Toks2008:
THE SUBMISSIVE WOMAN

Most ladies spend so much time and energy preparing for a wedding ceremony but very unprepared for just one condition responsible for a formidable union called SUBMISSION.

The modern day woman has allowed sophistication as a result of sound education and several other factors to make her see herself as equal to a man hence finds it difficult to be extremely submissive and this is one of the triggering factors for a break up. Being fully submissive to your man is one of the greatest secret to longevity of any romantic affair so Lets see what the Quran and Bible has to say concerning the act of submission from the woman.

Al-Tirmidhi 3272 - "When Allah's Messenger was asked which woman was best he replied, 'The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding her person or property by doing anything of which he disapproves'."

Ephesians 5:22-24 :Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

No woman has any business with marriage or any serious romantic affair with a man until she is ready to "submit,honor,respect,reverence her husband to the maximum level just as she will respect the lord.Show me a submissive woman and I will show you a peaceful and lasting union.Being submissive does not mean you should obey your man blindly or go against the commandments of GOD neither does it make you a zombie or a mindless person but it means being meek,humble and serene even when you disagree with your man as many times as possible.Believe it or not,no matter how many relationships you get involved in,you will always have issues if you don't learn how to submit yourself to your man.

And as the man,for whatever reason you choose to marry that lady, if you are not ready to love that woman with her imperfections and without exception with behavior worthy of respect and esteem, always seeking the best for her with an attitude of loving-kindness all the days of your life please don't propose marriage to her.

GOD commands the man to love the wife and the wife to submit to the husband. Refusal to do this is rebellion against GOD himself.By loving your wife you are honoring GOD and not doing your wife a favor and by submitting to your husband, you are demonstrating an act of obedience to GOD and not to your husband.

I hope this makes sense.

Toks2008:


The biggest problem I have always and will always have with most posters on my threads is that they never ever read to understand before making comments.

For Petes sake I just explained that a woman can in fact stand her ground as regards any decision but it all depends on the manner she does that...What you have expressed is an opinion with the mindset that I encouraged women to be zombies...nah so please don't twist my write up.

asuo27:
Base on the first scripture you used " men love your wives as you love yourselves". hope i got that?.

And the second one which says "women should be submissive".

My problem here is "Loyalty is a two way thing", how will a woman be docile while her loving and caring husband cheats on her?.

hardbody:
I believe in equal partnership in a relationship. It should be mutually reciprocal. The woman should be given her dues ditto the man. Respect is earned. My uncle told me to strive and earn respect and trust and see my woman eat from my palms. All the macho skills we exhibit doesn't in anyway endear a man to a woman. They are not chattels they are assets which when we'll handled brings you joy, relief, peace of mind and abundance. Without sounding degrading, think about your e-vogue as a woman and imagine the mileage you will gain by listening to its every noise and providing prompt attention and remedy. God bless the lucky woman that deserves me. The world will go green with envy , watching us balling till old age.

I wish I was that woman

I reject people like Toks2008 in Jesus name

Diplomaticbeing:
@OP


Stop sounding like you're an authority or one who has monopoly of wisdom.

Your postulation is flawed to someone like me, because I believe that love or submission when given (earned or not), should be maintained so as to sustain it.

In my altruistic nature, every living human being is automatically qualified for my love, care, respect etc - free of charge - however, to sustain any of these free goodies from me (especially a wife) she must continually improve (maintain) on all virtues.

In summary, I say altruism plus reciprocation equal to a healthy and happy marriage.

Berbierklaus:

[b]Grandpa no one asked you for your life history,so please relax and take to corrections.

if You were my husband/boyfriend,I would have told You to "shutup and listen" I said "Relax" coz You are my grandpa

Now to the argument You both are having,Everyone has an opinion,trust me I have come to understand You and your writeups,(You are only been realistic while most of us are striving to be idealistic).The challenge is finding a balance because all these rules and regulations for marriages and relationships are unique to every relationship,some men don't take NO,no matter how submissive the wife is(been realistic,I'm sure You will agree with me) and some men are in awe or their wives and a very agressive NO will do the trick(I'm been realistic),so the problem I have with most of your rightups is that "they are not a standard for relationships,coz every relationship is unique" but from your tone of words,You type like that's all that should be done because it is in the "BIBLE" forgetting that even Jesus said in "MARK 2:27" The sabbath(law) was made for man not man for the sabbath(law),
meaning most of this bible injunctions can be used uniquely not universally. (I hope You know what happened in that verse and why he made that statement?).


secondly,I want to say I agree with your rightup once again,although it is a little bit flawed "to me". Any idiot can see the emphasis You made on "WIVES SUBMISSION" I think its good but I also think it would have been appropriate if You emphasized as much on the "HUSBAND's LOVE". (I think this is where most relationship experts get it wrong).

