Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Mentcee(m): 12:27am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Agubushmenyo:
Ke way gi... Lol..!!
Na we we na!!
E wota go??![wink](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/wink.png) Nwanne, akpa gi dia! 1 Like |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by whytetyre: 3:11am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Agubushmenyo:
We had a deal with Buhari for 4years!!
Don't start writing poo just after 1year... If 2019 comes, and you don't like Buhari, present your Candidate!!
We will meet at the polls!!
For now, remain quiet and Observe!! Baba is having a meeting with Obama!! Don't make noise!! Waiting till election time is the mark of complete lack of wisdom which will destroy Nigeria. For saying that we should be quiet shows the type of person you are. 8 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by arabbunkum: 4:41am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Quite expository. 'When the budget fails, blame it on Jonathan'. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by blackpanda: 4:56am On Apr 03, 2016 |
You will soon hear that aribisala is one of the benefactors of dasukigate. The guy always stands for anything negative or that has to do with corruption. Femi Aribisala should be ashamed of himself! 4 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by otukpo(f): 6:01am On Apr 03, 2016 |
The truth will always remain the truth.
GEJ made a lot of progress in his one year in office compared to what we are seeing today. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Babacele: 6:16am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Blackfire: PDP are thieves we are managing, but this APC are con artist+armed robbers who are terrorising us.
Insult me, and watch your blessing in life evaporate like 'APC promised 5k' n if at d end of d day , Nigerian youths get more than 5 k, primary school kids even get a meal a day, n there are more jobs while money is saved from PDP's looting e no go b..... for u ,say amen. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by futurenix(m): 6:20am On Apr 03, 2016 |
I don't think you understand what such blunders does to the image of your giant of Africa. Take your time to think about it. The president ruling over 150M people with a large number of professors, uncountable number of good PhD holders, millions of sound Masters degree holders not to mention the first degrees. If someone heading these group of intellectuals can make such blunders internationally not even knowing the party name that brought him to power then those intellectuals in Nigeria are just imagination and if they posses any physical certificate it should be withdrawn or better still not leave the shores of Nigeria. Of all the presidents, that of Nigeria made the highest number of YouTube fun list. Those personal aides of PMB are either illiterates or the President wants to be a comedian like mama patience. Don't be blind and fail to uphold your moral obligations. Call white, white and black, black. Goke7: Aribisala is beginning to sound petty, of what relevance is the grammatical blunders of PMB to the issues at hand. Common, this is pure bitterness against the person of PMB.
What remains is for aribisala to call nigeria a zoo so my se brothers can rejoice 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by futurenix(m): 6:34am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Don't you think if he is one of such benefactors he would be aligning with them like some have been doing and not poking the bee hive. You should be commending such people who have the courage and means of making criticism circulate round the nation. Yours probably will end here on nairaland but his make waves and that's a good thing. If everyone criticizing this government will keep mute, you will wake up one day and some strange fellow will tell you he owns your wife and your father's house now and you can't do shit about it. Such criticism keeps the ruling party in check so embrace it and wrong those you morally feel is not worth it but commend and see how you can propagate the ones that can help this country. blackpanda: You will soon hear that aribisala is one of the benefactors of dasukigate. The guy always stands for anything negative or that has to do with corruption. Femi Aribisala should be ashamed of himself! 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Babacele: 6:45am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Mamog:
On diversifying the economy what is PMB's plan On improving power. What is PMB's plan On employment generation what is PMB's plan On improved infrastructure what is PMB's plan Please no speculation state the obvious plan. I know u will struggle to name any plan and that is the problem. Nigerians are aware that PMB has a four year mandate out of which 10 months is gone already the issue is we don't want anybody to take us for a ride.. it is better to booth this government out now if the signs are that they will take us backward instead of giving them the freedom to destroy our collective future. Do you wait till cancer is full blown before you commence treatment or you commence treatment at the earliest stage? and while your hypocritical self feign ignorance of PMB's achievement in less than a year, I bring to global notice the following so that u can be assessed: 1. Security is the most important factor in any development plant. in less than a year PMB has won the war on Security especially the Bokharam which d GEJ administration pampered for 6 years. 2. Corruption is now being properly tackled ,n now stealing is now corruption u like GEJ who openly supported it. Presidend Buhari knows that corruption is inimical to any growth n resource distribution among citizens hence we Nigerians who voted for him are not disappointed by his anti corruption approach so far. Several members of the last administration and previous governments are returning looted public funds;while some are facing prosecution. 3. investors now have confidence in the nation and are already coming in to invest. 4.Several youths eg corp members are getting agric loans up to N2m each for agribusiness. go ask Bank of Industry 5. in few weeks time about 10million primary school pupils would be served a free meal daily with chains of jobs attached to it. 6. There is a serious and sincere plan by the government to unleash our potential in d mining business -a multi billion dollar sector. so far about N500m have been made from license registration n renewal alone. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Nobody: 6:46am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Agubushmenyo:
I don't wana make them Ban you for calling me a fool!!
