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Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? - Romance (5) - Nairaland

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Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by demolinka(m): 11:17am On Mar 23, 2016
Omo na true dem talk say d stigma kills faster than the virus! Nairaland niggaz nor just get any chill cheesy We've got to intensify the fight against stigmatization of peeps with HIV, it's not a death sentence. Bro I feel ur pain but try get as much info as u can about the disease as it will help guide u in ur subsequent decisions. Above all show d girl kindness and love if she really is positive, u don't necessarily have to marry her unless u r convinced beyond doubts. All eyes open.
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by Chukky86: 11:18am On Mar 23, 2016
Please do not trust anyone... Most especially Ladies.. Dony be deceive by saying maybe she got cut by sharp object. Only her knows whats up. Girls can Lie just to look innocent. 70% of hiv+ got it unprotected sex. The only reason you still sticking with her... It because you pity her. With time you distances yourself. Please do not promise marrige. The best thing you can do is let her realise life goes on and it doesn't change anything.. She will take time to adjust.
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by Nobody: 11:18am On Mar 23, 2016
What is "normal" death? Lol. Even dying in one's sleep or just resting in a sofa to die isn't by any way "normal".....

missbronze:
I am not HIV positive, but, if I happen to fall in love with a HIV positive man, believe me, I will gladly marry him.

I have seen plenty positive peeps getting married to negative peeps, they all have kids and live normally as couples.


It is not a death sentence. There are more deadly diseases that can kill within two weeks, Not HIV. What's the guarantee that we that are negative will live longer than them that are positive.?
Death will surely come for everyone, and, it can come in any form, be it HIV oo, Hepatatis oo, cancer oo, Kidney failure oo, or even normal death.



But, just like someone said before, don't make promises yet, at least not now. you are not emotionally stable now. Don't do anything out of pity.
Let your decision be based on what you really want, what you feel and what you can accept.

Take your time to understand the situation, talk to your doctor to enlighten about HIV. then, imagine your life without your fiance. Remember your love for her, and, her love for you too.


Then, take your decision.
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by ganeyolowo1: 11:19am On Mar 23, 2016
To fall in love is nt hard but opt out is very difficult if u had fall in love wt her pray to God to separate u cuz u can't marry her,but it's jst a matter of tym
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by ozimec(m): 11:20am On Mar 23, 2016
iSellUsedCars:
Fellow Nairalanders, my 22yr old fiance who came to my place just a day ago got a call from her family doctor that her attention was urgently needed prior to some tests that were conducted on her 2 days back. I had to tell her to go see her doctor immediately as it could be something very important, so she left.

She calls me up some hours later to tell me her doctor says she's HIV positive. My head spun and I started thinking of where I must had gotten it from! We've been intimately together for 4years, and we make love as often as we feel like although our busy schedule hasn't made us see for up to a month now.

As I got the news, I felt so restless and just had to go join her at the hospital so they could carry a test to confirm my status. It came out negative. I promised her to always be by her side and wouldn't leave her cos of the disease. I trust her a lot and I believe she must have contracted it through sharp objects her makeup business exposes her to like razor blades.

Dear nairalanders, I need your advice. It's 3am in the morning, and she's called thrice already; she's depressed and suicidal right now. Pls air your matured and helpful opinion. God bless you.


All hope is not lost. God can do it free of charge if she is willing. Just call me or add my to your Wasap let's talk. I give you 100% assurance and it won't cost you a dime. 08064156265
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by madgoat(m): 11:22am On Mar 23, 2016
baebae:
1. Run
2. Do thanksgiving in your church
3. Do not marry this girl for any reason at all. Because you will live a life of regret..
You are the perfect example of a girl with fish brain
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by 3rdlegxxx(m): 11:22am On Mar 23, 2016
AsYouSaid:

It's fresh, she'll probably need only antibiotics as simple as septrin and she'll never suffer any setback as having contracted the disease. Counselling and care is free at Lagos General Hospitals. Her CD4 count should be probably high, she can leave a normal live, bear children and wouldn't be a transmitter. Meet me up at Ijede Health Centre, Ikorodu or relate well with your doctor.

Finally a health practitioner, I watched a program me two months back on TVC Lagos or was it channels, can't quite remember but it was about a Ghanaian lady who got HIV through a suitor while she was younger, I think in her teens and he used to come to her school and all that, anyways he had the virus and wanted to spread, he got in in her after succeeding with 2 other ladies, now the point is, in the real life story about her life, she got the retroviral drugs and it made her lead a normal sickness free life but at the end of the programme she mentioned recently when she does her hiv tests, it comes off as negative, so presently she is negative, I thought that wasn't possible but looking at her on National TV and she has had to travel the world speaking of her stories, meeting school girls, meting health organizations and she is somewhat of a popular person now with a celeb status and she is very happy as her life started with getting hiv while being a nobody to now being free of it after years and again she is married with kids and none of her kids and husband have the virus, pls educate us more on this as I thought the disease had no cure and that won't have been possible so how is her case different.

