GoldenJAT:
call a family meeting sharply....giv them no room 2 suspect that you are up2 something,do make sure every1 of her siblings are there ...as well as urs.. play those records for them... and divorce her.. the marriage is over already... Just tell urself d hard truth.... u married a wolf in sheep clothing... that family is a cult,prepare 2c and hear more than u can take.... ur time start's now.. I personally be following you up.. don't mind having ur number... stories like these one.. is what makes men treat even d good women with disdain. ...it breaks my heart 2 know that those that can clean ur tears are actually d ones that will make u cry blood.. u will come out stronger. the Lord is ur strength!

bukatyne:


I find it strange however not impossible that she became evil overnight.

If he truly has done nothing wrong, he should seperate from her awhile.

She can destroy/kill him.

pharmagba:


Is that the only thing that matters to you in all this issue on ground?
This is a classical case of the folly I'm talking about in women.

Anyway,I don't know the level of your English, but I used 'folly' figuratively, it is like your kid sister did something wrong and you're angry and someone said to you 'don't be angry she is just a child'
The objective is for you to overlook the offence. I hope you've gotten some wisdom

pharmagba:


I beg to disagree with you.
Please the evidences are no longer important. It has achieved it purpose you can delete them. Don't listen to them again but don't tell your wife you have deleted them.

If you will listen to my candid advice don't tell even your dad.
By the way all this one that you are afraid of 'rat poison' cut the crap off your mind. Don't live your life in that morbid fear, she will not kill you, women had done worse things and they still forge ahead. Even if she does, one day all of us will die and face the great judgement. Relax your mind your wife loves you alive

vicchi12:

This tops the worst idea I've ever read in myentire life! Like don't you think this people are possessed? Like I'm a lady! But this betrays logic. Sir, one testicle or not, love or not, run!!!!!! Even God will forgive you. This is evil! Divorce is legal even in Christianity on grounds like this.

Exlusive:
From all I haVe heard this is what I would like to believe.. I would like to believe deep down in your wife's heart she still loves you the probelm is that she is being influence by some folks in her family, I would suggest you have a long discussion with d gals father( supposing his is the captain of his family) play him the evidence you have and ask him to help you deal with the TERRORISTS from his camp go to your dad play him the evidence and ask for guidance then haVe your long well planned discussion with your wife reminding her of how you both started and how its is in both of your interest and your daughters interest that you stay together..do forget to pray for her and your also because this is an attack on your family and existence...divorce is not an option yet remember that those who are talKing in her ears do not really matter in your family of 3.may God help you find wisdom and strength in this time..this is my little wisdom..

pharmagba:
I feel very sorry for you, but a man got to be a man
Firstly I don't know the real sickness and precise age of your daughter but one thing you must know is it is not good for a wife to have too much free time as it is a veritable devils workshop you ought to ensure she is working; open a shop for her or impregnate her so she continue baby nursing,

Now to your findings first of all copy it somewhere else like your phone and then confront her with it, play everything to her hearing, pause at intervals to ask her what you've done wrong, please don't be aggressive or angry; control your emotions. Ask her what she has to say.

Let her know it is betrayal, threaten her you will summon a family meeting of both family and see her reaction.
If or not she apologies don't tell anybody either your family or her. NEVER.. It must not come from your mouth.
But make a stand none of her family members should have your respect. They must never come to your house. Don't give reasons, don't pick or answer their calls until you see full repentance in her. which must be after like a year. .it is her family that must bear the brunt and punishment Nothing more

Don't divorce her she is your wife, folly is in the mind of a woman. I know it will definitely leave a scar in your relationship, forgive her still and try to let go, call her from work and be a good father and husband.

pharmagba:
I feel very sorry for you, but a man got to be a man
Firstly I don't know the real sickness and precise age of your daughter but one thing you must know is it is not good for a wife to have too much free time as it is a veritable devils workshop you ought to ensure she is working; open a shop for her or impregnate her so she continue baby nursing,

Now to your findings first of all copy it somewhere else like your phone and then confront her with it, play everything to her hearing, pause at intervals to ask her what you've done wrong, please don't be aggressive or angry; control your emotions. Ask her what she has to say.

