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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Please Advice... (1969 Views)
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Please Advice... by neo2smart: 11:27am On May 27, 2016 |
I've a boyfriend, he is more or less my Fiance. We have been dating for two years now. He has so far refused to propose formally to me just because of the nature of my job. I'm hardly in the country due to the nature of my job, not my fault though. He isn't working for the now and he depends solely on my earnings yet he is not comfortable with what I do. I've tried getting a job for him, but he refuses to even get in touch with my contacts, claiming he is a man and must get a job by his own efforts. I'm tired of waiting for him to settle down, but I deeply love him... I wouldn't want to leave him for some reasons, one of which is what his family would say when I do. I believe they would probably think I left him because he hasn't gotten a job. I'm really so confused on my next line of action. Please advise!!!! I'm not getting any younger, not that I'm desperate oo... |
Re: Please Advice... by Nobody: 11:30am On May 27, 2016 |
You folks keep asking questions...you know the answers too... ![]() |
Re: Please Advice... by JeffreyJamez(m): 11:34am On May 27, 2016 |
neo2smart: For your own good.....Stop giving him money, dump his lazy ass, and go for a guy with sense...no matter what you do in life, people will always talk....the signs of an irresponsible man is staring you in the face and you are saying what I dont know....better drop him fast! 7 Likes |
Re: Please Advice... by bentlywills(m): 11:38am On May 27, 2016 |
Watch well b4 u limp sister No responsible man wouldn't want a job no matter who gets d contact, don't let love cloud ur sense of reasoning I wish u guys well tho' 1 Like |
Re: Please Advice... by ivyy(f): 11:44am On May 27, 2016 |
It seems he's comfortable with the hand outs you give him. You know exactly what to do girl. I won't even bother telling you. 3 Likes |
Re: Please Advice... by Kondomatic(m): 11:47am On May 27, 2016 |
ivyy:I think her boyfriend has destructive ego. |
Re: Please Advice... by ivyy(f): 11:49am On May 27, 2016 |
Kondomatic:That's right. He should stop taking her money too. I wonder why his ego doesn't get in the way for that. ![]() |
Re: Please Advice... by Nobody: 11:50am On May 27, 2016 |
Dude's not responsible, plus he's got ego issues. If you get married to him, the problems will compound. That's when he'd do every irrational thing to prove to you that he's a man regardless of whether or not you're the breadwinner. 3 Likes |
Re: Please Advice... by Kondomatic(m): 11:53am On May 27, 2016 |
ivyy:That's why I called it a destructive ego. It doesn't want him to see the danger in not making his own money. He's still a boy. |
Re: Please Advice... by macaranta(m): 11:54am On May 27, 2016 |
How can a man decide not to work?strange. |
Re: Please Advice... by neo2smart: 12:13pm On May 27, 2016 |
in all...you guys are saying I should dump him...can you really do that to someone you trully love? Fine he is egoistic, but he also has some other good traits too, hence I fell in love with him. What I really need to know now, is possible ways I can make him accept a job from my contacts. He is the very suspicious type. I've begged some of my contacts to send him job invites, but he somehow finds out I'm involved and he backs out. |
Re: Please Advice... by sseunth(m): 12:24pm On May 27, 2016 |
neo2smart:sometimes, u have to make a hard decision for the one u love....if u cnt leave him alone then i think u are happy as u are gvn him money.....leave him so that he can get sense or stay with him and keep on feeding him.... 2 Likes |
Re: Please Advice... by JeffreyJamez(m): 12:28pm On May 27, 2016 |
neo2smart: Love alone cannot hold down a relationship!.. Stop making stupid excuses for him.If he loves you the way you love him,he won't let his stupid ego get in the way of you helping him...heck... he will cherish you for trying to help him out....What I see here is a lazy human being with ego problems. For this economic hardship na hin person dey turn down contacts cos na him babe work am?....what non sense!!.....he's suspicious of what?....so he doesn't even trust you?.....and you're still making excuses for him?.......what's doing you sef?! 4 Likes |
Re: Please Advice... by Nobody: 12:28pm On May 27, 2016 |
