ejeh121:
habba nah because of dz tiny piece u quote every paragragh lyk dz? Oga u sabi copy no be small. .

abi u wan voluntia

safarigirl:
go and check how many 'desperate' women are marrying broke guys. You people talk as if naija men are gods that girls should fawn over, who una be sef? Are you perfect? If a leech is coming your way, then na you go find trouble, dem no beg una to toast them. Guys wey get no dey complain, people wey no get go dey call girls gold digger.

[size=13pt]
Lol..

I had to laugh at the vapid shitt you spew.
even if i have money that is dropping on the floor. I can't spend N5 on 'money centered woman', all in the name of pleasing her.

Infact, relationship with a woman aint my priority,neither do I have a Gf in the country, and I am ok with that. so who they pursue who and who dey complain.
I just made my opine known and you equate it to complain.

We have over 70million peeps living under 1$ per day. Those are the people I spend my last box on without a blink or complain.

And about who we be. We be "naija men". Any more question.:
[/size].

mikolo80:
so we no go arry again because of politician dem abi wetin be dis nonesense you de talk

Man, I didn't even know where to begin correcting the guy's flawed mentality.

Teempakguy:
I have to add something.


I still don't understand why guys are allowed to go after pretty and curvaceous girls in peace, while girls are criticized for going after rich men. It's basically the same.

And as if that is not enough, they criticize ladies that go after

1. Looks.
2. Intelligence.
3. Fame.


In short, if they had their way, they would want every lady to date, poor, ugly, dumb guys . . . just because . . .

I know how much cream costs, powder, lipstick, clothes, I've often been forced to go shopping with these girls, and I have been shocked at how expensive it is to be beautiful. Yet, men go after them . . . with nothing. How do you expect her to keep up the ruse?

But wait, you expect her to use her money, right? But then, why would a lady that is rich enough to take care of herself, settle for a poor dude? Love isn't THAT blind. And the worst part, this doesn't stop with money alone, if a lady says she would love to marry a handsome man, guys will quote her and insult her. Saying that she will have to settle for anybody when her time runs out.
If she insists on dating someone with a good command of English, they will criticize her as well. If she says she prefers dating doctors, or a certain flavour of engineers, they will gather around to call her a gold digger of sorts.
If she says she wants a tall man, they will insult, if she says she wants a confident man, they will insult. They will insult if she friendzones. WTF?!!!!!

Guys, this . . . is not that fair oh. . . . we need to give these guys a break and let them choose for themselves. Being broke doesn't make you special. It makes you . . . broke and undesirable to women. I have seen many of you claiming that one day, you will be rich, but in reality, the odds are against you. It is very likely for her to regret staying with you however.

Let the women choose what is best for them without insults and criticism. They have rights too.


That's all.

thanks, I thought I was the only one seeing this attitude

humilitypays:
I am very aware that what I am about to write will not go down well with many readers on this forum, but then, the truth must be told.

In as much as I do not support single ladies being too forward about money and material things, I do not support a single guy going into a relationship when he has not found his direction in life; more especially nowadays that increase in population has made it very difficult for young people to find job after school.

I will be making reference to the Holy Bible to back up my stand, but before then, let's take a look at some of the disadvantages of a guy going into a committed relationship when he is still struggling:

1. He gets distracted: women are emotional creatures that require lots of emotional attention to satisfy, so for a guy who's still struggling financially, keeping a committed relationship will most likely distract him from chasing his life dreams.

2. Financial waste: no matter what you think or say, keeping a girlfriend cost money, especially nowadays that technology has taken over the world.

Buying call cards to say hi to her, buying gifts for her on special occasions, taking her out for dates, and other frivolous spending cost money which the guy can invest on himself to acquire ICT skill/certification, etc.

I won't bore you guys with too many points, so let me jump straight to the Bible backing.

During the process of creation as narrated in the book of Genesis, the world was without form, nothing existed and God created heaven and earth, sea, oceans, forests, trees, animals and every other thing on earth.

