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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Hilarious Fire & Thunder Church Service That I Attend Last Sunday (1369 Views)
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Hilarious Fire & Thunder Church Service That I Attend Last Sunday by funloaded: 1:48am On Jan 24, 2016 |
Most sundays, i don't go to church. Its either am with my phone or washing clothes. On this faithful day, I followed my friend to her church. The name of the church was ”Fire and Thunder *something* *something* Int'l Ministry“ I've forgot the full name of the church. What happened at the church was so different from the regular church that i always attend. It was a pentecostal church, quite small and full of mostly aged people. I was wearing a pencil skirt and normal top. As soon as I entered the church, my clothes become the center of focus. To make matters worse, we were over 1hour late. The pastor spotted us and called us to come to the front. I was like, "no no am not sitting at the front". When I heard that its the pastor that wants to talk to us, that was when i know what's up. I started fidgeting. I was even trying to explain to the ushers that am a guest but they were doing as if the pastor was Commando. With courage, I moved to the front with my friend, the congregation were just looking at us like..... Then the pastor asked me to off my earrings and that earrings are not allowed in his church. I jejely took off my earrings and looked for a place to seat. My friend has already been transferred to a seat far from me. The kind of preaching I heard, I've never heard it before, the pastor said we must not fix nails, hair attachments, no usage of gold or silver earrings, wristwatches and most annoyingly chatting is of the devil. Though I didn't concur with what the pastor was saying. The prayers we observed was like we were in a war front. The pastor said we should hold hands and pray. Unfortunately, the man that held my hand nearly removed my hand from my body while praying. At a point, I forgot the prayer point and changed my prayers to, "God, protect my hands lord, my hands are in your hands lord..." After a while, deliverance was going on.... We were clapping and singing and clapping when the pastor dashed to my front, held my head and starts shouting Fire! Fire!! Fire!!!! Fire on my head? How could that be, I just kept repeating after him "fire" wondering what's wrong with the pastor again. The pastor just pushed me hardly, I moved back and grabbed the pillar to avoid falling off. The pastor came to me again, i was now frustrated and wished i never came to his church, he grabbed my head again and starts shouting Thunder! Thunder!!... I was just hopping that Sango will not hear what the pastor was saying. Small time now, Uncle Sango will come and strike my head. I got to a point I couldn't withstand the Fire and Thunder thing again, I fell down and pretended that i had an evil spirit. When it was time for anointing service, we were asked to dip out hand into the big bowl of whatever oil they have in it and put it in our mouth.... Before anyone could force me to drink vegetable oil, my shadow was already leaving me behind, I left the church without quick notice ![]() Credits: www.funloaded.xyz
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Re: Hilarious Fire & Thunder Church Service That I Attend Last Sunday by drcleto(m): 2:56am On Jan 24, 2016 |
lmao......God safe u sha.....Nigerian churches sef |
Re: Hilarious Fire & Thunder Church Service That I Attend Last Sunday by funloaded: 10:17am On Jan 24, 2016 |
drcleto: My brother, it wasn't easy, am still looking for a better church tho... Not a church that will be shouting ”Fire, Thunder and Lightning“ every Sunday |
Re: Hilarious Fire & Thunder Church Service That I Attend Last Sunday by sinaj(f): 10:53am On Jan 24, 2016 |
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Re: Hilarious Fire & Thunder Church Service That I Attend Last Sunday by Deztro(m): 8:20am On Mar 28, 2016 |
@op next when u hear pastor saying he is angry in the spirit near door |
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