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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians (42079 Views)
Any Married Lady Who Never Had This Is As Good As unmarried. / The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians / 8 words of advice for the Unmarried Single Mothers. (2) (3) (4)
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Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Messilistic: 7:06am On Nov 05, 2015 |
Etophikisi:i beg to disagree. It all still falls down to the same societal pressure and stigmatization. Our parents are not even making matters easier. I over heard my friends mom telling her "marriage is life and without marriage shes nothing". Now tell me why that girl wont feel she has attained the highest position. Its just crazy 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Unionised(m): 7:06am On Nov 05, 2015 |
D33VA: Still not getting it bro. All in good time............. |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by eightsin(m): 7:06am On Nov 05, 2015 |
Go get married and have your kids. And why are the ladies avoiding this thread like a plague. 3 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by marshalcarter: 7:07am On Nov 05, 2015 |
Gelengelen:Lwkm.....mehn...are you kiddin me ![]() ![]() 2 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by prettyeyo: 7:07am On Nov 05, 2015 |
In Nigeria, being single is a taboo.. If you don't have a relationship, then you need spiritual deliverance... *smh* forgetting that some people aren't single by choice, while some are!! If anyone is an adult, why don't you allow them handle themselves and mind your own business...Even the married ones sef, are they satisfied, happy or just there because society expects them to be married?? People have had to take wrong decisions because of all this pressure. 4 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by macho44(m): 7:07am On Nov 05, 2015 |
3Dee:U sure say u fit beat am? |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by akeensbussy(m): 7:08am On Nov 05, 2015 |
The Issue of Singles and unmarried is not particular to our society alone. Even abroad, there are benefits that are accrue to you if you are married which singles/unmarried can not benefit from. The reasons people believe you must marry when u are working or when u are of that age. 1. When you are married, the way you take decision before will change. 2. Responsibility has come. 3. Waste of Resources will stop. 4. your excesses will be control by someone. 5. Your Thinking will change. 6. You will be taking serious because you are now serious. etc I may not be able to explain further but I believed those that are married will understand my points. 5 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by slydog(m): 7:08am On Nov 05, 2015 |
In my doctoral class, when we complain about timing for lectures or reading, I try not to complain because when I do both lecturer and colleagues will remind me me that am the only unmarried dude in d class of 6. I just got a ride, and the next question was where is the girl? Not that I don't desire it, but it mustn't be with just anyone, my heart needs to beat for that special one, cos truth be told many young ladies, but few wives. 12 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by missjane: 7:08am On Nov 05, 2015 |
True. In my office, a FG parastatal, I read in the condition of service that married women proceed on 3months maternity leave with full pay while any unmarried or single mother that happens to be pregnant will proceed for their 3months maternity leave without pay. And I'm asking, isn't it better d single mother delivers the child inside the DG's office? So that at least she can be getting paid during the period. I just don't understand this type of discrimination.. a couple of things can make a lady decide to give birth without marriage, everything isn't about promiscuity. It's well o jare.. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Gelengelen: 7:09am On Nov 05, 2015 |
marshalcarter:hahaha....just like d op i dont want to get married. 1 Like |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by hedonistic: 7:09am On Nov 05, 2015 |
Don't mind wicked Nigerians. These are the same people that would insult and mock the hell out of you if you ever encounter financial shortage and run to them for help after you rush into marriage. They will say 'mumu, na who force you go marry when you know say you no fit feed family'. If you know how much the average crèche, nursery, and primary school fees cost these days; if you know how much the average manageable one or two bedroom apartment in a decent area costs these days; if you take stock of the numerous spiralling bills these days and the fact that your earnings are barely commensurate with all these.... then you must give yourself serious brain before rushing into marriage to please foolish people who will not help you when the storm inevitably comes. 17 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Stylaay(m): 7:10am On Nov 05, 2015 |
Mehn I tot I was the only one going through this unnecessary meddlesomeness in my affairs. My own is really irritating any beautiful girl that comes to my unit all my colleagues will be like, "check out this girl na, she will make a good wife". Then the single girls in the office turn the thing to fight o. Using terms like I am not man enough, I have phobia for women, and these are sprinters older than me who have behavioral problems. I had to even cut a male colleague serious warning in the office one day o. The guy wan dey provoke for me cos I wasn't interested in the lady he was trying to hook me up with. Them just feel cos I am tall and handsome I must have to marry by force whereas I am not in any serious relationship 5 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by bisdam9086(m): 7:13am On Nov 05, 2015 |
dearpreye: "getting married isn't the most important thing in life" but having a successor is extremely important. You know how how Celeb row now, baby mama things. It is not compulsory you get married but you need to have a child of your own. 3 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Meiji(m): 7:14am On Nov 05, 2015 |
I've developed a standard response whenever I'm harangued with the "when will you get married" question: I'm working on it. You'll get an IV soon. ...and then change the topic. 6 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Gelengelen: 7:14am On Nov 05, 2015 |
missjane:my sister you are right. thé discrimination is top much. like u Saïd some unforeseen circumstances might make a lady to give birth without marriage. to add...please link me with a job in your parastatal. help a brother. its two years after nysc still nothing is working for me right now. save me 3 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Laredojohn(m): 7:15am On Nov 05, 2015 |