And God looked at the earth and saw its beauty, and decided to create the first human.

Please I want you guys to pay close attention to the preceding paragraphs of this write-up.

When God decided to create human being, God didn't create man and woman the same day, instead God first created man- Adam.

Adam lived alone for long, moving around the earth (Garden of Eden), taking care of the animals, trees, fishes, etc and God saw that He was lonely and needed company and helper, and God decided to create Eve to keep Adam company and to also be his helper.

The moment Adam woke up and saw Eve, he fell in love with Eve without waiting for many years to develop love, and Eve also fell in love with him without having to screen him to know how much he's worth and what he has to offer her.

Note 1: there's true love at first sight, don't doubt it or condemn it, its real!

My point:

God first created Adam, and Adam had virtually everything he needed to survive- shelter (whether under tree or whatever), food, etc before God brought him a wife!

So to the single guys reading this, please pray to God to bless your daily life activities so that you can succeed first before getting a woman, and you know why?

1. Woman is not the most important thing to a man, his work (goal in life) is.

Give a poor man the most beautiful woman who truly loves him, I bet you guys the man will run abandon the woman lol

2. A man feels more good in a relationship when he is financially stable than when he is financially broke!

3. No matter how rich a man's girlfriend/wife is, the man will never feel satisfied with the woman until he himself is financially stable too.

4. The true behaviour of a man can only be known when he is financially okay, and not when he is broke!

5. Naturally, by default, every woman desires to be with a man who is more financially capable than her.

This is one major reason Oprah Winfrey never married. Same reason Linda Ikeji, Genevieve Nnaji, Rita Domnic, Agbani Darego, Rihanna, etc are all single secretly searching for that guy that has more money and fame to come make their dream come true.

Don't ever think guys aren't proposing to the aforementioned ladies because I can bet my nairaland username that thousands of suitors who may not be as rich and popular as them are asking them out on daily basis.

So guys stop nagging and attacking the ladies; ladies aren't the problem, our common enemies are the past and present politicians who ruined our national economy, leaving the youths helpless and jobless!

It is the politicians that we youths should hate and attack for embezzling our common national wealth for their personal use.

We need to pray for a better Nigeria with many great job opportunities for the youths, and we must also condemn giving better jobs to females who do not qualify to the detriment of guys with better qualification.

Lastly, ladies please I am not encouraging going after already made guys only, please give all guys equal chance of friendship because that broke guy today maybe the next Forbe's billionaire tomorrow, so always pray for God's direction and do use your wisdom!

Guy, u made sense jare. God bless you and make u wiser.

Flashh:
Only gold-diggers and runz girls go into relationship with the mentality that it's a guy's duty to spend on her.

So I think you are referring to "runz girls" in your post, not a real woman who knows she can live her life without depending on a man financially in a relationship.

You didn't tell us where it is written in the bible that a man should be responsible for the bills of a woman he hasn't gotten married to.

Relationship isn't something you buy with money by spending for a girl/lady. So get that!

i intended to comment but when i saw your username i comment my reserved

kelkelk:
it is so sad a reality the kind of cultural values we live with today so based on falsehood, greed and selfishness and not essentially on the higher codes for living ; first your own fulfillment in life is based on how much imput or value you are to those you live with not the other way round ..it is more blessed to give than to recieve ..this goes for both sexes. There are phases in life for every man ; good women understand this. There are women who are submitting cvs' for their husbands and are not ashamed about this because they understand the need for that time being is to secure a job for the man or a better paying job if he has one already, to further secure their better and happier future together.Their are couples who are co sponsoring one of either couples first or second degree without being ashamed of it, if its the man this is being done for for the same reasons. The female figures you mentioned earlier if they understood this simple truth would not be going about as singles or single mothers today but would most probably be in healthy marriages. For those guys who run off with the next lady with better features / curves , they are only as good as their counterpart female gold diggers . Why look for ready mades dont you know you are specially gifted and fearfully made by God to make great men? wake up!

