Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,207,193 members, 7,998,138 topics. Date: Saturday, 09 November 2024 at 08:17 AM

[story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy - Literature (28) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy (330030 Views)

Confessions Of A FUNAAB Yahoo Yahoo Boy; The Tales Of Gbadebo / S€X Story : My Lovely Houseboy Episode 1 To 10 / My Life As A Yahoo Boy By Iphekitan/mainland (review) (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) ... (25) (26) (27) (28) (29) (30) (31) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by tobianodino(m): 11:13am On Jul 03, 2016
J. Smith na Gay....mr ife go on bro *thumb up*
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by jibs4lv(m): 12:38pm On Jul 03, 2016
Una yansh don enter am ,pls more bro...
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Mykelpato(m): 1:05am On Jul 04, 2016
grin u Don come lagos be that... Mr Smith go crack ur ass small
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Iphekitan(m): 9:28am On Jul 04, 2016
Coming thru

1 Like

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Iphekitan(m): 10:19am On Jul 04, 2016

2 Likes

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by 3KINGZ18: 1:22pm On Jul 04, 2016
Iphekitan:
Episode 24
continue man nice story
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by olatex25(m): 1:50pm On Jul 04, 2016
Starving already, cnt wait bro
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by kazytoti: 2:09pm On Jul 04, 2016
waiting impatiently
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Iphekitan(m): 2:21pm On Jul 04, 2016
kazytoti:
waiting impatiently
3KINGZ18,olatex25
Clcik on episode 24 above to read it
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Wasquad(m): 8:09pm On Jul 04, 2016
Cool story. But the Gay part you r showing sympathy killed ma interest, what right are u talking about.? This is Africa mehnnnn. No one was born Gay. As they disgust you so they disgust OUR Creator.
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by olatex25(m): 8:43pm On Jul 04, 2016
I dey feel u bro.. "u b Africa man originaj, u no b gentleman at all oo..".. Bt 2 b sincere u serve him rite.
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Iphekitan(m): 11:10am On Jul 05, 2016
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by 3KINGZ18: 11:42am On Jul 05, 2016
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by olatex25(m): 2:03pm On Jul 05, 2016
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by aumeehn: 10:24pm On Jul 05, 2016
Iphekitan:
Episode 25
Guy why naw?? That chidi part is copied!! I mean i read this same shit on a blog few weeks ago!
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by raziboi(m): 10:40pm On Jul 05, 2016
aumeehn:
Guy why naw?? That chidi part is copied!! I mean i read this same shit on a blog few weeks ago!

Y didnt you copy and paste
Daddy go and open ur own thread..abeg


Next
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by aumeehn: 11:30pm On Jul 05, 2016
raziboi:


Y didnt you copy and paste
Daddy go and open ur own thread..abeg


Next
banza shattap before i use slap reset your destiny!! I tell you say na story im copy? The g sabi wetin i de yarn!
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by raziboi(m): 11:51pm On Jul 05, 2016
aumeehn:
banza shattap before i use slap reset your destiny!! I tell you say na story im copy? The g sabi wetin i de yarn! Go and google yahoo yahoo plus you ill find the blog that posted the shii!



I didn't insult you at the ist place°°°
Anyway goos news for u ...i dont do E -fighting
Because i knw u cant talk to me anyhow in ma front

BAM REASON!!!
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by aumeehn: 11:55pm On Jul 05, 2016
raziboi:




I didn't insult you at the ist place°°°
Anyway goos news for u ...i dont do E -fighting
Because i knw u cant talk to me anyhow in ma front

BAM REASON!!!
Hulk Hogan talking

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Iphekitan(m): 6:32am On Jul 06, 2016
Yeah tz tru, tz. Fiction. And bless you, I'm not into yahoo , I did researchs before starting the story, hence the story might come from any angle. But least it's making sense and it has a end. It wasn't from a story but from a news
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Psamist1805(m): 12:29pm On Jul 06, 2016
Update Episode 24 please.........
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Iphekitan(m): 7:38am On Jul 07, 2016
Psamist1805:
Update Episode 24 please.........

Episode 24

Lying sideways on the bed, with nothing but a red G- string on, was John Smith smiling seductively at me. I was irritated to say the least. Ordinarily, I would have stormed out of the room but for the ridiculousness of the
situation, I stayed as I wanted to find out what this retard had planned.

ME: C'mon, what’s the meaning of this?

John Smith : what do you think it is?

ME: errm… You acting really weird?

