This is a fact based on what is happening in my family presently.


Around last week Fridays afternoon i saw my mom hiding her phone from me at first, i didn't even bother but when I discovered she was sending messages to a unknown number i started putting notice to it. This happened till late in the night like around 2 am, i was awake and I went to the sitting room only to see her washing clothes in the laundry and simultaneously chatting with someone and this is very unusual of her but my father didn't notice notice anyways.

On Saturday Last week the following morning i heard her making calls that she will be there by afternoon i felt like confronting her but i felt that she might just be going to her place of work. Afternoon came and she said she was going to another town for a naming ceremony we didn't mind. I left the house and i came back around 9pm and discovered that she wasn't back yet so i called her and she told me she won't be coming back that night then i knew she was up to something. I listened to the background very much and I noticed it isn't a party stuff or anything.

On Sunday she came back and I was mad but i just kept mute as i thought that I was not in a position to confront her.

Fast forward to today's early morning around 4 am. I heard my dad's angry voice he was very angry with my mum at first I thought she broke something in the room but i later heard my mum pleading that he didn't have sex with the man. After much contemplating, i went out of my room to the sitting room where they were and i saw my mom holding her phone i sensed that, her act has been exposed. My father left us there and went to his room. I confronted my mom and told her that i knew she didn't go for a naming ceremony the previous week and she was kind of surprised and she asked me how i got to know but I didn't reply her.
My dad came out of his room and asked her to come inside. Like after about two hours, my mom came to call me and I went to their room and dad sat me down and told me that he saw a text message on my mom phone the sender said they were to meet the day before but she my mom didn't meet him. My mom said the man is just a boss at his office and nothing more. So dad told me that I am his witness that if such happens again that he is going to divorce my mom. Well, my mom insisted that she didn't have sex with the man

I have 3 siblings and but they are still small am the first born am about clocking 20 years of age.

What should I do please?

....

I wish i can advise you, But your dad should handle the situation na....

All you need do is PRAY... That God will touch your mama and give your Dad the self will not to reason Divorce..



All is Well

No comment bro, other nairalanders with nice ideas might come online. If i should say what i ve in mind( decrypting her whatsapp) dats if na whatsapp you guys might not like d outcome.

Why is your Dad involving you as if your Mom is into polyandrous union with both of you?



Let your Dad and Mum handle their issue and leave you out of it. You are to you for this burden abeg.

Chai!

Hmmm..absurd

For the sake of your younger siblings and the sake of the unity of the whole family you have to forget your age in this issue and handle it like the man you'll one day be proud of.

There's a reason why God has let you in on all this.

On a wonderful night while everyone is asleep, call your mum to the sitting room and talk to her. Let her know the imminent danger she's putting you, your dad, your siblings and the family at large. See, there's no good in infidelity. The Bible says there's a way that seemeth right unto man but the end thereof is destruction, and one of such ways is infidelity. Let her know she'll only tear the family apart with her current ways. Whether she's had sex with the man or not she erred big time. Going to a place and lying. Not to mention she went their without informing your father.

On another night. Call your dad and also talk to him too. Tell him to work on himself. Probably there are things he might need to work on.

After sometime, on another night call the two of them and sit them down and talk to them pointing out reasons why the family must stay together.

I tell you the truth. Your parents will never see you like a 20 year old again.

A broken home is not the best. Do your best to mend this crack.

God shall strengthen you. Go to him for wisdom.

Wish you the best of luck

First of all, pray for her.. Show her love
be conscious of her movements...
If you have enough facts.. Then you may confront her with sense

TheArchangel:
Why is your Dad involving you as if your Mom is into polyandrous union with both of you?



Let your Dad and Mum handle their issue and leave you out of it. You are to you for this burden abeg.

y shldnt he involve hm? So dat tomao if he divorces her d boy shldnt b angry cus he knw wat happend from d beginnin dan waking up one morning to see dat dey r divorced den u begin to cus ur dad

Ur mom or ur wife

Marvel1206:
First of all, pray for her.. Show her love

be conscious of her movements...

If you have enough facts.. Then you may confront her with sense

Thanks for the advice, i just don't want my family to break.

Chazzyboy:
Ur mom or ur wife

My mom

BiafraBushBoy:


You see your life??

Lwkmd because of FTC bah hahahahaha pple wicked oo

Back to d matter,guy Abi na babe.....jst b cool,its hard to forget b to trust ur mum ever again Bt she's ur mum irrespective, so jst pretend as doe it Neva happened n leave ur parents to sort demselves out,I'm sure its not gonna happen again since she's bin bursted

BiafraBushBoy:


You see your life??

