jelal007:
Manners.....patience......modesty. Ewww

uncjay:


Bae, u need to go start stand up comedy or something related...Lolz.......dat sinach part just dey make belle pain me.

Estharfabian:
Truth be told...

I'd never ask A guy Out!! even if my life depended on it! how degrading!! My ego won't even let me...

I'd keep giving him signs(Green, blue and yellow lights), I'd talk sweet to him, Change my voice around him, be all touchy n mushy towards him, Act overly caring, maybe call him like TWICE A month?...if he still doesn't get those Obvious/vivid Romantic signs.

He should go hang himself for all I care!!! fûck him!

Dating isn't my priority...There are plenny "Sharks" in the sea...I only have to choose from so many.....!

ronald4lif:


I thought that's pellucid and self-explanatory. Same thing you understand by 'first move' when a guy is the initiator.

Laveda:
I think this is only applied to guys who reason maturely and not some old guys with the brain of a 5year old kid...I'm talking from what I've seen

A girl asked a guy out instead of him to say he isn't interested..he took that as chance to do whatever with her...

Wildngent:


Whoever asks for exchange of contacts, addresses, a hang out spot next time, or the likes first sets the tone. That's a way of coming out at least that's how i see it. If I did the above, I came out first. She already knows i am interested in something at that point. Be okay for a Lady to muster the balls to do that but i'd prefer she built a convo leading to that and leave the dude asking. my thoughts

Oliviaarims:
This notion seems to be trending these days. But pls, before anyone goes about saying it's okay for a woman to make the first move, then perhaps they should also elaborate on what circumstances and the manner in which it should be done. So many girls are being misled already.. And making complete fools of themselves. I witnessed one such event yesterday and I just couldn't help laughing. This girl must have been feeling like a real 21st century chic when she even contemplated making the move. But with the way things turned out, I can bet on my two Di'ja-like-boobs that she's so never going to try that again. Heck, that dude was mean!


Back to my topic. I really don't get why a girl should be encouraged to make the first move. Look at it this way,

MizMyColi:

The reason most of us are against the idea of ladies approaching a man is because for aeons, our parents and those before them have been culturally imbued to think of the men as conquerors, as the pillar, the hunters, the providers, they are the backbones, are meant to do the hard jobs while the women do the softer ones....I really don't have an issue with this.

Over the years, our parents and those before them didn't seem to have an issue with it either. But our generation, being the adventurous kind and those who deliberately go after a change in the status quo have decided in their wisdom to upturn the belief.

Now here's the catch my Darlings‎

Because the scenario of mentality that I described above is still very much prevalent in our men today, it is GENERALLY not advisable to ask them out.
‎
True, I see no big deal in saying, hey, let's get to know each other more...etc - but we need to be conscious about the mentality, perspective and enlightenment level of the person we might be thinking of asking out.

As a lady, do you still have bits or bowls of ego and insecurity issues hanging around your life? If you do, please don't ask a guy out....if you both ever have an issue, your insecure mindset will tell you that he doesn't value you because "you came for him"

As a lady, do you have a level of confidence that amazes guys? If you do, then please, before asking him out, study him to find out to study if he is the kind that gets threatened by women who go all out to get what they want....if he's that kind, guide him in such a way that'll make him pop the question...that way, he'll feel more manly.

Lastly, if you are a lady who has come to understand the simplicity of life and has attained a level of enlightenment, and you happen to meet a guy who has attained such values, who for one reason or another doesn't seem forthcoming in that regard even though you know he wants you...you can spark a discussion in that direction or do sumtin little extra to show your availability.

For me though, I prefer being asked out. Not because of pride or ego...but because I want my man to lead..to be the leader, my leader...while I gladly follow


Ehennnnn
To my lovelies who are saying "he should Bleep off if he can't see a green light enough" Please sweeties...tone it down. I've been in your shoes too, and somewhere a little down the line, I found it a tad childish and proud to speak in such a way.
I apologise profusely if you feel like I'm judging you dearies. It's not intentional. I really do want the best for you all.
Hava happy year ahead‎

MizMyColi:

The reason most of us are against the idea of ladies approaching a man is because for aeons, our parents and those before them have been culturally imbued to think of the men as conquerors, as the pillar, the hunters, the providers, they are the backbones, are meant to do the hard jobs while the women do the softer ones....I really don't have an issue with this.