John Smith : There’s nothing weird about it. Don’t u like it?

ME: Like what?

John Smith : or don’t I look sexy?

He said this rubbing his hands all over his thighs. At this point it became less annoying & just plain silly. So I sat down on 1 of the chairs in the room & decided to play along.

John Smith: Don’t just sit there, come join me on the bed

ME: Are you serious?

John Smith : of course I am. How do you think the game works?

ME: You mean I have to get in bed with you to get a contract?

John Smith : Yes my dear. That’s what everybody does.

ME: So you’ve slept with all your models?

John Smith: No, just the male ones. Didn’t your friend Olisa update you before coming here?

That last bit of information was a little disturbing. The thought of Olisa in bed with John Smith, a fairly macho dude himself turned my stomach. My mind immediately
drifted back to all the times Olisa would touch me at the gym whilst commenting on my biceps or my abs or any other muscle in my body. Never for once did I suspect he was gay. Well as a sharp guy, knowing my modeling
career was over even before it started, I took out my phone & quickly took pictures of John Smith.

He pounced on me but I was out of the door before he could get a hold of me. He ran out after me but soon realized he had nothing on so turned back to his room. He called the
reception to stop me but I was out of there before they realized what was happening. I boarded a cab & dialed his number on my way home.

It was a thursday. I had to drive back to Gombe for my clearance for the week.

I was getting bored in the car, so I called John Smith.

ME : Hey John Smith

John Smith : What do you want?

ME : I’m still trying to figure out what I want

John Smith: Ok, I’ll offer you a contract

ME: Do you think I still wanna be a model after what just happened?

John Smith : Then get on with it, name your price.

ME: How much are you willing to pay to avoid these pictures getting to the press? Does your wife know about your love for the D? Is your son aware?

John Smith : Please you can’t do that to me. My life will be ruined. I’ll give you whatever you want, please just don’t expose those pictures.

ME: I’ll send my account number to you & I expect to have 1, 000,000 Naira paid in before 4pm today

John Smith : What?! A million Naira? Are you crazy?

ME: yeah, Crazy enough to send these pictures to the press.

John Smith: ok, ok, I’ll head to the bank right away just send your bank details but u have to promise me you’ll delete those pictures right away.

ME: You have my word

Hung up.

Looking back, I think I should have asked for more money. Well, I wasn’t the type that deprived pleasure in black mailing blacks like me, I barely acted on my instincts. Besides, a million Naira wouldn't hurt him much, though his money won't make much difference to the amount I have, but just had to teach him a lesson. I got to Gombe expecting to be a million naira richer. The following day which was friday, It was past 2pm already still no credit alert from my bank. I waited patiently, looking at my phone every now and again expecting ‘that’ text message to arrive.

You know that feeling you get when expecting a bank deposit and your phone rings alerting you to a text message? Then the feeling you get after opening the message only to find a text from a random four digit number telling you to subscribe for Caller tunes, or some other unnecessary information.

Well at exactly 3:55pm my phone rang. It was indeed a text message! I heaved a huge sigh of relief & opened the message. Lo & behold! it was a text message from JOHN SMITH…

The text read…

“If you think you can blackmail me with a silly picture, think again. If u dare expose that pic, I promise to make your life a living hell. I talked to my lawyers & they have assured me that we can make a case & sue. So I’ll see you in court if you decide to act foolish”

Wow! I wasn’t expecting things to take this turn. It’s likely to get ugly. What’s up with rich folks threatening the poor with lawyers these days? Whenever shit hits the fan, they call their lawyers. Now John Smith was threatening with one like I couldn’t afford to get a lawyer myself.

Mumu guy, likes he thinks money is my problem.

‘Pro bono’, so… I thought about putting an end to this deal & just get on with my life but then I pictured what that life would be like. I know life can be easy, and I know opportunity come but once, blah blah blah , just have to make money out of this GAY guy!

I saw modeling as a ticket to the good life, a way out of idleness, a way to catch fun, look good. Now I can’t have that because of a bloody gay! Don’t get me wrong, I’m not homophobic, even though I don’t like them very much, I believe everyone’s got their life to live & it’s one’s right to live as he pleases, just don’t involve me in your lifestyle. I’m
totally against the unfair treatment currently meted out to the gay population in our society. I thought the bill passed by the Legislative was against Gay marriages and not copulation? I believe its nobody’s business where a man chooses to put his dick. So why harass these people for what they do privately, in their bedrooms? If we decide to play the moral or religious card by saying God frowns at their acts then, shouldn’t there be a ban on
premarital sex entirely, be it same sex or with the opposite sex? God frowns at sexual immorality, period! We’re just being hypocrites if you ask me. My bane with John Smith isn’t because he’s gay but that he tried
to take advantage of me & I don’t forgive easily. I needed to teach him a lesson, if not for myself, then for the sake of other aspiring models out there.

