With all due RESPECT to the writer "Toks2008" for his THOUGHTFUL and TRUTHFUL suggestion intended to lead to a SOLUTION to a SOCIETAL DYSFUNCTION killing us due to our HYPOCRISY.

In his writing titled: NO LADY SHOULD GET MARRIED IF SHE IS NOT READY FOR THIS ONE THING.

He stated clearly without ambiguity.

"POLYGAMY is the answer to the prayers of many ladies such as:

1. Many NEVER MARRIED SINGLE LADIES in the late 30s and in their 40s.

2. Many LADY DIVORCEES with children.

3. Many WIDOWS in their 30s and 40s.

Apparently it is the married men that will fancy these set of ladies MORE and ONLY A LADY IN THEIR SHOES WILL RELATE PERFECTLY TO MY STANDS AND I BELIEVE IT MAKES NO SENSE FOR A MAN TO DIVORCE AN INNOCENT WIFE BECAUSE HE DESIRES ANOTHER WOMAN." Quoting Tok2008

Very clearly stated the message he is passing to those who read to understand.

Those who are HONEST in their judgement supported his views but those who are PRETENTIOUS or can't see our WORLD'S DILEMMA became trumatized, hyper-irrationally sentimentally motivated, resulting to blockage in their God given faculty of reasoning and so the best they could do as a reaction against their INTELLECT, was rain Abuses, Insults, Curses E.T.C . Instead of profering an alternative solution to the problems of the enumerated 1, 2, 3 above or countering Toks2008's views with a supperior arguement. They exhibited exactly the CHARACTER OF THE MAJORITY.

"The MAJORITY is (mostly) never right. I tell you! That is one of these LIES in society that no FREE and INTELLIGENT man can help rebelling against. Who are those that make up the biggest proportion of the population-THE INTELLIGENT OR THE FOOLS?" Quote, Henrik Ibsen.

Was it SOLUTION SEEKING or PROBLEM COMPOUNDING that made the Eritean government to give this order to her citizens of recent. (Perhaps a hoax but let us look at the logics)

"Based on the law of God, and given the circumstances which the country is experiencing in terms of MEN SHORTAGE, the Eritrean department of Religious Affairs has decided on the following:

First that every man shall marry AT LEAST TWO women and the man who refuses to do so shall be subjected to life imprisonment with hard labour. The woman who tries to prevent her husband from marrying another wife shall be punished to life imprisonment"

WHAT CIRCUMSTANCES LED TO THE SHORTAGE OF MEN?

Shortage of men according to the Eritean Government was occasioned by casualties during the civil war with Ethopia.

Hence, there are lots of the above 1,2,3 in Eritea for example praying to God to give them Husbands in a land where there is shortage of Men............GOD IN HIS WISDOM, THE ALL KNOWING, HENCE LEFT THE DOORS OPEN TO POLYGAMY AS A SOLUTION AND A CHOICE BETWEEN MONOGAMY. Neither is it a must that everyone must get married, there are also situation that may warrant that an individual remains SINGLE but also not indulging in fornication and other illicit acts. The limitations are also very clear.

In Nigeria today, we keep producing widows and orphans everyday due to our COLLECTIVE IRRESPONSIBILIES as privileged people but VERY UNGRATEFUL inhibiting a land so blessed and rich with milk and honey. But paradoxically living in ARTIFICIAL POVERTY.

So, that was an Eritean true story above. And now is a Nigerian story.

Some months back, a very, very beautiful young lady came begging and with her little son by her side. She happens to be a widow and a run away from Maiduguri. Judging by her physical stature and eloquence and the way she was admonishing her little son trying to put him in order due to playfulness. It was too easy to understand that she is no more than a VICTIM OF FATE. An upright lady but in limbo of life.

All that she requested for from the two men seating down was N500.00. She narrated her ordel but what did these men do? The asked for a bargin. "We can give you a lot more than N500.00 even N5,000 if you agree to having sex with us. The both of us will amount to N10,000". Guess who these men are. One is a Police officer and the other is an Immigration officer...............all NIGERIANS. You can begin to understand why this country is so MESSED UP..........THERE IS NO SYMPATHY ANYWHERE EVEN AMONGS WOMEN WHO WILL NOT ALLOW THEIR HUSBANDS TO WIPE THE TEARS OF A CRYING WIDOW BY MAKING HER A SECOND WIFE.

