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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / When your maid becomes the madam. (80235 Views)
My Madam And Me / "Your Husband Has Been Having Sex With Me" - 13-Year-Old Maid Tells Her Madam / Would You Forgive Your Husband Who Got Your Maid Pregnant? (2) (3) (4)
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Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by Blade21: 7:56am On Aug 13, 2015 |
Toks2008:Yes and Yes its wrong let's look @ it dis way a man is never around nd de maid is a guy who does all de above mentioned and madam starts admiring him is it justifiable? U are just jusstifying. Cheating any man who can sleep. With his hux help can sleep with hi wifes sister sshikena 3 Likes |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by SAMBARRY: 8:06am On Aug 13, 2015 |
Haaa that one is a veeerrrrrryy big deal o ![]() ![]() in Africa The mentality is still 1600 but it starts from you and I. Thank God you said your sons are domesticated.my brothers too are except the last born. No thanks to our mother aka don't touch him o.dont stress him o.his my baby. If you tell him to sweep he will be doing hand like Cray fish Bottom line is if all mothers can think like you the world will be a better place tearoses: 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by Ngokafor(f): 8:54am On Aug 13, 2015 |
SexyStrawberry: ....Shush please!!...what are you even saying??.you are blessing the op yet your assertions about men are actually downright degrading,like they are some kind of unstable being with no self-control whatsoever.. ![]() ..besides why dont you wait till you marry and have kids before blabbing on how you will be a super woman.Except you intend to sit your pretty bum at home waiting for him to provide for every single thing,i can assure you that it is impossible to work,take care of the children and the home and attend to your husbands needs..all alone.Thats how some of you will involve yourselves in tasks and situations you clearly cannot cope with only to start wailing later that you are overwhelmed.. ...@topic,i am not surprised by the op's assertions,no be @Toks2008 again?..ladies really get time for the dude and his upside-down logic about women and relationships...onto the next thread biko. 17 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by Nobody: 9:18am On Aug 13, 2015 |
Should we also stop employing 'mature' male drivers? 9 Likes |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by crackhaus: 9:34am On Aug 13, 2015 |
Lol... I think y'all should just employ whoever you want to employ as long as he/she isn't a child - then deal with the my husband is a saint/my wife is like mother Mary theatrics after that. ![]() 9 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by damiso(f): 11:18am On Aug 13, 2015 |
If you don't employ a mature maid so as not to tempt your husband, are you also going to sack all the female colleagues your husband will most likely have a one to one contact with everyday in the course of working ? Most people spend far more active hours at work than in the house so what is one going to go about that one? Those ones will even look hawt,with Brazilian hair ![]() All these excuses for under age labour.if you want to go the 'helping pay the child's school fees' route there is no law that says they have to serve you as well leave them with their parents while you carry out your 'charitable ' work .If you also want to go down the 'paying for a service ' route just pay an adult a living wage. OP is right on one thing though ,a maid is a human being too and I don't get why they should be seen as sub human just because you employ them? We need to change our mindset on how we treat maids,nannies,drivers,security men and most domestic workers. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by Toks2008(m): 11:36am On Aug 13, 2015 |
Ngokafor: [b]I'm glad that it was a lady that made the comment you responded to. If you are married please do me a favor and save yourself the unneeded rhetorical masturbation. If you are a man just go ahead and ask your wife to employ a sumptuous looking maid and if you are a lady just go ahead and do your hubby that favor of testing his morality and employ a sweet looking maid that will take over the key responsibilities of a wife and wait for a year or two before making comments here. Yes its toks again and trust me, all my articles are very factual,realistic and unbiased and as i have reiterated many times that those who juxtapose my write ups with my personal life can as well believe that actors and actresses lifestyle is exactly the role they play in movies. I am a prolific writer with a no holds bar mindset and whatever i write is MY OWN OPINION and contrary opinions should be expressed without any form of grudge or sentimentality towards any other opinion.That is the true text of intelligence.[/b] 19 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by marbee(f): 11:40am On Aug 13, 2015 |
Mumu thread! This family section is gradually turning into a joke section ![]() Imagine someone portraying men as childish, weak,senseless;that cannot control himself once he is not given attention. In short, with this your thread men are the weaker being with fish brain. At Op, don't quote the bible upside down abeg,so if is your wife's siblings or even your daughter doing all those things you listed, you will pounce on her abi? Or because she is a helpless maid now,you must sleep with her, because you are visual being .This your thinking no make sense at all. ![]() 17 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by Toks2008(m): 11:51am On Aug 13, 2015 |
Blade21: Of-course we have seen countless madams sleeping with male servants or maids,drivers.cook.gateman and even oga mechanic so its not gender specific. However we all know except we want to pretend that its a cruel world of men where men do stuffs like philandering and get a pass mark for it while a lady does same and is ridiculed big time. So trying to reverse the case is not the point here and any woman who see it as a good thing to sleep with the aforementioned should have a swell time but my point in this write up does not stop at just employing a lady house-help but transferring your wify duties to her. Imagine me eating a sumptuous meal from a maid regularly and enjoying,apparently the way to a man's heart remains through his stomach 2 Likes |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by Toks2008(m): 11:52am On Aug 13, 2015 |