He messed with the wrong cat this time. So I took out my laptop and edited the picture using photo shop, making his face blurry so he couldn’t be identified. I posted the picture
on twitter with the caption:

‘Supermodel! I think @John_Smith should sign this dude to his agency…lol”

Within 3 hours, the picture was trending on twitter. It had gotten loads of retweets & hilarious comments.

Twitter was buzzing! Some tweeps even suggested I exposed the dude. Then I received a mention that surprised me much. John Smith replied my tweet with the words

‘LMAO… Are you serious?’.

I replied immediately saying

‘You bet I am! I’ll even post the real pic so you can see how cute he is’.

My phone rang instantly, It was John Smith calling

ME: Hello

John Smith : What the Bleep is wrong with you?

ME: yo John! I was expecting a thank you. I just made you famous on twitter! At least by tomorrow after I expose the real picture, you’ll be a star.

John Smith : You must be crazy young man!

ME: imagine the publicity you’ll get! You’ll probably feature on every entertainment blog

John Smith : Well if you choose to carry on with this insanity, you’ll hear from my lawyers tomorrow

ME: Oh please! The lawyer threats again? I bet your wife would be very supportive and the companies you do business with would be more than…

WTF?! He hung up on me! Now he’s left me no choice. I know this isn’t the most honorable thing to do but then show me 1 wealthy person who got to that position in
life by being honourable. When life throws you lemons, you make lemonade right? Well I enjoy mine with a little vodka in it. I saw this as an opportunity & what is it they say about opportunity? It cometh but once. I wasn’t going to let this one chance pass me by. John Smith must have read my mind because at that instant my phone rang. It was a text message.

‘Alright you win. I’ll pay the money 1st thing tomorrow. Please delete that picture. PLEASE’

After reading that text, I was ecstatic! It felt like my favourite team just won the champions league. No, scratch that. It felt like Rita Dominic just agreed to marry me! I’ve always had a crush on that one hey… story for another day. I could barely sleep that night.
You know when you’re anticipating something great the next day, you tend to wake up early and it appears as if time is ‘taking its time’. I slept at about 1am. I woke up thinking it was dawn already. I checked the time, it was
4am! I couldn’t fall back asleep. I stayed awake chatting and hustling online with my maye's.

After about what seemed like 3 hours, I checked the time again, it was 4:30am!
I decided to stop waiting & keep my mind busy. I decided to listen to a music that would ginger my spirit, because I like my music
extremely loud. So I plugged in my headphone. I figured I was in the mood to listen to Fela. I went to the fridge & got out a small bottle of Alomo bitters. Why do people bother with this drink really? The taste is
horrible! It doesn’t smell good but we love it, don’t we? I think the idea of a ‘healthy high’ was what got me started & the small size of the bottle meant you drank in moderation. Plus given the price, it is a no-brainer!

So I sat up in bed sipping my Alomo, listening to Fela, waiting for dawn. I visited my favourite sport sites. I did virtually everything to past time. I even visited Dopepopz, I read some cool stories Teenage Love, Shade of Lust, later I got bored and sleepy read the stories, I then switch to check out some gist via linda ikeji's blog, the trending posts weren't captivating to me, I find most of these ‘gossips’ to be super annoying. With stories like ‘See Don Jazzy’s tweet to Tiwa Savage’; ‘Wizkid takes selfie in a toilet"; ‘Davido bought a new shoe’; ‘See the food Tonto Dike
ate last night’. How does any of that amount to gossip?

Why would I care about the food Tonto Dike had for dinner? Most of these amateur bloggers should find something else to do with their time. They all recycle the same stories. They copy a story, word for word, from
Linda Ikeji’s blog & post on theirs not bothering to edit or name their source. Little wonder as to why she’s making so much money & they aren’t. Professionalism
pays.

