greens:

Honestly this is part of the problem. I which I can have someone who will under everything I say. I have kept a lot of things with me in this life because there is no one to say things to.
There is always this feeling that they won't understand. And truely, they don't

Pour your stories here for strangers to chip in, I had stuff from my childhood that kept on recurring in my mind and bothering me, it was this anonymous forums that shed a light to my problems, I felt I was not alone and learned to let go of the past.

I even joined an online support group,( of course anonymous) , nobody in my life knew I was struggling within, i looked happy, fulfilled, comfortable, but inside I was weak and sad. I just fought the hard way and I finally found the strength to move on. You can do it Green, your life is precious, think of your loved ones, your wife and family.

Miami11:


Pour your stories here for strangers to chip in, I had stuff from my childhood that kept on recurring in my mind and bothering me, it was this anonymous forums that shed a light to my problems, I felt I was not alone and learned to let go of the past.

I even joined an online support group,( of course anonymous) , nobody in my life knew I was struggling within, i looked happy, fulfilled, comfortable, but inside I was weak and sad. I just fought the hard way and I finally found the strength to move on. You can do it Green, your life is precious, think of your loved ones, your wife and family.

Even my wife never new the extent of this.
To let her know is impossible

Currently reading this thread as mentioned by one.https://www.nairaland.com/826801/feeling-suicidal-come-here-first/3.
I am just hopeful

greens:
I actually don't know where to start but I am disturbed. As I am typing this I am having a persistent headache. It is somehow complicated to explain. Though I feel it is inborn but a whole lot triggered it even when I was in teen.
I recently visited health center for this reason where I was referred to the human behavioural department.
I was to take a drug called Setraline for a year. Yet, I stopped half way. I still see suicide as the best solution. It is just one time solution.
I also feel I should punish some people by committing suicide.

I have a good wife who have been the only reason why I think I should live. I keep thinking how she will feel if that happens to me.
Plenty things going on in my mind as it has always been.
I don't even know if I need counseling, help, assistant.
I just feel bad for my condition

You know the funny thing: nobody ever get punished by losing a loved one. The wife remarries later, the children grow on and thrive like the father never existed. They only cry for few days. Relatives will come to the burial and still demand for food if any. All he worked for will be lavished by others. After a while, a mansion, school, hospital, market, or fueling station will be built on his grave. And that will be all.
So, Bro, it's not worth it.
When I was younger, I had a big problem sometime then, and my mom said to me: son, sometimes it's as if the sky will fall, yet it won't, it will pass. All thanks to Jesus, they all passed.
(The Kim Avery Story)

Jesus Did It!

When I was 15 years old I became very depressed and unhappy with my life. My parents had divorced when I was 12 and my mom had gotten remarried to a man that had 3 children which lived with us. The marriage only lasted a year and they got a divorce. After this it was just my mom, me and my sister.

My mom had started dating and went out on the weekends. I would usually go out with my friends. I really didn't have a reason to commit suicide now that I think back on what led me to make that decision. I wasn't as popular as I wanted to be and my best friend was becoming popular and getting all the attention from the guys. She had a boyfriend and I didn't. I had started smoking and drinking. This made me more depressed.

On the day I decided to commit suicide, I had been out with my friend. I had a terrible time and started thinking about suicide. We had met these two guys that we knew while we were out and they said they would take us home. We had all been drinking that night but I didn't know the guy that was driving was as drunk as he was. On the way home, I was thinking about how I would commit suicide once I got home.

My mom had always had problems with her kidneys and she had all kinds of prescription medicine in the cabinet. I decided I would take all the pills in the cabinet. Everything that was in the cabinet I would put on the kitchen table and sit down and start taking pills until I passed out. By the time it was morning and my mom got up, I would be dead.

We were just a few miles from home when the driver ran off the road. It had started raining and I guess he must have been driving faster than I realized. The last words I remember being spoken were his friend saying, "Hey man, Get back on the road." The driver must have jerked the truck back on the road because the next thing I remember we were flying through the air.

The truck had hit a row of poles that someone had put up in their yard. The poles were just a few feet high and this caused the truck to go up in the air and flip over. I remember my friend grabbing hold of the steering wheel and saying "Oh my God." I thought to myself maybe I will die in this wreck and then I won't have to go home and take all those pills. This would be easier. It seemed like everything happened in slow motion. I put my hands together and bowed my head and said "Please God don't let this hurt."

