No excuse can be made for cheating. It"s NOT beyond anyone's control. It's NOT a mistake. It is a personal choice. Saying it happened because something was missing, unfulfilling or anything else is a cop out. PERIOD !

When you talk about cheating in
relationships, many people dwell in the stereotypical belief that cheating is only peculiar to men NOT women. This is a lie from the pit of hell. In case you don't know, ladies also cheat as men do just that they are very careful and smart about it since they know they are in a society where ladies are castigated, humiliated and ridiculed for cheating

Enough of my prologue. Lemme discuss the excuses given by ladies to justify cheating as a rightful act

1. Because Your Joystick is so Small

Any dude who thinks the size of a joystick is not a prerequisite or a thing of consideration before a lady dates/marries a man, is seriously sleeping on a moving Bajaj okada. Many at times, I even get scared that my own girlfriend might also be cheating on me because of the nature of my joystick. When these ladies do not derive expected intimate satisfaction from their boyfriends with a tooth-pick like joystick, they will cheat and by the time they are caught, they will say it's because the dude's joystick is nothing to write home about

2. Because You are Very Lazy in Bed

Sometime I just laugh when ladies cheat and deem their promiscuous act right, saying their boyfriends' laziness in bed actually led them to seek skillful guys who can do it better. The truth of the matter is that many of our ladies like sex as much as men do, but you will always see them pretending and hypocritical about it. Have you ever wondered why your girlfriend is nagging unnecessarily without a cause? It might just be because you are fond of climaxing barely two minutes after

3. It was the work of the Devil

We all know that Nigeria is a country where people don't take responsibility of their action or misfortunes, rather, they blame it on the devil who doesn't even know their house address or Matric No. When ladies are caught cheating, they will lie against the devil.

4. I Didn't Know what came over Me

This reminds me when my erstwhile friend caught his girlfriend cheating red-handed, she started crying profusely saying she did not know what got into her to have opened her legs for her gate man.

5. Because You are very Stingy

All the ladies I have dated in my life are always complaining that I should be given a PhD for stinginess. It is easier for a camel to go
through the eye of a needle than for me to give my girlfriend N100. One even told me that I should not be disappointed if I ever caught her cheating cos she could no longer cope dating a stingy dude who has the component Of Gehazi in the Bible

6. He Molested/ Forced Me

I don't need to explain this. We all know that an average Nigerian lady is quick to bail herself out with rape allegation the moment she's caught cheating. Some of them will seduce you and coerce you into sex and by the time they are caught they will lie that they were molested

7. Because You are also Cheating on Me

They say that two wrongs don't make a right; and I am of the opinion that the fact that your boyfriend is cheating or unfaithful to you does not mean that you should also pay him back in his own coin. Since some of them have the component of infidelity in their blood, they quickly utilize that opportunity to also cheat

8. Because You're not Financially Capable to Provide My Needs

When I check the amount of money some ladies spend on their hair, manicure and pedicure, it's even more than my house rent, school fee and project fee inclusive. However, when these ladies are dating men that lack have good financial standing, they will definitely seek other species of suitable chairmen that will provide their basic needs, and by the time they are caught cheating they will say that a relationship without finance leads to cheating

9. Because I was under the Influence of Alcohol

I just shake my head in disdain when ladies consciously bleep another dude but lie that the guy took advantage of them since they were under the influence of alcohol; therefore, they couldn't resist him.

10. Because I can't Keep all my eggs in a Basket

I don't know when men became eggs that should not be put in a basket. Some ladies are in relationships yet they flirt a lot. You will hear them saying they can't date a keep just a man because they want to be on the safe side.


Feel free to add yours

May God our eyes to choose wisely


Thanks for reading


I drop my pen at this point


Original writer: Tosyne2much

Source: http://tosyne2much..com/2016/03/10-excuses-ladies-give-when-their.html

Where is wristbangle? this is not my spot.


Modified

See oga wristbangle dey queue for my back shah igboro ti take over.

Back to the topic great piece @ op.

#It was the work of the Devil# : haba devil no see better people attack na you and your ever open fanny?


# Because He has a small Joystick# : haba See excuse i didnt choose my dick size myself na.


#Because He's Lazy in Bed# : you saw my body structure before you said yes i'm not john cena. I Dont want to take that road to heaven.


#he forced me#: this one is the funniest but he didnt force you from your father's house to his door Step.

falconey:
Where is wristbangle? this is not my spot.


