seaga:


On this issue I am quite on the fence,I am just applying common logic.
But if you say tradition and culture. ...well will take that as a compliment because without it we just an individual roaming the earth without a form of identity.So yes I would gladly embrace it

Fanirandele:


Are you minding them. Nigerian women have learnt from the men how ro play the game an now they out play the men sef. Most of the guys running their mouths here will never imagine their wives are cheating. Why do you think FNA experts say many Nigerian men are not the fathers o one or more of their "kids "

Fanirandele:


Yoruba and Christian. Many Yorubas no longer collect bride price and the ones that do so collect like N5 so that it's just symbolic and they will tell you right there no one can buy their daughter

seaga:


I am also yoruba,so tell me is money the only form of payment?Now tell me were any form of items received for whatever reason if yes,that means trade by barter was the order. Unless you want to tell me there wasn't any form of exchange but given out on a platter of Gold

akike:


Some of them are just stvpid.

i agree with them

men can cheat but women have to do it secretly .
You will be nagged for cheating but the wife would continue to live in peace until she is caught with a BIG IF

Fanirandele:


I just laugh at Nigerian women. The married women in more office are most notorious than the singles ones sef the husbands will be feeling like they are the Don while their wives are quietly running things

Toks2008:


I totally second your standview but we must start learning to adjust to this fact.

look at this scenario..i have been with you for years and i have invested so much love ,time and resources then you got carried away for whatever reason and after you are found out you apologize.

Does it make sense for me to drive you out against all odds?

Except the man does not love the lady i guess it will make it easier for the guy but if you love a woman,you will certainly not want to send her out to the hands of one crazy slowpoke who will now calm down and really do her well..please does that make sense?

Who knows if the new woman you now bring home is even worse than a female dog.

Fanirandele:


Gifts were exchanged by both families so no one can say they bought anyone. Both family gave equal gifts . Marriage is about 2 adults deciding to spend their lives together and not exchanging your child for material goods

Fanirandele:


Gifts were exchanged by both families so no one can say they bought anyone. Both families gave equal gifts and as they wished . Marriage is about 2 adults deciding to spend their lives together and not exchanging your child for material goods

seaga:


Well you re not been quite honest ,because traditional marriage in this part of the world depicts a woman is handed over to the man.

Toks2008:


I totally second your standview but we must start learning to adjust to this fact.

look at this scenario..i have been with you for years and i have invested so much love ,time and resources then you got carried away for whatever reason and after you are found out you apologize.

Does it make sense for me to drive you out against all odds?

Except the man does not love the lady i guess it will make it easier for the guy but if you love a woman,you will certainly not want to send her out to the hands of one crazy slowpoke who will now calm down and really do her well..please does that make sense?

Who knows if the new woman you now bring home is even worse than a female dog.

An unrepentant adultress is very different from a strAyed one.

Greene66:


A man is the head.

Yes. The man owns the woman. The man is in charge. He is the boss. The king. The everything.

Live with that fact. Your husband own you.

akike:


I wouldn't have believed it if I didn't have a working mother and a school mother.....come and see stories


Our men are men, strong men. ,

Fanirandele:


I really understand don't how someone can tell me he knows better about my own experience than me They were handed to each other , that's how it works in my family and that's it will be for my daughters .no man will ever have mouth to say he paid for my daughter or owns her

akike:


@seaga, even if they didn't exchange gifts

Traditionally, the wife's family provide the food, venue etc . This means that things are changing!

seaga:


Yes that's norm for the bride''s family to host their guest who is paying enormous bride price.What is changing if to be noted is the groom to provide funds also to the bride''s family to assist with their responsibility of hosting.

emperorchedda:
You didn't answer the fellow before asking him questions.

Give him one reason why the woman isn't owned by the man after he has paid her bride price, bought all sort of food stuffs, clothing, animal and whatnot for her family. Still brings her to HIS house, feeds her with HIS money, and basically takes all the responsibilities that comes with her

Now answer his question

akike:


Actually culture is dynamic. people can insult the whites from morning till night. The ere are something you can or still can't do

Culture/Tradition is not set in stone. if i decide that my family eats just oats in the morning...it is a form of tradition

There is no reason whatsoever why they can't eat a proper sandwich

That is exactly why I have issues with you.

