Once I approached a woman I know from friends. I got to know her a little and all was going great. So I got her number and after a few text message I called.

I was direct and asked her out.

She said - Well, erm, I got a boyfriend you see.
Me - Oh, cool. Hey, it's fine. You take care and it was great meeting you anyway.

What happens next should be made into a god damn Hollywood drama movie. This is how it went....

Evening the phone rings..

Her friend - Hey how you doing Adam?
Me - Oh great. Just going out though
Her friend -Ok but what happened with (name)
Me - Nothing. Why?
Her friend - She said you showed no interest. I thought you liked her.
Me - Huh? I asked her out. She said she got a boyfriend.
Her friend - She hasn't got a boyfriend. She was wondering why you didn't persist?
Me - WHAT?!?!

3 hours later...

Another of her friends - Hey Adam I thought you two were good for each other

Me - What you on about?
Her friend 2 - You know (name). She was all talking about you for 2 weeks. Excited.
Me - (confused)
Me - But she said she has A BOYFRIEND!!!
Her friend 2 - Yeah but all girls say that....you know...
Me - No I don't. If a woman says she got a boyfriend, she has a boyfriend. That's how I take it. What the hell. You and your friends are crazy.

I swear, this went on for sometime and it turned me off with her so bad, I never wanted to ever date her. Ever. If that's how she was then man, forget it.

It be like this.....

Her - I wanted coffee
Me - But I asked if you wanted a drink but you said no
Me - Yeah but you know, I really meant I do want coffee
Me - What YOU ON ABOUT? I asked and you said you didn't want any?
Her - But I really meant yes.
Me - ?!?!?!?!?!?!

When we guys hear no, or got a boyfriend, it means no. It means for us to keep our distance. It means the woman is not interested because I have tried persisting before and I had enough of the BS that comes with it.

You know, some women want attention.

Some want just to feel they can attract a guy but nothing. Some want to drag the BS along for a little longer.

But it doesn't wash with me or many guys.

A no is a no.

So I don't call a woman who doesn't call back. I don't text anymore if women don't text back. I don't wonder about signals....what if and how come. I don't wonder if she might be interested or if I should push it and try again.

I don't mean to sound arrogant but...

The world is full of women. Amazing women. Women of passion, purpose, goals, ideas, creativity and values. By her saying no...it has now freed me to approach other women and I saw it as her being honest.

So awesome. I can move on. I mean no one out of their mind will say no when they mean yes - and yes to mean no.

2+2 = logic!

But you see sometimes logic has nothing to do with what is going on. It's emotions, fears, insecurities, perceptions and a whole lot of stuff I cannot see in a woman's head. All I know is to make sure she feels safe, comfortable and I am not over stepping her boundaries. That she knows I can move on and walk away.

That it's no problem for her to say no or yes. It's ok if I get a no. I'm a man. Strong enough and have higher purpose to let rejection get me down. I solid, rock solid and I'll take a no as a no.

When I hear no, when I see or I don't get much of a response, when I hear any word about boyfriend, or ex boyfriend then like most guys we move on. I see it that if I try anymore I am making the woman feel uncomfortable.

I have self respect and I got to move on.

Playing hard to get may work on some guys but for guys who got self worth and got a lot going on life.....they move on.

The woman got asked, she said no and I haven't got a court order over my head because I didn't take no as...no.

That's why.

Guys, you don't need a drama queen and run away from friend zone with this advice.

Culled from Quora.

You want the guy to retry so you can humiliate him further?

Great.

A person can be either selfish or dumb. But when both those attributes are seen in one person I don't know what to say.

You expressed your feelings of not liking him. He respected that and never contacted you again.

That's it.

Stop expecting guys to run behind you after you have rejected them.

If you are a lady and you are in the habit of doing this then you are selfish and dumb.

Story fr nairaland gods ( Obiorathesubtle )

Give this man a medal

You're on point man

I have never asked a lady out twice.

I just don't care..

Nicely written. I don't have a problem with a woman playing hard to get, infact I want them to protract a bit as it makes me feel more appreciative of them. But when she says she's got a boyfriend, whether true or false, I bow out and save myself from the stress.

If she had said she's not interested in an affair or that she's devoting her time on something else then I can press further until I have my way.

But to dismiss the importance of playing hard to get entirely doesn't portend well. It would more often than not makes a woman appears ignoble. Except in cases, where you have been friends for a while that it's understandable if she succumb without the initial gragra. But if not, let her no persist for a while. Ba wahala.

Op is the girl in question a Nigerian? cos all Nigerian girls always say they have boyfriends.
but we know better

It's pure madness to say No, but meant YES!

Hmm well for me if she says she's got a boyfriend and they are good then I back away,besides if a girl who says she has a bf and you succeed in stealing her away then she can't be trusted when u become her bf cos someone else would probably steal her too from u,anyway I can tolerate a lil hard to get and stick around only if she is single and tells me she needs time to think about it,anything outside of that and am gone,simple as that cos like the Op said there is an abundance of better females everywhere..BTW nice piece man..

My brother you deserve one crate of Heineken!
I have met only one babe who was straight to the point with me didn't play hard to get. Up till today, I value and adore her and I can do almost anything for her.

Our primary school marching song: "...Do not say yes when you mean to say NO, baba Ibadan"

ogzille:
Once I approached a woman I know from friends. I got to know her a little and all was going great. So I got her number and after a few text message I called.