But next time, if you don't like what I post, read my signature and know what to do!!
Thanks!! Painfully so, there wasn't any better word to qualify your stupidity. To go jail na normal thing for Niaja now nah. Bans are not forever. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Nobody: 6:51am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Agubushmenyo:
We didn't distirb GEJ after the protest of dubsidy removal...
We allowed him finish his tenure, then we told him our mind during elections!!
So quit Ranting and wait till 2019!! Present you "Super" candidate and let's see how it goes!!
Till then....![](/faces/huh.png)
Keep Observing!!
Baba is in a Meeting You obviously don't live here. Opposition never allowed Jonathan breath one day. Gej does something right, he is clueless, he does something wrong, he is a retard, he does nothing, he is the son of drunken fisherman. Those were the narrative of the opposition in all media platforms. So remain calm and enjoy your slice of the pie. 1 Like |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by blackpanda: 7:02am On Apr 03, 2016 |
futurenix: Don't you think if he is one of such benefactors he would be aligning with them like some have been doing and not poking the bee hive.
You should be commending such people who have the courage and means of making criticism circulate round the nation. Yours probably will end here on nairaland but his make waves and that's a good thing.
If everyone criticizing this government will keep mute, you will wake up one day and some strange fellow will tell you he owns your wife and your father's house now and you can't do shit about it.
Such criticism keeps the ruling party in check so embrace it and wrong those you morally feel is not worth it but commend and see how you can propagate the ones that can help this country.
This is not criticism but trash talk. Aribisala is a nonentity! 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Nobody: 7:15am On Apr 03, 2016 |
3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by tuniski: 7:39am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Babacele: n if at d end of d day , Nigerian youths get more than 5 k, primary school kids even get a meal a day, n there are more jobs while money is saved from PDP's looting e no go b..... for u ,say amen. Let those things happen not what we are facing. Right now. A futuristic promise of eldarado is cheap reality is different. Chanji is a scam! |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by otokx(m): 8:10am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Goke7: Aribisala is beginning to sound petty, of what relevance is the grammatical blunders of PMB to the issues at hand. Common, this is pure bitterness against the person of PMB.
What remains is for aribisala to call nigeria a zoo so my se brothers can rejoice Femi Aribisala as a human being has his bad days, this article was poorly done. |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Mentcee(m): 9:53am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Why this thread hasn't got the front page is very confounding. Lalasticlala... |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Mamog(m): 10:02am On Apr 03, 2016 |
Babacele: and while your hypocritical self feign ignorance of PMB's achievement in less than a year, I bring to global notice the following so that u can be assessed: 1. Security is the most important factor in any development plant. in less than a year PMB has won the war on Security especially the Bokharam which d GEJ administration pampered for 6 years. 2. Corruption is now being properly tackled ,n now stealing is now corruption u like GEJ who openly supported it. Presidend Buhari knows that corruption is inimical to any growth n resource distribution among citizens hence we Nigerians who voted for him are not disappointed by his anti corruption approach so far. Several members of the last administration and previous governments are returning looted public funds;while some are facing prosecution. 3. investors now have confidence in the nation and are already coming in to invest. 4.Several youths eg corp members are getting agric loans up to N2m each for agribusiness. go ask Bank of Industry 5. in few weeks time about 10million primary school pupils would be served a free meal daily with chains of jobs attached to it. 6. There is a serious and sincere plan by the government to unleash our potential in d mining business -a multi billion dollar sector. so far about N500m have been made from license registration n renewal alone. 1. Security has reduced so much that oil facilities are being short down leading to drop in revenue and power supply. 2. Corruption is wiped out now that is why CBN and top government officials are round tripping our forex. Taking from CBN at official rate and selling at the black market 3. Investors confidence has grown up that is why companies are shutting down and laying off staff on a daily basis at a rate worse than 1984 (refer to NBS) 4. Several youth got agricultural loan on what basis? Was it advertised for? How were they selected? Oh I forgot just like they employed their families in CBN and Immigration service. Nepotism and tribalism at its peak 5.10 million will be fed in 2 weeks? That is still futuristic. 6. Serious sincere plan that is hidden for 10months now? Show me was what I asked not speculation. Now we may disagree on valuation processes but it does not change the fact that this government is very insincere. Let me remind you that petrol subsidy is back.. Policy somersault is the hallmark of incompetence. If he PMB were to be my employee I would have sacked him in 3 months into his appointment. 10 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Blackfire(m): 1:39pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
Babacele: n if at d end of d day , Nigerian youths get more than 5 k, primary school kids even get a meal a day, n there are more jobs while money is saved from PDP's looting e no go b..... for u ,say amen. amen and amen... But if the reverse is the case *searching for my curse in the book of e no go better for u* |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Babacele: 2:11pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
Blackfire:
amen and amen... But if the reverse is the case *searching for my curse in the book of e no go better for u* my own na e no go baje for u, amen. |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by NavierStokes(m): 2:12pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
And how come the mods haven't put this on the FrontPage, or has the censorship of Femi Aribisala's articles by the FG been extended to Nairaland as well. This is a brilliant piece for the records, and I am on front page raCing about Linda Ikeji's smelly p***y.
