Marriage is a beautiful institution ordained by God. It was not man's idea. It was not created by man. Rather, the all knowing God, in kindness, made man and woman and joined them together as husband and wife. Due to it's beautiful nature and basis on which the institution is premised ( Especially when a man or woman found his or her soulmate, then it becomes an Heaven on on earth, Particularly in problem filled Naija. lolz).

Many young guys and girls dream about it, they witness beautiful marriage ceremonies of uncles and cousins, Nikkah solemnization of aunties and acquaintances and can't but wish themselves same good thing.

While Men's marriageable age seems not to bring any fuss, the women folks are not so lucky. May be God himself knows about it when he gives the women what is called "the biological clock" that is thinking away with time".

The concept or term called "Menopause" has not stopped to generate so much medical fear, as modern science via fertility keeps telling us women ability to conceive reduces as age goes up, thus by 35, women ability to conceive becomes relatively slim. Who does not want a baby of her's?? Almost no one.
Two (2) problems that have noticed to always stand against women's marriage and directs them uncontrollably are (i) The girl's themselves and (ii) The Parents

(I) The first one is the girl herself, many girls have set a certain "Age" for marriage as if their life is own by them. At 18, they feel there is so much to enjoy in life than being tie down by a man and producing babies. The look at their friends and use to judge, forgetting that it's all man for himself, a reason why they send away intending suitors that comes when they are still "hot and pecky".

Many are carried away by the "campus" fun fare, the fairy tale of an handsome, gorgeous, godfearing, rich and caring man, that awaits them after graduation.Lolz!

As if such man exist, there is no such complete man my dear, adjustability and adaptability is the key. Funny, before many realise it, time has really gone and all what remains of a once gorgeous and futuristic lady, is "bubus" or "left over" of Campus boyfriends who have left them to chase money and comes back for younger girls, C.E.O's and bosses who are already married and needed a side chicks to chyke and pays off.

Sadly, she begins to chase career as the only source of joy at 30, by 32 she realised time has completely gone and would start calling boys and men all sort of names. Like guys are wicked, kill a guy before a snake..Forgetting how she mocked a classmate of her that got married at 20, saying she ain't matured... Now the time has spoken.

(II) Parents are another factor that stands on the way of many young girls, they compare their life with hers and wants things just the way they want it to be. Also forgetting the philosophy of destiny and concept of individuality (theory of ori). What works for you may not work for me.

To me, parents have not also helped their girl child in dictating the choice of spouse. It has constitutes considerably a greater influence to the high rate of divorce we see today, except if we want to be costly with the truth.


I have seen a Muslim female friend, who took a guy of the same religion home, but the parent says they don't like the guy's profession (A police officer). The girl obeyed, cut off the relationship, brazed and opened up for another. She luckly got another guy who had all what she wanted in a man, she was feeling lucky and always telling me so many sweet things about this guy.

Many a time, she had put a call across to me to speak to this new found guy, we have talked at length and Heaven knows that, this guys is so cool and eternally mature. I pray secretly for her, being a sister until she went home again and the dad said Another NO "The guy is from a tribe" that their town hates so much... She cried so bitterly, and by now i just have to tell her "All is well". She threaten to take her life but the mother pleaded with her to try one more time. And finally for the 3rd time, took another guy home but of different religion. Now the dad says no, the mum says no and the siblings said she bleeped up. Lol!

I just pity her...knowingly fully that she is on another round of ill-fated husband whala, she got pregnant for the 3rd guy and leaves the parent..

But deed down, inside me, i know she loves the 2nd guy so much that she never stops talking about him. Thank god, she told me she loves the present guy as well, may be it could have been a marriage borne out of distress. Hmn! Life is indeed not fair but our parents have made it sometime more unfair.

Micronut Writes from the cradle.

k

now that's a long 3 page post

So long a letter.

Dis too much! Sorry Can't read it jooor

The problem of old girls is people like you who can stop perpetuating your weird stereotypes on them.

I took my tym to read the post.... Well the op seems right....

But its not in all cases, that I have learnt.. We are in an economy whereby its so dificult for one to settle down and cater for himself yet alone a family... Well , its not easy, wheneva d lord blesses, one will marry...

donholy28:
now that's a long 3 page post

Exactly,,

raayah:
The problem of old girls is people like you who can stop perpetuating your weird stereotypes on them.

It's not stereotype, it's to serve as lesson to those coming behind to follow.

micronut:


It's not stereotype, it's to serve as lesson to those coming behind to follow.

What Lessons exactly?? That women should marry any man they see because of menopause? There are many great medical technologies that ensure that women of any age can get kids. There is also surrogacy and adoption.

There is nothing wrong in living your life and waiting for a man who fits you. Marriage is for life and you shouldn't go into it unhappy or unfulfilled

Cutehector:
I took my tym to read the post.... Well the op seems right....

But its not in all cases, that I have learnt.. We are in an economy whereby its so dificult for one to settle down and cater for himself yet alone a family... Well , its not easy, wheneva d lord blesses, one will marry...

The writeup is targeted mainly at the women folk, men can choose to marry at anytime... Just taking a cursory look at the lay down rules, belief and certain principles some girls do lay down for themselves, thinking things would fall in place but sometimes not as they wish.

Pls summarise.

firstEVA:
Pls summarise.

smile! Now have done that.