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Re: . by Dandeson1(m): 11:35pm On Jun 15, 2016 |
Re: . by Belaqua(f): 11:36pm On Jun 15, 2016 |
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Re: . by Rikidony(m): 11:38pm On Jun 15, 2016 |
Belaqua:YOU INTENTIONALLY LIVING BARREN MEANS U ARE |
Re: . by Nobody: 11:39pm On Jun 15, 2016 |
The worrisome part is that she I trying to preach to us about what she thinks and why she sticks with her opinion. You asked us what you should expect. We have told you. Unless the country has changed his parents, expect the "I don't want kids" thing a BIG, HUGE, FAT,OBESE Problem. This coupled with the "I don't cook.." . You think he can convince his parents? Hahaha..well he can try and might succeed. But most African parents will not even hear him out. I would love to see him try. There is no need trying to make us see your reasons or give counters to what we think you should expect. We understand. You are not Nigerian raised. We are Nigerian raised. We are raised to hope for kids. To want them. They are a priority. We practically have no say in certain things. They are a norm. You were raised to have a say and believe that what you want must be what you want. So, my opinion is we have told you your two area of concern. 1. The no kids issue 2. The I don't cook Bla Bla Bla Don't preach the "U.S" way to us. Go find out if his parents are traditional or not. Tell him to raise the issue with them first. For instance, he can tell them that he knows this guy that wants to marry a lady and she doesn't want kids. Let him listen to their opinions and what they think. This is so that you are prepared. |
Re: . by Belaqua(f): 11:45pm On Jun 15, 2016 |
. 1 Like |
Re: . by ifex370(m): 11:49pm On Jun 15, 2016 |
Belaqua: At least well start from there... Igba nkwu means traditional marriage But if your man is OK with it.. Which I highly doubt.. Go on.. Nothing do you |
Re: . by schumastic(m): 11:51pm On Jun 15, 2016 |
Belaqua: my dear be positive..how long do you think it will be before u both start talking about it n if you haven't started talking about marriage then why are you bothered about the parents..as a lady your priorities must be set right, afte which you work towards archieving..is obvious u love this guy n won't mind spending the rest of ur life with him..just do the right thing n pls pls pls change that no kid mentality cus if u parents decided not to have kids, you won't be here asking us this ? (fact)... so don't kill the life cycle thanks |
Re: . by Nobody: 11:52pm On Jun 15, 2016 |
Belaqua: Don't take the preach part seriously. Perhaps a lighter term could have sufficed. What I am saying is this. We get the fact that you are who you are and want to have a say with what goes on in your life. We are hardly raised that way. Having kids come with the whole "How I Want My Future To Be Like" package. It is culture. A norm. It is almost like telling us to go naked or not to have a future, if you say you don't want kids. Not only his parents have a say. His grand parents. His brothers. You have his sisters also to contend with. When you marry an African (especially a Nigerian) there is this saying that you marry his entire family. Like I modified my earlier post, let him do the talking with his parents and find out their opinions on these matters. Then he does the gauging. That way you know what to expect. |
Re: . by ifex370(m): 11:56pm On Jun 15, 2016 |
Belaqua: He has cooked for you
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Re: . by Belaqua(f): 11:56pm On Jun 15, 2016 |
AnakinSkywalker: Thank you, I understand what you're saying + appreciate the advice. |
Re: . by Rikidony(m): 12:01am On Jun 16, 2016 |
lalasticlala this lady needs your help |
Re: . by smileysmiley(f): 6:13am On Jun 16, 2016 |
Belaqua:you could try your luck with the parents and if you really love your man, you should be willing to change those philosophies cause they'll pose as a big problem in the long run |
Re: . by smileysmiley(f): 6:28am On Jun 16, 2016 |
lalasticlala move this to the permanent site, this babe needs to understand that her philosophy won't go down well with our Nigerian culture, maybe when she sees that everyone commenting is saying the same thing, she'll understand and know what to do about her relationship... haba babe, you are 27 already, no time to think about whether you want kids or not cause a typical naija parent acts as if menopause starts at 30, they'll disturb you for kids even when their son is impotent, ever heard the term "barren witch" before brace yourself for insults my dear if you choose to continue in this path and don't let that dude deceive you that he is cool with it cause there is a high probability that he'll have a child with someone else who is willing and that is the beginning of your problem, that is if he even agrees to marry you... why not talk with him about it again and read his body language |
Re: . by Nobody: 6:39am On Jun 16, 2016 |
Rikidony: sucker punch
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