A serious and intelligent girl will know when a guy is being Nice to you just because he needs sex from you. Sex shouldn't be offered because of acts kindness

You no wan fok but you dey collect him money and other things from him. Tell me what are you giving the guy back in return. You wicked pass devil walahi. You better do it and know the size of him preek so as to know whether na your size and the kind of motor wey you go dey like to drive. Come to think of it are you a virgin?definitely you are not.

epp the bros na, how long do you want him to be vice captain of the vaseline crew? how long! and vaseline don add money.

baddestchic:
guys sha

Jesus will come down from heaven and marry u na.

Op, pls don't listen 2 dose ppl dat asked u 2 give him. I once did dat & till 2moro I regret it. D truth is, if u have some ounce of the fear of God in u, u won't do it. Remember, heaven is a personal race. Any relatnship dat will take u far 4rm God, pls avoid it.
D bitter truth is, we all know dis things, may God have mercy on us.

I was forced to make a coment for just these reasns: she said pls don't insult me jst advice.. guys started insultin

She needed advice not personal grudge because wit d way some guys r comentin it seems they re reflectin 2 their past problms in relationship

Babe take this soft advice: wat he did is sometin any gud guy can do bt his atitude towards sex shows he was been carin n generos jst because of ur unclothedness,n I bet u once u give him sex he will act more weird. Think

D truth is, no good persn will give n expect a return xcept 4 a purpose... their r people wu can spend 100k jst 4 sex bt can't help his felow wit 10k. Think

CrazyQuinn:
I really don't understand why girls will allow a guy to take care of your needs financially and emotionally

.

U are been taken care of Financially doesn't mean ur collecting direct money! If one put ya up to a job, contract or something that will fetch you money, of course it will upgrade you and + ur pockect! #You Dig? About Emotions. There's something they called Emotional intelligence! Go know about it pretty!

Oliviaarims:
If truly you've resolutely decided to abstain, the need to create this thread wouldn't have arisen. Your resolve isn't strong enough, you're having second thoughts and that's where you've begun to lose the battle.

Abstinence is good. Don't allow anyone tell you that because you're no longer a virgin, you must continue indulging in premarital sex.

@ Op, truth is bitter. Don't ignore the few right advice. My advice is that u forget the majority and do what this qote says. If a man truly wants to marry u, he'll wait till he does so before he demands sex, otherwise, he only wants to use and dump you. Be wise, what u term 'kindness' could just be his ploy and scheme to land u in bed and thereafter dump u sad and broken hearted. Take no gift from him again. You are wrong when u receive a gift from a man u don't want to have sex with, a man who's not ur hubby. Flee henceforth from every gift from a man. Above all, never offer to visit him in any secret venue especially his house for any reason. Use your head, stay safe. God bless u my sister.

Peace!

"i am a loner now " "some nairalanders go be like...let me take over

MrTruth4real:
Jesus will come down from heaven and marry u na.

you guys should keep your marriage then.... marriage isnt an achievement

U may not b a virgin bt how many would u give sex b4 that day when u will say I do?

My point is givin him sex may not stop u frm Getin ur dream man bt once u say no sex till after marrage,he's supose 2 kip his nicenes until he's proven his comitmnt that his aim is not 4 sex bt 2 check n balance and once it's proven, sex might still occur in d later hour

Glory12345:
Actually this is my first post on nairaland,I'm a comment reader and a post reader and I have observed how people do things here and I feel I should share my story,please don't criticise me or anything, I just need your help or advise,and please do read carefully to understand,and i am also sorry if i dont type this well,i'm not much of a writer.Thanks in advance

There's this guy I met at 3chub Ikeja,I actually went to ask if there was any standard rechargeable fan because i have been scammed alot by all these "fairly used" rechargeable fan,so i decided to buy a new one because they sell home appliances there,even though people say fairly used items are better which I chose to decline because this is 2016,and this buhari regime doesnt accomodate an extravagant spending.

I work in Lagos but I stay in mowe,and the electricity there isn't too good so that's why I'm getting the fan so even when the gen is off,i would have an alternative,so when I got to the store,the sales ambassadors offered me different brand rechargeable fan,but i later got a syinix rechargeable fan,because I was impressed with the number of months the warranty covers so I purchased it with my ATM card since I just came to inquire and not buy and I was cashless,I had to just use the POS *I'm only explaining all if these to give you a clearer understanding of the issue on floor*

After purchasing the fan,there was this guy that came to buy a gas cooker and we happened to meet and we both exchanged contacts with eachother and few months later we developed feelings and we had a relationship and we were doing the normal relationship vibe,until this week,he started acting up because I said no sex until marriage...he's a very nice person anyway,he helped me in so many ways(advices,financially,physically) but just because I said no sex until marriage,he's acting up already,although I have my reasons for abstaining until marriage anyway but my story is sad,and I don't know who to tell and I feel more comfortable telling people online because someone that knows me physically might not say the truth to me,because they don't want to hurt me,please I need matured comments even if it will hurt,just tell me

Although we aren't kids,but I'm just troubled because I love him a lot and I don't know what to do.

