behave like chairman in my house, you are always welcome. Most in-laws behave like chairmen and no woman would like it. I did not read from your post where you said you always assist her with house chores, you sit to watch TV and have the gut to talk back at her? Be disciplined, you are not there to watch movies or stay glued to your best channel. You will forget your goal and purpose when you are comfortable. The other two well behaved I described above never sit to drag remote with me in the living room. most times they tune to their preferred channel when am busy or sleeping. When I join them they ask if I would like to change it. They always want to come around and I don't give them excuses but my siblings I give them 101 reasons why they should not come because they are spoilt kids and I sure will shout on them in no long time when they come. My provisions too will not be excused as they will empty the tin and leave. Don't go visiting with the notion of being a chairman, be loyal and assist in the way you can. One word, create scarcity to increase demand. Stay in your room. To increase your value, help her with some little stuffs. When you leave she will miss you. 34 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Nobody: 12:04am On Jul 22, 2015 |
angelberton:...thank you! Dunno why he's being told fa 1 Like |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by grandstar(m): 12:05am On Jul 22, 2015 |
Adamsdelrio: I will advise you toput up with it. Its simply a tryig period. It will oe day end. In future you'd just laugh over it. Thats life. What would you say of a 10year sent to boarding house and has to cope with hideous bullies. He has to cope for the next 6 years. You are not a 10 year old. Simply take your job hunt seriously and when you get good job and can afford to pack out, do so. Also,try an contribute to the house so you can be seen as an asset and not a liability. Try and clean the house once in a while and always do things for the kids. She may not even want you to leave. Create win win situation. Your husband's wife is just being mean and petty. Pls never go down to her level but hit the higher road. Always be courteous (Col 4:6) and be ready to turn the other chick. This experience will simply build you up. You don't know who you will meet at your new job 1 Like |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Nobody: 12:05am On Jul 22, 2015 |
Dp |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by kpolli(m): 12:08am On Jul 22, 2015 |
Leave that house but before you leave, tell your uncle that though he has been a great host, you didn't come to toggle power with his wife and then tell him everything she did and said.... Then leave him to know who he married |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by lusciouslex: 12:09am On Jul 22, 2015 |
Guy, put her down for 4-5 hours and everything will be history. I've been there before. |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by poseidon12: 12:12am On Jul 22, 2015 |
jayfolarin: Are you married? 4 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by ezwinner: 12:13am On Jul 22, 2015 |
Firstly, I must say that there is no problem without a solution. Like some people rightly pointed out, it's a smooth sail if you are related to the woman but it doesn't make it a dead end. The question you should ask is; "What are her likes and dislikes?" Most times, we are highly insensitive to this owing to the fact that we feel people should tolerate us the way our parents do. Wrong! Some women are natural fastidious and captious; that does not make them evil but for such people assisting in domestic chores could calm them down. At times they read a script of acrimony silently instituted against your family; this might not be easy to overcome but you should engage in good, well channeled conversation with her and give her credit often e.g. I love your meals...uncle is really enjoying. The kitchen looks dirty, I would make out time to mop it tomorrow and I think you deserve a bigger cabinet etc Never make it obvious that you are terrified by her actions rather paint a picture of a bold and composed man, who is in full control of his emotions. TV programs and the rest would not be a problem when you win her over by your sleight commitment. Finally, I wish you a happy stay and don't expect anyone to pity you; be focused always. 7 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by dmuchwells(m): 12:14am On Jul 22, 2015 |
BeeBeeOoh: Haaaaaaahhhaaaa...I fit buy am unless u dash me 1 Like |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Pakingzzz(m): 12:15am On Jul 22, 2015 |
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Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by oshaosha2014(m): 12:16am On Jul 22, 2015 |
laplace12: You need your own shine too? Oya tell us about your experience. |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by oyejideogunjumo: 12:17am On Jul 22, 2015 |
Adamsdelrio:Although you are new in the area but try search for a job on your own in addition to your uncle's efforts even if it is private teaching. This will reduce time spent at home. Try to depend on the family less.You eat just once at home at evening only since you have gone out since morning. With your little income buy small things biro pencil etc for her children and help them on their home works. Spend more time alone reading studying or be alone in your room. Reduce your time spent with her as much as possible.Endure it is for a while. 2 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Imolore122: 12:18am On Jul 22, 2015 |
drake2: My brother am in your shoes now presently ,my uncle who used to be loving and caring has suddenly turned a new leaf...POWER OF A WOMAN.....to the men out there never let a woman change you 8 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Nobody: 12:19am On Jul 22, 2015 |
Op leave that house...There is nothing you can do. These days when there are more news of home wreckage, the only people a married woman can trust in her home are her kids and kids only. Even when you are directly related to her, she'll still treat you as an outcast once she senses that you've overstayed your welcome. By the way, are you the type that will eat and drop the plate without washing it and will just move to the sitting room to spread your legs and watch tv? No one likes to host a relative who isn't 'domesticated'. 3 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by HiGod: 12:20am On Jul 22, 2015 |
angieberry: Jeeez!!!daughter of Jezebel everywhere you go..... Can someone tell this girl to shut her mouth and keep that repulsive advice to herself. Let's turn the table around and see what your response would be. If the husband was the one treating his wife brother like this, I believe that your advice would be different from this. Young man, I have been in this situation before and here was what i did in my little wisdom then. I called my uncle one on one and opened up to him; I told him what usually happened whenever he wasn't at home and begged him to leave his wife out of it by not picking issues with his wife. I begged him to have a chat with his wife on my behalf. He did and my life took a new turn completely after that....... We(wife and myself) later became pals 6 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by aameyah(f): 12:21am On Jul 22, 2015 |
@Op Why did you now embolden the statement "its my house, I can do and undo". Its like you find it painful. Loooooooool Well, let me give you something to think about. An African proverb says an unwanted visitor starts to smell like spoilt fish after 2 days. You are unwanted and have become an irritant. Your own is even better. She doesn't lock you out of the parlour, effectively alienating you in your room after locking up all the food. You better quit that TV watching, get off your bum and start serious job hunting. Welcome to the real world, not the one where youve been spouting theories for the last 4/5 years. By the time you're gone all day, you won't be looked down on...as much. So manage by spending less time and being more helpful as there's no theory that can save you from your uncles angry wife + her trouble. Until you vacate her world. 2 Likes |
Re: My Uncle's Wife Is Killing Me. by Nobody: 12:24am On Jul 22, 2015 |
Adamsdelrio:SHE HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO DO WHAT SHE DID. LEARN TO TOLERATE HER AND LIVE IN PEACE STILL THE RIGHT TIME FOR YOU TO LEAVE THE HOUSE.......... LEARN THE SECRET OF HUMBLENESS 1 Like |
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