Now lets use the scripture You qouted as an example,did You realise that Ephesians 5:33 has two parts(part A and B)
Did You realise that part A was talking to the husband?
Ephesians 5:33
However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself
Did You realise that the bible spoke to the husband first? That tells You that Submission is "EARNED" so its flawed for You to say "THE BIBLE SAID THAT THE WIFE MUST BE SUBMISSIVE TO HER HUSBAND NO MATTER WHAT"







because grandpa,the bible has put an unspoken condition in that verse,(You can't respect/submit to your abusive father,You "FEAR" him,likewise if You say wives should be submissive unconditionally,You are only telling her to "FEAR" him,that is not submission according to the bible)

Part B
Ephesians 5:33
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord

Every man that loves his wife,automatically has earned her respect and submission,it is a known fact,and a man that doesn't love his wife(cheating on her "glaringly" abuse her,doesn't do his roles as a husband etc) will be "FEARED" not respected/submitted to).

So grandpa,all this tunranchi is what the bible is preaching(Idealistic) not what our pastors are interpreting the bible to, not what You have interpreted the bible to,which is sadly the (realistic) point of what we have in the world today because our religious leaders have knowingly or unknowingly led some men astray by repeatedly preaching and emphasizing on "SUBMISSION" while skimming through "LOVE".

The kingdom of God is a hot race,I fear for most people,as I have come to a stage in my salvation where,I read and ask the holy spirit to interpret and explain what this really means to me,instead of listening to one marriage counsel/counsellor and corrupting my heavenly journey .

I hope You will settle down and read my epistle,and may the holy spirit help You to realise the truth.[/b]

Laido:
.

Honestly, Be submisive. It helps. Men loves it a lot. Now, somethin happened last week about this in reality which I won't talk about. The man had 2 wives, could u blv he later sent the 2nd wife away all cuz of this issue. The 1st wife still dey gallant. Onto she's submisive and patient. Let your man just be your man and you should just do everythin to makes things get good. #Goodnight

pepigeorge:


if u submit fully to your husband, he won't cheat on u

Toks2008:


Nice question.

The issue of a man cheating will forever be a pain in the minds of many ladies but I'm so so sorry to tell you this truth that submitting to your husband is unconditional.

In submittion you can table your grievances and the fact that your hubby cheats on you is not a ground for disrespect. If you want to leave the union because of that then it's your choice but that must not make you disrespect him.

Your husband is your lord.

Toks2008:


The biggest problem I have always and will always have with most posters on my threads is that they never ever read to understand before making comments.

For Petes sake I just explained that a woman can in fact stand her ground as regards any decision but it all depends on the manner she does that...What you have expressed is an opinion with the mindset that I encouraged women to be zombies...nah so please don't twist my write up.

SirVintageCock:
Did the Bible you keep quoting your talks also informed you about this.? If you are basing your argument from the Bible please stick to. David had a case with God after bedding Uriah's wife.
It is an African man's mentality not biblical and unchristian to cheat and when you cheat you commit adultery which according to my Bible is a sin and it rubbishes the sanctity of marriage. It should not be condole by anyone. It is a breach of trust and Us men should not allow ourselves be roped into thinking that it is a way of life that is acceptable at all.

Berbierklaus:

Maybe his former life

ammyluv2002:
Yes! It does make sense, but wives should submit fully to their husbands according to the bible principles. My husband cannot tell me to sleep with his friend & you expect me to submit fully

Toks2008:


I was...how else will I be confident to come to the most populous online forum in Africa to start dishing out marital advice.

Some will say why advise us if you can't keep your marriage and I see that as an ignorant and lame question. Anyone who has passed through a road is in the best position to tell you about it.

