ammyluv2002:
Trust is everything in a relationship. You should be able to trust your partner at least 80%.


It takes a lot of love and reasoning to forgive someone that have cheated on you especially when you've been faithful to that person. You need to forgive her totally if you want to keep her as your babe. You also have to understand two wrongs can't make anything right.

I think, you need to forgive yourself for paying her back then find a place in your heart to forgive her. Everything is mindset, set your mind back to the days before the cheating happened. Try as much as possible not to doubt her, remove every negative thoughts. Assume, you've given her a second chance to start all over.

Btw, cheating on one's partner is awful! You just have to forgive her/him or move on

thanks

I can't tell her though. It'll ruin everything. I'm 100% sure she won't find out. But I think i'll just try to get over what she did.

Maybe i can cancel it out in my head like algebra. lol.

pat1612:
Bros that mean you know that she will cheat on you again

No one can stop you from cheating unless you yourself want to be loyal.so relax stop worrying and trust issues will not stop her from cheating on you 8

DeLioncourt:
[b]Hey guys.
I have a girl I've been dating for over a year. I believe I love her deeply although I don't know how its supposed to feel but I can do anything in my capacity for her. We've had some rough patches...things that would break up normal relationships (not cheating oo...cheating is small sef)...but we are still together. She cheated and some point and I found out. She begged me to forgive her and all... I did cos I really do love her.
However, I have two problems.
1. I have the grandfather of all trust issues.
2. I'm cheating on her.

After her cheating incident, the two problems were triggered. At first, I cheated cos i felt that was the only way to get over it...
I still love her...more than any girl i've been with but I still don't have the heart to trust her.
The sad part is, she seems to trust me completely. I once told her I had a girl come over to the house and she laughed it off. Said I should try a more believable prank.

How can I deal with the trust issue?? I feel it is ruining my relationship.[/b]

Oahray:
deal with your cheating issues first. If you are not trustworthy yourself, you'd never see any reason to trust anyone else. You have no right to sit in judgement of her when you aren't any better as the turn of events have proved.

You didn't cheat on her because she cheated on you. You cheated because you wanted to cheat. You are behaving like a lady, blaming your partner for your own deliberate decision to cheat, pretending it was some form of revenge.

If you can't get past her cheating, just let her go. Don't act like you are doing her a life-saving favour by sticking around.

DeLioncourt:


not blaming her and i'm not doing her a favor. i guess you replied with some level of annoyance. i titled my thread "i'm ruining my relationship" because i know it is on me.
And yes, I decided to cheat because I felt it would make me feel better. Same way people resort to drugs and alcohol.

Oahray:
yeah, I was irritated. I don't like seeing people act self-righteous over something they are also guilty of.

Alright, think of hers the same way too. She decided to cheat because it would make her feel better (she was in the mood and needed to satisfy the craving). It's like taking a drug to stop one's headache.

Why is it you can justify your action but can't justify hers? Is it because she hasn't found out the way you found out?

I think you should let her go. Your relationship would never go back to normal, because you are holding on too tightly to your victim status and you are wrapped up in your own emotions like an onion.

lol. like an onion

anyway...if i do decide to let her go, do you think I should let her know all these things? or will it be better to just end things like I wasn't feeling it anymore?
what will be the most suitable way considering how she will feel after?

shegxi:
well, since u agree u are ruining d r/ship, dats the first step to go. i honestly think u guys shld take a break, deal with ur issues individually and see where it goes from there.
dere is no point forcing it if it ain't working.

DeLioncourt:


lol. like an onion

anyway...if i do decide to let her go, do you think I should let her know all these things? or will it be better to just end things like I wasn't feeling it anymore?
what will be the most suitable way considering how she will feel after?

DeLioncourt:


i thought about that... taking a break. but does that really help?

is the break intended for self-discovery or exploring other opportunities? besides, I feel saying you want a break is just an abbreviation for breakup.

DeLioncourt:


you're partly right. I have the constant feeling that she will. But she has done so much to win my trust back...from video calls whenever I get paranoid to casually letting me talk with her friends and all.
except she's a vile spirit, i believe she really regretted it and was really sorry.
but i don't know how to get past it.