Lwkmd because of FTC bah hahahahaha pple wicked oo

Back to d matter,guy Abi na babe.....jst b cool,its hard to forget dis kinna tin and to trust ur mum ever again Bt she's ur mum irrespective, so jst pretend as doe it Neva happened n leave ur parents to sort demselves out,I'm sure its not gonna happen again since she's bin bursted

Sorry. There's nothing you can do.

You weren't there when your dad married your mom (I think).

So just carry on with your own life and hurry up with your studies so that you can quickly get a good job and be ready to provide an emotional base for your younger siblings in case sh*t hits the fan.

Truth is if one cheats in marriage it is very difficult to stop.

kikies:

Lwkmd because of FTC bah hahahahaha pple wicked oo

Back to d matter,guy Abi na babe.....jst b cool,its hard to forget b to trust ur mum ever again Bt she's ur mum irrespective, so jst pretend as doe it Neva happened n leave ur parents to sort demselves out,I'm sure its not gonna happen again since she's bin bursted

Yeah I know it my still happen again.
My dad and I don't really talk very well but, i want to send him a text message that such might still happen and he should not be too angry even though am really vexed at her.

Jackpal:

Thanks for the advice, i just don't want my family to break.

Then you have to find out if this is actually true before dad does..
Then personally talk to her

Jackpal:


Yeah I know it my still happen again.
My dad and I don't really talk very well but, i want to send him a text message that such[b] might still happen [/b]and he should not be too angry even though am really vexed at her.

At bolded u want it to happen again? I dnt understand u ooo
R u praying for such to happen again

Jackpal:


Yeah I know it my still happen again.
My dad and I don't really talk very well but, i want to send him a text message that such might still happen and he should not be too angry even though am really vexed at her.

You and your dad don't talk much and you're the firstson? CChange is the only constant thing. Start the talk now to mend this crack before it becomes broken.

You'll so hate yourself later in life knowing you could have done something about this but you decided to let it go because you were too young at 20.

When life gives us lemon, what do you do? Turn the lemons into lemonade.

Think!!!

I am not in a position to give you tangible advice but I have questions that are kind of off topic.
Any reason why your mum was doing the laundry at 2 a.m? Did you assist her in doing the laundry when you saw her?
I just find it interesting that someone with a grown kid is doing chores past midnight.

elektra:
I am not in a position to give you tangible advice but I have questions that are kind of off topic.
Any reason why your mum was doing the laundry at 2 a.m? Did you assist her in doing the laundry when you saw her?
I just find it interesting that someone with a grown kid is doing chores past midnight.

There was light and she decided to make use of it. She was using a washing machine. And simultaneously texting.

kikies:

At bolded u want it to happen again? I dnt understand u ooo R u praying for such to happen again

Am not praying for such to repeat itself

Jackpal:


There was light and she decided to make use of it. She was using a washing machine. And simultaneously texting.

I see.

Jackpal:


Yeah I know it my still happen again.
My dad and I don't really talk very well but, i want to send him a text message that such might still happen and he should not be too angry even though am really vexed at her.

Send him text that such might happen again? What sort of advice is that? How sure are you it will happen again?


This is really a 'disgusting' situation. . A woman that should be setting example for her kids...
Since they've involved you(which I find distasteful), you have to try and make peace and not telling your dad it might happen again...

Talk to your dad to forgive and give your mum a chance again, then speak to your mum to give your dad reasons to trust her again by way of her actions. .. let her know the bad implications her actions could have on your family and how sad you're about it...

You may also want to find out if there's anything that may have led your mum to doing such....

And please don't involve your younger siblings. ..

All the best Op and I hope peace returns to your family. .

Ioannes:
Sorry. There's nothing you can do.

You weren't there when your dad married your mom (I think).

So just carry on with your own life and hurry up with your studies so that you can quickly get a good job and be ready to provide an emotional base for your younger siblings in case sh*t hits the fan.

Truth is if one cheats in marriage it is very difficult to stop.

BEST ADVICE SO FAR?

THEY MARRIED ON THEIR OWN


PLAY NEUTRAL... FACE YOUR PERSONAL AND YOUNGER ONES LIFE AND CAREER

DONT TEACH YOUR PARENTS ABOUT THEIR LOVE LIFE


MAKE YOUR LIFE SET AND MAKE YOUR MONEY

I am happy your dad knows about it....

