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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience (8373 Views)
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Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by WailingWailer00(m): 7:16am On Oct 14, 2015 |
Make I no laff alone........ MY EXPERIENCE I had just moved out of my parents house and was sharing a room with my "friend". I had no idea he smoked weed, despite his suspicious movements and signature weed scent(abi na odour?) barely two weeks after moving in with him, my worst fears were confirmed as he started bringing home his weed smoking buddies and they would Occassionally roll a wrap and smoke it right there in the room or mix the weed with beans or spagehtti. Being a very curious person i always wondered what made them happy after smoking, so i decided to find out for myself(wrong move) It was a very hot day in february, a saturday i think it was, my friend was out as usual. I searched everywhere for his stash but couldn't find it so i decided to go and Get mine. I arrived the weed joint all sweaty and nervous, half expectingto get muged but nobody seemed to be aware of my presence there, they were all on different planets all expect one i concluded that he must be the seller so i approached him and the following conversation ensued: Me: how far? Weed seller: i dey Me: i wan buy weed Weed seller: how many parcel? Me: parcel ke? Iro oo, na just small i need Weed seller: laughs really hard. bolo leleyi sha(meaning this guy is a dunce oo) Apparently, a parcel of weed is that small wrap, i didn't know that. I thought it was something very large. I gave him 1000 naira and he gave me a tiny wrap of weed with a white paper, i was suprised when he gave me 950 as change. I couldn't beleive weed was that cheap. On my way home, i decided not to smoke it but mix it with beans because i thought that it will be better that way (another wrong move). Long story short, i cooked beans and added the whole weed, ate it and called my friend, I told him ogbeni i just ate weed oo and nothing happened to me this one that you people will eat and be feeling funky, i don chop am oo. My friend was like ehen you be strong man oo I decided to take a quick nap before doing laundry, i woke up about 20 minutes later on the floor i was banging my head on the floor, and i couldn't stop, my heart beat was so audible and fast, everything was extra bright and extra loud. -_-------_--------_------------_------------_---------_-------------- After a few minutes of head banging, i was able to get up from the floor, I felt as if i had just gained access to a part of my mind that I never knew existed previously, it was scary and cool at the same time. I could feel the blood flowing in my veins(you have to experience it to believe it. Though I strongly advise against it) i felt so uncomfortable in the room, it felt like i was in an oven suddenly a voice in my head whispered "ogbeni bo aso e joor" (off your clothes) i obeyed. The voice came again oya sa re(now run) that was when i realised that the weed had taken effect so i decided to take a shower to see if it will calm me down, but the water felt so hot on my skin so hot i ran out of the bathroom. I called my friend to see if he could help me make sense of what was going on but he laughed at me, he asked me the quantity of weed i took and i told him i used a whole parcel, he said guyyyyy you don eff up if you no sleep in the next 30mins, you go mad oo go chemist make you go explain yourself. By this time things had escalated, i had a severe itch at the back of my head that wouldn't go away nomatter how hard i scratched and i was convinced that the beating in my chest was an evil spirit that could only be killed with a punch. I ran to my neighbour champion and told him champion e jo e fun mi lese laya(champion pls punch me in the chest) ti e ba gbami lese laya mo ma ku oo(if you don't punch me i will die oo) he hissed and walked out having had enough of such nonsense from the boys in the boys quarters. The voice in my head came again iwo na o de gba ara e lese laya abi o ti fe ku ni(why don't you punch yourself in the chest or do you want to die?) i punched and punched but there was no difference. The house was getting hotter, the voice in my head was getting louder, the itch in my head was getting worse, and the evil spirit in my chest was getting louder. Then came the voice again oya ma sare lo(start running) so i started running but on getting outside in the sun, i felt so cold i was shivering but that didn't stop me from running(i would have given husain bolt a run for his money on that day). On getting to the chemist, i realised i was bare footed, i told him i had a severe headache i needed something to make me sleep immediately, he gave me the drug and i chewed it right there in his presence, next i asked him to give me a drug for evil spirit, that was when he realised something was wrong with me and chased me out. I got back home and tried to sleep but my heart beat wouldnt let me, so i ran back out this time around to a nurse in the area, first thing she asked was kilode o wo bata ni? (why don't you have your shoes on? I told her jackie chan ti gba bata lowo mi (jackie chan collected my shoes) i was finally able to explain my situation to her and she took me in, tied something around my elbow and injected me directly in the vein. I passed out immediately only to wake around 1 or 2am in the middle of the night with the worst kind of hunger I have ever felt in my life. I ate a whole loaf of butter field bread in one sitting without butter or tea. I came home to a hero's welcome, my friend told me e be like say your head no carry am but e go better make you try am once more so you go dey use to it. The following day while the house was empty, I packed my Ghana must go and like the prodigal son in the bible I went back home to my parents. It's been a few years since that experience but the lesson I learnt is an unforgettable one. My curiosity hasn't gotten me in trouble again and my circle of friends have since changed. Lol....... ![]() ![]() ![]() CC: Lalasticlala Wailing Wailer 5 Likes 2 Shares
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Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by fromnigeria(m): 7:18am On Oct 14, 2015 |
u 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by Bambless1(m): 7:18am On Oct 14, 2015 |
![]() 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by mayorkyzo: 7:23am On Oct 14, 2015 |
The moral of the story is don't use drugs... |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by kiddkash(m): 7:24am On Oct 14, 2015 |
cool. can't wait to experience mine 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by Nobody: 7:27am On Oct 14, 2015 |