neo2smart: Of course not Fine he is egoistic, but he also has some other good traits too, hence I fell in love with him. Love is wonderful ![]() What I really need to know now, is possible ways I can make him accept a job from my contacts. He is the very suspicious type. I've begged some of my contacts to send him job invites, but he somehow finds out I'm involved and he backs out. Its good you're really sticking by your man through thick and thin. Encourage him to apply for a job in the company of one of your contacts, let him not know you're behind the scene. When he gets the job, don't ever bring it up in any conversation that you helped him out. Note: let him be the one to apply |
Re: Please Advice... by JeffreyJamez(m): 12:31pm On May 27, 2016 |
skarlett: You are speaking Britinish......lol Did you miss the part she said "...somehow he manages to find out.." ? 1 Like |
Re: Please Advice... by neo2smart: 12:39pm On May 27, 2016 |
skarlett:it won't work. He's gonna get suspicious when I encourages him to apply for a job in a particular company. All he wants is to get a job on his own without my help in any form. Problem is he isn't sending his Cvs to companies where I've friends. |
Re: Please Advice... by Nobody: 12:39pm On May 27, 2016 |
JeffreyJamez: True that Well, since love conquers all there's no need for her to bother him with getting a job. They can live comfortably happily ever after on what she makes. She can even give him the money to pay her bride price sef, so they'll get married and everyone is happy ![]() |
Re: Please Advice... by neo2smart: 12:44pm On May 27, 2016 |
skarlett:give him money to pay my bride price ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Please Advice... by Nobody: 12:44pm On May 27, 2016 |
neo2smart: ![]() ![]() ![]() I suppose he's not suitably qualified to get a job in the companies he's applying to without your help ![]() |
Re: Please Advice... by JeffreyJamez(m): 12:46pm On May 27, 2016 |
skarlett: Why do I have a feeling you're being mischievously sarcastic ![]() |
Re: Please Advice... by Nobody: 12:46pm On May 27, 2016 |
neo2smart: Okay |
Re: Please Advice... by JeffreyJamez(m): 12:48pm On May 27, 2016 |
skarlett: He's not qualified to be a man!.... he should turn in his Man-Card Asap! |
Re: Please Advice... by neo2smart: 12:49pm On May 27, 2016 |
skarlett:Qualifications isn't the issue, He is sometimes over qualified for the jobs he applys to. He never seems to pass the interview stage. |
Re: Please Advice... by Nobody: 12:51pm On May 27, 2016 |
JeffreyJamez: ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() She's head over heels in love with him, wouldn't wanna burst her bubbles. Besides look at the thread, y'all are saying the same thing but she's adamant on what she thinks is good for her, so wetin be my own? ![]() |
Re: Please Advice... by JeffreyJamez(m): 12:53pm On May 27, 2016 |
skarlett: heheheh she never ready! 1 Like |
Re: Please Advice... by JeffreyJamez(m): 12:54pm On May 27, 2016 |
neo2smart: You are beginning to annoy me ![]() lemme go and find somewhere else to be great biko.... |
Re: Please Advice... by Nobody: 12:55pm On May 27, 2016 |
JeffreyJamez: ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Re: Please Advice... by JeffreyJamez(m): 12:56pm On May 27, 2016 |
skarlett: lol concern both them........make I go swallow my malaria medicine biko..... |
Re: Please Advice... by Nobody: 12:57pm On May 27, 2016 |
neo2smart: Must be from the village, he should see a pastor asap |
Re: Please Advice... by neo2smart: 12:58pm On May 27, 2016 |
please guys...you don't have to be sarcastic to convey your message. Love aside, let's all just see this as a way of helping a fellow human being stand on his feets without knowing where the help is coming from. I had thought of breaking up with him, then work underground to help him get a job...but what if he doesn't want me back when I return to him after he must have gotten a job, without him thinking I deserted him while he was jobless. |
Re: Please Advice... by JeffreyJamez(m): 1:01pm On May 27, 2016 |
neo2smart: As the Human being doesnt want to help himself nko....will you now put your life on pause because of an Over grown baby?.... you sure say this guy no use juju for you so....because I am still trying to phantom how this is even a discussion! 2 Likes |
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