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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help (95463 Views)
"Why I Proposed To My Girlfriend With N2 Million Dummy Cheque" - Nigerian Man / She's HIV Positive, How Do I Tell Her?? / I Proposed To A Lady The First Time I Saw Her And She Accepted On The Spot (2) (3) (4)
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Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by LastSurvivor: 7:33am On Jun 20, 2016 |
To make it simple, the risk is just too much for ME to take.. E go really hard abeg.. |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by eyinjuege: 7:33am On Jun 20, 2016 |
anonymousreport: Dude, that's why I said its an erroneous belief. I was trying to point that out to someone that thought otherwise |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by kniru: 7:41am On Jun 20, 2016 |
my guy!!!...like say u don dey craze baa!, beta arrest that gal now, what would yu ve done if mistakenly she infected you with the virus.. Oga use ur head oo...dis wan don pass love |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by eyinjuege: 7:45am On Jun 20, 2016 |
ndisy: Those are serodiscordant couples. I think you need to find out more about them, because its not only men that can be negative while the partner is positive. The first cases of people who didn't catch HIV while exposed was seen in female prostitutes who remained HIV negative despite their exposure. It was assumed they had a natural resistance to the virus. Because you find a few serodiscordant couples doesn't mean men don't easily get infected. That sort of thinking is what makes the virus spread more, and making people choose such risky lifestyles |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by mentorandfriend(m): 7:47am On Jun 20, 2016 |
eyinjuege:The person you quoted is right about what he said. Don't counter what you have no knowledge about. |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by sammhi(m): 7:48am On Jun 20, 2016 |
why do you want to risk your life for a woman..
pls move on...jare
that is not love o but foolishness |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by pre88: 7:49am On Jun 20, 2016 |
Bro, if you love her, go ahead and marry her. I am a HIV counselor tester, we have couples that the man is HIV negative and the wife is HIV positive. They have two children now and both children are negative. They is nothing to be afraid of, rather, you should support and encourage her to take her drugs. 2 Likes |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by Endy4all(m): 7:50am On Jun 20, 2016 |
....just like you won't stay if you had earlier knowledge of this. Don't marry her. Love grows and love dies. Let this one die |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by eyinjuege: 7:50am On Jun 20, 2016 |
mentorandfriend: Are you kidding me? It would take you or the person years to know half of what I know about HIV, and this isn't me trying to be corky. |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by lymelyte(m): 7:51am On Jun 20, 2016 |
kaybills: 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by mentorandfriend(m): 7:54am On Jun 20, 2016 |
eyinjuege:Funny human being. |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by alizma: 7:56am On Jun 20, 2016 |
fadjnr: bro, the chances are never equal, ask your doctor if u have any. to further confirm to you that the chances are not equal, there are many cases where a lady and a guy had unprotected sex, went for test and while d lady is positive, the guy is confirmed negative but there are hardly cases involving unprotected sex where the guy is positive and the lady tested negative. |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by sammyclassics(m): 7:58am On Jun 20, 2016 |
She told you because she love you. Just pray over it for direction. |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by clemskay(m): 8:03am On Jun 20, 2016 |
[right][/right] eyinjuege: DrLuv:you are right but not absolutely. a friend of mine had unprotected Sex with his HIV Infested girlfriend for almost a year without him contracting it, not until they both went for Hiv test recently while planning their intro. it was discovered lady was HIV positive with higher viral load but d guy was Hiv free. |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by dubbiskelly(m): 8:04am On Jun 20, 2016 |
histemple: Your post is very misleading and poses a danger to uninformed minds. What crack is bigger than the penile opening of the urethra? The vaginal fluid has a high load of the virus and yet u say a man can be bleeping and may not get it? While it may be true, there are a thousand and one factors that may be responsible for it, one of which is the mans immune system. An infected man may deposit a viral laden sperm in a woman with good immune response and she may not develop the infection. Both parties may only develop the infection following repeated exposures, which compromises their immunity. Abeg make una protect unasef, I don talk finish. 2 Likes |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by tripletees1(m): 8:05am On Jun 20, 2016 |