Mods please do the needful. Cc: lalasticlala, OAM4J, mynd44 |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Bollinger(m): 2:47pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
"Who want's change"? Everybody and their mothers raises their hands. Then, "who want to change in order for change to happen"? All hands drop with Total silence. 1 Like |
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Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by stayblack: 2:51pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
Mentcee: In six years of Goodluck Jonathan’s presidency, the opposition told us again and again the man was “clueless.” It made sure the tag stuck to him like glue. But now we have a new sheriff in town, with the APC claiming to be better at everything than the PDP. While that might still be subject to debate, there is overwhelming evidence that in the cluelessness department, the PDP is certainly no match for the APC.
Here is a compendium from the APC textbook of cluelessness, provided within barely one year in office. If you want to know how to be a clueless president, this is the APC blueprint.
Blame Game
Instead of giving Nigerians the change you championed, give them excuses. Blame Goodluck Jonathan for everything, including the harmattan. Whenever you make a blunder, pass the buck to the former president. If there is petrol shortage, blame it on Goodluck Jonathan. If the budget is dead on arrival, blame it on Goodluck Jonathan.
In the middle of an economic crisis, promise to provide Nigerians with free education; free meals daily for millions of Nigerian public school-children; free tertiary education; free health-care and free houses. Facing a drastic drop in Nigeria’s income, declare you will be giving grants of N1.5 trillion a year to Nigeria’s poor. When you fail to deliver on any on these highfalutin promises, blame it quickly on Goodluck Jonathan.
Blunders
Forget the name of your vice-presidential running-mate. Call him Yemi Osunbade instead of Yemi Osinbajo. Tell President Obama the name of your political party is the All Nigeria’s Peoples’ Congress when it is All Progressives Congress. Call your party on CNN the All Progressives Confidence.
Tell Al Jazeera INEC means Independent Nigerian Electoral Commission instead of Independent National Electoral Commission. Even though West Germany ceased to exist in 1999 and the current German president is Joachim Gauck, refer to German Chancellor, Angela Merkel as “President Michelle of West Germany.”
Destroy INEC by turning it into a National Commission for Inconclusive Elections. Go to the United Nations and give a rousing speech about fighting Boko Haram, then fail to attend the crucial meeting on Boko Haram at the same U.N. session. Tell the Americans the Chibok girls were abducted from their “hotels” instead of their “hostels.”
Tell Nigerians there is nothing like petroleum subsidy. Then as president, announce the removal of the non-existent petroleum subsidy. Claim Jonathan diverted $700 million from the $1.1 billion Chinese loan for the Lagos/Kano rail project when only $400 million was earmarked for Lagos/Kano rail. Announce that foreign exchange can now be paid into domiciliary accounts without specifying if depositors will be allowed to withdraw them.
Anti-corruption rigmarole
Declare that you will kill corruption in Nigeria while being surrounded and bankrolled by corrupt politicians. Then invite those with corruption allegations hanging over their heads into your cabinet. Maintain: “Jonathan’s ministers stole 150 billion dollars.” But fail to prosecute them for stealing $150 billion. Tell Nigerians $2.1 billion was stolen by the PDP through Dasukigate, but charge people to court for stealing no more than $100 million.