The next thing I remember was waking up thinking I was at home in my bed and I was waking up from a dream. I suddenly began to remember what had happened. I had been in a wreck. Everything was pitch black dark and I couldn't see. I tried to move but I couldn't. I felt a horrifying fear come over me. I must be dead. I tried harder to get out of the darkness but I couldn't and I became more and more afraid.

Words cannot begin to describe how terrified I was when I realized I must be dead. I had wanted to die and now I had my wish. I didn't want to be dead if this was what it was like. I couldn't see or move; I was just lying there in total darkness with overwhelming fear and loneliness.

I began to call out to God. "Please God don't let me be dead. I promise to stop smoking and drinking and I will quit thinking about committing suicide." As I prayed to God, he quickly came and brought me out of the darkness. I began to crawl out from underneath the truck and I saw my friends standing there.

We had landed upside down in front of someone's house. They called the ambulance and I was taken to the hospital. It was a miracle that I wasn't dead. My head was split wide open to the bone and I had broken my back. I was lucky to be alive.

Statistics say that someone thinking about committing suicide will usually not tell anyone. This is why when they do commit suicide, everyone is so shocked. They didn't know that the person was so depressed. When I decided to commit suicide, I didn't tell anyone, not even my best friend. The only one that knew my thoughts and what I was planning to do was God.

If I hadn't got into that wreck, I would have committed suicide and probably would have died but God didn't let me. He saved me but when I was lying there in that terrifying darkness, I think he was showing me of what it would be like if I had committed suicide. I would have went to hell. I don't know till this day where I was at, maybe it was the gates of hell and that is why I felt so horrified. All I know is I never want to go back there again!

I urge anyone thinking of suicide to seek help. Trust me you do not want to experience what I did. I am just so thankful that God saved me and didn't let me die. I am grown now and I have two kids and a wonderful husband. My life has been full of trials but God has always been there for me even when I didn't know it.

Kim Avery.

(The Kim Avery Story)

Jesus Did It!

When I was 15 years old I became very depressed and unhappy with my life. My parents had divorced when I was 12 and my mom had gotten remarried to a man that had 3 children which lived with us. The marriage only lasted a year and they got a divorce. After this it was just my mom, me and my sister.

My mom had started dating and went out on the weekends. I would usually go out with my friends. I really didn't have a reason to commit suicide now that I think back on what led me to make that decision. I wasn't as popular as I wanted to be and my best friend was becoming popular and getting all the attention from the guys. She had a boyfriend and I didn't. I had started smoking and drinking. This made me more depressed.

On the day I decided to commit suicide, I had been out with my friend. I had a terrible time and started thinking about suicide. We had met these two guys that we knew while we were out and they said they would take us home. We had all been drinking that night but I didn't know the guy that was driving was as drunk as he was. On the way home, I was thinking about how I would commit suicide once I got home.

My mom had always had problems with her kidneys and she had all kinds of prescription medicine in the cabinet. I decided I would take all the pills in the cabinet. Everything that was in the cabinet I would put on the kitchen table and sit down and start taking pills until I passed out. By the time it was morning and my mom got up, I would be dead.

We were just a few miles from home when the driver ran off the road. It had started raining and I guess he must have been driving faster than I realized. The last words I remember being spoken were his friend saying, "Hey man, Get back on the road." The driver must have jerked the truck back on the road because the next thing I remember we were flying through the air.

The truck had hit a row of poles that someone had put up in their yard. The poles were just a few feet high and this caused the truck to go up in the air and flip over. I remember my friend grabbing hold of the steering wheel and saying "Oh my God." I thought to myself maybe I will die in this wreck and then I won't have to go home and take all those pills. This would be easier. It seemed like everything happened in slow motion. I put my hands together and bowed my head and said "Please God don't let this hurt."

The next thing I remember was waking up thinking I was at home in my bed and I was waking up from a dream. I suddenly began to remember what had happened. I had been in a wreck. Everything was pitch black dark and I couldn't see. I tried to move but I couldn't. I felt a horrifying fear come over me. I must be dead. I tried harder to get out of the darkness but I couldn't and I became more and more afraid.

Words cannot begin to describe how terrified I was when I realized I must be dead. I had wanted to die and now I had my wish. I didn't want to be dead if this was what it was like. I couldn't see or move; I was just lying there in total darkness with overwhelming fear and loneliness.

I began to call out to God. "Please God don't let me be dead. I promise to stop smoking and drinking and I will quit thinking about committing suicide." As I prayed to God, he quickly came and brought me out of the darkness. I began to crawl out from underneath the truck and I saw my friends standing there.

