Allah(SWT) says in the Qur'an: "Let them remain chaste, those who are not capable of marriage, until Allah(SWT) enriches them out of His bounties." Allah(SWT) says in another verse: " Do not move near fornication/adultery..."

The Prophet(SAW) is reported to have said: "Be mindful of Allah(SWT) with respect to two things, and you shall be rewarded with Paradise". The companions of the Prophet(SAW) asked " What are those two things?" He(SAW) said: " The tongue and the private part".

There is absolutely no room for anything like boyfriend/girlfriend in Islam. It is actually a western concept. It is an avenue through which a boy/man and a girl/woman who are romantically attracted to each other "go out or hang out together".

Some of them have live sex with each other all in the name of boyfriend/girlfriend. Some of them, especially young girls and boys who still fear their parents, do the smooching and other acts that are exclusively for husbands and wives in Islam.

Sex and other romantic acts are exclusively for husbands and wives in Islam ie between married couples. Anything outside this, is a sin in Islam.


In a clear terms, boyfriend/girlfriend relationship is tantamount to fornication/adultery. It has taken different names nowadays; names like:
1. Dating

2. Relationship

3. Boyfriend

4. Girlfriend

5. Courtship

6. Manfriend

7. Just Friends, etc.

Fornication/Adultery is a major sin in Islam. It attracts severe punishment from Allah(SWT) for the doers unless they are forgiven by Allah(SWT).

So, for young boys and girls, there is no need to be in haste. Do not eat the forbidden fruit. Face your studies, plan and pray to Allah(SWT) for guidance and success, and when the time comes to settle down, you will have no cause to regret.

Good one. I also blame some parents. I have heard cases of guys complaining about their parents in this regards. Either way, them guys need to face their book

Empiree:
Good one. I also blame some parents. I have heard cases of guys complaining about their parents in this regards. Either way, them guys need to face their book

Those parents who encourage their children to bring home boyfriends/girlfriends probably lived the same kind of life before they got married! They will be partially held responsible before Allah(SWT)!

Its true

Thanks for the Enlightenment. Jazaakallah Khayran.

But unfortunately very few can abide by this that you've explained above.

Jazakallahu khaeeran

hmmn.. insightful.

btw,listen to my songs at http://my.notjustok.com/p/oracle/

What's the diff btween a girlfrnd/boyfriend with a lover? Is it a sin to make friends with the opposite sex?

thanks OP

but pls as a male how best can you can address opposite sex of yours that you just chat together on FB or NL ?

Jazakallahu khaira Jazaa

op. if we didnt date or court, how i go marry am
jazakallah khair

Jazakhallahu khairan

Op Jazakallahi khaerran

01Mysticdon:
What's the diff btween a girlfrnd/boyfriend with a lover? Is it a sin to make friends with the opposite sex?

My brother u don't need the difference because u understand perfectly what the op is talking about and to the second question


Yes


Islam forbids intermigling between opposite sex except one of u is a wahliy or mahram and with that it also has its level

[quote author=personal59 post=39974651][/quote]

juma'at kareem everyone

daridex:
op. if we didnt date or court, how i go marry am

jazakallah khair

Brother u don't need to court or date before marriage the prophet says marry for religion sake that's the best for u.


Our great grandfathers nd grandfathers never court mostly na arranged weeding nd they never divorce

daridex:
op. if we didnt date or court, how i go marry am

jazakallah khair

If you don't date or court, the number 1 thing that would spur your interest towards marrying her would be because of her religion and thereafter, the genuineness that you REALLY want to marry her and not just use and dump (no offence meant, just explaining).

Marrying someone without the kind of courtship that we know today goes a long way to tell that this person I'm getting married to has a 60% chance of marrying me for who I am and not possibly an angelic figure.