[size=13pt]
Well said.

Truth from the horse mouth. It is sickening seeing ladies subscribe and justify gold digging all in the name of seeking financial security.

What happens to helping the guy with vision attain the peak of his success and potentials.

They are all looking for "ready made men" to leech on. And they expect such person to take them serious.

Sickening and disgusting sentiment.
[/size].

Believe it or not 90% of ladies above 35 years pray for a husband!they cry at night on their beds not only because they are sleeping alone but also because their friends/Colleagues are married,they are in pressure,go to the biggest churches 70% are ladies their biggest tithe and offerings are geared towards a miracle husband,go to Christ Embassy or Winners Chapel u would understand,Men pray for a gentle,humble wife not a Treacherous wife! The bible u quoted we all know the story about how Eve gave Adam instruction and the world is still suffering for it! The bible also tells us that a woman MUST be under a man,and that she must "submit" to men but it doesn't make him to take advantage of her to be chauvinistic. The Bible still tell us that its better for a man to sit on top of the roof than to live in a house with a nagging wife! U don't know the bible more than most of us. Sincerely I've seen highly placed ladies that sleep with their house boy/Gate man/security etc when they don't get love they need sex! Agbani Darego her Miss World got into her head if u were close to her she dreams of a man to marry,Rita Dominic lives with regret that even Tonto Dike is Engaged Omotola has stopped having children her daughter is a graduate already,I've had close shaves with Genevieve Nnaji she is so pompous that men avoid her she's getting worn out! Oprah Winfrey has achieved a lot on life but nobody in his sane mind especially in America wants to marry her if she finds a husband it would be just to "service" the thing to avoid rust,she has adopted many children cause she can't have her own children due to menopause! She cannot buy a husband in the market with her billions of dollars,They are all incomplete without a husband! No matter how highly placed a woman can become if she don't come down that "high horse" she would remain depressed for the rest of her life! A lot of marriages break up because the woman wants to be in charge of the home,but God made the man the "Head" of the house. I've see wives that earn twice more than their husbands yet neighbours don't hear her voice,I pray for such a wife I believe I will find her. So my sister don't end up like those ladies u mentioned,as for me I would never marry such ladies I'd rather remain single HOHA!

Nt all d rich guy went broke lera on, bt I tell u, u will surely hit a rock on dis ur Pursue 4 already made, because u re nt a material 4 already made. I guess u shLd be in ur 10th relationship wit already made, y re u nt married. Dnt think d already made are fools. They knw gold diggers wen dey c 1. So grow up, so ur list won't be up to 20

safarigirl:
The only reason this OP has just 11 Likes is because it's not a woman-bashing topic that will make under-achieving guys feel good about themselves. @OP, broke guys dey wait make one rich guy marry their sister come dash them business capital wey dem no gats pay back

Hehe, calm down.. ..the OP so mixed up things, so funny he finally put the blames on politicians that looted our money, Lol,

The truth remains that ours is a system designed from time immemorial that women should be Loved and taken care of, and trust me we men never had a problem with it, for centuries women have been house wives, the man goes out and hustle, the woman puts the home in order.

When my parents got married, my dad just finished apprenticeship, my mum just finished her class 5, guess what? They both planned their lives, their higher education, employment, every damn thing together, side by side, that's marriage. Once the man has character and focus, get with him and be a light to his path. Things spoilt so badly cos we have been shamelessly trying to adopt some vague western way of life.

Have you ever wondered why it's only girls that have getting a husband as a prayer point? Ever heard your pastor raise prayers for men they are yet to get a wife? How many men wait to get married so their wife would sponsor their education or set up a business for them? The answer is the system, apart from the very few women that surpassed the norm, the majority of others still see getting married as changing their level, little wonder why they won't marry unless you're financially more capable than them?