Modified

See oga wristbangle dey queue for my back shah igboro ti take over.

If u steal my spot next time eh! U go hear am


Nice one doc. Tosyne2much. Oya make I add my own!

11. He is not romantic

This excuse is too lame for a lady to justify her stance on cheating on her boyfriend. If she knows that he is not romantic enough, why can't she help out by giving him tips on how he can rock her world. Just that some guys are just too stiff to understand that been romantic is not about sex. Take for example, when you say sweet words to her, play with her hair, kiss her forehead, curdle her toes, even loosening her hairs atimes (I know some guys will punch my head 4 saying this). The things can make a lady lost in his loving arms.

Just when I thought FTC is sure for me... if I catch those two guys above me eh. Wristbangle losing the FTC to sharper guys since 2016. Hustle harder bro

Let me try arrange the meaning of these excuses
If na no 1, omo your own don finish be that oo.
If na no 2, I think flexherbal can proffer solution.
If na no 3,4 and 9, just breakup with the babe joor. Her case dey village
If na no 5, pele , na so you go just dey look her in 4D, dey regret all the shopping, and how she nearly finish your salary
If na no 6, then she must be related to Lie Mohammed
If na no 7, just count am 1-1, karma no be today matter
If na no 8, upgrade your hustle, and make sure you dey sing ''One day, One day'' or ''Oluwa answer my call''
If na no 10, na em be say, you fit no be basket number 13 self. Just ask her which basket number you are. You could be basket 6 or 7 if you are lucky enough sha



where Lalasticlala and Mynd44 self? Make una come tell us wetin una girlfriends tell una the last you cought them

hm

E get wetin my people dey talk ''oburo Jersey na-agba...system na-agba''.. Even if you get small Joystick like Wande Coal or long Joystick like Tuface or Lalasticlala and you no sabi use am, all na wash. I get mini size joystick but b4 enter field to play match, i go dey touch line make sure say I use my tongue and my finger give her ultimate satisfaction. When I finally enter field dey play match, my brother na only cry and moaning u go dey hear.. Thats why I dey play Jagaban anytime I dey bang make my compound people no hear noise..




Nairaland official comedian

Hmm...

Op you forget the ''I mistakenly fell on him, i swear, truth to God'' or ''its not me o, he was the one who drag me and fell on me''

kikiki Lol lord save us

top 10 master I hail ooo....

All correct

and because they are promiscuous

The most annoying is baby it is not what you think. Who dah Bleep! told you what I was thinking you?

.

Kondomatic:
The most annoying is baby it is not what you think. Who dah Bleep! told you what I was thinking you?

hahahahahahahaha
na wetin dat our formal gf said when i asked her about u

The i don't know what came over me syndrome

Its like op has been cheated on so many times to know all these excuses

*Make i spread my mat and sit down here* waiting for a Counter Thread.

Honey, it's not what you think it is..

As E dey hot....
Still on the woman matter...

funnynation:

hahahahahahahaha
na wetin dat our formal gf said when i asked her about u

This guy won't kill me with laugh...... But it isn't what you think to be honest.

Those hoes aint loyal. even if u have money, dick and time, a hoe will always be a hoe. They can't help it

11) It will not happen again
i always laugh when i hear ladies make this statement...you never survive this one you are giving yourself hope for a second chance...by the way it is very obvious cheaters can lie for the universe so they cannot be believed

12) He seduced me: bwaaahahahahahahahaha...this one funny gan..since when did guys start seducimg ladies and even if he did...they already had it in mind to do before and so when he took the first step they go just concur and start blaming the guy

LADIES REPENT O.

k

I wanted to tell you. I showed you signs. We r no longer compatible

I'll be back

vizkiz:
the way we are bashing women on nairaland nowadays... I come dey Pity them

The Whores and 'Girls' are the ones Being Bashed. Not the Women.

@op, why you sef dey stingy, you com still get small duck dick? You no try at all

Adaure4ever:
*Make i spread my mat and sit down here*
waiting for a Counter Thread.

sweetie it wont come...there aint enough smart ladies on NL to put guys on their toes...well except you want to make an exception

Slimzjoe:

The Whores and 'Girls' are the ones Being Bashed. Not the Women.

barman.....give this man 2 kegs of palm wine...bills on me mehn..

Baba your head is there...you will live long

Indeed

matingo:
@op, why you sef dey stingy, you com still get small duck dick? You no try at all

You don't have to blame me

This guy and is endless list again.