marbee: Please read carefully again and stop making bias comments. Learn to read and comprehend. 4 Likes |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by marbee(f): 12:35pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
Toks2008: I've read all what you are saying, so you will approach a helpless maid for se.x because she cooks delicious food?so when you impregnate her or she leaves you will also continue with d next maid abi? Some maid will only agree because they are scared and helpless.You are thereby preying on the poor and needy which is wrong. Stop giving reasons for cheating or adultery Or do you prefer the wife sits at home and not work because you want to be attended to like a child? 15 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by LaRoyalHighness(f): 12:35pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
Exactly.... Imagine the nonsense. Mindfulness: 2 Likes |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by Toks2008(m): 12:39pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
marbee: All these sermons does not change the fact that a wife who allows a maid take over her kitchen should not cry foul if she takes over her bedroom. 9 Likes |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by Ngokafor(f): 12:42pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
Toks2008: ..Mr man what does being a prolific writer has to do with anything?the thing is stop propagating falsehood and giving silly excuses for adultery. ...This country is already riddled with stories of rape,molestation of female adults and minors alike by your gender..it is getting really worrisome,embarassing and pathetic.Your lame excuses on why men mis-behave is why these bad behaviour are increasingly more common.. ..Instead of dissipating energy on women lecturing them on how to pamper,baby and nurse an out-of -control men whom your kind encourage...educate your fellow males on the virtues of self-control as ordained by God and man..Our morally-bankrupt soceity will be better for it. ..Gooday. 24 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by Toks2008(m): 12:48pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
SexyStrawberry: Im surprised that haters of truth have not accused you that you are a man faking to be a woman. Sometimes when i write deep articles like this im usually tempted to tag it for only married people and not people with little or no experience to just come in and start cursing and making mockery of themselves. When i write im always careful never to generalize but because some people can noy comprehend that the word..MOST..means there are few ezxeptions,they will start rewriting exactly what i wrote thinking they are making sense. 6 Likes |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by Toks2008(m): 12:57pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
Ngokafor: I really enjoyed your super story. I repeat..a woman who allows a maid takes over her kichen should be ready to also give up her bedroom for her.Shikena 4 Likes |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by SexyStrawberry(f): 1:27pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
Toks2008: U know, I don't really care what they think of me here, when I see the truth, I would stand with it no matter what, most times I just read n stop myself from commenting cox its like when I comment, I see myself telling a 1yr old that there is chewing gum inside that stick of lollipop and she doubts and give me reasons why I don't know what I am saying or tell me that I am just blabbing. If u understand what I mean, that's how it is when u comment on Nairaland, that's y most times I stick to the fun sides of the forum. The ladies can say all they want, everyone is entitled to their own opinion, they can't shove their opinion down my throat just as I can't shove mine down their throats as well. OP, next time try to post things that aren't that serious, matured minds are not really much here. I am a woman, I had a mother who thought me to be a woman, we are 7 in my family, my mother never employed a house help, I have siblings who are twins, yet my mother never employed a house help, she did well in her family, and when it came to financial burden, my mother provided for her family more than my dad ever did, unfortunately I am not from a rich home, I am not ashamed to say it, not everyone are born lucky to come out from a wealthy family, werrin my papa been dey work sef? So my dear ladies who are saying I am blabbing till I get married, even if I am not married, I can learn from my mother how to be independent and hard working. Thank you. 15 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by Toks2008(m): 2:14pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
SexyStrawberry: Hmmm honestly im short of words... this is one of the most reasonable and mature posts i have ever read on nairaland. Unleess Seun introduces age sections on nairaland we just have to cope with different age groups and their idiosyncracies. 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by cococandy(f): 2:24pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
If you pay the mother or father for the child to work for you, it is still child labor. Regardless of whether you hit them or not. Child labor is using kids to make money. It is different from just taking a ward that you want to look after not because you want the child to work for you. There must be no agreement that the child will work for you in any way. The child should be like yours. No money should exchange hands. And no chores beyond her age as you would give your own child should be given to the child. The primary aim in that is to take the child under your care. Whereas in child labor the primary aim is for the child to come and work for you. Even if you treat them well, it is still child labor as he or she is there to work for you. SAMBARRY: |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by cococandy(f): 2:33pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
Omo that peculiar society needs to do something about itself. Exploiting kids won't solve their problems. SAMBARRY: |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by SAMBARRY: 2:39pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