Believe that trying members of the PDP for corruption on the pages of newspapers amounts to waging a serious war on corruption and is a substitute for national economic policy. Say: “We cannot build an economy where corruption is the working capital.” Then declare to no effect that recovered stolen monies will be used to revamp the national economy.
Insist Abacha never stole any money, and then probe the PDP for the mismanagement of the non-existent Abacha loot recovered from abroad. Fail to recognise that with the official exchange-rate at N198 to $1, while the parallel market rate is N305 to $1, you have created the widest parallel market margin ever recorded in Nigeria’s history and laid the foundation for widespread corruption in the banks.
Accuse the opposition of using public funds to finance its election campaign, but fail to disclose where you got the money to finance your own very expensive election campaign. Claim to be so cash-strapped, you had to borrow N27.5 million to pay for the presidential nomination papers of your party; then state in your assets declaration that you have N30 million in your bank account. Commend INEC for running the ostensibly free and fair election that brought you to power; then challenge in court every election conducted by the same INEC that your party lost.
Contradictions
Claim you inherited an empty treasury in spite of the over $30 billion left in our foreign reserves. Say you met no money in the treasury, then spend N2.2 billion on a four-day junket to the U.S. with no agenda and with nothing achieved.
Say: the federal government of Nigeria is: “the biggest Boko Haram.” Then become the head of the federal government of Nigeria. Declare grandiloquently: “I belong to everybody and I belong to nobody.” Then say: “The constituents (that) gave me 97% cannot in all honesty be treated on some issues with constituencies that gave me 5%.” Say you belong to everybody but ensure that your personal aides are virtually all Northerners.
Say: “I bear no ill will against anyone on past events. Nobody should fear anything from me. We are not after anyone.” “There will be no paying off old scores. The past is prologue.” Then send EFCC dogs after Elder Godsday Erubebe.
Say: “I pledge myself and the government to the rule of law, in which none shall be so above the law that they are not subject to its dictates, and none shall be so below it that they are not availed of its protection.” Then seek to replace the rule of law with the rule of fear. Go on national television and tell Nigerians you will not be obeying the courts in the cases of Dasuki and Kanu. Interfere in the judicial process by publicly declaring your enemies guilty without trial.
Tell Christiane Amanpour on CNN that you will defeat Boko Haram within two months if elected. Then say you did not say so. Declare that you will defeat Boko Haram by the end of December 2015, then say you only meant to defeat it “technically” after it unleashes mayhem on Maiduguri while you were busy celebrating its fictional defeat.
Say: “Boko Haram is a typical example of small fires causing large fires. An eccentric and unorthodox preacher with a tiny following was given posthumous fame and following by his extra judicial murder at the hands of the police.” Then send troops to massacre hundreds of Shi’ites in Zaria. Involve Nigeria in a Middle Eastern regional struggle between Saudi Arabia and Iran by joining the Saudi led anti-terrorist coalition. Open the door for wider terrorist attacks on Nigeria by killing Shi’ites in the North while the Saudis execute Shi’ite mullahs and prisoners in Saudi Arabia.
Prosecute avoidable wars on several home-fronts: against Boko Haramites in the North-east; Shi’ites in the North-west; Biafrans in the South-east; and Niger Deltans in the South-South.
Nonsensical policies
Grind the country to a halt by making yourself Sole Administrator of Nigeria for six months. Squander your vital first 100 days in office doing absolutely nothing; while receiving cheers as “Baba Go-Slow.” Present “body language” as a substitute for policy. Ensure that over N5 trillion is wiped off the Nigerian Stock Exchange within six months of your coming to office.
Promise: “I will stabilise global oil price.” Then watch as the oil price tumbles from $50 to $28 within eight months of your presidency. Also ball-watch as the naira tumbles to a record-breaking N305 to one dollar.
Declare when the country is broke: “I will provide one meal a day for children in public primary schools.” “I will make direct cash transfer of 5,000 naira to the 25 million poorest and most vulnerable citizens.” Propose through your Minister of Science Fiction to create 3.4 million jobs in Nigeria in 2016 through the production of pencils. Plan to have 365 cultural festivals 365 days a year under your Ministry of Culture.
Shout “chanji, chanji” while a large chunk of your party-members are turncoats from the same PDP that ruled the country for the last 16 years. Refer to ministers as noisemakers then establish a Cabinet of ministers. Take six months to choose a cabinet then come out with old cargoes. Tell Nigerians you delayed appointing ministers because you were looking for saints and angels, then appoint many known devils. Say: “The corrupt will not be appointed into my administration.” Then appoint those with corruption allegations hanging over their heads.