Do you know that in some parts of Asia, your family is required to pay dowry that goes as costly as a car to a man before the man would accept to marry you, with plenty shakara sef? You can research on that. It's their own system. Nigerian girls won't see that one to copy.

Am hustling to raise my standard of living and that of anyone that encouraged me. If and when I'd get married, it'd be for the sole purpose of marriage, companionship not adoption.

Forgive me for writing so much, am not preaching, let's change our mentality about this things. The only reason men objectify women and treat them like lesser beings is because of your kind of mentality, women bashing threads is just one of such treatments. And believe it or not just like the "under achieving guys" u cited, (whatever that means), this thread is making you feel good, and it's false hope.

Owoplenty:
i intended to comment but when i saw your username i comment my reserved

What happened to his username?

see this materialistic tendency is majorly in African ladies i bet you bro....majorly Nigerian ladies maybe Cos they watch channel E too much and want to make the kind of hair dress etc that they see online. Ask jim iyke and mikel why he refused to date Nigerian gurls. i understand that the economy is bad,no job so the ladies want to live good lives thats why they prefer an already made man. Imagine if Dame patience jonathan did not stick with mr jonathan when he had nothing we would have had a better country probably but she would never had been first lady.

What am saying is ladies should look beyond what their guys are presently. They should learn to judge by their hard work and how much they are willing to improve.

Joel osteens wife said she met a lady who was struggling to meet her husband joel and she asked ppl who that lady was and they said she was the gurlfriend but left cos the guy was not bouyant and only had dreams.
joels wife walk up to her and said thank you for leaving joel u made a space for me to come the woman cried and walked away.

Finally no matter how stupid men may try to be they rarely forget the woman that stood with them thru thick and thin.....thats why Nigerian men always love their Mums coa their wives arrived wen the tables was already set for the "oriaku"

no lady should marry any guy solely because of money.its not fair to him especially if he loves you... you can pray for a successful man...


the solution to all these is simple..


marry the one you're in love with money or no money,you'll still stick together, that's where happiness lies.

and trust me happiness is all you need in this fleeting world..

Good fr them but knw some wey dey regret later...LOVE 1st and hustle together

Humilitypays: you soiled this nice write-up with an excuse for those female celebs you mentioned. Dont give excuse on their behalf, especially Winfrey, Dominic.


To say that because THE MAN never show face is the reason they're all maintaining such status quo, is totally unacceptable.


All the examples(single women) you gave are career-driven, and they dont show the desperation expressed in ladies wanting a man to walk them up the aisle.


Besides marriage is no boiled egg, ready to discard the shell and eat. What of both man and wife climbing up the success stairwell(starting from the scratch e.g Obama) to a big, bright future?

tosyne2much:
Brilliantly written and analyzed


Op, are you implying that money-making is an automatic passport to finding that right girl ?


All i know is that whether you are rich or poor, you can still invite a bull crap girl into your life

Finding that right girl takes more than money but other things which may be quite unnecessary to mention


I hate this silly mentality of NIgerians that the sole reason why a guy should be rich, is to make himself attracted to ladies or be in good relationship


As for me, i dont dwell in that silly notion cos im not striving hard to be rich just because i want to find that right girl or have a peaceful relationship, but because it is a necessity that i improve my standard of living against all odds


Lastly, ur Biblical reference is quite unnecessary cos it does nt in any way collerate with your points.


Mind you, Adam never hustled before he was put in a position 2b custodian of the garden of Eden... God provided everythin by default

Btw, nice write-up

(looks for thumbs up smiley, cant find)

McCarlito:
And statistics have it that girls going for "Ready-made" men mostly end up as single parents....





















Any lady that was not there thru my struggles would never had made my list of marriageable partners

True man, I've also discovered that ladies who want a ready-made man are lazy and golddigger

cyprus000:
[size=13pt]
Lol..

I had to laugh at the vapid shitt you spew.
even if i have money that is dropping on the floor. I can't spend N5 on 'money centered woman', all in the name of pleasing her.