While the patronage was going on. Their was this 'TRADER' in his shop watching and listening. A man of highly moral reputation and rich. What did he do? He called the lady into his shop, gave her and her little son cool water to drink then bought food for them to eat. They both did not know when they became conqured by sleep. After waking up, the man showed them to bathroom where the took their bath, he gave them new cloths and some money and after every now and then she and her son comes to pay him visits.

At that particular moment he had saved the woman's DIGNITY and HUMANITY too from the hands of THE MAJORITY FOOLISH PEOPLE, example the two WICKED MEN all because of LUST and SELFISHNESS. Just being STUPID!!!

After relating the story to his wife, his wife was glad to hear how kind hearted her husband is.

The story ended with the destitute becoming this 'TRADERS' second wife. He did all necessary investigations about the Maiduguri lady and medical cheeck ups.

Her one son is now going to a very good school, instead of roaming about the street ending up becoming menance to the society and his mother becoming a prostitute spreading diseases or even worse.

She is now a WIFE, a second wife if we wish to call it as so.

THIS MAN SUCCEEDED ALL BECAUSE HIS FIRST WIFE SAW IT AS AN ACT OF MOVING CLOSER TO GOD'S MERCY. Its was even her who encouraged the marriage and that is why it is advisable to always marry a woman of piety over anything else.

While marry NOT TO more than one wife is no where to be found in the Bible and the maximum is Four as encouraged in the Quran.

The same scriptures are also too clear about its stands on FORNICATION AND ADULTERY.......but most women will prefer their husband to committing these sins than doing what is lawful.

I WONDER IF THEY WILL NOT BE LOCKED UP TOGETHER IN THE FIRE OF HELL IF THEIR HUSBANDS END UP IN HELL.

I wonder if they one end up becoming infested by terminal venereal diseases.

* I am going to be writing more, subsequently because their is more to POLYGAMY than Polygamy being a prevention to a husband's cheating on his wives. There are men who have FOUR WIVES but are still CHEATS. Some even end up infecting their already four wives with HIV from the outside.

Toks2008 the simple reason why you received a lot of INSULTS is simple because the book of Proverbs 9 : 8 says.

"Do not correct a FOOL or he will hate you, correct a WISEMAN and he will appreciate you".

THERE IS MORE TO POLYGAMY THAN HAVING THE OPPORTUNITY TO HAVE LAWFUL SEX WITH MORE THAN ONE WOMEN. IT TAKES A LOT BY BEING RESPONSIBLE AND FAITHFUL JUST LIKE BEING MARRIED TO JUST ONE WOMAN.

*Still more to come, I hope.


As to those who are fond of INSULTING i pray that they dont one day have to live a life of regret.

Yawns

Longer than the Epistle Apostle Paul wrote to the church

Smellymouth:
Longer than the Epistle Apostle Paul wrote to the church

Because am a very DEEP person.

This is just beautiful, when I try to encourage people to see the deeper truths of the world, they come off to me as shallow and incapable of such.
What annoys me more, is the response of men who are serial cheats, trying to uphold monogamy under the pretext of appearing civil, liberated or intelligent while believing their lies to be true.

WORDWORLD:


THERE IS MORE TO POLYGAMY THAN HAVING THE OPPORTUNITY TO HAVE LAWFUL SEX WITH MORE THAN ONE WOMEN. IT TAKES A LOT BY BEING RESPONSIBLE AND FAITHFUL JUST LIKE BEING MARRIED TO JUST ONE WOMAN.

This is something the young ones conveniently forget, they assume that polygamy is all about the ability to sleep with more women and imagine that the responsibilities are less because they will not be committed to one woman. This type of attitude is what gives polygamy a bad name because at the end of it the resultant effects bleed into society and create more problems.

When petty boyz scream polygamy is d way you can help but laugh at "their ridiculous way of thinking" .

Bia op, na only sex dey sustain marriage You've not even thought about the responsibilies that tags along with it. Or you think you'll carry 2 or more women to ur house and start f*cking each one from now to infinity.

There's children,bills,maintenance...and all these require time and money. And in this present day economy it'll not only be unwise to follow that kind of lifestyle but foolish too. Or na the women go take care of you

Another fool.

Trash thread.

It is only Islam that Legalise polygamy.