Nor be say they force the child or say you must work here whether you like it or not. Them no drag the child by force. The parents and the person will ask him or her. Do you want to work for me. They will break it down the way the child will understand. Eg if you work for me I'll pay your mummy and daddy and they will be able to help you pay your school fees immediately you leave my house. You will basically let the child know the terms and conditions so if she says yes I will follow you fine but if she says no and you still drag her and bundle her into the car because you see she's small and helpless then that's wickedness if you take care of her the way you should I don't see anything wrong however WITH HER CONSCENT not with coercion or threats cococandy: |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by SAMBARRY: 2:51pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
cococandy:it is exploitation when you exchange kids to use to settle their parents debts and then turn the child into a slave it is when you don't treat the child well and pay for his services. My mom had a house help who agreed to stay with us when we were young but she didn't dehumanise her . The parents often come to check on her to see whether ory not my mom was treating her well another form of child exploitation is deceiving children with the knowledge of the parents and then you carry them into lagos and force them into prostitution. You put them in a small room, lock the door and be collecting money from men before you allow them sleep with 10year olds and then use the money to raise your own kids. Those are what I know as child exploitation IN MY OWN DICTIONARY. Why should a child that is not yours come and live with you? For what. If he comes he will wash pots taya and his parents might not be aware. His hosts are likely to abuse him. |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by cococandy(f): 2:58pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
But that's the thing. Can a minor legally give consent? You think if their parents want to send them and they don't want to go, they have a will to say no to the parents and they will do as they say. They will mostly agree to whatever their parents say regardless of how they feel about it. That's why a child's consent is void. They mostly give consent even if they don't want to because an influential adult in their life is asking something of them. And what kind of chores will a minor do that's supposed to relieve the household of stress anyway? Cook? Na thirteen yr old wan cook the delicious meals to feed the whole family? I wonder how it will taste. Or do all the laundry? I couldn't even do that myself I won't lie. Much less a child. Or send them to fetch water with heavy jerry cans on their head straining their fragile necks. (My mommy calls it reducing children's height ![]() a 14-15 yr old can babysit properly but that's just about it. Or sweep the house and do dishes. Minors are still on their formative yrs. taking one under your roof is like adding a child to the number you already have. It's not supposed to relieve the family of work stress. If it does, that means the child is being given more that his fair share of chores. SAMBARRY: 2 Likes |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by cococandy(f): 3:00pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
Let's agree to disagree kulyie. But pls if you know anyone whose done anything like what you typed there, pls call the cops on them immediately. That one pass exploitation. It's downright evil beyond words. SAMBARRY: |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by SAMBARRY: 3:20pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
The only thing he'll do is just sweep, and wash the dishes, run little little errands like collecting clothes from the dry cleaners and emptying the bin if I cook all the soups down his own is to warm it before I come now that is not too much for a 12 year old to do.haba cococandy: |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by crackhaus: 3:22pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
SexyStrawberry: ![]() Believe me, a whole lot of these young women here have almost the same story as yours regarding their upbringing - but trust NL, the foremost site for users who thrive on make-believe... they want to come off as people born into families of privilege where they had 10 house helps growing up, when in actual fact they had mothers who worked, raised kids, and kept the home-front without employing any maid nor bitching about having to do too much chores. Folks from less-than-average backgrounds want to come here and act like Nigerian women only just started working long hours and still managing their home in this decade. ![]() ![]() Love your piece. 16 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by SAMBARRY: 3:29pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
cococandy:there were people who used to do that as a thriving business till naptip got wind of it and arrested All those involved and in any case that's what nigerian child traffickers do.deceive the parents of the child carry the child to lagos and force them into prostitution and then give their parents fake non existent address so they can't easily trace them and then the kids are forever lost in lagos with no one to help or anyone to run to because everyone around them are strangers however reporting them to police will not make any difference because if you call the police and they get this child traffickers arrested, some of their people will still come and settle the police officers with money and then release these criminals and before you know it they've swept the matter under the carpet. That's why people don't report even when you are trying to probe they will say which one be ya own. Your pikin dey among |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by SAMBARRY: 3:49pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
1 Like 1 Share |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by SAMBARRY: 3:52pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
Toks2008:yet you say that your little member down there doesn't work as your brain ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by zeb04(f): 3:55pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
this is the most senseless thread I have ever had the misfortune to come across in years. I guess those women in the office should be sacked because the work with men with no self control. how did your brain get so fvcked up 15 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by SAMBARRY: 3:57pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() damiso: |
Re: When your maid becomes the madam. by SAMBARRY: 3:57pm On Aug 13, 2015 |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() zeb04: 1 Like |
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