My fiancee is an American citizen . Born of Nigerian parents and grew up in America. I on the other hand a Nigerian guy who has a banking job with fairly decent pay . My fiancee wants me to move to USA with her and quit Nigeria . What should I do people.

Don't do it

Make sure you have a job before you quit or have a plan - school, certification etc


Most women change when the man is not earning anything

What does she do.. your post just emphasizes Americana

Travel oo bro

My friend, it depends on your broad plan with her.

Remember Poor Planning Prevents Poor Performance as they always say.

Discuss critically with her the likely challenges like looking for job if you resign here to migrate to the US

Discuss the tendency of her taking care of your until you settle down.

Remember you might need to do one or two certificate programmes there to enable you secure good jobs.

When are you planning to marry, where, accommodation challenge, etc.

While I think you are better off if you travel, women can change when they are the ones providing for the house and men too are usually unfaithful.

The tow of you should weigh your options, what is your self-discipline level? How smart are you? Level of education? Will you be faithful to her?
etc.
It is an opportunity that you may not get easily if lost but think of the pros and cons before taking step.

You fiancée seems to be a good person, don't disappoint her.

Why you need the advice of strangers on an issue you can work out with your fiancee, beats me.

when you get there what are you going to be doing? house-husband?
I Hope you know the streets over there are not paved with gold.

JustHere2Observ:
Why you need the advice of strangers on an issue you can work out with your fiancee, beats me.

Even me o
Our input doesn't even count most of time,but dats what makes the thread nd this forum

Go ahead and relocate. You get your papers, you settle in, within 7 months or less, you should have your green card and should be able to work ASAP. Employment is not scarce in the US, so with your experience you shouldn't have issues. Good luck'

Really appreciate all the input. She is ready to stand by me until I get my papers and green p. She is working and earning a decent wage.

veraponpo:

My friend, it depends on your broad plan with her.
Remember Poor Planning Prevents Poor Performance as they always say.
Discuss critically with her the likely challenges like looking for job if you resign here to migrate to the US
Discuss the tendency of her taking care of your until you settle down.
Remember you might need to do one or two certificate programmes there to enable you secure good jobs.
When are you planning to marry, where, accommodation challenge, etc.
While I think you are better off if you travel, women can change when they are the ones providing for the house and men too are usually unfaithful.
The tow of you should weigh your options, what is your self-discipline level? How smart are you? Level of education? Will you be faithful to her?
etc.
It is an opportunity that you may not get easily if lost but think of the pros and cons before taking step.
You fiancée seems to be a good person, don't disappoint her.

My fiance is a very good person. She will remain good as long as I remain faithful. Being faithful has always been a problem for me .

She can take care of things at least until I get my feet and my papers as she earns a fairly good wage.

Here I feel like a free man that can do what I want. But also considering the future. Job security, security , state of our economy and so on.

" Being faithful has always been a problem to you", nawaooh!!! She don enter one chance.

If I were you, I would hold on until we get married. You guys should conclude the issue of marriage already. Would she be getting married in Nigeria? Do her parents reside in Nigeria?

My guy, kindly make sure you go for your masters degree when you get there if it's possible. That way, you can get a decent job that's quite similar to the one you're doing in Nija.

Another option relates to acquiring skills such as painting and decorating, IT skills (l mean proper ones), F - Gas training as it's known in the UK when you get there. There are opportunities provided you do your research well in Nija, have an indepth talk with your fiancée. If you acquire one of these skills, you've got a better chance to be self employed after few years experience. This will also help you settle down comfortably if you want to start your own biz back home. One more thing, learn how to drive if you haven't before you leave. Good luck!

People change

byvan03:
" Being faithful has always been a problem to you", nawaooh!!! She don enter one chance.

OP have your heard the phrase Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned
Please dont go to no mans land if you wont be faithful o!
Guns are legal in Yankee
A word is enough for the wise.

Pangolo123:
My guy, kindly make sure you go for your masters degree when you get there if it's possible. That way, you can get a decent job that's quite similar to the one you're doing in Nija.

Another option relates to acquiring skills such as painting and decorating, IT skills (l mean proper ones), F - Gas training as it's known in the UK when you get there. There are opportunities provided you do your research well in Nija, have an indepth talk with your fiancée. If you acquire one of these skills, you've got a better chance to be self employed after few years experience. This will also help you settle down comfortably if you want to start your own biz back home. One more thing, learn how to drive if you haven't before you leave. Good luck!

You are right
People under estimate the advantages of having a skill in hand
People straight off the plane are charging £60 for braids and £40 to sew simple skirt and blouse
Please dont travel without any skill as this will keep you going until you settle down.