Christianity, No! Please tell me a verse that said we are free to marry 10 women

Judaism, No!

Buddhism, No!

Even Hinduism the one freaking religion that somehow Indirectly in a way support rape STILL FROWNS at polygamy.

So anybody trying to back it up.. is a big fool to me. Marriage is not by force. Single people won't die without husband don't paint it like polygamy is their savior or something.

QueenValerie:
Exactly.
If the man ain't rich he's only heepin' onto himself more than he can handle.

Now poloyandy might fix some things ......I'm playin'

Don't let them hear you say "polyandry" o...before they come for our heads

hahhahahahaa which lady will willingly want to share her man with another lady? Sharing the D? Ka'm nukwa. Btw why marry more than one wife When you have d/f varieties out there that you can enjoy without any ring?! *borrows Usain Bolt's legs and start running* hahahahahaha

lesbiangirl:


Don't let them hear you say "polyandry" o...before they come for our heads

it's not a bad idea, some fellas might be interested so long she won't mother children for them.

QueenValerie:
they can try.....
....you caught my typo an dang! but at least you found my missin' "r"

everyone makes a typo...understanding is the key

icedbeatz:
it's not a bad idea, some fellas might be interested so long she won't mother children for them.

i doubt such fellaz exist..humans are like animals we are naturally territorial when it comes to situations like this

wasak:
This is just beautiful, when I try to encourage people to see the deeper truths of the world, they come off to me as shallow and incapable of such.
What annoys me more, is the response of men who are serial cheats, trying to uphold monogamy under the pretext of appearing civil, liberated or intelligent while believing their lies to be true.

PLEASE AND PLEASE CONTINUE TO ENCOURAGE PEOPLE TO SEE THE DEEPER TRUTH OF OUR WORLD. Dont get discouraged, as long as its the TRUTH, the whole TRUTH and nothing but the TRUTH. Teach it to the world. "Wisdom is found only in TRUTH".

"When we live in a MATERIALISTIC SOCIETY which is driven by IMAGE, CONSUMERISM and GREED, its easy to lose sight of the REAL THINGS that reflect a TRULY SUCCESSFUL LIFE."

That woman, the wife to the 'TRADER' understands the above that i just quoted. It takes alot of selflessness, understanding and TRUST to feel so relax, allow and even encourage one's husband to take a second wife. Perhaps she understands the other options too which is, he could have chosen to keep her as a mistress. but as stated. His wife is a woman of 'PIETY' and the man of a 'HIGH MORAL REPUTATION'.

So, their collective choice is a DEEP one which understood very quickly by those who are SINCERE in their judgement, such as YOU.

Thank you.

Couldn't he have helped without making her his second wife??

LordReed:


This is something the young ones conveniently forget, they assume that polygamy is all about the ability to sleep with more women and imagine that the responsibilities are less because they will not be committed to one woman. This type of attitude is what gives polygamy a bad name because at the end of it the resultant effects bleed into society and create more problems.

LordReed i am so glad that we are starting to understand one another on the LEVEL i recommended which is being 'INTELLECTUAL'.

At first read it sounded like 'PRIDE' or as you once said 'EGO'. But the TRUTH is God created all of us to be INTELLIGENT that is why we are SUPERIOR to animals. So, why ask for LESS. The IRONY and the TRUTH is that in our today's world is HUMANITY has become so DEHUMANIZED by systems and technology that we by ourselves created without putting HUMAN VALUE above the VALUE OF GOLD.

"Once we disconnect from the bullshit narratives that are forced down our throat by the mainstream media, as well as many out-dated cultural influences, we can better focus on AUTHENTICALLY LIVING IN HEALTHY, HAPPY AND HONORABLE WAYS"

I love to discuss with people who always have to think of earning their respect by respect others. And today, with your view not just because it is so TRUE but because its free of any words that will create energy wasted friction between us. I HAVE ALOT OF RESPECT FOR YOU. YOU EARNED IT!

We are all changing, we are all evolving. we are all at different stages from different back grounds, with different philosophy, with different perspectives. BUT ALL WE NEED AS HUMAN BEINGS IS THE HONEST QUEST TO UNDERSTANDING ONE ANOTHER.

Thank you very much for spending your precious time and making an HONEST CONTRIBUTION that futher teaches the world that privileges comes with alot of responsibilites.