It isn't a matter of meeting someone in a day and marrying such person that day all in the name of no courtship, no; only that Islam has procedures WHEN YOU ARE READY TO GET MARRIED. A lot of us want to enjoy the companionship of the opposite sex WITHOUT accepting the responsibilities of legal spouses, that is what Islam detests.

The danger in having a longterm companionship is the risk of committing fornication, which is a capital sin as far as Islam is concerned.

To think of it, if courtship is the solution to getting married to the wrong person, why then do we have breakups here and there?

I'm married and i am happily married, nothing brought myself and my wife together other than knowing that she is a muslim and a human being. She has her deficiencies and I have mine. We cope with each other like brother and sister and know how to manage our communication. We got married in August of a year and I met her the December preceding that August. What else could have made us marry like that if not the INTEREST to marry.

Yes it forbids boyfriends and girlfriends , it only supports child marriage.

subhanallah! Jazakunmullah khaer. May Allah (subhanahu wa ta'la) reward you abundantly, Increase your knowledge and faith in him. Salaam aleikum waramatullah wabarakatuh.

So there should be no courtship?,we should just get married straight up?.

huh! Op,you see it is the society that is corrupt that makes it look bad with a 'dirty mind' that when a girl & a boy are friend then it is mean to be 'sex relationship'

So,does it mean that the opposite sex should see themselve as enemies? No...we must understand that friendship is what brings people together with good intention.

Good intention is what matters...@op,do not get the message wrong that islam forbid friendship with opposite sex...no,the opposite sex isnt our enemy.just make sure your intention is clean & pure for Allah's sake

Wa Allahu a'lam (Allah knows best)

well said, our parents are part of the problem too. nikah has been made very difficult and fornication very easy. our daughters r too young for marriage but they r not too young to sleep around. we shld try n make marriage easy for our youths. once his character is good and his deen is okay. I do not see reason why dey shldnt b married. former minister of education Prof. rekiyat rufai TLD us she married while she was in SS2. that didn't stop her from becoming a prof. who say u HV to move to ur husband's house as soon as u r married. itf the understanding is there, she can remain with her parent after nikah. once the husband is strong enough he can come n pick his wife. wateva relationship dey HV in that period is halal.

olawaleqaasim:



If you don't date or court, the number 1 thing that would spur your interest towards marrying her would be because of her religion and thereafter, the genuineness that you REALLY want to marry her and not just use and dump (no offence meant, just explaining).

Marrying someone without the kind of courtship that we know today goes a long way to tell that this person I'm getting married to has a 60% chance of marrying me for who I am and not possibly an angelic figure.

It isn't a matter of meeting someone in a day and marrying such person that day all in the name of no courtship, no; only that Islam has procedures WHEN YOU ARE READY TO GET MARRIED. A lot of us want to enjoy the companionship of the opposite sex WITHOUT accepting the responsibilities of legal spouses, that is what Islam detests.

The danger in having a longterm companionship is the risk of committing fornication, which is a capital sin as far as Islam is concerned.

To think of it, if courtship is the solution to getting married to the wrong person, why then do we have breakups here and there?

I'm married and i am happily married, nothing brought myself and my wife together other than knowing that she is a muslim and a human being. She has her deficiencies and I have mine. We cope with each other like brother and sister and know how to manage our communication. We got married in August of a year and I met her the December preceding that August. What else could have made us marry like that if not the INTEREST to marry.

This will not work for everyone..... It's the 21st century



The arabian religion is really outdated

personal59:


Brother u don't need to court or date before marriage the prophet says marry for religion sake that's the best for u.


Our great grandfathers nd grandfathers never court mostly na arranged weeding nd they never divorce

that was then.....looking at how things are right now, people are shadows of themselves...many are fair weather.... so its better you know your spouse too well before jumping into hell

personal59:


Brother u don't need to court or date before marriage the prophet says marry for religion sake that's the best for u.


