Europija:
Nairalanders...I am girl 26 years old.i am only for 5 months with this Nigerian guy..I was the one to aproach him first.He is very good looking.When i met him.he was fresh from brake up.His Nigerian ex girl left him without saying nothing.They were togethet for 9 years in relationship.He was teling me then how much he loved her bt she broke his heart..This guy was good to me..many times he asked help.from.me.coz he has no job..no money..he barrows money from me.n gives me.back..His ex contacted him 1 months back..saying excuses why she just disapeared that time..Now i have her number on whatsapp and her and my.boyfriend are in same time online..It makes me really doubt that they are in contact again or back again... I am.convinced he stil loves her...His ex was never good to him bt he always stayed with her.. What should i do now?Should i contact that his ex or what should.i do?pls nairalanders help.me.i love this guy so much

Europija:
Nairalanders...I am girl 26 years old.

LadyMercedes:
Had to check your profile to make sure you're not my ex's girlfriend. The situation sounds so similar... We broke up (9 years ago though), but we're VERY close now, closer than we ever were.

I don't see anything wrong in him being friends with his ex. Don't expect him to stop talking to her because of you. It would only create issues for you, and the guy.

And, don't expect him to tell you he doesn't feel anything for her. Please! Except it was a nasty break up, those feelings would always be there.

LadyMercedes:
Had to check your profile to make sure you're not my ex's girlfriend. The situation sounds so similar... We broke up (9 years ago though), but we're VERY close now, closer than we ever were.

I don't see anything wrong in him being friends with his ex. Don't expect him to stop talking to her because of you. It would only create issues for you, and the guy.

And, don't expect him to tell you he doesn't feel anything for her. Please! Except it was a nasty break up, those feelings would always be there.

saintfellow:
ex girlfriend?
as in lesbobo?

Souljaboi1:



Very true, even at that you don't just kill emotions except they never truly existed.

LadyMercedes:


Ex's... it's right there!

saintfellow:
ok i get it. i don fear b4 o.

Lmao! I've rewritten it.

LadyMercedes:


Lmao! I've rewritten it.

onyekachee:
so sorry dear but the bitter truth is that your man is still very much bonded with that lady,there is nothing you can do about it,don't leave the relationship yet,but while at it,try and be open to other options,don't push other guys away

okusebi:

perfect advice

KunleSteel:


They didn't really break up, she just went AWOL.
And now that she's back, the "love" and the "9 years" factor would draw him to her.

You love him, yes.... But he has a choice to make.

njiasi30:
Hmmmm, op ve entered one chance 2 b honest with u nothing can separate dem, even if dey don't get married to.... D bond will still b dere and dey will forever remain friends. U re hurting urself by checking on dem. U came into his life when he needed a shoulder to lean on and someone 2 assist him 2.

It's either u accept him...and continue to feel insecure or u let go of what u can't change and move on. Such is life dear, so Cheer up

wunmi590:
Op, you dont need to really disturb yourself, to the extent ofbgetting sick or calling her, what i have come to believe in relashionship is that, ones somebody is for you, believe me you, the person will forever be yours.

But at the same time, you dont expect your guy to just forget his ex of 9years like that, their would still be some connection, though it might not really be what you ate thinking, but their would surely be some connection.

Just call your man, sit him down and talk to him, am sure he would listen to you if actually you are for him.

LadyMercedes:
Had to check your profile to make sure you're not the girlfriend of my ex. The situation sounds so similar... We broke up (9 years ago though), but we're VERY close now, closer than we ever were.

I don't see anything wrong in him being friends with his ex. Don't expect him to stop talking to her because of you. It would only create issues for you, and the guy.

And, don't expect him to tell you he doesn't feel anything for her. Please! Except it was a nasty break up, those feelings would always be there.

Oliviaarims:


Don't even think of contacting his ex. That's crazy. And you give yourself unnecessary headache by keeping her contact and watching for when both of them are online. In fact, it's funny.

In my opinion, though, this guy may not really love you. At least not yet. He's probably being nice to you and trying to push things because you're a nice person. A girl he's been with for 9years? That's a whole lot. People don't just get over relationships like that. And moreso, they didn't break up properly. He must have been waiting for her to come back.

Maybe you should stick around a while and asses how he feels about you. Make sure he's not just collecting your money. In this case, he needs to stop talking to his ex, too. It's not healthy. Make your decision from what you observe.

KunleSteel:


They didn't really break up, she just went AWOL.
And now that she's back, the "love" and the "9 years" factor would draw him to her.

You love him, yes.... But he has a choice to make.

Europija:
ok bt wil.they go back together?he was teling me how he doesnt want her back coz she played him many times...