We need to know the cause of the problem before we'll be able to offer a solution. Tell us what you think is the cause an how you think we can control it. Your advice might help in saving a home from breaking apart #SayNoToDivorce

SOURCE: http://www.juicygossips.com.ng/2016/02/help-put-stop-to-divorce.html

Because married women fail to be wives nd married men fail to be husbands.

Normally, I would read this and move to the next topic but I was tempted to pause and probably say something about this deadly situation eating deep into our society. Gone are the days when people celebrate golden jubilee in the marriage. It now seems the average age our marriages now last is 10 and the society is not taking note of this decline.


Am not a socialogist but I think we are gradually creeping into individuality in Nigeria. Individuality,to me, means a situation where we live together in same room but do things separately and the only things holding us together are sex and money for family upkeep.


We started it with husband and wife having separate bedrooms and only sleep in the same room if there are needs for sex. The advent of separate rooms now creates individualism among couples and should in case there be a misunderstanding, it takes time to settle them.


That apart, I have over years studied marriages and I have noticed that we actually live in a time when patience is no longer a virtue amongst couples. We have embraced the opinion that the best way out of an issue is to walk away from it.

Feminism and several concepts are really killing us in Africa. Am not in support of men making women slaves but I think we shouldn't throw into the dustbins the fact that a man and a woman have defined roles they must play to make the family work.

Will stop here for now cos of work.

In the western world, their cause of divorce there is over-civilization but naija own is mostly due to our terrible economy. Men can't be men bcus they don't have as much as they should, women who have more than their husbands wanna be in control bcus they know what it means to have money in this hard economy and the men don't want to be controlled. Thats my view.

Because they don't know what they actually want before getting married

SELFISHNESS.

True love is driven by genuine sacrifice. If you do not inconvenience yourself to show love to your wife, then what you have may just be a sham, and vice versa.

people marry for all the wrong reasons these days. everyone is getting married because they have expectations and needs they want their spouses to fill.

what if everyone went into a relationship or marriage with the thought that they will not expect anything from their significant other but that they will do the giving and treat their spouses as they want to be treated, without expecting anything back?

I'll bet that will solve the problem.

Ioannes:
SELFISHNESS.

True love is driven by genuine sacrifice. If you do not inconvenience yourself to show love to your wife, then what you have may just be a sham, and vice versa.

people marry for all the wrong reasons these days. everyone is getting married because they have expectations and needs they want their spouses to fill.

what if everyone went into a relationship or marriage with the thought that they will not expect anything from their significant other but that they will do the giving and treat their spouses as they want to be treated, without expecting anything back?

I'll bet that will solve the problem.

hmmmm...it's a strong point you have here. I've actually gotten something from these few line. Thanks

Joe4lv:
Normally, I would read this and move to the next topic but I was tempted to pause and probably say something about this deadly situation eating deep into our society. Gone are the days when people celebrate golden jubilee in the marriage. It now seems the average age our marriages now last is 10 and the society is not taking note of this decline.


Am not a socialogist but I think we are gradually creeping into individuality in Nigeria. Individuality,to me, means a situation where we live together in same room but do things separately and the only things holding us together are sex and money for family upkeep.


We started it with husband and wife having separate bedrooms and only sleep in the same room if there are needs for sex. The advent of separate rooms now creates individualism among couples and should in case there be a misunderstanding, it takes time to settle them.


That apart, I have over years studied marriages and I have noticed that we actually live in a time when patience is no longer a virtue amongst couples. We have embraced the opinion that the best way out of an issue is to walk away from it.

Feminism and several concepts are really killing us in Africa. Am not in support of men making women slaves but I think we shouldn't throw into the dustbins the fact that a man and a woman have defined roles they must play to make the family work.

Will stop here for now cos of work.

Very well said

veeluv2015:


hmmmm...it's a strong point you have here. I've actually gotten something from these few line. Thanks

you welcome ma'am.

cruzita:
Because they don't know what they actually want before getting married

Not necessarily though

Simple, cos people marry for the wrong reason, what else again

firstking01:
Simple, cos people marry for the wrong reason, what else again

And what are the right reasons for marriage?

veeluv2015:


And what are the right reasons for marriage?

yet another simple question, you marry cos you are compatible and that you wanna fulfill purpose in life