Let her know it is betrayal, threaten her you will summon a family meeting of both family and see her reaction.
If or not she apologies don't tell anybody either your family or her. NEVER.. It must not come from your mouth.
But make a stand none of her family members should have your respect. They must never come to your house. Don't give reasons, don't pick or answer their calls until you see full repentance in her. which must be after like a year. .it is her family that must bear the brunt and punishment Nothing more

Don't divorce her she is your wife, folly is in the mind of a woman. I know it will definitely leave a scar in your relationship, forgive her still and try to let go, call her from work and be a good father and husband.

fem29:
Devguru, I do not understand WHY you did not ask WHY she did this. Why did you not get to the bottom of the whole matter. It is not about her 'begging '. I don't know what it is with nigerians and begging. You do the wrong thing knowingly then you start begging when caught.

You are simply brushing it under the carpet and it is still going to rear it's ugly head again. If should doesn't have a reason for doing this, then you should divorce her cos she must be EVIL

oyetpel:

@op, this person eound like one of your wife elder sister.

pharmagba:

Divorce and come and marry you?
Divorce and you will take care of his children?
Do you take divorce as a one day walk?

Please reason with your head. It is marriage we are talking about.

DevGuru:
UPDATE

I sincerely appreciate the fact that almost everyone here regards this matter a very serious one, this alone warms my heart a little. I have read through every single comment on this thread and I appreciate everyone. I couldn't take down the names of those whose comments aligned with my aim of keeping my marriage, but I thank everyone all the same. I realised from a myriad of comments that informing my people will mean a beginning of the end for my marriage. My daughter too is a major consideration. Above all, she's carrying another 6 week pregnancy. I have therefore decided to eliminate (or maybe suspend as the case turns out) informing any of my family members. I decided to play the records to her while I added some words. I started by telling her that my love for her made me decide to talk to her and not to anyone who would possibly fuel separation in my home like her sisters have done. She was shocked because she had never heard any allegation from me towards her elder ones before. She thought I was crazy and I wanted to bring up what was not. Then I played a little while I summarised the wildest words from her sisters which I heard in other discussion. For the FIRST time, my wife couldn't deny ANYTHING as she was convinced beyond doubt that she had been finished. She cried bitterly as I talked further but did not know what to do. But what pained me further was that it was obvious she cried because she saw that I was going to turn to an emperor and ridicule and justifiably disgrace her elderly advisers, NOT really because I was betrayed.

Right there, I was looking for a particular one to play and then even heard what I didn't hear before. Her eldest sister said she had discussed with some other siblings to intensify efforts towards her job search that as soon as she gets a job, she would have to be sending money home for them to create something for her in their town so she could come settle. She cried further as she heard it too. I told her the implications of what she had done to me with her people and then left her in the room because my baby girl was disturbing me. Anytime our voices are not friendly, she interrupts and cries for attention. I took my daughter to the living room and was playing with her.

After about 1 hour, she came to the living room and fell down before me as she cried further, saying "I'm sorry". Then I asked her to state exactly what she was begging me for - her betrayal or her siblings' offence. She knows me very well, she quickly said her betrayal (even though I knew that wasn't the primary cause of her heavy heart). Then I told her I was willing to forgive her in the spirit of upholding my marital vows to her. I explained further that for the sake of our daughter and the unborn one(s), I was willing to forgive her and build a stronger home with her. She felt a little relief knowing that she was getting back into me. I then said "but from this minute, I'm in a ruthless war with anyone, I repeat, ANYONE who is determined to break my home as I now have to guard our togetherness jealously". I stated further that the only thing I would hold against her was if she ever stood in my way. Just as if a thunder just struck and killed someone dear to her, she cried loudly again saying "she had finished her life". She said she would be the one to suffer in the war I just declared and that I should just allow her to call all of them and tell them never to meddle into our affairs again. I refused to fall for that trick and held my stance that my resolve was not going to change and I walked away. Since then till this moment, she has been like a mourning widow. When it was time for food, we ate together as usual and I've been the one trying to talk now. She hasn't spoken with anyone on phone since then, although I don't know about Whatsapp or BBM chat. Now she's waiting for the next available opportunity when she could plead for her sisters again... only God knows for how long the waiting would be. Let me quickly mention that she sent me an SMS from the bedroom a while ago: I CAN SEE THE HANDWORK OF THE DEVIL IN THIS WHOLE MATTER, PLS LET'S TRY TO RESIST THE DEVIL THIS TIME SO HE CAN FLEE FROM OUR HOME. I BEG YOU IN THE NAME OF GOD DEAR".... I simply replied from the living room: "ON THE CONTRARY HONEY, I CAN SEE THE HAND OF GOD. CAN'T YOU SEE IT?"