Furthermore it is important to understand that if you have never been in that institution called marriage, you may never understand when you read stuffs about it....trust me, it's not a walk in the park but it's an institution you must meticulously strife to be in.

When some people blame pastors or people in divorce mess for being careless about their marriage I just shake my head at the ignorance of some people.

I am telling you for a fact that if ladies can learn to be submissive to their husbands, that man will make her his for life.

A submissive lady is an elixir to our soul...
Being submissive is different from being mindless or a zombie but in all you do and say, just be submissive.

ammyluv2002:
Yes! It does make sense, but wives should submit fully to their husbands according to the bible principles. My husband cannot tell me to sleep with his friend & you expect me to submit fully

Toks2008:


Not at all my lady. .a wife has all the right under heaven to express her displeasure but she must do it with full reverence and submission.

The day a lady dim it fit to stand shoulder to shoulder with her hubby is the day she ignites the fire of marital discord.

The word of God says you MUST respect your hubby as YOU DO TO THE LORD.

There is no condition attached and that is just what it is.

Weedcrusher:


I'm not twisting your write-up bro. I understand and respect your opinion especially as some are backed up with scriptures. But what I was saying is that, I, weedcrusher, find it awkward for a woman to be overly submissive to me. I will find it inconvenient if a lady I'm supposedly dating agree to everything I say out of showing respect or being submissive to me.
Respect and adore me, and I promise to reciprocate such......

asuo27:
Well!, i'm not satisfied by your respond.

ElsonMorali:
Most people don't understand that in the scheme of things in this world, there can only be one captain in a ship.

That is why there's only one steering wheel in a car for just one driver. Go figure.

A wise woman will be submissive to her husband.

A wiser woman will marry someone she can always respect and be submissive to and not just for money or looks.

elektra:



1st Wife: Submissive
Husband: Marries second wife.

So much for the blissful marriage toks2008 promised submissive wives.

My own is; treat me right and I will treat you with all the love in my heart...but treat me bad then you will see my dark side ......I'm a human being for crying out loud, I have feelings and emotions .....you don't expect me to submit like a person who doesn't have a soul, mind and emotions. The bible's definition of submission is for women who have no feelings or emotions, it's for women with a slave mentality .....This is sooo unrealistic!!! It's more of fallacy

Weedcrusher:


I'm not twisting your write-up bro. I understand and respect your opinion especially as some are backed up with scriptures. But what I was saying is that, I, weedcrusher, find it awkward for a woman to be overly submissive to me. I will find it inconvenient if a lady I'm supposedly dating agree to everything I say out of showing respect or being submissive to me.
Respect and adore me, and I promise to reciprocate such......

Weedcrusher please marry me

Toks2008:


The bible never instructed wives to swallow bull pooh in the name of marriage but respect, reverence, fear your hubby meaning you can express your anger in a submissive and respectful manner.

My sister this is the ultimate key to marital bliss yet it has become extremely difficult for many ladies and this is why divorce will forever be on the increase.

When a lady says my husband does not love me, it will amaze you that in 90% of the cases it is the lady who ignited that act and just do your findings to confirm.

ammyluv2002:
Yes! It does make sense, but wives should submit fully to their husbands according to the bible principles. My husband cannot tell me to sleep with his friend & you expect me to submit fully

misspicy:

I wish I was that woman

I reject people like Toks2008 in Jesus name

Berbierklaus:

[b]Grandpa You still don't get it?

The Bible "FIRST"admonished husbands to "LOVE their wives,why have You decided to throw that part away and keep hammering on "SUBMIT" which actually came "SECOND" in the bible. haba.

How can You now twist it all and put the wife's submission before the husband's love,when the bible specifically told husbands to LOVE their wives first?



it is humans that always twist God's words, to suit yourselves,by doing this You all have created problems that shouldn't have been there in the first place.

Husband are lords to their wives,lords are leaders,the bible admonished leaders to lead by been servants to their subjects, Jesus led by washing the feet of people.

If You want to use the bible as the yardstick to marriage makesure You do so using every part of it not some part of it that suits you
This is the hard truth and the day of reckoning shall come where You will explain to God How You have led people astray by quoting the bible upside down[/b]