Let her come home, marry you first and file for an immigrant visa for you while you still work here in Nigeria. With that you will be able to secure your green card as soon as you get there.

pickabeau1:
Don't do it

Make sure you have a job before you quit or have a plan - school, certification etc


Most women change when the man is not earning anything

What does she do.. your post just emphasizes Americana

Most women do not change...

They repay the husband in his own coins. If he treated her well when he was earning, chances are he will be treated well if he is not earning.

See the bold:

okgerald:
Really appreciate all the input. She is ready to stand by me until I get my papers and green p. She is working and earning a decent wage.
My fiance is a very good person. She will remain good as long as I remain faithful. Being faithful has always been a problem for me .
She can take care of things at least until I get my feet and my papers as she earns a fairly good wage.
Here I feel like a free man that can do what I want. But also considering the future. Job security, security , state of our economy and so on.

bukatyne:


Most women do not change...

They repay the husband in his own coins. If he treated her well when he was earning, chances are he will be treated well if he is not earning.

See the bold:

Irrespective,.... According to you
All women who mistreat their husbands are doing what they did to them too

No problem then

.

Advice from a brother who had practical experience living in USA for two years and Nigeria for over 32 years.

After you live in USA for just six months you will realise that Nigeria is hell on earth. So for a better quality if life, leave Nigeria. Some of the things you guys worry about and beg the government for everyday are taken for granted here. Light, fuel, food ,security, roads , hospitals etc. In Nigeria even if you are wealthy you still have to worry about all these things.

Since your babe is a US citizen, you dont have any problems as she can file for a fiancee visa for you which means that when you get here you must marry within 90 days after which she will file for you.You will have your social security number that allows you to work within 3 months of filing and your green card within six months to seven months of the filing date. This process is called adjustment of status.

OR: get her to come to Nigeria, do the court wedding in ,Nigeria, then she files for you and you can join her in six to seven months and you can start working right away without being a burden on her if you dont like the idea if a woman taking care of you while you wait for your papers here in USA.

I used to be a baller in my single years but now I just remind myself that after all my woman has done for me, it would be bad to repay her with fooling around.moreso I would not want her to do the same to me if I was in her shoes.

Talk to your babe and examine your options.but maje sure you are on the same page in any decision you make.

Lots of good advice already posted here

Try and get married to her legally before you go. You gotta protect yourself and your status there. Fiance is not the same as being married.

Try get admission into a school before leaving. They value their own Educational system more than ours for very obvious reasons. You have a decent job here with great career prospects. You need to give yourself a chance for same in America.

Lastly, don't full-around when you get there. If she finds out, you will surely regret it.

You are a young man and you have started your life well. You do not want to travel to America to become a liability to someone else. It may even be very frustrating for you if you don't get a job quickly and you have to depend on her for everything. You need to make sure you are engaged when you get there and in my view, getting a Masters degree is a good step.

According to you, this my post below

bukatyne:

Most women do not change
They repay the husband in his own coins. If he treated her well when he was earning, chances are he will be treated well if he is not earning
See the bold:

Translates to this?

pickabeau1:

Irrespective,.... According to you
All women who mistreat their husbands are doing what they did to them too

No problem then

I give up.

Maybe you need to make yourself clearer

bukatyne:
According to you, this my post below



Translates to this?



I give up.

It seems I have everything working in my favour.
It's a k1 visa that we are processing.
We are also working on starting my masters programme as soon as possible once I relocate .
I have no choice than to be faithful and good.
Seems the pros far outshine the cons. Thanks for all the wonderful advice my people.

pickabeau1:
Maybe you need to make yourself clearer

It is not as simple as a husband stops earning and the wife automatically becomes a 'witch'

pickabeau1:
Don't do it

Make sure you have a job before you quit or have a plan - school, certification etc


Most women change when the man is not earning anything

What does she do.. your post just emphasizes Americana

Pick, you can lie o

bukatyne:


It is not as simple as a husband stops earning and the wife automatically becomes a 'witch'

no problem then

Kimoni:

Pick, you can lie o

its a lie because its not what u'd like to hear?

tearoses:




OP have your heard the phrase Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned
Please dont go to no mans land if you wont be faithful o!
Guns are legal in Yankee
A word is enough for the wise.

He has no idea.

bukatyne:


Most women do not change...

They repay the husband in his own coins. If he treated her well when he was earning, chances are he will be treated well if he is not earning.

See the bold:

Thank you!

byvan03:



Thank you!

You're welcome

OP from the look of things, she's the one who needs to be worried not you.

You have a problem being faithful that means you're probably cheating on her as you guys are engaged. How does she know you won't reach there, get your papers and start following one whitey?

At best if you cheat on her and she reacts accordingly, you'll to come to NL to lament how Nigerian ladies in America are Jezebels because they refuse to swallow poo.
Of course you'll make it about her being the one earning money.

Better don't use the girl if you don't intend to love her genuinely.