Delight in putting square pegs in round holes. Make Kayode Fayemi, who has a Ph.D. in War Studies, Minister for Solid Minerals instead of Minister of Foreign Affairs. Make Professor Anthony Anwukah, a professor of Education and a former vice-chancellor a Junior Minister to a journalist, Adamu Adamu, in the Ministry of Education. Make Solomon Dalong, a former Assistant Inspector of Prisons the Minister of Youth Affairs and Sports. Make Muhammadu Bello, who headed the National Hajj Commission for eight years, FCT Minister.
Budgeting
Propose a N6 trillion budget in 2016 for a nation that failed to meet revenue estimates of N4 trillion in 2015. Predicate this on borrowing N2.2 trillion, which requires N1.2 billion daily to service.
Benchmark your budget on the price of oil being $38 in 2016, making it dead on arrival with the oil price falling to $28 within a fortnight of your budget presentation. Fail to anticipate that, once sanctions against Iran are lifted, the oil price will go further down as Iranian oil is added to the international oil glut. Allocate N40 billion to look for oil in the North East in the middle of an oil glut when Nigeria needs to diversify from oil.
Within the framework of a drastic cut in Nigeria’s income, raise the budget for Aso Rock from N6.6 billion in 2015 to N18 billion in 2016. Earmark N3.6 billion for the purchase of several BMW saloon cars! Budget N1.75 billion for feeding in Aso Rock in 2016 when Jonathan only budgeted N530 million in 2015. Allocate only N29 billion to the Ministry of Agriculture, while earmarking N39 billion for the Ministry of Information and Culture.
Present the budget to the National Assembly without first scrutinising it. Present the budget with fanfare, then send someone to steal it from the National Assembly. Present the budget, then withdraw it after reading it. Remember this: when the budget fails, blame it on Goodluck Jonathan!
http://dailypost.ng/2016/01/27/femi-aribisala-a-compendium-of-buhari-apcs-textbook-of-cluelessness/ IS THAT ALL... ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) ...TRASH..SAI BABA 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by stayblack: 2:55pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
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Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Iyaju(m): 2:56pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
Blackfire: PDP are thieves we are managing, but this APC are con artist+armed robbers who are terrorising us.
Insult me, and watch your blessing in life evaporate like 'APC promised 5k' Amen brother |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Querty(m): 3:03pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
Even the devil is afraid of APC when it comes to telling lies...
The devil and APC are inseparable!!! |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by Suprementos(m): 3:04pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
How long does it take dis man to write this; sometimes I wonder if what this people say actually gets to him. Why don't u make it more official and direct to him. We will only catch fun with ur write up n even correct ur mistakes. Stop wasting precious times on trivial things but if it's cheap popularity, u can have one. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by LeFreakSoChic(f): 3:13pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
Agubushmenyo:
We had a deal with Buhari for 4years!!
Don't start writing poo just after 1year... If 2019 comes, and you don't like Buhari, present your Candidate!!
We will meet at the polls!!
For now, remain quiet and Observe!! Baba is having a meeting with Obama!! Don't make noise!! I love you. Never will I take an Old Goat who spells Orubebe as Erubebe serious. Dont give me that typo shii. Letter E is too far from O on the keyboard! |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by jaxxy(m): 3:16pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
Mentcee:
But was the writer wrong? Disprove him. BUHARI MAYBE MANY THINGS BUT HES NOT CLUELESS TRUST ME!!!! 1 Like |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by 2sexycom(m): 3:18pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
Agubushmenyo: Tell the writer that when he is Tired of writing, he should drop his pen and go to Bed!!
Then he should wake up in 2019, and write all these poo!!
Buhari won't resign.....!!
You don't Like Nigeria, Go to Ghana!!! it's people like that is cause of the problem we have today. Buhari has failed woefully and you should put sentiment aside and call a spade a spade. |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by LeFreakSoChic(f): 3:19pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
Iyaju: Amen brother Lazy wart.. Instead of 'amening' his stupidity, find something that'd give you more than the promised 5K. |
Re: A Compendium Of Buhari' S Cluelessness: Femi Aribisala by banio: 3:19pm On Apr 03, 2016 |
I really hope that our economy improves latest by December 2016. Otherwise Nigerians will kill PMB with curses |