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Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by Nobody: 11:23am On Mar 23, 2016
Snipes009:
What is "normal" death? Lol. Even dying in one's sleep or just resting in a sofa to die isn't by any way "normal".....

Hehehehe.

Oh, forgive me dear. I thought is normal ooo.
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by Osgilliat(m): 11:23am On Mar 23, 2016
sben2308:
Am still lost cuz how could she and u not have wen u been intimate .I suggest u go to another clinic for test cuz there maybe a mix up along d way .It may be d doctor or nurse mistake .

It is much easier for female to contact the virus than male. The theory behind it is that the virus can only surface during intercourse for the male to contact it when the woman releases her ****. Except if there has been a cut or something in both partners private parts then it is easily transmitted to male. Whereas for a woman to contact the virus all what it takes is an eruption into the woman kitty cat and the damage is done.
Only male that practices anal s*x can contact the virus easily because the virus can be found at the wall of the anus in a bountiful amounts.. I'm not a medical student, this is my layman explanation and I stand to be corrected.
My advice to then is to always make sure she start her retroviral treatment or something as quickly as possible.. This doesn't mean that you can't have s*x without protection. She just have to make sure that the trace of the virus is at minimal level. Good luck to both of you.
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by crispberry(f): 11:25am On Mar 23, 2016
iSellUsedCars:
Fellow Nairalanders, my 22yr old fiance who came to my place just a day ago got a call from her family doctor that her attention was urgently needed prior to some tests that were conducted on her 2 days back. I had to tell her to go see her doctor immediately as it could be something very important, so she left.

She calls me up some hours later to tell me her doctor says she's HIV positive. My head spun and I started thinking of where I must had gotten it from! We've been intimately together for 4years, and we make love as often as we feel like although our busy schedule hasn't made us see for up to a month now.

As I got the news, I felt so restless and just had to go join her at the hospital so they could carry a test to confirm my status. It came out negative. I promised her to always be by her side and wouldn't leave her cos of the disease. I trust her a lot and I believe she must have contracted it through sharp objects her makeup business exposes her to like razor blades.

Dear nairalanders, I need your advice. It's 3am in the morning, and she's called thrice already; she's depressed and suicidal right now. Pls air your matured and helpful opinion. God bless you.


HIV tests are not 100% accurate. Pls tell her to go run the test elsewhere. There are cases of false positive results.
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by proffour(m): 11:25am On Mar 23, 2016
IT IS POSSIBLE THAT A GUY SHOULD HAD SEX WIT LADY LIVIN WIT HIV WITHOUT PROTECTION AND THE GUY WILL NOT CONTACT IT. BUT IF IS OTHER WAY ROUND THE LADY WILL NOT ESCAPE IT. COS I'VE WITH TWO CASES THAT TWO LADIES ARE POSITIVE AND THE THERE PRESENT BOYFRIEND ARE NEGATIVE.
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by Lexusgs430: 11:26am On Mar 23, 2016
HRich:
We are saying the same thing. I don't know the position of which you want him to wear a condom before asking to know what is truth.

In my original reply, I put a full stop at the end of the response.
On the second paragraph, asked him to wear a condom!!! He still loves her and might be tempted not to wear a condom, when they get down or up.
I hope with this few words of mine, I have managed to convincingly convince you and not confuse you that, 'wear a condom means 3rd leg application'.
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by ozimec(m): 11:26am On Mar 23, 2016
iSellUsedCars:
Fellow Nairalanders, my 22yr old fiance who came to my place just a day ago got a call from her family doctor that her attention was urgently needed prior to some tests that were conducted on her 2 days back. I had to tell her to go see her doctor immediately as it could be something very important, so she left.

She calls me up some hours later to tell me her doctor says she's HIV positive. My head spun and I started thinking of where I must had gotten it from! We've been intimately together for 4years, and we make love as often as we feel like although our busy schedule hasn't made us see for up to a month now.

As I got the news, I felt so restless and just had to go join her at the hospital so they could carry a test to confirm my status. It came out negative. I promised her to always be by her side and wouldn't leave her cos of the disease. I trust her a lot and I believe she must have contracted it through sharp objects her makeup business exposes her to like razor blades.