ALL THAT THE WORLD NEEDS INORDER TO PROSPER IS SINCERITY.

The story of the TRADER is based on Kind heartedness, not on lust and on SINCERITY to marriage vows and not becoming a slave to INFEDILITY.

ONCE, AGAIN. MY REQUEST ON INTELLECTUAL DISCOURSE IS SO BECAUSE SOLUTIONS TO PROBLEMS CAN BE ARRIVED AT. WE MUST ALWAYS HAVE PRIORITIES THAT ARE OUTSTANDING.

Honestly its all about an 'INTELLIGENTSIA' on NairaLand as a priority and gratitude to God for making us Human beings and not Animals.

I hope i have tried to explaining the philosophy behind my request.

Thank you and i wish you good health and abundance of wealth and a heart that is kind.

icedbeatz:
hahhahahahaa which lady will willingly want to share her man with another lady? Sharing the D? Ka'm nukwa. Btw why marry more than one wife When you have d/f varieties out there that you can enjoy without any ring?! *borrows Usain Bolt's legs and start running* hahahahahaha

WORDWORLD you see it? This is the kind of people the idea of polygamy appeals to. Bleep with no consequences or responsibilities.

LordReed:


WORDWORLD you see it? This is the kind of people the idea of polygamy appeals to. Bleep with no consequences or responsibilities.

nigga you take everything too serious. I respect the union called marriage a lot that's why i'm still testing, observing and doing all i can to sieve the one from them all. If you happen to marry a wonderful lady that appeals to your heart, body and soul then pussyy won't be a problem bc pussi is not the foundation of the relationship and if you really love your wife like crazy the thought of hurting her won't allow you to fk around bc you can't look into her eyes without your conscience stabbing you bc of the wrong you've done to her you feel me?

icedbeatz:
nigga you take everything too serious. I respect the union called marriage a lot that's why i'm still testing, observing and doing all i can to sieve the one from them all. If you happen to marry a wonderful lady that appeals to your heart, body and soul then pussyy won't be a problem bc pussi is not the foundation of the relationship and if you really love your wife like crazy the thought of hurting her won't allow you to fk around bc you can't look into her eyes without your conscience stabbing you bc of the wrong you've done to her you feel me?

You mean seared conscience from religious tenets and moral obligation!!!

Men will worship the ground their wives walk and bang the very next pusssy that probably doesn't measure up to their wives.

It is a painful reality. The average men don't equate _fuck with love.

And ass comes shaking with a nice curve, only my religious beliefs will stop me from banging the stars out of that ass. And the love of my wife won't even be dampen one bit.

OP, you are wrong to think it's only married men, widowers, and divorcees that "apparently" seek out single mothers.

I used to think like that too until I began to actually know and see young single men getting married to single mothers and it's apparently not a new trend.

Heck, in the course of my sojourn on this earth, I've discovered quite a no of people much older than I am grew up with stepfathers, and their mothers' were the only wives of the stepdads.

QueenValerie:
He was wrong wrong wrong!!!.
An so are you!!!

Why couldn't he give an do for her as a friend?

She need not be his second wife.

My QueenValerie i hope you dont mind.

I can understand from where you are looking at the picture. I have no reason to doubt that you live in the states and that you are an American and that you are a lady and not a he pretenting to be a she.

So, you asked based a question which is typical of an AMERICAN.

1. "WHY COULDNT HE GIVE AND DO FOR HER AS A FRIEND"?

Then, you stated your choice. THE TYPICAL AMERICAN CHOICE. "She need not be the second wife".

Here is my response using the AMERICAN STORY to answer your question and to make your statement a premise not STRONG ENOUGH.

Once upon a time in the USA.

President, Mr. Bill Clinton was caught in the tenet of INFEDILITY. It was popularly known as the CLINTON-MONICA LEWINSKY AFFAIR.

A commentator did sought the opinion of the America public as to this affair by a married man, the American President and most appropriated judging by world politics, the president of the world.

Most of the American people said the same thing. "ITS PERSONAL." "LET HIM BE", "NO ONE IS PERFECT" ...............