I was direct and asked her out.

She said - Well, erm, I got a boyfriend you see.
Me - Oh, cool. Hey, it's fine. You take care and it was great meeting you anyway.

What happens next should be made into a god damn Hollywood drama movie. This is how it went....

Evening the phone rings..

Her friend - Hey how you doing Adam?
Me - Oh great. Just going out though
Her friend -Ok but what happened with (name)
Me - Nothing. Why?
Her friend - She said you showed no interest. I thought you liked her.
Me - Huh? I asked her out. She said she got a boyfriend.
Her friend - She hasn't got a boyfriend. She was wondering why you didn't persist?
Me - WHAT?!?!

3 hours later...

Another of her friends - Hey Adam I thought you two were good for each other

Me - What you on about?
Her friend 2 - You know (name). She was all talking about you for 2 weeks. Excited.
Me - (confused)
Me - But she said she has A BOYFRIEND!!!
Her friend 2 - Yeah but all girls say that....you know...
Me - No I don't. If a woman says she got a boyfriend, she has a boyfriend. That's how I take it. What the hell. You and your friends are crazy.

I swear, this went on for sometime and it turned me off with her so bad, I never wanted to ever date her. Ever. If that's how she was then man, forget it.

It be like this.....

Her - I wanted coffee
Me - But I asked if you wanted a drink but you said no
Me - Yeah but you know, I really meant I do want coffee
Me - What YOU ON ABOUT? I asked and you said you didn't want any?
Her - But I really meant yes.
Me - ?!?!?!?!?!?!

When we guys hear no, or got a boyfriend, it means no. It means for us to keep our distance. It means the woman is not interested because I have tried persisting before and I had enough of the BS that comes with it.

You know, some women want attention.

Some want just to feel they can attract a guy but nothing. Some want to drag the BS along for a little longer.

But it doesn't wash with me or many guys.

A no is a no.

So I don't call a woman who doesn't call back. I don't text anymore if women don't text back. I don't wonder about signals....what if and how come. I don't wonder if she might be interested or if I should push it and try again.

I don't mean to sound arrogant but...

The world is full of women. Amazing women. Women of passion, purpose, goals, ideas, creativity and values. By her saying no...it has now freed me to approach other women and I saw it as her being honest.

So awesome. I can move on. I mean no one out of their mind will say no when they mean yes - and yes to mean no.

2+2 = logic!

But you see sometimes logic has nothing to do with what is going on. It's emotions, fears, insecurities, perceptions and a whole lot of stuff I cannot see in a woman's head. All I know is to make sure she feels safe, comfortable and I am not over stepping her boundaries. That she knows I can move on and walk away.

That it's no problem for her to say no or yes. It's ok if I get a no. I'm a man. Strong enough and have higher purpose to let rejection get me down. I solid, rock solid and I'll take a no as a no.

When I hear no, when I see or I don't get much of a response, when I hear any word about boyfriend, or ex boyfriend then like most guys we move on. I see it that if I try anymore I am making the woman feel uncomfortable.

I have self respect and I got to move on.

Playing hard to get may work on some guys but for guys who got self worth and got a lot going on life.....they move on.

The woman got asked, she said no and I haven't got a court order over my head because I didn't take no as...no.

That's why.

Guys, you don't need a drama queen and run away from friend zone with this advice.

Culled from Quora.

PERSISTENCE REALLY WORKS,,,,BUT THAT'S IF THE GIRLS IN QUESTION] WAS INITIALLY PLAYING HARD TO GET.......[ I DON'T GO NEAR GIRLS BECAUSE OF THIS PLAYING HARD TO GET OF A THING......IT PISSES ME OFF BIG TIME.............

ronald4lif:
Nicely written. I don't have a problem with a woman playing hard to get, infact I want them to protract a bit as it makes me feel more appreciative of them. But when she says she's got a boyfriend, whether true or false, I bow out and save myself from the stress.

If she had said she's not interested in an affair or that she's devoting her time on something else then I can press further until I have my way.

But to dismiss the importance of playing hard to get entirely doesn't portend well. It would more often than not makes a woman appears ignoble. Except in cases, where you have been friends for a while that it's understandable if she succumb without the initial gragra. But if not, let her no persist for a while. Ba wahala.

yeah....couldn't agree more with u...if she says i have bf...fiam i take off lyk an aircraft frm sambisa

ronald4lif:
Nicely written. I don't have a problem with a woman playing hard to get, infact I want them to protract a bit as it makes me feel more appreciative of them. But when she says she's got a boyfriend, whether true or false, I bow out and save myself from the stress.

If she had said she's not interested in an affair or that she's devoting her time on something else then I can press further until I have my way.

But to dismiss the importance of playing hard to get entirely doesn't portend well. It would more often than not makes a woman appears ignoble. Except in cases, where you have been friends for a while that it's understandable if she succumb without the initial gragra. But if not, let her no persist for a while. Ba wahala.

yeah....couldn't agree more with ur post...if she says i have bf...fiam i take off lyk an aircraft frm sambisa...bt if she says she wanna focus more on her career, or dat she's nt just ready for a relationship nw...i might still stick around, bt i'd be careful nt to bug her or distract her...i'd just be moderate with way i call her, till she realises dat we can date and still remain focused

Cool like this girl are big out there no need to wast ur time on sick ones

Cool like this girl are big out there no need to wast ur time on sick ones the should hurt us not us hurting them