Our great grandfathers nd grandfathers never court mostly na arranged weeding nd they never divorce

You gotta be kidding me!
So if your dad calls you and tell you "I have arranged a lady for you to marry". What will be the first thing that will come to your mind? You better stop deceiving yourself

daridex:

that was then.....looking at how things are right now, people are shadows of themselves...many are fair weather.... so its better you know your spouse too well before jumping into hell

Well, then, take a sample of those that dated for as long as it takes them around you and see if they all got married. Most won't, some will. For the some, check if they don't have troubles; it impossible.

We fail to understand that we are getting married to human beings and they stand to have their deficiencies.

You know where peace of mind is, if you marry someone who is conscious of Allah, believe me, you will understand that humanly they are incomplete, but as far as what is due to you is concerned, you are guaranteed. Because they deal with Allah first before passing it to you.

Most homes today that find it hard to work with are either of Muslims by name or partially practising Muslims. If fully practising, only experience can convince them.

Humblebloke:




This will not work for everyone..... It's the 21st century



The arabian religion is really outdated

I truly laughed when I saw 'Arabian' religion. The moment it is Arabian it isn't Islam. Islam is worldwide, there is nothing Arabian about it. It is applicable everywhere except where isn't created by Allah.

olawaleqaasim:


Well, then, take a sample of those that dated for as long as it takes them around you and see if they all get married. Most won't, some will. For the some, check if they don't have troubles; it impossible.

We fail to understand that we are getting married to human beings and they stand to have their deficiencies.

You know where peace of mind is, if you marry someone who is conscious of Allah, believe me, you will understand that humanly they are incomplete, but as far as what is due to you is concerned, you are guaranteed. Because they deal with Allah first before passing it to you.

Most homes today that find it hard to work with are either of Muslims by name of partially practising Muslims. If fully practising, only experience can convince them.

Jazzakallah khair

hmmm! The quran is a very fascinating great book,when i study the verses & tafsir about the creation of adam & eve,a question always comes to my mind,why did Almighty Allah created eve(an opposite sex) after adam,why not another adam?

What i know is whatever Allah does,it is for a purpose.

olawaleqaasim:



If you don't date or court, the number 1 thing that would spur your interest towards marrying her would be because of her religion and thereafter, the genuineness that you REALLY want to marry her and not just use and dump (no offence meant, just explaining).

Marrying someone without the kind of courtship that we know today goes a long way to tell that this person I'm getting married to has a 60% chance of marrying me for who I am and not possibly an angelic figure.

It isn't a matter of meeting someone in a day and marrying such person that day all in the name of no courtship, no; only that Islam has procedures WHEN YOU ARE READY TO GET MARRIED. A lot of us want to enjoy the companionship of the opposite sex WITHOUT accepting the responsibilities of legal spouses, that is what Islam detests.

The danger in having a longterm companionship is the risk of committing fornication, which is a capital sin as far as Islam is concerned.

To think of it, if courtship is the solution to getting married to the wrong person, why then do we have breakups here and there?

I'm married and i am happily married, nothing brought myself and my wife together other than knowing that she is a muslim and a human being. She has her deficiencies and I have mine. We cope with each other like brother and sister and know how to manage our communication. We got married in August of a year and I met her the December preceding that August. What else could have made us marry like that if not the INTEREST to marry.

please enlighthen us with the procedures.

Reski:
please enlighthen us with the procedures.

1. Seeking the consent of her Waliyy (Father or any figure of such if father isn't available)

2. The consent of the lady

3. Agreement of Mahr ( this stands as dowry and belongs to the wife)

4. Availability of at least two witnesses

5. Sighatul 'Aqd ( the statement of agreement that would be said between the giver of bride and the receiver or his representative)

6. Publicising it (this refers to allowing people come together for this purpose, but within the financial capacity of the organisers)

I hope the brief is OK. Each of them has its own explanations, but bottom line is for serious minded individuals who aren't searching for angels, none of them isn't achievable given that a genuine interest exists.

And Allah knows best.