While it is definitely not recommended that you cheat on your partner of either sex, this here submission is for the men-folk. If you must play the game, play it right so you don't mess up whatever good thing you got going on between you and your significant other. These rules would help a great deal.

I like to think of myself as a pragmatist and this view has helped me so far in this thing of ours called life. So, while I may catch some flake for telling it like it is ( addressed to those sanctimonious pricks out there who in the manner of our corrupt politicians would come out trumpeting the " oh my God! You should be ashamed of yourself for harbouring such views real men don't cheat on their partners..." bla bla bla while having their filthy hands underneath the skirt of their housemaid or some bartender or hotel receptionist somewhere), it doesn't change the reality of what is extant in our society with regards to male- female relations;

Worrisome number of men cheat period! You think he's in church right now? Newsflash! He isn't or is about to rendezvous with a curvy willing vixen right after service

Here we go.

1.NEVER FALL IN LOVE WITH HER. THIS IS THE MOTHER OF ALL RULES WITH REGARDS RO THIS GAME. THE DAY YOU DO, YOU'RE DEAD MEAT!

2. NEVER LET HER KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE

3. NEVER LET HER GET ACCESS TO YOUR CELL PHONE

4. EXPLAIN THE RULES OF ENGAGEMENT: NEVER ENTERTAIN HER CALLS. SHE HAS NO RIGHT TO CALL YOU. YOU CALL HER WHEN YOU NEED HER. SHE'S A THING BOUGHT FOR YOUR AMUSEMENT AS YOU PAY HER WELL FOR HER SERVICES.

5. NEVER LAY A HAND ON HER IN WAY OF BEATING OR SUBJECTING HER TO ANY BODY HARM OF ANY KIND SAVE YOU PRACTICE SAME DURING SEX. AND AT THAT IT MUST BE BY MUTUAL CONSENT AND IN THE TERMS OF ENGAGEMENT. IF YOU CONTRAVENE THIS RULE, SHE MIGHT THINK YOU JEALOUS WHICH EQUALS FEELINGS. SHE'LL MANIPULATE YOU COURTESY OF THIS FEELING.

6. NEVER MISS AN OPPORTUNITY TO LET HER KNOW YOU HAVE OTHER CONSORTS. SHE'S NOT SPECIAL AND SHOULDN'T ENTERTAIN ANY NOTION OF SUCH. THAT KEEPS THINGS IN PERSPECTIVE FOR HER.

Who compiled this rubbish.

7. DO NOT GO OUT OF YOUR WAY TO SATISY HER DURING SEX. WHEN YOURE DONE EVEN IF YOU ARE A ONE MINUTE MAN, LIGHT A CIGARETTE (IF YOU SMOKE) AND ATTEND TO OTHER ISSUES. YOU ARE NOT PAYING HER TO BE SEXUALLY SATISFIED.

8. NEVER MISS AN OPPORTUNITY TO HAVE SEX WITH HER FRIENDS. IN FACT TELL HER TO BE THE love-vendor. THIS WILL KEEP THINGS IN PERSPECTIVE FOR HER.

9. NEVER DISCUSS YOUR ISSUES WITH HER FAMILY OR BUSINESS. NEVER!

10. NEVER FOR THE LIFE OF YOU COUNT HUGE SUMS OF MONEY WITH HER AROUND. THATS YOUR DEATH CERTIFCATE YOU ARE MESSING AROUND WITH. NO MATTER HOW ANGELIC SHE SEEMS, DONT MAKE THIS MISTAKE. THESE LADIES DONT PLAY FAIR!

Lool. Make I dey learn o. Cos e no easy to stay faithful.