As I will say there is no late comer in getting married, everyone's life is different, we can't use others race to run ours...nice one op 3 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Henrypraise: 7:15am On Nov 05, 2015 |
Vixxie: Tanks n fix |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Nobody: 7:18am On Nov 05, 2015 |
After writing this your epistle, before the end of the week person go still ask you why you are not married. It's the Nigerian way of life and belief that a man is never complete without a wife especially when you are getting older, if you don't want to get asked that question, then pack comot for Nigeria. As far as Nigeria and africa is concerned, you'll continuously get asked that question but the truth is that is not spectacular to Nigerians only. 1 Like |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by ogawisdom(m): 7:19am On Nov 05, 2015 |
StarboyMichael: Nawa ooo a married man or woman is usually seen to be more responsible n this is correct 90percent of d time. Most Landlords won't rent their house to you except u r married, dnt blame them BC if u ve lived in a compound where some single students shared a flat u will understand Some societies won't admit single members, if u like b 100yrs u cant b a member of cmo or cwo in d catholic church without marriage u r stuck in cyo infact u r nt a full catholic until wedded in catholic church Most ppl won't do certain biz with you if u r nt married so if u disappear dey will hold ur wife n children Op hw many armed robbers/criminals r married they r very few majority r single Responsible female must marry b4 35yrs at most dts y Linda ikeji is seen as a waste even when she is a billionaire BC she is single n u can see she is now begging for husband ![]() Responsible males must marry b4 40yrs at most, dts y Jim iyke is seen as irresponsible It's odd to see singles at this age, even God didn't design humans like dt. As for d pastor he is absolutely right married women shouldn't keep singles as close /best frnds. Op stop ranting n go and get married nw if u r old enough ![]() Wtf Here is African get used to it or move to USA or Europe and stop smelling like an as.s hole 3 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Catalyst4eva(m): 7:19am On Nov 05, 2015 |
For the Singles in the house, it is well with u all. Never rush into marriage cuz ur parents, friends or some people out there are pressurizing or stigmatizing u. But get married cuz u want to fulfill purpose and cuz ur time has come. Marriage is worth waiting for; the bible says "Wait for it, for it shall surely come; it shall not tarry" Singlehood is not a curse, it is a blessing. So enjoy it while it last; but in all, Philipians 4:6 says "Be careful for nothing, but in all things by prayer and suplication with thanksgiving, let ur request be made known unto God" God bless u all! 11 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Nayok(m): 7:19am On Nov 05, 2015 |
Op no get point at all, I think say u go attribute/justify ur says with quotes from holy books. Ok, what does God say bout maturity(marriage age)? Doe HE classify married from single? |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by thegoodone2(m): 7:19am On Nov 05, 2015 |
25 is d best 1 Like |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Henrypraise: 7:20am On Nov 05, 2015 |
dhtml18: It's fix now; however, wen pple worked for only 2weeks n go on time off anoda 2weeks, I was told to do 4weeks in n go on time off only 1week. D reason de gave me: u ar not married n we need u on site working |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Henrypraise: 7:22am On Nov 05, 2015 |
3Dee: Lolllzzz very funny. I protested n even told dem I av a dog, my oga for dia still de call me de ask afta my dog. Na force to marry? 3 Likes |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by Gelengelen: 7:23am On Nov 05, 2015 |
Nayok:what if hé doesnt believe in your biblical GOD? |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by yomi007k(m): 7:24am On Nov 05, 2015 |
maryhaam: Hmmmmm No wonder u don't have my time on weekends. 1 Like |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by onelife97: 7:26am On Nov 05, 2015 |
Serious men shouldn't be thinking of marriage but to be carrier minded and make a lot of money money and a lot of money. Marriage is only for women hence it's a scam. 1 Like |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by trishapal(f): 7:29am On Nov 05, 2015 |
Even before I got to the point where the op expressly mentioned it, I already knew he (or most probably SHE) was single and 'unhappy' but pretending to be satisfied. Marriage is a program of God so I don't think anyone should arrogantly explain themselves out for not falling in line with that program. Some unhappy singles instead of talking to God to fulfill His purpose for their lives, resort to self-pride, praising their status in public but weeping in their closets. About people 'prying' into your privacy, you need to know that in Africa, or let me say Nigeria, anyone who says 'it is my life' is not always right - we haven't reached that stage. Very few may talk about your status to mock you but many mean well for you. No matter your achievements, except if God exceptionally does not want you to get married, you need to know that you are not where you should be. And if your petty 'achievements' have gotten into your head that you now think or talk less about marriage, you need some people around you to 'beat' you into order... 1 Like |
Re: The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians by chukxy44(m): 7:29am On Nov 05, 2015 |
Sincerely, there are a lot of working singles who would like to settle down and rise a family beside it makes rational sense to do so when you young and agile not d and fragile. However, the challenge lies within the social-economic situation we find our self in. The average Nigeria lady within 30 and below believes the world revolves around her feet and would rather prefer mundane things than prepare for marriage, so even if a guy proposes at this stage she is far from ready. Economically, the fact remains that money makes the world go round, and today's relationship is spiral bonded by money. Ladies want a successful and a handsome guy but economically speaking how many guys within this age bracket meets their requirement . So today, we have more mature singles and tomorrow we would have much more. |
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