On another note, I do not want to assume that she will not tell her sisters, although it might take a while because she knew they would rebuke her for delivering them into the hands of their 'enemy' through Call Recorder. But before she informs them, I think I'd follow someone's advice here too that I should reveal it to someone who could keep it away from my mum and sisters, which is surely my Dad - just to put someone in the know, in case I begin to smell rat poison in my food... lol. What do you think?

Cc: ezechueze, Mafking, AccidentalGenius, RadicallyBlunt, ojun50, GoldenJAT, olempe, LuveU2, goldbim, phabulous88, pharmagba, 2goodbobo, PezzoNovante, marvelous000, Tritri, IRserveMyComent, AlienStar, STENON, krak101, AccidentalGenius, danduchi, samsam2019, uchedydy, Ruemufaith, sashishalom, ednut1, bakynes, sumborr, general111, byvan03, obiak4, Eketem, obiak4, emekachimek, elektra, priceaction, segzy0i, MizzD, richyfunky, bellong, nnamdibig, Timbuktou, TheArchangel, tearoses, andromida, HaneefahRN, TV01, Amelian, WellEndowed, Jethrolite, baeboo, trishapal, drss, Donemmy, Ujoan, pcguru1, Tochex101, pastorpussy, crackhaus, ranktzy, cococandy, mysticgal, toksbisola, Okikiki, succourplanet, Darla, ummeey, kaboninc, BiggyB242, Ishilove

pharmagba:


Can you state categorically, the offence the wife committed?

The most mortal sin that give room for divorce is adultery, she didn't do such.

Give this marriage an opportunity to come out stronger than it has ever been

saasala:


What do I think?....It is the worst decision of your life and I can guarantee that you are a dead man walking. She will finally tell everything to her sisters and you will die, they will kill you...DIVORCE her now or you die.

pharmagba:


Can you state categorically, the offence the wife committed?

The most mortal sin that give room for divorce is adultery, she didn't do such.

Give this marriage an opportunity to come out stronger than it has ever been

crackhaus:
Manipulative women who don't even recognize when they're being dishonest are a ticking time bomb, you don't keep one too close.

I dont know about you OP, but my kind of personality seems to be different going by majority of the comments here.

First off, what are you even doing here seeking for advise?
The moment you found that recording was the moment your marriage ended, no need to mince words - anything you're doing now is just you hanging on to the strings of an already broken union.

If it were me, everybody will hear those recordings...and by everybody, I mean EVERYBODY in both families that cares enough to make it their business.

Im sorry, but to me I believe you've lost your wife...I dont even know how you're able to still live with and look at her after this - this is far worse than infidelity.

oyetpel:

If we really want to know the truth and the op actually need genuine comments, we need his long story that he has cut short. Like some people are asking, why will the bitch change overnight? Someone you dated for many years. What is the op not telling us?.

saasala:


What do I think?....It is the worst decision of your life and I can guarantee that you are a dead man walking. She will finally tell everything to her sisters and you will die, they will kill you...DIVORCE her now or you die.

Fawklicant:


Best advice. I cannot live with a woman who plans with her sisters to live a separate life and build something for herself away from the husband.
I cannot live with a woman who shows remorse not for her actions but because she knows her sisters' complicity in the plot has been exposed.
I cannot stand a woman who displays such disdain for her life's mate and colludes with her sisters to make mockery of her husband and her family
I cannot stand with a woman who could poison or assassinate her husband over petty and mundane ish

Her sisters did not influence her, she ran to them for support. She already had ish mapped out from day 1. Play the damn tape for everyone, and I mean everyone to hear because that marriage ended as soon as it began. If my christian folks advice against divorce, my you are a Yoruba man, marry a second wife. I would under these circumstances and the moment I do, she gone bro! Either ways, she gots to go.

pharmagba:


I beg to disagree with you.
Please the evidences are no longer important. It has achieved it purpose you can delete them. Don't listen to them again but don't tell your wife you have deleted them.

If you will listen to my candid advice don't tell even your dad.
By the way all this one that you are afraid of 'rat poison' cut the crap off your mind. Don't live your life in that morbid fear, she will not kill you, women had done worse things and they still forge ahead. Even if she does, one day all of us will die and face the great judgement. Relax your mind your wife loves you alive