11. DO SHARE HER WITH YOUR FRIENDS. PERSPECTIVE AGAIN.

12. NEVER ATTEND OCASSIONS WITH HER IN TOW. NEVER! NO MATTER HOW EYE CANDY SHE MAY BE.

13. NEVER ATTEND OCCASIONS SHE INVITES YOU TO OR ONE SHE'S ORGANISING.

14. NEVER LET HER TALK DOWN ON YOUR PARTNER!

15. NEVER GET CORNERED IN THE 'ANGEL OF MERCY' ZONE. THAT IS, DO NOT LISTEN TO HER 'SAD' STORY ABOUT HOW LIFE HAS DEALT HER A BAD HAND AND WHATNOT. ALWAYS REMEMBER THE GIRL YOU BUY RECHARGE CARD FROM HAS NO DAD TOO BUT CHOSE TO SELL RECHARGE CARD DURING THE NIGHT WHILE WORKING AS A FUEL ATTENDANT DURING THE DAY IN OTHER TO SAVE MONEY TO START A SMALL BUSINESS. SHE HAS A VAGINA TOO. COME TO THINK OF IT SHE'S NOT THAT BAD LOOKING.

Must you cheat? Why not stay faithful to your partner and save yourself these rules?

16. DO NOT KEEP HER FOR LONG NO MATTER HOW GOOD SHE MAKES YOU FEEL. YOU STAND THE RISK OF BREAKING RULE NUMBER 1. THERE ARE SO MANY OTHERS TO CHOOSE FROM (SAD ISNT IT BUT THAT IS WHAT OBTAINS).

17. DO NOT DEFAULT IN PAYMENT. AND DO NOT ALLOW HER TO TELL YOU NOT TO BOTHER. ALWAYS INSIST ON PAYING. GLUE THE MONEY TO HER HANDS IF YOU HAVE TO.

18. OF COURSE UNPROTECTED SEX IS A NO-NO!

19. NO LOVE NESTS. DO NOT RENT ANYWHERE WHATSOEVER FOR YOUR RENDEZVOUS. ALWAYS BE UNPREDICTABLE WITH RESPECT TO LOCATION AND TIME. STAY AWAY FROM CHOICE HOTELS,YOU DONT WANNA GET CAUGHT.

20. PLEASE DON'T GET CAUGHT!

There are many more rules but this would suffice to keep your ahead above water in the game. Didn't bother to explain most as they are self explanatory. Comments be they constructive or hate induced are gladly entertained.

Hehe.....

Truckpusher:
Hehe.....

Yeah, messing with their heads this Sunday morning.

Lol @"THIS THING OF OURS. Sounds Machiavellian. Hahaha.

STFUareyouGod:
Must you cheat? Why not stay faithful to your partner and save yourself these rules?

Like I said, cheating is not a model behaviour. All I am doing via my post is trying to make the best of a bad situation. Come on now, you can't tell me the number of folks that cheat both sexes inclusive is not huge. Sure you know someone who cheats save you want to turn a blind eye.

I am just for lack of a better word trying to aid those who can't help but cheat but at the same time love their partners on how best to go about it. You know like eat your cake and have it- until you're caught of course. Everyone gets caught its just a matter of time.

So take it easy. Anything worth doing is worth doing well- even cheating.

Juxtified:
Lol @"THIS THING OF OURS. Sounds Machiavellian. Hahaha.

Hehehe...I smell a fox in the hen house.

4C2215131:


Like I said, cheating is not a model behaviour. All I am doing via my post is trying to make the best of a bad situation. Come on now, you can't tell me the number of folks that cheat both sexes inclusive is not huge. Sure you know someone who cheats save you want to turn a blind eye.

I am just for lack of a better word trying to aid those who can't help but cheat but at the same time love their partners on how best to go about it. You know like eat your cake and have it- until you're caught of course. Everyone gets caught its just a matter of time.

So take it easy. Anything worth doing is worth doing well- even cheating.

lol. My comment wasn't to attack you. It's just me thinking out loud. Like "why do I need to cheat?"

eightsin:
Lool. Make I dey learn o. Cos e no easy to stay faithful.

You my friend are on the road to true self discovery and success! Why? Because unlike folks who'd pretend to be all they are not you seem to recognize the pull of the baser instincts thus taking measures on how not to succumb to them.

Until we come to terms with who we really are when no one is looking we can NEVER beat that debilitating habit or change that unwholesome lifestyle.

Man, know thyself. A greater saying there can NEVER be.

STFUareyouGod:
lol. My comment wasn't to attack you. It's just me thinking out loud. Like "why do I need to cheat?"

We all wonder why? Guess it's human nature maybe? The pull of adventure maybe, trying something different or just doing it to see if we can get away with it. Honestly, I've been pondering on that question for years.

iceberylin:
Who compiled this rubbish.