I'm a loner right now

I believe all that is important to you should be God not mere mortal with infatuation. If you give him sex in exchange for being caring or nice that's prostitution. If u feel that's a yardstick then what will you give to God that gives u life? May God grant you understanding. You quite know he loves you for sex... so after giving him sex what again will keep him? No sex before marriage and stick to that or find your way to bible believing chucrch. Sad for that matter you're working. No man can meet your needs but God alone.

Glory12345:
Actually this is my first post on nairaland,I'm a comment reader and a post reader and I have observed how people do things here and I feel I should share my story,please don't criticise me or anything, I just need your help or advise,and please do read carefully to understand,and i am also sorry if i dont type this well,i'm not much of a writer.Thanks in advance

There's this guy I met at 3chub Ikeja,I actually went to ask if there was any standard rechargeable fan because i have been scammed alot by all these "fairly used" rechargeable fan,so i decided to buy a new one because they sell home appliances there,even though people say fairly used items are better which I chose to decline because this is 2016,and this buhari regime doesnt accomodate an extravagant spending.

I work in Lagos but I stay in mowe,and the electricity there isn't too good so that's why I'm getting the fan so even when the gen is off,i would have an alternative,so when I got to the store,the sales ambassadors offered me different brand rechargeable fan,but i later got a syinix rechargeable fan,because I was impressed with the number of months the warranty covers so I purchased it with my ATM card since I just came to inquire and not buy and I was cashless,I had to just use the POS *I'm only explaining all if these to give you a clearer understanding of the issue on floor*

After purchasing the fan,there was this guy that came to buy a gas cooker and we happened to meet and we both exchanged contacts with eachother and few months later we developed feelings and we had a relationship and we were doing the normal relationship vibe,until this week,he started acting up because I said no sex until marriage...he's a very nice person anyway,he helped me in so many ways(advices,financially,physically) but just because I said no sex until marriage,he's acting up already,although I have my reasons for abstaining until marriage anyway but my story is sad,and I don't know who to tell and I feel more comfortable telling people online because someone that knows me physically might not say the truth to me,because they don't want to hurt me,please I need matured comments even if it will hurt,just tell me

Although we aren't kids,but I'm just troubled because I love him a lot and I don't know what to do.

I'm a loner right now

dear OP, sorry I will be taking your time but I hope you can sacrifice that time and learn something.

first of all, I want you to understand that if your description of him as being nice is satisfactory to you and you both have been in this relationship for a time above 3months with this sex issue as the only problem, pls don't be in haste to bid him goodbye as it may take you another three yrs to meet such a person.

though you didn't mention that you are a virgin or not but from your post, I guess you are not and I also guess your partner is not a virgin either. that being said, the decision to stop sexual relationship until after marriage is yours alone, probably based upon past experience and this experience and your decision had together been the forces and strength that had been helping you to maintain that promise to yourself. but on the other hand, your partner probably had no such experience(even if he had, I guess he had not mould it into such decision) and therefore had nothing to help him keep such decision and just like every effort without encouragement, he is losing interest in that decision of yours because unlike you, he has no inner force to keep the decision. understanding this and putting yourself in your partner's shoes will help you understand why he is acting strange and your inability to tolerate and manage him is nothing but something i will call selfishness.

if you agree with me on the things above, then let's look at what I think you should do.
sometimes guys(especially those who can at least invite any girl for a weekend and take reasonable care of her for the period) demand for sex not because the can't afford another girl but because they feel that they will be tagged a fool if the girl eventually leave and a guy get scared of loosing only a girl he feels has
value( not just sexual value) therefore you need to give him that assurance that he won't be considered as a fool even if he lost you. this you must do by investing in the relationship.
since you are working are earning something, you can start by buying somethings that he doesn't have him, in his name. you may even be spending part of what he gave u in buying any of the things e.g, cooking utensils, shirts, iron etc.
and then you let him know several times that you understands that it is not easy for him but he should just bear with you a little more.
it will get to a point where he will begin to see you as someone who also stands to lost something should the relationship go the other way, then he focuses his attention more on your future even as he tries to understand why his woman has chosen to abstain from something "everyone" consider pleasurable.
at this point, even if he will complain, you will see the fact that he still wants the relationship to continue that is if there is indeed tru love and he is ready and consider you as having the quantity of the woman he wants and above all, want you to be that only woman in his life.
remember, not all the guys who will tell you to leave him will stand with you for a month without seeing your pant but continue to provide for you.
be wise, caring husband materials de scarce more than dollar.
wish you success.

tellwisdom:
Nigerian gurls are very foolish and dull. If he had refused you all these assistance, would you have come here to say "he's very nice"?? You scored him nice because he was able to help you financially and physically. I no blame you, na the eddiot wey leave him mama for village dey take care of a total stranger i go blame...Onye ara jati jati

Nigerians and their c0mments. Very plain with their intenti0ns. No time. Bros shake me abeg lols.

Say No to his (advice,financially,physically) the same way you say no the other one.