Hello bro, you need to look at the positive aspect and also view the negative aspect of the issue. make I tell u what u need to know.. Negative aspect in my view.. that lady is capable of killing u if she can hide that kind of secret.. See ur life is in danger if u don't know oo.. And also its not her fault for delaying that statement oo. She was scared that if she reveal such secret to any Niger guy.. Omo na so Dem go tear race oo.. Not really her fault.. if the doctor says u guys can go ahead I pray God will guide ur path. |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by tripletees1(m): 8:06am On Jun 20, 2016 |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by jabojafa(m): 8:06am On Jun 20, 2016 |
Gasout:get this book for her and ursef: The Unlimited Power of Faith - by David Oyedepo |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by eyinjuege: 8:08am On Jun 20, 2016 |
mentorandfriend: . The point is we don't need more people thinking its OK to engage in risky behaviour. The major source of transmission of the virus in Naija is from heterosexual intercourse, not woman on woman action. The risk is even higher in developing countries, and that has a lot to do with our risky behaviour towards sex. Have you ever run an HIV clinic? Anyways its nice for people to be aware, and to learn more about the virus, and how to protect themselves. Its actually sensible to be responsible for one's sexual health. |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by mousco(m): 8:09am On Jun 20, 2016 |
Na wah o, this girl get mind o Afta intro u re tellin him HIV +, so d girl want d dude to spend his money buying HIV pills for d numba of yrs she will spend. HIV nor be malaria o 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by clefstone(m): 8:16am On Jun 20, 2016 |
Vickyydera:if u become hiv+ before marraige will u remain single and celibate forever? |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by seangy4konji: 8:16am On Jun 20, 2016 |
I don't know if your mother deh alive or dead. May God keep your family alive but Haa you need to buy big motor for her. Her prayers no gree leave you. quote author=Gasout post=46704436] Yes, we had sex just once and it was protected[/quote] 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by segunfunmi(f): 8:16am On Jun 20, 2016 |
I know of a couples that have married. For 7 years now, the wife is positive while the husband is still negative. The wife is on drug and she follows the rules of the drug very well. And they have children. They have unprotected sex only when they want to have children. |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by seangy4konji: 8:17am On Jun 20, 2016 |
I don't know if your mother deh alive or dead. May God keep your family alive but Haa you need to buy big motor for her. Her prayers no gree leave you. Na thanks giving come remain now Ps on a more serious kite. It's nothing. As long as she is playing by the laid down rules. You are good to go with her.if you truly love her. Jut hold the hospital check ups like the way you will hold on to Jesus or Allah all the time. [author=Gasout post=46704436] Yes, we had sex just once and it was protected[/quote] |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by Nobody: 8:21am On Jun 20, 2016 |
Vickyydera:[email] Ruining his life in what aspect/sense exactly? They point here's marriage, not some bf/gf relationship shii. So? [/email] |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by oma19(f): 8:23am On Jun 20, 2016 |
U r. Confuse but to Tell the truth it doesn't matter Hiv patient live long have babies that r not infected. Awareness r being create for people to get married to them like the movie or soap opera called Shuga |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by Phemzy(m): 8:23am On Jun 20, 2016 |
