deathcomestoall:
Most of his posts are very flawed and he makes it appear as if he's struggling with his own relationship life, reason why he gives so much advice everytime. As the saying goes, those with so much advice have the most issues.

This particular post is not flawed.

'And wise people seek advice from those with failed ventures' - I saw this one here

D issue of marriage is a very delicate tin.most of our women here v lost it.submission does nt mean u r a slave.a submissive woman will always win at d end of d day.forget d macho tin.men r like babies.submit n reverence dem n u will have dem eating from yr hands.is an inborn tin in all male species even animals want to b in charge.is how we were made.but sadly in dis part of d world women equate money to respect n submission. Most women r submissive when the man has money. Our women should change dis mentality of their man being their ATM machine. This is because when most women here begins to make money unconsciously dey feel dey dnt v need to respect their man.poverty mentality v really destroyed our women..

Berbierklaus:

Weedcrusher please marry me

And that's how the they marry the wrong person and start shouting that all men are the same.

He may write that online but I can authoritatively tell you that no man wants to marry a contentious woman.

Why will I marry a home wrecker when there are peaceful women out there.

Being submissive doesn't mean you don't have an opinion or that you become a mumu.

Submission is the power that has been given to women to conquer and subdue the world. That's why they are built physically the way they are.

Unlike the men who have to display raw physical strength.

U re on point

ammyluv2002:
Yes! It does make sense, but wives should submit fully to their husbands according to the bible principles. My husband cannot tell me to sleep with his friend & you expect me to submit fully

That's very very wrong. Everything is premised on the fact that your husband loves you. If he loves you he can't tell you to sleep with his friend(s). So while his "duty" is to love you, yours is to submit. Kind of an assignment. Lol

all dem olosho wives.Twitter instagram wannabez ish.
fhuck this pozts
stupid ass ish

safarigirl:
does he sound married to you

This is just balderdash postulated by a researcher looking in from outside the institution, he doesn't have the required experience to solidify his hypothesis. This is theory.

I'm sure married people are reading his post and laughing, ask him how old he is and why he isn't married despite how knowledgeable he supposedly is on the topic of marriage.

Imagine applying 17th century ideologies in the 21st century.

Abeg, i can't deal with misogynistic Nigerian men

#TeamForeignGuys

This guy is the king of misogynistic men, known him long time that's why my signature is dedicated to him

ItsQuinn:
Submissive woman = slave woman

Dictionary meaning:
SUBMIT: accept or yield to a superior force or to the authority or will of another person.

SLAVERY: Lack of free will

The submissive wife can make an opinion but can't make a decision, only the superior male or the authority is allowed to make a decision even though it doesn't favour the submissive wife. The submissive wife has no right to do otherwise when the superior has already made a decision whether she likes it or not. This means the submissive wife is stripped off her free will but not her freedom of speech. So tell me, how is being submissive different from being a slave when there's no free will?

I have followed your comments and I just pray that you were rather sarcastic and perhaps just joking because there are really preposterous.

nma24:
Same should apply to men too... Must ladies swallow bullshit all in d name of marriage?

hey you need not swallow bullshit...if I were a lady I will draft my terms and conditions for marriage so the hubby must sign the agreement. All you need do is turn down the marriage offer when your terms are not met

Bollinger:


I honestly believe say dem take woman swear for Toks2008. There is something inherently wrong with his mentality. That and the fact that he does not choose his words wisely. The African definition of submission as regards women is pure slavery and i think he gets a hard on just thinking about things like this. See how quickly he used religion to justify his phucked up way of thinking? Ignorance is the bane of religion. Which man in his right minds would want a robot for a wife in this day and age? He better marry a Nigerian because no woman elsewhere will. That being said, I pity the woman who marries him.

No Nigerian woman will even marry him sef.

halimi26:
what gives u the right to discuss heterosexual_ relationships when u are a homosexual_??or are u saying the method ur mother used on ur father will automatically work on other heterosexual men??

LoL are you for real??so cos I'm gay means I can't talk about heterosexual stuffs. Talking about what gives me the "right"? Girl you must have bumped your head.