The commentator when summing up his report said. "THE PRESIDENT IS SUPPOSE TO REPRESENT THE MORALS AND VALUES OF THE SOCIETY THAT HE LEADS". He paused and then said, "MAY BE THAT IS THE PROBLEM"

That pretty summed it up. Cliton represents the IMMORALITY and a CULTURE of *Most AMERICANS. I have asterixed *MOST. I DID NOT SAY ALL AND WHICH IS NOT FAR FROM THE TRUTH.

He is the poster-child for the greed, over indulgent American who is concerned with nothing more than SELF-GRATIFICATION. The majority of men admit without SHAME since its has become a culture, to commiting adultery and a growing number of women too. The system in the west has been described by some as a SERIAL MONOGAMY because of the INSANE DIVORCE RATE, but is in REALITY little more than a charade for an open unchecked WORSHIP OF HUMAN DESIRE.

Till date Monica Lewisky still suffer this STIGMA any where she goes in America. Clinton is still seen as a king.

IT BEATS MY FACULTY OF REASONING THAT IT IS WOMEN WHO SUFFER THE BRUNT OF ADULTERY WHICH IS COMMITED NOT BY THEM ALONE BUT BY MEN TOO. THAT IT IS WOMEN WHO ARE MOSTLY AGAINST A MAN HAVING A SECOND WIFE.

Where is the DIGNITY with Monica today? Will she be suffering the same plight if she is LAWFUL MARRIED TO CLINTON as a second wife?

The absurdity in the states have no bounds. Same sex marriage is painted in the beautiful rainbow colours.

"Even when the wind turns to a tornado it does so not by IRRATIONAL MADNESS but by a mathematically precise process."

Keeping her under his roof is a better solution than keeping her as a friend. I SAID CLEAR THAT THE TRADERS WIFE ENCOURAGED SO.

dint proof read. the credit to answering your question goes to Eric Hoffer and Sheriffa Carlo.

lezz:
You mean seared conscience from religious tenets and moral obligation!!!

Men will worship the ground their wives walk and bang the very next pusssy that properly doesn't measure up to their wives.

It is a painful reality. The average men don't equate _fuck with love.

And ass comes shaking with a nice curve, only my religious beliefs will stop me from banging the stars out if that ass. And the love of my wife won't even dampen one bit.

lol yes sire and i totally understand your stand, its is one of the hardest thing for a man to do but its not impossible atleast for a certain number of years especially when the wife is still fresh but if one has the fear of God they can do it and leave the world smacking only their wife's puna i.e from when he got married.

LordReed:


WORDWORLD you see it? This is the kind of people the idea of polygamy appeals to. Bleep with no consequences or responsibilities.

I can see and thank you.

Well even animals have SEX too, but RESPONSIBLITY is for mostly humanbeings.

So those who do otherwise know where the belong. SHOULDNT THE WORLD BECOME TIRED OF MEANINGLESS SEX?

Its obvious that his choice is not POLYGAMY hence it doesnt appeal to him. He prefers as stated by him. WHEN ONE CAN BLEEP WITHOUT RINGS IN HAND.

QueenValerie:
Wordworld that didn't make my comment weak,it stands strong.
There is still no reason for him ta take her as a second wife! None!

Well, you are free to tell us from your STAND. Your reasons why? I am here to learn as well so are alot of other humble folks here too.

Tell us why keeping her as a friend and not a second wife is better when his first wife did not disagree.

eyinjuege:
OP, you are wrong to think it's only married men, widowers, and divorcees that "apparently" seek out single mothers.

I used to think like that too until I began to actually know and see young single men getting married to single mothers and it's apparently not a new trend.

Heck, in the course of my sojourn on this earth, I've discovered quite a no of people much older than I am grew up with stepfathers, and their mothers' were the only wives of the stepdads.

Thank you for the good news. If singles too find this status of women appealing. Then what else can i say that you should become an advocated of such. The bottom line is that they are not left hanging and becoming a THORN in the flesh of our society.

WORDWORLD:


Well, you are free to tell us from your STAND. Your reasons why? I am here to learn as well so are alot of other humble folks here too.

Tell us why keeping her as a friend and not a second wife is better when his first wife did not disagree.

Tell ya in 2 whole words -its unnecessary.

QueenValerie:
Tell ya in a 2 whole words -its unnecessary.

Hence, your stand is......UNNECESSARY. You said so by yourself.

Dont forget that FRENDSHIP also leads to MARRIAGE. She used to visit him from time to time just being a caring friend until it eventually led to marrying her.