@op It's your decision to make. While not moving on in the relationship is not the best. Same as moving on. So I will advise u should do your research very well and involve God. Also I found an article. See below WHAT IS A “MIXED-STATUS” RELATIONSHIP? A "mixed-status" relationship is a sexual relationship in which one partner is HIV-positive and the other is HIV-negative. This can involve a couple in a long-term relationship or a single encounter between two partners. You may also hear these terms to describe such relationships: Serodiscordant Discordant Serodivergent Magnetic HIV-positive/negative IS IT SAFE FOR MIXED-STATUS COUPLES TO HAVE SEX? For mixed-status couples, the possibility of HIV infection is a constant reality. There is always a risk of transmitting HIV, but you can minimize it. TIPS FOR THE HIV-NEGATIVE PARTNER If you are the HIV-negative partner in a mixed-status relationship, here are steps you can take to reduce your chances of getting HIV: Encourage your HIV-positive partner to get and stay on antiretroviral therapy (ART), and support your partner in taking all of his/her HIV medications at the right time. This “medication adherence” will lower your partner’s viral load, keep your partner healthy, and reduce the risk that HIV can be transmitted. Use condoms consistently and correctly. When used correctly and consistently, condoms are highly effective in preventing HIV infection, as well as other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). Both male and female condoms are available. For more information on condom use, see CDC’s HIV Basics: Prevention. Choose less risky sexual behaviors. MouthAction is much less risky than anal or vaginal sex. Anal sex is the highest-risk sexual activity for HIV transmission. If you are HIV-negative, insertive anal sex (“topping”) is less risky for getting HIV than receptive anal sex (“bottoming”). Remember: HIV can be sexually transmitted via blood, semen (cum), pre-seminal fluid (pre-cum), rectal fluid, and vaginal fluid. Sexual activities that do not involve the potential exchange of these bodily fluids (e.g. touching) carry no risk for getting HIV. For information on ways to reduce the risk of getting HIV through sexual contact, see our page on Reducing Your Sexual Risk for HIV. Talk to your doctor about pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP). PrEP is a way for people who don’t have HIV to prevent HIV infection by taking a pill every day. The pill contains two medicines that are also used to treat HIV. Along with other prevention methods like condoms, PrEP can offer good protection against HIV if taken every day. The CDC recommends PrEP be considered for people who are HIV-negative and at substantial risk for HIV infection. This includes HIV-negative individuals who are in an ongoing relationship with an HIV-positive partner, as well at others at high risk. For more information, see our page on PrEP. Talk to your doctor right away (within 3 days) about post-exposure prophylaxis (PEP) if you think you have had a possible exposure to HIV. An example of a possible exposure is if you had anal or vaginal sex with your HIV-positive partner without a condom, and you are not taking PrEP. Your chance of exposure to HIV is lower if your HIV-positive partner is taking ART consistently and correctly, especially if his/her viral load is undetectable. Starting PEP immediately and taking it daily for 4 weeks reduces your chance of getting HIV. For more information, see our page on PEP. Get tested for HIV. You should get tested for HIV at least once a year so that you are sure about your HIV status and can take action to keep healthy. Talk to your doctor about whether you may also benefit from more frequent testing (e.g. every 3-6 months). Use the AIDS.gov HIV Testing and Care Services Locator to find a testing site near you, or use a home testing kit. Get tested and treated for other STDs and encourage your partner to do the same. If either of you are sexually active outside the partnership, you should get tested at least once a year and talk to your provider about whether more frequent testing is of benefit. STDs can have long-term health consequences. They can also increase your chance of getting HIV. Find an STD testing site. Use the AIDS.gov HIV Testing and Care Services Locator to find a testing site near you. TIPS FOR THE HIV-POSITIVE PARTNER If you are the HIV-positive partner in a mixed-status relationship, here are steps you can take to reduce your risk of transmitting HIV to your partner: Get and stay on antiretroviral therapy (ART). ART reduces the amount of virus in your blood and body fluids. ART can keep you healthy for many years, and greatly reduce your chance of transmitting HIV to your sexual partners if you take it consistently and correctly. If you are taking ART, follow your health care provider’s advice. Visit your health care provider regularly and always take your medicine as directed. Use condoms consistently and correctly. When used correctly and consistently, condoms are highly effective in preventing HIV infection, as well as other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). Both male and female condoms are available. For more information on condom use, see CDC’s HIV Basics: Prevention. Choose less risky sexual behaviors. MouthAction is much less risky than anal or vaginal sex. Anal sex is