CrazyQuinn:
I really don't understand why girls will allow a guy to take care of your needs financially and emotionally

comments like this make me happy cus it shows there are still good, matured, independent ladies out there

JustHere2Observ:
If you are not ready to have sex with him, then dont. He should respect your decision not to have sex until marriage whether you are a virgin or not, so my advice if you dont want to dont do it.

I don't just know wat to say but babe I envy ur knowledge, u just spoke the plain truth, babe he is just spending for you just to Bleep u notin more, if he really have feelings for you, he won't be angry because u said no. Girls stop collecting money from guys dem no go ever hear word.

baddestchic:




you guys should keep your marriage then.... marriage isnt an achievement

And girls will still be the one looking for husband everywhere going out for alter call and d rest, some of u even go as far as using charms.

Glory12345:
Actually this is my first post on nairaland,I'm a comment reader and a post reader and I have observed how people do things here and I feel I should share my story,please don't criticise me or anything, I just need your help or advise,and please do read carefully to understand,and i am also sorry if i dont type this well,i'm not much of a writer.Thanks in advance

There's this guy I met at 3chub Ikeja,I actually went to ask if there was any standard rechargeable fan because i have been scammed alot by all these "fairly used" rechargeable fan,so i decided to buy a new one because they sell home appliances there,even though people say fairly used items are better which I chose to decline because this is 2016,and this buhari regime doesnt accomodate an extravagant spending.

I work in Lagos but I stay in mowe,and the electricity there isn't too good so that's why I'm getting the fan so even when the gen is off,i would have an alternative,so when I got to the store,the sales ambassadors offered me different brand rechargeable fan,but i later got a syinix rechargeable fan,because I was impressed with the number of months the warranty covers so I purchased it with my ATM card since I just came to inquire and not buy and I was cashless,I had to just use the POS *I'm only explaining all if these to give you a clearer understanding of the issue on floor*

After purchasing the fan,there was this guy that came to buy a gas cooker and we happened to meet and we both exchanged contacts with eachother and few months later we developed feelings and we had a relationship and we were doing the normal relationship vibe,until this week,he started acting up because I said no sex until marriage...he's a very nice person anyway,he helped me in so many ways(advices,financially,physically) but just because I said no sex until marriage,he's acting up already,although I have my reasons for abstaining until marriage anyway but my story is sad,and I don't know who to tell and I feel more comfortable telling people online because someone that knows me physically might not say the truth to me,because they don't want to hurt me,please I need matured comments even if it will hurt,just tell me

Although we aren't kids,but I'm just troubled because I love him a lot and I don't know what to do.

I'm a loner right now

if you ain't comfortable with having sex before marriage, then don't do it.
if he means business, it shouldn't be a problem. don't mind those telling you to have sex with him cos he has helped you o.
better person will come.

for me o i will advice u to follow ur wish but dont counplen if he disiad to eat out

What you guys need is simple.
.
.
.
Understanding!!
.
.
If You Really Want To Abstain Till Marriage.
You Just Need To Talk It Out With Him In A Lovely Manner.
Open Your Mind To Him.
There Are Various Ways To Satisfy A Guy Sexually Aside Spreading Legs.
.
Reach Out To Him.

MrTruth4real:

And girls will still be the one looking for husband everywhere going out for alter call and d rest, some of u even go as far as using charms.

everyones stand point is different.... it's sha not a do or die something.... if one guy sees you as substandard another will see you as a queen so why the hurry everyones time is different....as for me im not in a hurry.... *big smile*

may konji kill any girl Dats not a virgin and is insisting on no sex till after marriage.

@op why didn't you tell nairalanders and your supermarket boyfriend your personal reasons from abstaining from sex before marriage may be we can be in your shoes.

On the contrary s?x is mutual interest oo, both sides enjoy the matter.

Good luck

Oliviaarims:
If truly you've resolutely decided to abstain, the need to create this thread wouldn't have arisen. Your resolve isn't strong enough, you're having second thoughts and that's where you've begun to lose the battle.

Abstinence is good. Don't allow anyone tell you that because you're no longer a virgin, you must continue indulging in premarital sex.

Olivia the truth here is that the Op called for that silly demand of her boyfriend! Why was she busy relying on him for her needs when she's not down with the probable consequence? Most girls just want to eat their cake and have it! Would she not be acting up if the guy had refused her emotional and financial needs?

My dear, First of all, you came to a wrong place to seek advise. Most of the guys here are not smiling, they will end up giving you a wrong advise. My take is it, what you won't eat don't smell it. Please flee from fornication, if the guy really love you ,he will agreed with you. What if you had sex with him and decided to break your heart. Never allow anyone to force you against your wish. Best of luck.

You perhaps think he's gonna leave you after sex, well, some funny guys do so.
but if you know your guy and he is mature, it’s not a big deal. although the bible is against it.

It all depends on your reasons for abstaining from sex,, if he Loves you too he'd understand, and wait till you're ready... Maybe you should talk to Him..

frubben:


I don't just know wat to say but babe I envy ur knowledge, u just spoke the plain truth, babe he is just spending for you just to Bleep u notin more, if he really have feelings for you, he won't be angry because u said no. Girls stop collecting money from guys dem no go ever hear word.

Help me loudeet for those at the back