It doesn't automatically work. All I said is my dad clearly understands when to also "submit". Relationships, whether a gay or straight one would always involve compromise.

Bollinger:


I'll be honest. I did not bother to read the nonsense you wrote because knowing you and the way you think, it will always be about the same thing. The subjugation of the female gender. It is never different. Just the title alone says it all. I honestly doubt you are married. No sane married man thinks the way you do.

he WAS married, now I see why

Toks, Thanks a lot 4 dis write-up! Toks, Thanks a lot 4 dis write-up! Toks, Thanks a lot 4 dis write-up!

But u shouldn't have used d word "SUBMISSION". because ur write-up postulates dat d wife submits to him in all situations, even if he maltreats her - she's to "submit".
The Hadith u quoted (Al-Tirmidhi 3272) doesn't mean she's to submit in totality! Whenever d relationship gets tough, she's d right to seek a solution either one-on-one (between d 2 of them), call upon some respectable family members to intervene and solve d problem or seek a hand of court.
Although, u didn't make mention of these. U kept accenting on "submission" - a kind of submission dat turns one a "slave" and d other a "master".
I'm sure u so much know d outcome of such a "submission".
Therefore, I call for review Toks, Thanks a lot 4 dis write-up! Toks, Thanks a lot 4 dis write-up! Toks, Thanks a lot 4 dis write-up!

But u shouldn't have used d word "SUBMISSION". because ur write-up postulates dat d wife submits to him in all situations, even if he maltreats her - she's to "submit".
The Hadith u quoted (Al-Tirmidhi 3272) doesn't mean she's to submit in totality! Whenever d relationship gets tough, she's d right to seek a solution either one-on-one (between d 2 of them), call upon some respectable family members to intervene and solve d problem or seek a hand of court.
Although, u didn't make mention of these. U kept accenting on "submission" - a kind of submission dat turns one a "slave" and d other a "master".
I'm sure u so much know d outcome of such a "submission".
Therefore, I call for review

Toks2008:


Nice question.

The issue of a man cheating will forever be a pain in the minds of many ladies but I'm so so sorry to tell you this truth that submitting to your husband is unconditional.

In submittion you can table your grievances and the fact that your hubby cheats on you is not a ground for disrespect. If you want to leave the union because of that then it's your choice but that must not make you disrespect him.

Your husband is your lord.

.

What happens when God endowed the woman with great wisdom and your husband with foolishness? Wouldn't it be foolish to obey a foolish man?

This Toks again!! misogynistic human being
Na wa
Please Mr man, when you get married, apply your principles to your wife. leave others out of this. your life, your headache.

ammyluv2002:
Yes! It does make sense, but wives should submit fully to their husbands according to the bible principles. My husband cannot tell me to sleep with his friend & you expect me to submit fully



Modified

All these mentions that I'm not making sense baffles me. Obviously, most people just want to comment on front page threads without grabbing anything them. Just last week here on NL, there was this story of a married woman who deceived a widower over the years with her husband whom she claimed was her brother. They milked him (widower)dry he even rented an appartment for her untill he found out that she was married with 3 kids and he did the unthinkable by pouring acid on her. Some married men are bullies

You guys will be amazed at the things happening in this world. I have seen & heard such stories even in my area. People who haven't seen anything about life should pls stop quoting me jor

my dear no body will ask his wife to sleep with another person ok

masonkz:
Submit to the husband ko. They should both submit to each other.

Using my parents as example, my mama no dey gree o She can be VERY stubborn once she knows she's right. My dad already knows this nature of hers and would wilfully concede to her point of view in order to reach a compromise. They both understand each other that way.

Heck, sometimes she would scream her displeasure on something wrong she feels my dad did. In that instant the guy go just keep quiet, cos he knows him also shouting would solve nothing.

Same thing applies when he is also angry.


The marriage has lasted for almost 30 years...


I do know that marriages can differ, but my point here is, submission can go both ways. Wetin sef.

Marriage requires a good understanding of your partner. If you ask your dad, he will tell you how respectful you mother is, despite her screaming.

