I have been married for a year now to a man that is very unattractive. I married him for two reasons

1. My younger ones and friends were all married and I was desperate at 32.
2. He treats me well

He's a good husby but I sometimes get ashamed walking with him because he's very ugly. I'm a pretty girl and when we are in public he's all over me wanting people to know we are together and I see the looks they give us.

I don't mind sleeping with this man and being his wife, I just want the feeling of shame to stop.I know some men don't treat their wife well and I feel lucky mine own does that.

Ouch!.Sorry.

Stop worrying what others think. Quit being a people pleaser.

Ndo, its your cross to bear, at least you got what you wanted...marriage...

Now give him what he wants..
Be proud of him in public

You obviously don't love him yet.

The first thing you need do is, learning to love him-that will settle other things.

I wish you and your hubby the very best!

uwaezuoke

Just divorce him if your not comfortable with him. but your really a farming tool

How ugly is he? I mean is he uglier than Mr. Ibu? Be sincere.

Thaxs for the advise and kind words.I was expecting a bashing but was ready to take it so long as someone will advise me too. Its not as if I dnt love my husband its hard to not love him , but I want the shame to go. I feel the private is more important. He carries me like a princess that's why I want to give him the best too and I want to start with not being ashamed.

Be content with such things as ye have!
You have married him already so quit thinking otherwise.You are honest with reasons why you married him.Now choose to enjoy him and your marriage rather than worry about what people say.At 33yrs old,you should have learnt to care less about many things.
You should help him dress neatly and trendy and he's good to go.

If any of your kids look like him,would you begin to hide the child?

playtheblues:
How ugly is he? I mean is he uglier than Mr. Ibu? Be sincere.

haba no

1.Manage him, after all, he has cured your 'singlehood sickness'.
2.On the alternative, always wear very dark shades when with him.
3. When you are in public and you feel ashamed, refer to number 1 above.
----------- You: Why are you being nasty? Me: I am because you can't eat your cake and have it.

PunterTim:
Ouch!.Sorry.

sorry fot What ?

i feel so bad for the Husband....the most hurtful feeling in this life is to feel under appreciated....

i know we guys always complain of ladies not-so-pretty but calling a guy ugly is annoying cos this same guy you dont wanna appreciate has over 100 ladies out there wishing they could have a husband as caring as ur man..

am 100% percent sure you are not as pretty as Heidi Klum,She married Seal for years with kids... so whats ur Prob

you see lots of ladies in church praying for a Good and caring husband even if he looks like Gorrila...you have a Good and caring husband but u aint satisfy....


i pity you alot...in 10yrs time when that ur beauty is gone ,am sure by then you will be praying he doesnt leave you cos no matter how many make up u use that beauty of yours will surely fade away...

Learn to love and appreciate ur partner....Him loving you and caring for you should be more important to u than his looks...

2face and Flavor are hansome dudes but their babymamas holds pillows to sleep at night..

Learn to Love him more before someone that will appreciate him better will come along


P.S dont think he doesnt know that you dont admire him

scaredy:
I have been married for a year now to a man that is very unattractive. I married him for two reasons

1. My younger ones and friends were all married and I was desperate at 32.
2. He treats me well

He's a good husby but I sometimes get ashamed walking with him because he's very ugly. I'm a pretty girl and when we are in public he's all over me wanting people to know we are together and I see the looks they give us.

I don't mind sleeping with this man and being his wife, I just want the feeling of shame to stop.I know some men don't treat their wife well and I feel lucky mine own does that.

Dont mind how people look at you, what both of you feel for each other is what matters, must everybody marry handsome/beautiful man/woman? Answer is NO! In terms of relationship; the beauty of our heart is what matters.

OP, when Seal and Heidi Klum(dnt knw if my spellings are correct) were still married, Did u see how proud she was arnd him? She even gave birth to 3 kids for him.

Love conquer all, learn to love ur husband first with DAT he will be so handsome to u. Come to think of it, Nobody will walk up to you to tell you there looking at u bcus ur husband is ugly. It jst ur own imagination.

@op, you have a very big problem. Do you know what the problem is? the problem is "what people, friends and family think about you". Judging from your post, that led you to marry an ugly man @32. Deep down, you love him but people seems to give some kind of glare when both of you appear in public. Still yet, you are still wondering and thinking "What are people saying about my husband?" you are the problem @ scaredy. so you need to redevelop mentally and stop giving a damn about what people say or think

Hmmm lady i feel ya pain.
Talking from experience e get as e be

XD3G:
You obviously don't love him yet.

The first thing you need do is, learning to love him-that will settle other things.

I wish you and your hubby the very best!

Just my thoughts.

OP, love him. Love has a way of 'blinding' us to 'faults'.

kallmemrB:

i feel so bad for the Husband.. The most hurtful feeling in this life is to feel under appreciated..
i know we guys always complain of ladies not-so-pretty but calling a guy ugly is annoying cos this same guy you dont wanna appreciate has over 100 ladies out there wishing they could have a husband as caring as ur man..

am 100% percent sure you are not as pretty as Heidi Klum,She married Seal for years with kids... so whats ur Prob

Infact My Bro..

kallmemrB:
sorry fot What ?

i feel so bad for the Husband....the most hurtful feeling in this life is to feel under appreciated....

i know we guys always complain of ladies not-so-pretty but calling a guy ugly is annoying cos this same guy you dont wanna appreciate has over 100 ladies out there wishing they could have a husband as caring as ur man..

am 100% percent sure you are not as pretty as Heidi Klum,She married Seal for years with kids... so whats ur Prob

you see lots of ladies in church praying for a Good and caring husband even if he looks like Gorrila...you have a Good and caring husband but u aint satisfy....


i pity you alot...in 10yrs time when that ur beauty is gone ,am sure by then you will be praying he doesnt leave you cos no matter how many make up u use that beauty of yours will surely fade away...