We had landed upside down in front of someone's house. They called the ambulance and I was taken to the hospital. It was a miracle that I wasn't dead. My head was split wide open to the bone and I had broken my back. I was lucky to be alive.

Statistics say that someone thinking about committing suicide will usually not tell anyone. This is why when they do commit suicide, everyone is so shocked. They didn't know that the person was so depressed. When I decided to commit suicide, I didn't tell anyone, not even my best friend. The only one that knew my thoughts and what I was planning to do was God.

If I hadn't got into that wreck, I would have committed suicide and probably would have died but God didn't let me. He saved me but when I was lying there in that terrifying darkness, I think he was showing me of what it would be like if I had committed suicide. I would have went to hell. I don't know till this day where I was at, maybe it was the gates of hell and that is why I felt so horrified. All I know is I never want to go back there again!

I urge anyone thinking of suicide to seek help. Trust me you do not want to experience what I did. I am just so thankful that God saved me and didn't let me die. I am grown now and I have two kids and a wonderful husband. My life has been full of trials but God has always been there for me even when I didn't know it...

Kim Avery

The reality is that only few people know how one feels

Thank you kim

greens:
The reality is

that only few people know how one feels

The reality is you have all the answers. Look within there's nothing outside to help you as far as answers.

Nubian113:



The reality is you have all the answers. Look within there's nothing outside to help you as far as answers.

Hhhmmmm. I am really struggling to cope with it. I know it's not the best from Christian's perspective but it just looks so real as solution.
I have to hide somewhere yesterday and cried for myself. Yet my wife never knew.

LIFE!

greens:

Hhhmmmm. I am really struggling to cope with it. I know it's not the best from Christian's perspective but it just looks so real as solution.
I have to hide somewhere yesterday and cried for myself. Yet my wife never knew.

LIFE!

I'm not religious but I do believe our soul was sent here for a purpose and when we lose the purpose our soul wants out. It isn't about right or wrong it's a journey and one can't conclude half way that it wasn't worth making and their going back home. That's my metaphor for suicide. Now it is obvious that you are depressed so why not solve that problem by getting the medications and riding it through until you feel better? I told you I stayed in bed for 8months and there was nothing physically wrong with me. I knew that better days were coming and I had to put my head down until the Strom was over and the sun came out and a year later it did. Everything you're feeling is natural and normal and all you need is serotonin and love and understanding. You have 2/3 so far.

Please what is serotonin? A drug?

greens:
Please what is serotonin? A drug?

Its the happy chemical our brain makes. Depression is the lack of this chemical in your brain. If you can't increase your serotonin yourself then yeah you'll need antidepressants to replace it for you.

Nubian113:


Its the happy chemical our brain makes. Depression is the lack of this chemical in your brain. If you can't increase your serotonin yourself then yeah you'll need antidepressants to replace it for you.

... Please what drugs do this.
I was on sertaline once but I think I want quick action

greens:

... Please what drugs do this.
I was on sertaline once but I think I want quick action

There's no such thing as quick action when it comes mental health. Sertaline does that its serotonin based. You need to go back on it and be patient.

greens:


I have to take it everyday. But I also reported back to the doctors at intervals. But I only have the feelings that my mood changed after 3 months of taking the drug. But after that, no more changes. I really wanted something quick to happen. But I assumed these doctors are not doing enough.

Hi pls where are you based, would like to talk to you.

gbenga4sure:

Hi pls where are you based, would like to talk to you.

I am based in lagos

greens:
I am based in lagos

5years later and you’re still kicking strong! God be praised!

yettymuse:
5years later and you’re still kicking strong! God be praised!

Unexplainable! But who is like God?

greens:
I am based in lagos

pls can you drop your number or any of your social media handle or send me a pm

gbenga4sure:

pls can you drop your number or any of your social media handle or send me a pm

pm sent

greens:
pm sent

I can't find it,pls message me on the number on my profile
and are you better now

Seek Jesus. There's not a friend like the lowly Jesus.

greens:
I actually don't know where to start but I am disturbed. As I am typing this I am having a persistent headache. It is somehow complicated to explain. Though I feel it is inborn but a whole lot triggered it even when I was in teen.
I recently visited health center for this reason where I was referred to the human behavioural department.
I was to take a drug called Setraline for a year. Yet, I stopped half way. I still see suicide as the best solution. It is just one time solution.
I also feel I should punish some people by committing suicide.

I have a good wife who have been the only reason why I think I should live. I keep thinking how she will feel if that happens to me.
Plenty things going on in my mind as it has always been.
I don't even know if I need counseling, help, assistant.
I just feel bad for my condition

Are you dead?