You want to apply logic when it comes to bride price, but washing your underwear, mbanu

Specialbaby:
this is just crazy,a man own which woman??

GJames:
I don't support divorce, but Toks get married first before you castigate divorcees

If my wife commits adultry, I will forgive her, then send her packing.

I should keep an Ogbanje as wife and show her love and she will bring us good fortunes. Quit reading fairytales Toks.
You have created so many threads that made sense, but seriously I don't entirely agree with this piece

akike:


In Yoruba land, you do not pay enormous bride price and you only bring the stuff on the D-day. that means if you do not meet up to the list, you are still going to get married.

Bride price=resources for hosting the ceremony. I think that is as equal as it can get.

seaga:


So this is daretodiffer , if I had known wouldn't ve responded because you re....
as for the underwear i applied logic to that topic too,which you obviously didn't and still don't understand. She mentioned it for a reason. ...but like I said she was wasting her precious time because those who needed to learn from her humility are so lost. Adios

seaga:


In iboland it is a bank breaking endeavour for a man which is nothing compared to hosting .So on the contrary the purchase of a bride is more significant in your land than any other,to the point it's a huge debt to be paid back which explains why divorcing is so much difficult in your land.
Speaking of hosting a lot of groom still contributes to that and most time even pay for the venue, except in few cases the brides family is buoyant, even wedding gown who pays for it...

akike:


She mentioned to show that she loves him

Ask yourself why would a woman who could afford the best washing machine to wash anything...there are million ways to show humility

She chose one that she could afford to do.

Is it no the same topic a married man claimed that she was lying? That is logic for you.

It is like telling me that Hilary Clinton stayed in her marriage because she cared for her husband. It does not make sense to wash it, but she did because of what.....

But as for me, i can't. I will rather cook efo riro everyday to show love.



All these humility, respect etc do not work for me because it works both ways. you respect one another, you are humble to one another, you love one another, you treat your partner the way you want to be treated.

seaga:


So the act in isolation of the public wasn't a show of love and respect, so had to wait so many years after to come to the public to show her love to her husband by telling us all.Damn it's worse than I thought. Just listen to yourself.I am not doing this with you ever again

Bookiemart01:
Please tell us how you came into conclusion that men were not created to mate only 1 woman till they die.

I think the problem with most Nigerian men is that you all have been raised with this wrong notion. It's only in Africa a man cheats on his wife and flaunts it in her face. As bad as the whites are, they respect thier partners. They don't cheat and show off with it.

What makes you think a woman can't decide to cheat on her husband? Why do you think nature created women to mate only 1 man till they die?

So you think women don't sometimes look at men who are more handsome, hard working, richer, eloquent. ....than thier spouses? We only just decide not to cheat. We have self control.

You men throw caution to the wind in the name of "it's our nature to cheat".

If una push woman, woman go check and guess what, God created women to be crafty, a woman can cheat on you and you'll never know unless she wants to rub it on your face

GJames:
I don't support divorce, but Toks get married first before you castigate divorcees

If my wife commits adultry, I will forgive her, then send her packing.

I should keep an Ogbanje as wife and show her love and she will bring us good fortunes. Quit reading fairytales Toks.
You have created so many threads that made sense, but seriously I don't entirely agree with this piece

Greene66:


A man is the head.

Yes. The man owns the woman. The man is in charge. He is the boss. The king. The everything.

Live with that fact. Your husband own you.

Toks2008:


I am not married but if i am and my wife cheats on me and she is repentant i will forgive her for real.

What sense will it make for me to drive my wife away to another man's hands? and what is the likelihood that the next woman will be that chaste?
This is one fact many guys dont know.

As for the quoted verse please reead again and you will see my points.

seaga:


Well then how come the United States has the highest divorce cases,correct me if am wrong .So whatever the modalities it isn't suggestive. So I guess not

Its not how a couples marry but what couples do after the wedding that leads to divorce.
So I yes,It's the better.
Are you feeling a bit national
Because before you found out I was Afro American you sounded like you where for no bride price.
In fact you posed the idea.