Dear nairalanders, I need your advice. It's 3am in the morning, and she's called thrice already; she's depressed and suicidal right now. Pls air your matured and helpful opinion. God bless you.



All hope is not lost. God can do it free of charge if she is willing. Just call me or add my to your Wasap let's talk. I give you 100% assurance and it won't cost you a dime. 08064156265
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by Nobody: 11:27am On Mar 23, 2016
you guys have been intimate, she has hiv and you dont? Sounds fishy to me, go and do the test in three different hospitals o before you conclude and those quack doctors in some hospitals give wrong results at times, I've done genotype test before and was told am ss, i laughed my ass out when i saw the result before i went and do it in a general hospital, so dp the test somewhere else first, if you do the test and you're lucky you don't have, then be careful from now on maybe it's God giving you a second chance, and as for your fiancee dont desert her just be a comforting and understanding friend to her thats what she needs most now and let her start taking the drugs now, shes lucky she discovered it very early before she starts having signs, MOST OF ALL GUY REPENT, THERE WON'T BE A NEXT TIME FOR YOU

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Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by mohisd(m): 11:27am On Mar 23, 2016
baebae:
1. Run
2. Do thanksgiving in your church
3. Do not marry this girl for any reason at all. Because you will live a life of regret..
. Babe put your self in her shoes, u just de run mouth any how..
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by zubby55(m): 11:27am On Mar 23, 2016
They are discodant couple
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by 3rdlegxxx(m): 11:28am On Mar 23, 2016
amagunnerfan:
You sure this is not a case of false positive? My fiancee ( now wife ) was tested positive for a sexually transmittable disease and I was tested negative even though we made love not less than 10 times within the 3 months preceding the test. We had a redo and it turned out to be what the doctor termed false positive.

It was an issue that almost broke us if not for the fatherly advise of the doctor who is like a father to me. Order a redo in another clinic please.

Very mature advice....
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by Nobody: 11:28am On Mar 23, 2016
SirAweezy:
In as much as she needs you right now... Stop giving her hope for marriage, don't say anything just be neutral, it's a phase it will pass on its own.

He should as well go to another hospital for another test.if still negative,he should just be neutral for sometime and allow the relationship die a natural death and hitherto try to relocate to marry-
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by HRich(m): 11:32am On Mar 23, 2016
Lexusgs430:


In my original reply, I put a full stop at the end of the response.
On the second paragraph, asked him to wear a condom!!! He still loves her and might be tempted not to wear a condom, when they get down or up.
I hope with this few words of mine, I have managed to convincingly convince you and not confuse you that, 'wear a condom means 3rd leg application'.
I refuse to be confused.
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by aeronot(m): 11:33am On Mar 23, 2016
There is fire on the mountain... Run, run, run, run....
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by Lexusgs430: 11:34am On Mar 23, 2016
HRich:
I refuse to be confused.

Oga, e be like say you love to argue. Make we meet for beer parlour to continue this and other arguments.
NB: Drinks, Babes and point & kill, all on you!!!!!
Don't 4get condoms (I love the fruity flavoured variety)
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by 3rdlegxxx(m): 11:34am On Mar 23, 2016
MadCow1:



Run My Nigga!! Run!



Drop her like shes hot and run..



Fhuck love, fhuck caring, fhuck all that other soft mushy bullshiit..

RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!

if you cant run, get into a Car and drive like you were auditioning for Fast & Furious.

Change your phone number, quit your job, move to a new state, get a new name and identity and lay low for the next 5 years.



HIV no be children something o!


lol, it's usually guys like you that would woo a girl with the best lines, promised heaven and earth, compare her to the sun, tell her you love her till death and all those very sweet head swelling words angry, na still ur type go hear hiv run forget phone, forget wallet, forget house key and car keys, lols some guys ernn guy understand the virus 1st, check if you are clean, if you loved her to start wit hand you are sure she also loved you dearly, stay by her for now until things become clearer then decide, which one be run, run ruuunnn she be suicide bomber wey one explode under 5 minutes ni ... grin grin grin
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by Nobody: 11:35am On Mar 23, 2016
bayulll011:


Best advice so far,if truly the girl is not a cheat and contracted it through sharp object,I see no reason why the girl to should be sentenced to life of injustice,those girls now adays are not to be trusted,u are the only matured lady that knows more about relationships,not all these kids on NL that cannot wash their pants or construct single sentence without grammatical blunder.nice one your fellower just increased by one
my dear, you don't blame them. I use to be ignorant before oo. Not, until I start working in a hospital and also got knowledge about it.


We try to educate people is not that bad. For eg, I lost my kid sister to two weeks illness of hepatatitis, just like a play she fell Ill and within two weeks of one hospital to another, she died.