So "Oya sa re wa gba" means "run come and take"? That's all I learnt from your post; the meaning of 'sa re' ![]() Next time na Yaba left you go wake up, tied to a bed and on admission for one year. |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by WailingWailer00(m): 7:28am On Oct 14, 2015 |
20pounds:Ogar, what makes a real man is ability to correct mistakes ![]() |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by izuch(m): 7:28am On Oct 14, 2015 |
Nah God save you, you for dey waka for road now with rag cloths and long dirty dada, dey pick dirty. ![]() ![]() ![]() 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by Jalubarika(m): 7:33am On Oct 14, 2015 |
Exactly the same way it happened to me in 2003,gosh I thought I had gone mad. Instantly my network of friends changed. I still dey try one or two puff anytime I'm with niccurs. One/Two highest ![]() 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by buzquet(m): 7:38am On Oct 14, 2015 |
U don't av to imitate anybody, be yourself! Next time u wanna try something new, start from the scratch |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by phransix147(m): 7:40am On Oct 14, 2015 |
This used to be one of the funniest stories I ever read on NL and that was so many years back... It has been resurrected again, same words no editing. I didn't laugh dis time around. I read it to see if there's any difference but none. We maybe it was resurrected for those who are new here and haven't read it b4. 1 Like |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by WailingWailer00(m): 8:02am On Oct 14, 2015 |
phransix147:Ogar, we know you are an old man on Nairaland, some people are enjoying the story, did you pay anyone to write stories for you? Bad belle people ![]() 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by acenazt: 8:07am On Oct 14, 2015 |
Hhehehehhehehehe Mehn My first time no bad reach ur own ohh. My first time me just enta school my guy MiMi com yarn me say G shisha dey ohh. We enta him car go buy flavor me go to buy Snack cos me dey hungry before i come Back him mix the flavor with SK. We blaze d shisha Finnish him and dem other guys come say make we waka small as we enta one uncompleted building na im MiMi come share us 1 wrap of SK each. Me no want dull so i follow d guys Blaze the tin. As we dey waka i come begin notice say my Left i dey Voluntarily close. We been be like 5 wey do d blaze 3 of us na Newbies One of d newbies wey name na Musty Miss road till we go look for am. As we enta back school na so so happy i just det feel. We play ball reach evening for school that day. 1 Like |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by WailingWailer00(m): 8:10am On Oct 14, 2015 |
acenazt:Hehehehe, bad guy, SK Vs Igboh, which one pass? |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by DeHero1: 8:42am On Oct 14, 2015 |
Nothing to share... There'll never be a first time for me... |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by phransix147(m): 10:44am On Oct 14, 2015 |
WailingWailer00: Must u lie? Its not ur experience... Always give credit to the initial writer... 2 Likes |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by WailingWailer00(m): 12:38pm On Oct 14, 2015 |
phransix147:Bleep off man |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by EbukaHades10(m): 5:27pm On Oct 14, 2015 |
It was funny when it happened to my friend cus the guy don kolo. Na on and off madness, ask him what's the time and he says dem Never give me |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by Marvel1206: 5:41pm On Oct 14, 2015 |
Lwkmd.. You done suffer |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by jimmyolasun: 7:12pm On Oct 14, 2015 |
We both rocked the same boat bro...you could have suppressed it with a saline solution(salt and luke warm water). Lol... Mine was also crazy then in school and only God knows y my shadow keep tickling me in the "head" at the back to be precise.started with the little tickling at the back of the head then an involuntary smile and happiness then everything just change like weather.. I showered, ran around naked tho @nite and did up to a thousand push up( no exaggeration). It was a crazy one that got me crying and praying to God to save me this time that I won't try it again... Ummmh naa lie cuz I still did it again and now tho I'm no smoker of sort buh I'm used to it now... Just curiosity stuffs!! Just trying different drugs shaaaa... |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by THUNDER4real(m): 7:37pm On Oct 14, 2015 |
hahaha loz |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by Sirsoftness(m): 8:20pm On Oct 14, 2015 |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by Sirsoftness(m): 8:28pm On Oct 14, 2015 |
So...I was young and heard dat weed make your hair grow fast,I heard different testimonies so I decided to try it I bought 2 parcel mixed 1 with spirit and looked at the 2nd 1 for some tym I was like wetyn dy dis tin sef wey people dy smoke am dy happy 9 I say mah experiment small sef I wrapped it lite it and took a puff nothing happened I was like wetyn come make dy dy preach against am so I smoked the whole tin. I can remember very well it was raining and I was home alone ah no know how ah take reach out side next tin ah hear na on ur marks gt set go,come and cc me running like a mad man under the rain as if that was not enough I laid on d ground in 1 small puddle say I thinking I was in 1 olympic size swimming pool Weed bad sha |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by Sirsoftness(m): 8:31pm On Oct 14, 2015 |
So...I was young and heard dat weed make your hair grow fast,I heard different testimonies so I decided to try it I bought 2 parcel mixed 1 with spirit and looked at the 2nd 1 for some tym I was like wetyn dy dis tin sef wey people dy smoke am dy happy 9 I say mah experiment small sef I wrapped it lite it and took a puff nothing happened I was like wetyn come make dy dy preach against am so I smoked the whole tin. I can remember very well it was raining and I was home alone ah no know how ah take reach out side next tin ah hear na on ur marks gt set go,come and cc me running like a mad man under the rain as if that was not enough I laid on d ground in 1 small puddle say I thinking I was in 1 olympic size swimming pool Weed bad sha 1 Like |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by emperio212(m): 11:44pm On Oct 14, 2015 |
done |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by Nobody: 9:52am On Oct 15, 2015 |
mayorkyzo: Haba!! But Igbo no be drug O |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by Sammywalex(m): 8:21pm On Oct 17, 2015 |
Some dude posted this sometimes around last year, before the nairaland crash. So "Wannabe" this ain't you, give credit. |
Re: Funny Story - My First Time Weed (igboh) Experience by dododawa1: 7:43am On Oct 18, 2015 |
I no believe JOOR |
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