Yours truly!

4C2215131:


We all wonder why? Guess it's human nature maybe? The pull of adventure maybe, trying something different or just doing it to see if we can get away with it. Honestly, I've been pondering on that question for years.

Do you also cheat?

STFUareyouGod:
Do you also cheat?

Not married bro and not in any committed union for now.

Wow...just saw an answer to this post in the works. Well...

4C2215131:


Hehehe...I smell a fox in the hen house.

Hahahaha... While I may not necessarily subscribe to many of his philosophies, Machiavelli is someone I have great admiration for, for his blatantly realistic look on life & business.

4C2215131:


Not married bro and not in any committed union for now.

I take it you are in an open relationship

Juxtified:

Hahahaha... While I may not necessarily subscribe to many of his philosophies, Machiavelli is someone I have great admiration for, for his blatantly realistic look on life & business.

You know what, if we must be frank, that man described life as it is though I admit that having such a suspicious outlook on life is not too healthy but, for he that really wants to get ahead not counting the cost, his is a textbook on the subject matter. Remember Green's book also. It's just a reworked 'The Prince'.

STFUareyouGod:
I take it you are in an open relationship

Not in any relationship for now. Just being the umpire in those of my colleagues both sexes included and learning a shitload of things. Took a well needed break. After a while you get jaded with the whole notion. It's such a beautiful thing when with the right one but getting that right one and working on both your flaws is another thing. But you know what, that is the beauty of it all-the unravelling of each other. Stepping into each other's world and seeing through the eyes of the other person. Sometimes you may not like what you see.

4C2215131:


You know what, if we must be frank, that man described life as it is though I admit that having such a suspicious outlook on life is not too healthy but, for he that really wants to get ahead not counting the cost, his is a textbook on the subject matter. Remember Green's book also. It's just a reworked 'The Prince'.

Exactly!
You mean The 48 Laws of Power? Of course, Those two books I'd recommend for anyone anyday.

4C2215131:


Not in any relationship for now. Just being the umpire in those of my colleagues both sexes included and learning a shitload of things. Took a well needed break. After a while you get jaded with the whole notion. It's such a beautiful thing when with the right one but getting that right one and working on both your flaws is another thing. But you know what, that is the beauty of it all-the unravelling of each other. Stepping into each other's world and seeing through the eyes of the other person. Sometimes you may not like what you see.

hmmmmmmm. Well said. I hope you meet the right person soon. Time to drop the whistle (umpire) and take th stage (Player)

Juxtified:

Exactly!
You mean The 48 Laws of Power? Of course, Those two books I'd recommend for anyone anyday.

Yep! You're right on the money. Cheating seems to be a baser part of the human psyche seeking release and a lot of lives have been lost, families shattered and the like by this d.emon off sorts.

Knowing it lies in not so quiet repose is the first step to defeating it should it begin to stir. And does it stir, oh how it stirs...

STFUareyouGod:
hmmmmmmm. Well said. I hope you meet the right person soon. Time to drop the whistle (umpire) and take th stage (Player)

Hehehe...nah! This attacker is done. Hanging up my boots, going into retirement. Maybe I will take up a manager job eh...

4C2215131:


Hehehe...nah! This attacker is done. Hanging up my boots, going into retirement. Maybe I will take up a manager job eh...

Hehehehe don't be a Villas Boas who took to management at a very young age. You have many years ahead bruv. Don't retire too soon. You can be a Ryan Gigs and play till old age

STFUareyouGod:
Hehehehe don't be a Villas Boas who took to management at a very young age. You have many years ahead bruv. Don't retire too soon. You can be a Ryan Gigs and play till old age

Hahahaha...you crack me up man...hehehe. Sometimes the thing just tire person. Seen much in this ole battle of the sexes. Learnt all I know now via experience and I happen to be among the lucky ones that got away. So I dare post the highway marks for those wanting to travel that road.

4C2215131:


Hahahaha...you crack me up man...hehehe. Sometimes the thing just tire person. Seen much in this ole battle of the sexes. Learnt all I know now via experience and I happen to be among the lucky ones that got away. So I dare post the highway marks for those wanting to travel that road.

lol. I hope others can learn from your experience