My conscience was slowly catching up with me. There’s no honour in blackmail a naija guy like me, we all know it's hard to make money in this country, if you ain't a politician. I was beginning to have second thoughts, then this particular song came on, GENTLEMAN. In the words of the great Abami Eda I realised “I no be gentleman at all”. I know Fela wasn’t encouraging anybody to do wrong with that
song but then its like a parable. Whichever translation works for you. Its funny the lengths we’ll go to justify a wrong deed. I quickly brushed that thought aside. I aint giving up now, not when I’m this close to getting paid.
At last, the first light of dawn. I got out of bed, to my cloths to the dry cleaner, then, came back home, took a chilled Fuman Juice in the refrigerator, sat on my bed with my pc, and I hustle on, while sipping the Juice in a cup.

At about 9am, I received a text
from John Smith.

‘I’m on my way to the bank. Please confirm your details again’

I duly obliged. Now I was waiting for that all important text, the credit alert. It took a little over 20 minutes for the sacred alert to come in. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw the figures 1,000,000. Maga don pay.


Then I received another text. This time it was
from John Smith.

‘I’ve paid the money into your account. I trust you’ll do the right thing by deleting the picture & my phone number as well. Don’t contact me again & If by any means, the picture is exposed & I lose everything I’ve worked for, I’ll find you & I’ll kill you’

That sunk in. I believed every word of that text. I quickly deleted the picture. There’s no point keeping it & I wouldn’t want anyone having access to it because I didn’t want to find out if he was bluffing or not. I want
to believe ‘hell hath no fury like a gay nigga scorned’.

I received another text. From John Smith yet again.

‘You know Karma is a bi-ch right

To be continued.


Having gain that much from John Smith.
I partied and mingle with Alex and James and some couple of yahoo guys in gombe.
Notwithstanding, I enjoyed every bit of my stay in Gomber especially now I had funds to spend, albeit ill-gotten. Nevertheless, John Smith's last message still troubled
me…

“You know Karma’s a bitch right?”

KARMA? What does Karma really mean? Last time I checked, it’s a Bhuddist belief that whatever you do comes back to you. Well, thank God I’m not a Bhuddist. If anything, John Smith got served by Karma, I was just
the delivery guy.

We were in a club, around GSU, breaking bottles as usual. When a older guy of around forty came in. He was keenly staring at me in particular. He seem like and igbo guy.

Later on, most of my guys were already tipsy, and I don't get tipsy not until the seventh bottle. I then approached the guy, guess I had the courage due to what I had drank.

Me : hey man, what you looking at ?

Strange man : boy have your sit. (Pointing to a chair beside him.

I obliged and sat down by him.

Strange man : young man, my name is chidi, and I was also once like you.

Me : mister I don't get.

Chidi : with the way you are spending spree and talking, I know what you are.


Me : what am I ?

Chidi : a wire wire ofcousre.

Me: (shocked) his it that obvious.

Chidi : I told you I was once like you.

Me : (took a cursory look at him) then what happened?

Chidi : let go outside, the walls has hears.

As a yoruba guy, I understood that statement.
I followed him out. He pointed to a green car. I followed him and we both sat in.

Chidi : well let me tell you my story so you learn. I am chidi like I said earlier, what people used to know as yahoo , a term used to defraud unsuspecting and gullible persons, especially foreigners, through the internet, has gone beyond mere conversation and emotional chat. During my time yahoo plus was the trend in cybercrime world, as operators have
resorted to using fetish means to hypnotize their victims in order to get what they want from them. I ventured into cyber crime eight years ago, after several attempts to gain admission into the university failed.
Unfortunately, five years down the line, I could only get myself this Nigerian used
vehicle.

My sudden change of mind, followed a startling discovery that human parts were being used to prepare concoction that would
hypnotise victims.

“ You may not believe me but it is true.
Those who are into yahoo plus use charm to
hypnotize their victims. This is because the
ordinary yahoo no longer yield the desired result.

Our targets are getting wiser and no longer fall
prey .

“When I noticed that I was not making any
headway in yahoo business, I decided to inquire from some of my friends who were in same business but were living better off.

To my surprise, I was made to understand that
the in-thing was yahoo plus. I decided to embark on a journey to Benin Republic in the company of Chuks, Odinakachukwu and Chionye. There, we met a herbalist who told us to buy three live cocks and other items which he used to prepare some concoction for us. After that, we were asked to stand in front of the shrine,while the herbalist chanted incantations that would enhance our success in yahoo plus.

“As we left for Nigeria, we were given some
concoction which the herbalist said were
prepared with human parts. We were asked to
put the concoction in our mouths whenever we wanted to type or discuss with our victims.
But when I got home, I became restive. I
remembered my mum’s admonition never to go into anything fetish but to serve the almighty God. I kept the concoction away and watched as events unfolded.