Over the years, our parents and those before them didn't seem to have an issue with it either. But our generation, being the adventurous kind and those who deliberately go after a change in the status quo have decided in their wisdom to upturn the belief.

Now here's the catch my Darlings‎

Because the scenario of mentality that I described above is still very much prevalent in our men today, it is GENERALLY not advisable to ask them out.
‎
True, I see no big deal in saying, hey, let's get to know each other more...etc - but we need to be conscious about the mentality, perspective and enlightenment level of the person we might be thinking of asking out.

As a lady, do you still have bits or bowls of ego and insecurity issues hanging around your life? If you do, please don't ask a guy out....if you both ever have an issue, your insecure mindset will tell you that he doesn't value you because "you came for him"

As a lady, do you have a level of confidence that amazes guys? If you do, then please, before asking him out, study him to find out to study if he is the kind that gets threatened by women who go all out to get what they want....if he's that kind, guide him in such a way that'll make him pop the question...that way, he'll feel more manly.

Lastly, if you are a lady who has come to understand the simplicity of life and has attained a level of enlightenment, and you happen to meet a guy who has attained such values, who for one reason or another doesn't seem forthcoming in that regard even though you know he wants you...you can spark a discussion in that direction or do sumtin little extra to show your availability.

For me though, I prefer being asked out. Not because of pride or ego...but because I want my man to lead..to be the leader, my leader...while I gladly follow


Ehennnnn
To my lovelies who are saying "he should Bleep off if he can't see a green light enough" Please sweeties...tone it down. I've been in your shoes too, and somewhere a little down the line, I found it a tad childish and proud to speak in such a way.
I apologise profusely if you feel like I'm judging you dearies. It's not intentional. I really do want the best for you all.
Hava happy year ahead‎

Yeah ma'am I've been waiting for your comment
Cc: Naijaboiy...

Kachisbarbie:
Some ladies expect guys to know when they are in the mood to be wooed, if they are his level or not... like he is psychic _ yet they can't do same.
Guys get turned down everyday, and they are not dead.

You don't go about approaching every random guy, those signs you expect a young man to watch out for, you should be smart enough to watch out for same signs.

Observing a guy closely (especially when you guys have established a reasonable degree of familiarity), you would notice if he is into you but has issues expressing himself probably for fear of being turned down too. That's the time to strike...

Ofatfoed:

let me say i love u for this. and you are not old-fashioned. i personally as a guy don't buy an idea that a girl should woo a guy. It's bullsh*t.

Oliviaarims:



But u can't know what I understand. I want to know urs.

TrapKNNG:
OP you are Wrong! Very wrong! Lemmie tell you why..

The last serious relationship I was in was with a wonderful wonderful lady. She practically wooed me from top to bottom, left-right and center, and I respected her for that. I grew fond of her, I agreed and we started dating but never did I look down on her for one day!! At a point in the relationship, it didn't even matter who did the wooing cos I forgot about that and took charge of my relationship like the man that I am. we had fights like every normal couple nd did all the normal stuff regardless of who wooed who.

So quit deceiving ladies out there. A guy might be shy and thus a little bit apprehensive about approaching his crush, the crush on the other hand might pick up his signal and decide to throw him a bone! Its no biggie!!

Oliviaarims:

MizMyColi:

The reason most of us are against the idea of ladies approaching a man is because for aeons, our parents and those before them have been culturally imbued to think of the men as conquerors, as the pillar, the hunters, the providers, they are the backbones, are meant to do the hard jobs while the women do the softer ones....I really don't have an issue with this.

Over the years, our parents and those before them didn't seem to have an issue with it either. But our generation, being the adventurous kind and those who deliberately go after a change in the status quo have decided in their wisdom to upturn the belief.

Now here's the catch my Darlings‎

Because the scenario of mentality that I described above is still very much prevalent in our men today, it is GENERALLY not advisable to ask them out.
‎
True, I see no big deal in saying, hey, let's get to know each other more...etc - but we need to be conscious about the mentality, perspective and enlightenment level of the person we might be thinking of asking out.