the highest-risk sexual activity for HIV transmission. During anal sex, it is less risky for you as the HIV-positive partner to be the receptive partner (“bottom”) than the insertive partner (“top”). Remember: HIV can be sexually transmitted via blood, semen (cum), pre-seminal fluid (pre-cum), rectal fluid, and vaginal fluid. Sexual activities that do not involve the potential exchange of these bodily fluids (e.g. touching) carry no risk for transmitting HIV. For information on ways to reduce the risk of transmitting HIV to your partner through sexual contact, see our page on Reducing Your Sexual Risk for HIV. Talk to your partner about pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP), taking HIV medicines daily to prevent HIV infection. The CDC recommends PrEP be considered for people who are HIV-negative and at substantial risk for HIV infection. This includes HIV-negative individuals who are in an ongoing relationship with an HIV-positive partner, as well as others at high risk. For more information, see our page on PrEP. Talk to your partner about post-exposure prophylaxis (PEP) if you think your partner has had a possible exposure to HIV. An example of a possible exposure is if you had anal or vaginal sex without a condom or the condom breaks and your partner is not on PrEP. Your partner’s chance of exposure to HIV is lower if you are taking ART consistently and correctly, especially if your viral load is undetectable. Your partner should talk to his/her doctor right away (within 3 days) if they think they have had a possible exposure to HIV. Starting medicine immediately (known as post-exposure prophylaxis, or PEP) and taking it daily for 4 weeks reduces your partner’s chance of getting HIV. For more information, see our page on PEP. Get tested and treated for STDs and encourage your partner to do the same. If either of you are sexually active outside the partnership, you should get tested at least once a year and talk to your provider about whether more frequent testing is of benefit. STDs can have long-term health consequences. They can also increase your risk of transmitting HIV to others. Use the AIDS.gov HIV Testing and Care Services Locator to find a testing site near you. “I counsel my patients that the greatest gift an HIV-positive partner can give an HIV-negative partner is the gift of undetectability. The risk of transmitting HIV is decreased if one’s viral load is undetectable.” -HIV Provider, Washington, DC KEEP THE LINES OF COMMUNICATION OPEN If you are part of a mixed-status couple, it is important that you and your partner communicate openly and often about safer sex practices and HIV prevention. Healthcare providers and local HIV/AIDS organizations can be important sources of information and support for you and your partner. CDC’s Start Talking. Stop HIV. campaign has information and resources to help you start a conversation about safe sex and HIV. 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by micxwell(m): 8:24am On Jun 20, 2016 |
Zedoo: The truth is always harsh. Well said. 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by tomquest: 8:25am On Jun 20, 2016 |
D O N' T M A R R Y HER. 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by crownwealth68(m): 8:27am On Jun 20, 2016 |
nasha1:D lady is a delibrate terrible player nd a devil, she took d guy to a point of no return, she worked on his love nd trust, for d lady to wait till he proposed i see it as delibrate wickedness. The guy should RUN 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by internetpo(m): 8:32am On Jun 20, 2016 |
Gasout: Dear I feel your delimna and pain. it was wrong of her to have kept d secret from you till now. but am guessing she was trying to keep the news from spreading if u or the men in her life don't love her. U knw how we generally discriminate those living with the virus. you have seen the obvious responses here. Ask her though why she kept it long . I am suspecting that her status is also d reason she has only allowed you make love to her once. like many of the wise advice here, I humbly ask that you go for more counselling. Ask her abt her medication. . support her even if u are not gong to marry her at d end.Sometimes these ppl live healthier and longer than some of us without the virus. I know there is information on how you or ur unborn children cant get d virus . seek help. love conquers all. Above all trust God. I wish u luck. will be praying for u and won't mind knowing the outcome of ur decision. pls Nairalandrrs ppl living with HIV /AIDS are humans like you. STOP THE DESCRIMINATION AND STIGMATIZATION. |
Re: My Fiancee Confessed She's HIV+ After I Proposed To Her. Please, Help by ojialo(m): 8:32am On Jun 20, 2016 |
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