Infact, relationship with a woman aint my priority,neither do I have a Gf in the country, and I am ok with that. so who they pursue who and who dey complain.
I just made my opine known and you equate it to complain.

We have over 70million peeps living under 1$ per day. Those are the people I spend my last box on without a blink or complain.

And about who we be. We be "naija men". Any more question.:
[/size].

feel free to tell people who care. Congrats, I don't have any boyfriend in this country either cuz girls like me aren't in demand. It is those girls fondly called 'gold diggers' that attract guys cuz most guys just want a girl with a hot body, sex is what drives them. They don't realise their hot bae has a bad character until after they've shagged her, sometimes more than once. You put yourselves in these situations, you toast these girls. So, what is the problem? PS: I'm sure you have lots of dirty words in your vocabulary, but if you want to converse in terms of 'shiit' and 'phuck', you should know that I have at least 3 years of working experience over you with that.

TroubadourM:


Man, I didn't even know where to begin correcting the guy's flawed mentality.

'bet ' wetin I talk Wey wrong na
Konji de
woman de
she no complain
and time is going

Yeah you have a point men shouldn't be mad when a woman goes for ready made men. After all who really wants to go for a woman that can't even hold her own and support herself financially?

This is not the 1950s era where men have to cater to your beck n call, get off your yansh and raise your level.

Yeah if he your husband of course he will support you, but it goes both ways it a partnership for life.

But a mere girlfriend wanting her man to play " Daddy" n supply all her needs? Lol grow a spine and make your own money.

Plus those ready made men aren't looking for commitment, he probably has many side dishes to go with the main meal.

I personally can't live my life like that, using my pus.sy as a bargaining chip to get funds, it the same thing as an ashewo wanting payment for services, I got dignity to me.

I've been with my man through the good and the rough times, even supported him when he been down financially without malice or judgement because I know it just a temporary setback.

He been there for me too when I've struggled, we help each other out, after all it a partnership not queen to slave.

I love my Igbo/Edo Obim very much, man of good conscience, not perfect but hey I ain't exactly an angel myself.

But I stick by him through thick n thin coz I know no matter the circumstances, we hustle n work together to progress.

[/And ladies, keep searching for "made men" ehn. To one made man, there are 150 interested babes. HE'LL BE A FOOL NOT TO MESS AROUND! After suffering he'll now settle with one woman? RUBBISH! Which one is love? Did you love him when he had nothing? ABEG SHARRAP DER!!![/quote]

Well, OP does not get it really. Nobody is against anyone marrying rich. But it should NOT become the over-riding criterion.
But as it is now, though many ladies would pretend otherwise, wealth is by far the most important factor for them. A meal ticket/easy way out of poverty.
Yes, some may later cheat with a handsome guy at work and even fall in love with him. While married to a rich man.

You will hear things like: na love I go chop?

Every rich/comfortable guy knows that he's a hot cake to many ladies. Some make full use of that status.

Nyc one, make sense.

This is just an opinion, not facts. Infact any man who waits to be financially made before pursuing a woman might not like the outcome.

The successes of the successful men I know took off as soon as they found and settled with a suitable partner.

Don't underestimate the power that comes with the love of a woman. It will spur you to achieve things you never thought possible - unimaginable success. Nothing motivates a man more than the thought of having a woman to feed and fend for at home.

Most people who wait to be financially capable before finding love always end up unhappy. This applies to women as it does to men.

Flashh:
Only gold-diggers and runz girls go into relationship with the mentality that it's a guy's duty to spend on her.

So I think you are referring to "runz girls" in your post, not a real woman who knows she can live her life without depending on a man financially in a relationship.

You didn't tell us where it is written in the bible that a man should be responsible for the bills of a woman he hasn't gotten married to.

Relationship isn't something you buy with money by spending for a girl/lady. So get that!

