obiak4:

Sorry are same, Just asking because you sound like the wife sister or mother
Op if you take advice from people like this prepare for your obituary in 2weeks
If she get to have an infinitesimal idea that you have heard that recording you are dead pls believe me because from your narrative the whole family is against you,
Your best bet is get a copy of the recordings tell your family members and her family members you want to celebrate your union back if you have strong men hired to restrain her family members because They might get violence during the meeting
Play the recordings everyone would know where he stands

Eketem:



Let the marriage end if that is what would happen. Why do we want to shield this nonsense? Because a woman is involved we are suddenly concerned about home restoration.

These witches would have continued this torture for years if he had not heard this recording.

Let the whole family come let them seperate temporarily let her go and think about her actions

elektra:


My thoughts exactly. If physical assault was involved the automatic solution is divorce, but since the scars in this case cannot be seen physically, emphasis is on home restoration.

In my opinion, what this worse than physical assault and I would advice anyone to stay as far away from such an individual as possible.

goldbim:
So sorry to say this sir,she is on a MISSION..on the verge of destroying already..else,why'll a woman want to run down her husband with the help of her siblings?follow your heart..ija fara lewu...

Eketem:



Let the marriage end if that is what would happen. Why do we want to shield this nonsense? Because a woman is involved we are suddenly concerned about home restoration.

These witches would have continued this torture for years if he had not heard this recording.

Let the whole family come let them seperate temporarily let her go and think about her actions

bellong:
@Op,

Do you have a copy of the recordings?

Keep your calm for now, let your head be cleared first and don't do anything stupid as you may spoil a good case.

Your wife is naive and foolish like a lamb taken to the slaughter's slab. Her sisters are obviously jealous of her marriage and are pretending to help her conquer you with a view to destroying her marriage.

I want to believe her sisters' marriage are not in order internally and they are jealous of your mum's relationship with her. Your wife trusted them too much for being siblings not to mislead her but not knowing they have a different plan. Your wife lacks knowledge, discernment and good judgement.

The point she said this is what I am waiting for when you pushed her away is a giveaway that she was acting a foolish script she doesn't know the end.

Many will want you to send her packing but I don't think it is the right thing to do. Prior to this event, you have not found any bad behaviour in and with her. Take this as a first offense.

Does it mean you shouldn't address it, by all means do.

Don't change your attitude or behaviour to her, don't give her any idea to suspect anything till weekend. During the weekend, play the recordings for her and walk away. Prior to this, book an appointment with her parents alone. Then take the recordings to them for them to listen. Don't say anything, let them do the talking afterwards. Please don't involve your parents as it will crush them..

Your wife is not a lost cause, her sisters are. She needs wisdom.

May God grant you wisdom to pull through this

byvan03:




What if the OP doesn't want his marriage to end? If he wanted to be divorced he won't be asking for your counsel. Nobody is shielding anyone as I don't do gender sentiments. Any marriage that becomes a play field for all will always shatter to pieces. If he wants the marriage, it is not irreparable as his wife is being manipulated.

Eketem:


Who talked about divorce? You said he should not show his family, same family she went to lie to and insult him too. That is what I am talking about not divorce. This is not a matter to be swept under the carpet it must be thoroughly handled by all the people she involved

pharmagba:
I feel very sorry for you, but a man got to be a man
Firstly I don't know the real sickness and precise age of your daughter but one thing you must know is it is not good for a wife to have too much free time as it is a veritable devils workshop you ought to ensure she is working; open a shop for her or impregnate her so she continue baby nursing,

Now to your findings first of all copy it somewhere else like your phone and then confront her with it, play everything to her hearing, pause at intervals to ask her what you've done wrong, please don't be aggressive or angry; control your emotions. Ask her what she has to say.

Let her know it is betrayal, threaten her you will summon a family meeting of both family and see her reaction.
If or not she apologies don't tell anybody either your family or her. NEVER.. It must not come from your mouth.
But make a stand none of her family members should have your respect. They must never come to your house. Don't give reasons, don't pick or answer their calls until you see full repentance in her. which must be after like a year. .it is her family that must bear the brunt and punishment Nothing more

Don't divorce her she is your wife, folly is in the mind of a woman. I know it will definitely leave a scar in your relationship, forgive her still and try to let go, call her from work and be a good father and husband.

priceaction:

If you refuse to act fast and keep nursing pains, you will sleep one day and wake up paralyzed .And that will be the beginning of much woes for you.

byvan03:




Showing the family will ruin everything.

byvan03:




Showing the family will ruin everything.

Timbuktou:


Everything is not already ruined? If the man had been slapping her around unprovoked upon advice from his elder brothers would you be so 'level-headed'? Lol, nairaland

Eketem:



No Ma showing the family is not what will ruin everything, what ruined everything was the stupid decision she made with her sisters and their idiotic actions.

Let her face the responsibility of her actions. Same way we would not tell a woman to hide physical abuse is the same way this minute shouldn't hide this emotional abuse.

Actions have consequences

bellong:
@Op,

Do you have a copy of the recordings?

Keep your calm for now, let your head be cleared first and don't do anything stupid as you may spoil a good case.

Your wife is naive and foolish like a lamb taken to the slaughter's slab. Her sisters are obviously jealous of her marriage and are pretending to help her conquer you with a view to destroying her marriage.

I want to believe her sisters' marriage are not in order internally and they are jealous of your mum's relationship with her. Your wife trusted them too much for being siblings not to mislead her but not knowing they have a different plan. Your wife lacks knowledge, discernment and good judgement.

The point she said this is what I am waiting for when you pushed her away is a giveaway that she was acting a foolish script she doesn't know the end.

Many will want you to send her packing but I don't think it is the right thing to do. Prior to this event, you have not found any bad behaviour in and with her. Take this as a first offense.

Does it mean you shouldn't address it, by all means do.

Don't change your attitude or behaviour to her, don't give her any idea to suspect anything till weekend. During the weekend, play the recordings for her and walk away. Prior to this, book an appointment with her parents alone. Then take the recordings to them for them to listen. Don't say anything, let them do the talking afterwards. Please don't involve your parents as it will crush them..

Your wife is not a lost cause, her sisters are. She needs wisdom.

May God grant you wisdom to pull through this

byvan03:




You are comparing outright physical violence with this? Enjoy your argument alone.

byvan03:




Let the man handle this, let him dish the consequences at his own terms. Telling the family equals the end, I doubt he wants an end yet. You don't first smash to pieces what you intend to repair. I totally agree with Bellong on this one.

Timbuktou:


Hahaha. Let me see:
1. Divulging family secrets.
2. Conspiring to ridicule one's husband.
3. Conspiring to levy false accusations against one's husband.
4. Conspiring to run a parallel family behind husband's back.
5. Deliberately falsely accusing and damaging husband's image.
6. Manufacturing a PHYSICAL and verbal altercation from thin air, in the morning.
7. Disparaging husband's mother and family.

How dare I compare all these with "outright physical abuse" the height of domestic disputes. Byvan, no offence, you sound daft.

byvan03:




No, I can't be categorised as daft just because a man your age suffers from severe diahhoer of the fingers, impaired enough to type like a suckling. If you can't put your emotions in check while having an objective discourse, please go to hell!! Reserve your Agbero tantrums for whom it may concern.

Eketem:



No Ma showing the family is not what will ruin everything, what ruined everything was the stupid decision she made with her sisters and their idiotic actions.

Let her face the responsibility of her actions. Same way we would not tell a woman to hide physical abuse is the same way this minute shouldn't hide this emotional abuse.

Actions have consequences