Had it been it was HIV that she got, believe me, she will still be alive today, all she needs is not her drugs? she will even be living her normal life.



That's why I said there are deadlier diseases that kills fast than HIV.

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Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by ricki: 11:35am On Mar 23, 2016
Tell him he is not HIV fucking positive because it is a scam....
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by Mikky007: 11:38am On Mar 23, 2016
The truth is it is very possible to be intimate with someone that is HIV possible and the partner would not be positive. Medicine has showed us that some couples have had such result where one is positive and the other is negative so its not new to those of us in the medical line. Also, having this virus is not a death sentence as some people believe,people not can leave a normal live and even give birth to a negative baby so long as you follow your doctors advice. Although science is ever evolving so you dont know what might happen the next minute 'cos I no the drugs for its cure will soon be out. Also there are many drugs and food supplement these days that can assist built a strong immunity to even sustain till death so information is power so dont be afraid, if you love you fiancee that much then you need stand by her as both of you can bear healthy fruits and live a healthy life following your medical care expert.
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by ricki: 11:38am On Mar 23, 2016
Tell him he is not HIV fucking positive because it is a scam.... dere are oda things he should be worried about hepatitis , std etc.

That doctor is looking for mugu soon to be maga.

One oda important thing is dat make he doesn't take any drugs dat doctor gave him/prescribe unless the doctor can use it 1st..
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by 3rdlegxxx(m): 11:41am On Mar 23, 2016
obailala:
This is a very precarious situation, but like my doctor friend would always say, "it is only poor people that die of HIV/AIDS." Any comfortable person who can afford to feed well doesn't have a problem. HIV/AIDS has since been conquered and is technically not a killer disease any more.

My guy, a lot of people don't know this, the level of exposure and sense of being informative by most Nigerians really baffle me, in 2016 a lot still think of hiv like cancer or compare it to a suicide bomber about to set off, this thread is an eye opener so all this people that I notice commenting on all this thread all the time, this is how informed they really are, wow! it only goes to show that a lot of Nigerians don't read, listen to the news or follow important health news but love to stay online, listen to music and watch movies, someone even still thinks hiv and aids means the same thing, that was a killer punch, I knew as far back as 7 years ago that hiv was just the initial stage and with the right drugs it can be slowed down and its impact on the immune system greatly reduced hence the infected person can still lead normal lives while aids is the killer disease that's incurable T LEAST BACK THEM, NOW THINGS MUST HAVE CHANGED, WE ARE SO NOT INFORMED IN NAIJA, it's the bitter truth, we don't educate ourselves, we just go to school come out and get a job, stay on social media follow and comments but not really learning much.

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Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by ireneony(f): 11:42am On Mar 23, 2016
I dont know why HIV is so rampant in subsahara Africa undecided the chance of getting hiv in europe is relatively low.
With the little time I have lived here, I have never come across hiv advert on tv the way it is publicised in Africa. The truth is black men like having multiple partners.
The reason hiv is high in africa is; for example a Nigerian man keeps many sexual partners and he continues to sleep with them at the same time or period without protection, the chances of him to spread and contract the virus is very high. Now, a white man can sleep with different women without condoms but he only sleep with them once and move to the next person, so the chance of him infecting and contracting is low. The truth is white and east asians are faithful to theirs partners that's why there is no hiv epidemic there like the way it is in africa.

this is just my theory#
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by imoowo(m): 11:45am On Mar 23, 2016
what is viral load
SirAweezy:


Nice one! I pray you won't change your mind.... I commend your spirit I must say!
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by Nobody: 11:47am On Mar 23, 2016
Yeah...highly unlikely. Except she's a drug fiend who share syringes. Now as per the op not contracting it is very possible too. Highly likely. Cos the rate and risk of female to male transmission is low....especially if op is circumcised and doesn't do anal plays...


Kgdavid:


Actually unless you are actively using a blade to cut someone and then immediately cutting yourself, infection from sharp objects other than needles is highly unlikely. Highly. So that is just a story and she needs to tell the man the honest truth. HIV infection does not occur that easily.

HIV at the age of 22 tho?? dang!
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by FarukuWadata12(m): 11:49am On Mar 23, 2016
What if she was just texting your loyalty, because I don't think she could tell you directly that she was consumed with HIV. Try to calm her down and let her know you are still loving her and wouldn't stop until you die
Re: Help! My Fiance Is HIV Positive, I'm Not; What Do I Do? by menix(m): 11:49am On Mar 23, 2016
Totfulguy:


He asked for mature advice. Not silly ranting.

Why do families with inborn silliness quick to suspect others

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