Learn to love and appreciate ur partner....Him loving you and caring for you should be more important to u than his looks...

2face and Flavor are hansome dudes but their babymamas holds pillows to sleep at night..

Learn to Love him more before someone that will appreciate him better will come along


P.S dont think he doesnt know that you dont admire him

Don't You Think You're Overacting Here And Being Unrealistic About This!.
This Is About Her And What She Wants.Didn't Want To Advise This But Now I Must:
Think You Should Sit Down With Him And Carefully State Your Reasons To Divorce Him!

kallmemrB:
sorry fot What ?

i feel so bad for the Husband....the most hurtful feeling in this life is to feel under appreciated....

i know we guys always complain of ladies not-so-pretty but calling a guy ugly is annoying cos this same guy you dont wanna appreciate has over 100 ladies out there wishing they could have a husband as caring as ur man..

am 100% percent sure you are not as pretty as Heidi Klum,She married Seal for years with kids... so whats ur Prob

you see lots of ladies in church praying for a Good and caring husband even if he looks like Gorrila...you have a Good and caring husband but u aint satisfy....


i pity you alot...in 10yrs time when that ur beauty is gone ,am sure by then you will be praying he doesnt leave you cos no matter how many make up u use that beauty of yours will surely fade away...

Learn to love and appreciate ur partner....Him loving you and caring for you should be more important to u than his looks...

2face and Flavor are hansome dudes but their babymamas holds pillows to sleep at night..

Learn to Love him more before someone that will appreciate him better will come along


P.S dont think he doesnt know that you dont admire him

Don't You Think You're Overacting Here And Being Unrealistic About This!.
This Is About Her And What She Wants.Didn't Want To Advise This But Now I Must...
I Think You Should Sit Down With Him And Carefully State Your Reasons To Divorce Him!

Ashamed? Even if you marry a very handsome man, you'll have more worries than you have now. I bet you, even if you get married to the most handsome man on earth, the romantic love will fade away in a few years and what will be sustaining your marriage will be the content in your husband, which you are fortunate enough to have in him. If you check well, those people you said that look at you are most likely to be unmarried who are still swimming in fantasy and haven't come to reality. You really have to thank God for your husband as few men will possess the qualities you described above. To show you off to his friends and very nice to you, then he loves and respects you. If I may ask, what else does one need in a relationship? Pls get yourself to love him; it's actually a matter of choice to love. Forget about the fantasy world, married people here will bear me witness. So pls, give the guy good food, help him dress well and you see him look good.

But Mr. Ibu has a pretty wife.

scaredy:


haba no

Divorce him

Pls can I meet your husband?

Pls send me a mail with the address on my signature

Thanks in advance

Dyt:
Pls can I meet your husband?

Pls send me a mail with the address on my signature

Thanks in advance

hmm

Super story ... However 'Accept my sympathy'

Tell us the truth. Is he poor? It is only poor men that are ugly

mytime24:
hmm

I no do well?
I can manage him.for her

I'm not going to go into what this post says about you as my therapist has asked me to make this week my happy week. That is a matter for another day. For many other days actually.

We are looking for a solution here. Shame is a function of what is important to a person. It is a function of a person's values. So an adjustment in your values, in your outlook can help with that. You canteach yourself to judge a person's worth by what he does. For example, when you see any man immediately ask yourself what sort of a family man he is. Since your husband seems to be a great guy, his behaviours will begin to mean more to you over time than his looks.

You could also try to make him appear the best possible. For a man to be judged ugly by everyone, he must be stupendously ugly! Cos no matter how unpretty a man looks, if he dresses excellently with great accessories, few people look at his ...err looks. So spend time tushing him up every morning. Select great clothes and combinations for him in the mornings. Lovingly help him prepare for the day. Cordinate your outfits with his. One, he will look better and less ugly and two, you will grow to love him more.

But then if you are shallow enough to have gotten married out of desperation at THIRTY TWO for crying out loud, and are so concerned about what OTHER PEOPLE say that you are ashamed of a man you KNOW to be a good husband, then I don't know if this will help you.

There I went and did it again. My therapist will have a field day with me tomorrow. Sigh.

scaredy:
I have been married for a year now to a man that is very unattractive. I married him for two reasons

1. My younger ones and friends were all married and I was desperate at 32.
2. He treats me well

He's a good husby but I sometimes get ashamed walking with him because he's very ugly. I'm a pretty girl and when we are in public he's all over me wanting people to know we are together and I see the looks they give us.

I don't mind sleeping with this man and being his wife, I just want the feeling of shame to stop.I know some men don't treat their wife well and I feel lucky mine own does that.

I can't comprehend.

pls define ugly