Three months later, one of us Chuks, made 3000 dollars But Odinakachuckwu lost his younger brother who went to use his laptop. The instruction of the herbalist was that no one except him, should use his laptop. Just as we were smarting from that, Chionye lost his girlfriend.

“I decided to quit at that point because I did not want anyone to die on my account. I am
therefore decided to quit yahoo finally".

I broke my laptop into pieces and here I am living like a freelance.
But I know I have a settled mind.

Me : well with all you have said, I am not into yahoo plus, neither would I shed any blood.
I just get lucky and I understand the game better.

Chidi : but do you know karma would come for you one day?

Me : it's not possible, am not doing anything too wrong.

Chidi: what you sow you reap.

Me : alaye enough of the preaching. You are the one who wants to be like this. Have got to ball. Mister double your hustle, no time for lamentation.

Chidi : wetin my eyes done see, wetin my hears don hear, in this game. You don't know.

Me : mister have a good night.

I stepped out his car, slammed the door, and went back to join my guys.

Ish what's with this Karma of a thing sef.


Getting back home that night I reflected on what chidi said, though I’ve always had my reservations on cheating people online especially vulnerable women, which was why I switched from dating to goods and apartment, but I had gotten to that point in life where money must be made. So I continueD
my journey to been a Yahoo Boy.

Two months left for my passing out parade.
So I knew I had limited time, I had to do comprehensive dating now, to see who I could be my way out of the country.

I thought miss rose was the one. But she wasn't replying my mails any longer.

Then I met a new zealand woman on one of the popular dating site. She seem rich with the pictures on her profile.
I claimed to be christopher williams, a guy based in malaysia. I used my real pictures, because by that time, I was almost fresh and very light, due to the modeling treatments have had days back.

we started chatting, and in matter of days she was into me, I devoted my time to chat her, I'd wake up all night to chat with her.

She fell in love with me. My first payment from her was when I claimed to be in possession of gemstone worth $18,050,000, which he purportedly inherited from my father.
With time I was able to make of $267, 000, (about N53 million) from her. Yet she never suspected anything. She was lost in the love I showered on her.

Then she initiated that I come over to New. Zealand.

To be continued.

Due to much traffic my site is currently down.
And I have to upgrade, so I'm. Sorting that out currently.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by kazytoti: 8:33am On Jul 07, 2016
Thank for he update. It worth it
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by kikayboss(m): 1:20pm On Jul 07, 2016
lol.... @iphekitan ...i visited your site and saw what its been saying....and was like "Iphekitan don blow"......NYC work ......awaiting more updates jejely
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by tobianodino(m): 2:41pm On Jul 07, 2016
off to new zealand...nice man
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Psamist1805(m): 5:00pm On Jul 07, 2016
Next pleaae am addicted to this story
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Iphekitan(m): 8:50pm On Jul 07, 2016
kikayboss:
lol.... @iphekitan ...i visited your site and saw what its been saying....and was like "Iphekitan don blow"......NYC work ......awaiting more updates jejely

Funny you bro. Well the traffic we got was just way too much than our budget. A bandwidth for a the whole month of july was exhausted in six days.

So just trying to upgrade to an unlimited hosting plan

2 Likes

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by iamkingzlee(m): 9:02pm On Jul 07, 2016
Chaiii!!! I've missed much o cry
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by RonnyG(f): 10:01pm On Jul 07, 2016
This guy is a Unique writer, he makes everything seem real and he keeps saying it's fiction.

i can't help but to imagine and relate different personnels with this story.

kudos to you bro.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Iphekitan(m): 10:44am On Jul 08, 2016
RonnyG:
This guy is a Unique writer, he makes everything seem real and he keeps saying it's fiction.

i can't help but to imagine and relate different personnels with this story.

kudos to you bro.

Thanks
Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by Iphekitan(m): 12:31pm On Jul 08, 2016
Thanks guys my site is up and active, I would try and round up the story this coming week, thanks for the motivation so far.

1 Like

Re: [story] My Life As A Yahoo Boy by pharuqchulker(m): 4:59pm On Jul 08, 2016
nyc 1....

(1) (2) (3) ... (25) (26) (27) (28) (29) (30) (31) (Reply)

Twine (A Drama Series) / To Hate And Love(story That Touches The Heart) By Adaobi Marianne / Tarasha 2 - The Return For Revenge

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 79
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.