As a lady, do you still have bits or bowls of ego and insecurity issues hanging around your life? If you do, please don't ask a guy out....if you both ever have an issue, your insecure mindset will tell you that he doesn't value you because "you came for him"

As a lady, do you have a level of confidence that amazes guys? If you do, then please, before asking him out, study him to find out to study if he is the kind that gets threatened by women who go all out to get what they want....if he's that kind, guide him in such a way that'll make him pop the question...that way, he'll feel more manly.

Lastly, if you are a lady who has come to understand the simplicity of life and has attained a level of enlightenment, and you happen to meet a guy who has attained such values, who for one reason or another doesn't seem forthcoming in that regard even though you know he wants you...you can spark a discussion in that direction or do sumtin little extra to show your availability.

For me though, I prefer being asked out. Not because of pride or ego...but because I want my man to lead..to be the leader, my leader...while I gladly follow


Ehennnnn
To my lovelies who are saying "he should Bleep off if he can't see a green light enough" Please sweeties...tone it down. I've been in your shoes too, and somewhere a little down the line, I found it a tad childish and proud to speak in such a way.
I apologise profusely if you feel like I'm judging you dearies. It's not intentional. I really do want the best for you all.
Hava happy year ahead‎

naijaboiy:

Please when are you going to return fully to romance section?

Some of these girls here need schooling. I miss seeing the posts of you and mizmycoli.

Kachisbarbie:


Then it's safe to say the Nigerian factor is warped and medieval. Of course I know right, but I can only speak for myself and not the 90% of guys that abuse the love of such "bold ladies".
There is no standard on how a relationship should take off, if it works for you_ fine. If it doesn't _ life goes on... we win some, we lose some.

Oliviaarims:



Nobody's talking about being irresistible.

francizy:


Well if feminism will for once preach against ladies always waiting for men to ask them out then I'd surely support feminism fully and not partially...

Hahahahaha
My dear.
This one is not feminism o...maybe it is in in way sha.
Dunno

Oliviaarims:




Now, u're about the only person who's precisely stated what he understands by a girl making the first move. Good.

But what I meant goes beyond that.

MizMyColi:

The reason most of us are against the idea of ladies approaching a man is because for aeons, our parents and those before them have been culturally imbued to think of the men as conquerors, as the pillar, the hunters, the providers, they are the backbones, are meant to do the hard jobs while the women do the softer ones....I really don't have an issue with this.

Over the years, our parents and those before them didn't seem to have an issue with it either. But our generation, being the adventurous kind and those who deliberately go after a change in the status quo have decided in their wisdom to upturn the belief.

Now here's the catch my Darlings‎

Because the scenario of mentality that I described above is still very much prevalent in our men today, it is GENERALLY not advisable to ask them out.
‎
True, I see no big deal in saying, hey, let's get to know each other more...etc - but we need to be conscious about the mentality, perspective and enlightenment level of the person we might be thinking of asking out.

As a lady, do you still have bits or bowls of ego and insecurity issues hanging around your life? If you do, please don't ask a guy out....if you both ever have an issue, your insecure mindset will tell you that he doesn't value you because "you came for him"

As a lady, do you have a level of confidence that amazes guys? If you do, then please, before asking him out, study him to find out to study if he is the kind that gets threatened by women who go all out to get what they want....if he's that kind, guide him in such a way that'll make him pop the question...that way, he'll feel more manly.

Lastly, if you are a lady who has come to understand the simplicity of life and has attained a level of enlightenment, and you happen to meet a guy who has attained such values, who for one reason or another doesn't seem forthcoming in that regard even though you know he wants you...you can spark a discussion in that direction or do sumtin little extra to show your availability.

For me though, I prefer being asked out. Not because of pride or ego...but because I want my man to lead..to be the leader, my leader...while I gladly follow


Ehennnnn
To my lovelies who are saying "he should Bleep off if he can't see a green light enough" Please sweeties...tone it down. I've been in your shoes too, and somewhere a little down the line, I found it a tad childish and proud to speak in such a way.
I apologise profusely if you feel like I'm judging you dearies. It's not intentional. I really do want the best for you all.
Hava happy year ahead‎

MizMyColi:

Hahahahaha
My dear.
This one is not feminism o...maybe it is in in way sha.
Dunno

Laveda:
Yeah..we're all scared of being rejected...
One still needs to take the risk though

Toks2008:

Baby your black is beautiful.