Nice talk dear

God BLESS mai HURSTLE

safarigirl:
The only reason this OP has just 11 Likes is because it's not a woman-bashing topic that will make under-achieving guys feel good about themselves. @OP, broke guys dey wait make one rich guy marry their sister come dash them business capital wey dem no gats pay back

Safarigirl,

The number of rich men in Nigeria is fairly low. Not more than 25%.

NLers may not actually be as poor as you may think. Many might be in world top 10% by assets/wealth.

No, no one claims to be Dangote. You only need about $67k dollars to be in top 10%. Many here are car dealers, builders, famers, bankers, business people etc.
Even a few inherited rusted roof houses here and there can catapult you into top 10.

So not all are talking out of poverty. But addressing a major issue.

Be it reality or perception. Because it actually affects how many guys view women.

Any woman can be so tagged rightly or wrongly.

And laughing at people for being poor kind of affirms that allergy to poor people that this thread partly addresses.

Most rich people today were once poor or average.

My mother of blessed memory, Mrs. Gladys Eke told me a great thing in our mother tongue, Igbo, but translated to English meaning: "A young man saw a beautiful maiden on the way, but he had no money to pay her bride price and just stood there enraptured by her beauty until another man came and paid her bride price and married her. The poor admirer lost her to the suitor who could afford her bride price". Then my mother said the poor man should not have stood there just admiring the beautiful maiden and day dreaming on loving her. He should have gone to work to get the money to pay her bride price and he would not have lost her. No bride price, no bride. Any man without money asking a woman out is only asking for trouble, because he cannot provide for her. Even every dummy knows the popular saying; NO ROMANCE WITHOUT FINANCE. It is even a popular hit song. Even rich girls don't like broke or poor boys. And following the moral of the story. I never asked any girl out when I was still struggling to make ends meet. Several girls liked and loved me, even beautiful Caucasian babes from America and Europe, but I never asked them out. One love crazy one, Mosumola brought money for me to take her out, but I rejected her offer and she left me alone. Peter Okoye found Lola when he went to collect a fat cheque for his performance at the company where she worked and she fell in love at first sight of the cash flow before she even saw his six packs later. When Peter was still poor and struggling, you could see his girlfried in that old picture was not looking happy. Where is she today? She must have cheated on poor Peter and left him. TuFace Idibia lost one beauty queen years ago, because of his poverty. He was so poor that she even gave him some money and left him for one rich older man. God help you when your girlfriend tells you that she is hungry and you cannot afford to feed her or when she needs sanitary pad and you cannot afford one. She wil leave. Finis.

Then what happens when dat financially balanced guy goes broke? You look for another financially stable guy. Then you tell ur self shit happens. I find a little sense in wat ur saying but can't agree totally with you. If every gal keeps waiting for a financially stable guy in d country then they will regret it because soon tthey will pass their menopus lookin and waitin for d financially stable guy of which you and I know quite well dat such guys are as few as d word few. At dat point they realise dat d same guy dat is not financially stable is now living large and having a beautiful family. All they needed was a little patience coz d only thin dat is constant is change and there is no one man born by a woman on earth dat doesn't have ambition or destiny. So you tell me which is better, endure alittle and enjoy d rest of ur life or just live by d moment and regret d remaining days of ur life...statistics has proved dat most successful and financially stable guys don't take d ladies seriously.. They ve had more broken relationships than d average guy, because of varieties at their corridor.

this write up i guess is base on ur kind of lady. i want u to knw dat in a true relationshp, money or material things is not the priority buh love, trust, sincerity and hope. If a lady got attracted to a guy cos of his cash or to tak care of her needs then she's a gold digger. How wil i even knw wat she loves, me or money. We cal dos kinda girls 'owo epo'

@ OP: This is a very childish post. How old are you?

Ontarget:
Why must the guys always be the rich ones in the relationship and ladies always there to be a parasite? Why can't it be the other way round sometimes. Ladies being the rich ones and helping out her guy. Must ladies always be leeches?

So u want to be a leech?