There's nothing u can do because ur dad i guess is active and still the head of the home....however, u can still tell ur mum not to break a home she and ur dad has build with great effort.

Tell her that when next she wants to SMS or answer the phone of that man,
<<<< she should remember how the society view an unfaithful woman...

<<<<<<that she should remember that ur dad will not keep calm about the truth.That he might let everyone know the reason...

<<<<<<<that when the storm comes, that man (lover) might not want to have anything to do with her..... because that's fact about cases of randy men.Their fantasies is to go with ladies that are hooked up or married.they loved the fact that they are stealing without being caught..But when the whole thing blew open.. the Fantasy dies a natural death...they began to tell her they were married, etc.. and they proceed to another girl...

<<<<<<< Finally tell her that if she loses ur dad due to that promiscuous life style, she will not see u again...

Do not listen to any one that says it does not concern u. u are a product of that union....You are 20....Pychologically it will concern u and your siblings in future if anything should happen ....if there's anything u can do to remedy
the situation, please do it.....

I guess people were advising u based on boyfriend and girlfriend relationship. where they ask the third party to stay clear...This case is different..

Jackpal:
This is a fact based on what is happening in my family presently.


Around last week Fridays afternoon i saw my mom hiding her phone from me at first, i didn't even bother but when I discovered she was sending messages to a unknown number i started putting notice to it. This happened till late in the night like around 2 am, i was awake and I went to the sitting room only to see her washing clothes in the laundry and simultaneously chatting with someone and this is very unusual of her but my father didn't notice notice anyways.

On Saturday Last week the following morning i heard her making calls that she will be there by afternoon i felt like confronting her but i felt that she might just be going to her place of work. Afternoon came and she said she was going to another town for a naming ceremony we didn't mind. I left the house and i came back around 9pm and discovered that she wasn't back yet so i called her and she told me she won't be coming back that night then i knew she was up to something. I listened to the background very much and I noticed it isn't a party stuff or anything.

On Sunday she came back and I was mad but i just kept mute as i thought that I was not in a position to confront her.

Fast forward to today's early morning around 4 am. I heard my dad's angry voice he was very angry with my mum at first I thought she broke something in the room but i later heard my mum pleading that he didn't have sex with the man. After much contemplating, i went out of my room to the sitting room where they were and i saw my mom holding her phone i sensed that, her act has been exposed. My father left us there and went to his room. I confronted my mom and told her that i knew she didn't go for a naming ceremony the previous week and she was kind of surprised and she asked me how i got to know but I didn't reply her.
My dad came out of his room and asked her to come inside. Like after about two hours, my mom came to call me and I went to their room and dad sat me down and told me that he saw a text message on my mom phone the sender said they were to meet the day before but she my mom didn't meet him. My mom said the man is just a boss at his office and nothing more. So dad told me that I am his witness that if such happens again that he is going to divorce my mom. Well, my mom insisted that she didn't have sex with the man

I have 3 siblings and but they are still small am the first born am about clocking 20 years of age.

What should I do please?

Leave the two of them to sort out their issues . It is none of ur business

About you sending a message to your dad that it might happen again, it's better you don't try it. Try and be as neutral as possible. Let them handle their issues themselves but since they have called you in rather be the peace mediator, cos if their fall should have your hand in it you won't find it funny.
Since you have a good rapport with your mum, call her and talk to her. She is an adult and knows the implication of what she is doing, but further repeat it to her o. You can beg your Dad on her behalf too. At the end of the day they will work out their issues themselves, don't put your head in more than necessary.

If your family is going through financial difficulties be rest assured your mother's denial is nonsense. Women are the first to panic when there's money problem and they can hop into any bed to maintain status quo.

What I suggest you do is to talk to your mother and see if she has money problems. Believe me money is ninety percent reason a married woman will cheat on her husband.

Jackpal, please don't send any text message to your Dad oooo, why would you even do that? Do you want them to split? I don't think you should be involved but since you have already been involved you need to call your Mum and sit her down, talk to her about the implications of her cheating on your Dad, tell her you the children will be at the receiving end and you wouldn't want you and your other siblings to suffer for her wrongdoings. Remind her that the man is also somebody's husband and would she be happy if your sister(if you have one) grows up and come to complain to her that someone is sharing her husband with her? And will she be bold enough to give an advice? Just advice her to move closer to her husband, discuss her fears with him. The man is her boss he might be threatening her and all sort and also tell your Dad to also move closer to her. Talk to her and be her best friend. Good luck