Do you know that screaming doesn't necessarily mean being insulting? Most disrespectful and disobedient people won't even scream.

ammyluv2002:
Yes! It does make sense, but wives should submit fully to their husbands according to the bible principles. My husband cannot tell me to sleep with his friend & you expect me to submit fully



Modified

All these mentions that I'm not making sense baffles me. Obviously, most people just want to comment on front page threads without grabbing anything them. Just last week here on NL, there was this story of a married woman who deceived a widower over the years with her husband whom she claimed was her brother. They milked him (widower)dry he even rented an appartment for her untill he found out that she was married with 3 kids and he did the unthinkable by pouring acid on her. Some married men are bullies

You guys will be amazed at the things happening in this world. I have seen & heard such stories even in my area. People who haven't seen anything about life should pls stop quoting me jor

You got it wrong .When your husband says you should commit evil, that's is against the will of God. You should decline. It is better to obey God than to obey man.
Your submission to husband must be according to will of God.

et me come in here, Toks ur all right in ur bible and answers to questions asked. Firstly if ur parents are nt in peace u won't understand it.
Secondly bin raised in d hand of single parents will equally make u never to understand it.
The fact still remains dat a woman not a lady on quot, if u see urself as a lady then ur nt qualified to understand it.this quote is for married women so it makes it difficult for single ladies to understand.u can't be single and understand things never,I repeat never

NO BE MY RESPONSE O..NAH BIBLE TALK AM.[/quote]

Berbierklaus:

[b]Grandpa no one asked you for your life history,so please relax and take to corrections.

if You were my husband/boyfriend,I would have told You to "shutup and listen" I said "Relax" coz You are my grandpa

Now to the argument You both are having,Everyone has an opinion,trust me I have come to understand You and your writeups,(You are only been realistic while most of us are striving to be idealistic).The challenge is finding a balance because all these rules and regulations for marriages and relationships are unique to every relationship,some men don't take NO,no matter how submissive the wife is(been realistic,I'm sure You will agree with me) and some men are in awe or their wives and a very agressive NO will do the trick(I'm been realistic),so the problem I have with most of your rightups is that "they are not a standard for relationships,coz every relationship is unique" but from your tone of words,You type like that's all that should be done because it is in the "BIBLE" forgetting that even Jesus said in "MARK 2:27" The sabbath(law) was made for man not man for the sabbath(law),
meaning most of this bible injunctions can be used uniquely not universally. (I hope You know what happened in that verse and why he made that statement?).


secondly,I want to say I agree with your rightup once again,although it is a little bit flawed "to me". Any idiot can see the emphasis You made on "WIVES SUBMISSION" I think its good but I also think it would have been appropriate if You emphasized as much on the "HUSBAND's LOVE". (I think this is where most relationship experts get it wrong).

Now lets use the scripture You qouted as an example,did You realise that Ephesians 5:33 has two parts(part A and B)
Did You realise that part A was talking to the husband?
Ephesians 5:33
However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself
Did You realise that the bible spoke to the husband first? That tells You that Submission is "EARNED" so its flawed for You to say "THE BIBLE SAID THAT THE WIFE MUST BE SUBMISSIVE TO HER HUSBAND NO MATTER WHAT"







because grandpa,the bible has put an unspoken condition in that verse,(You can't respect/submit to your abusive father,You "FEAR" him,likewise if You say wives should be submissive unconditionally,You are only telling her to "FEAR" him,that is not submission according to the bible)

Part B
Ephesians 5:33
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord

Every man that loves his wife,automatically has earned her respect and submission,it is a known fact,and a man that doesn't love his wife(cheating on her "glaringly" abuse her,doesn't do his roles as a husband etc) will be "FEARED" not respected/submitted to).

So grandpa,all this tunranchi is what the bible is preaching(Idealistic) not what our pastors are interpreting the bible to, not what You have interpreted the bible to,which is sadly the (realistic) point of what we have in the world today because our religious leaders have knowingly or unknowingly led some men astray by repeatedly preaching and emphasizing on "SUBMISSION" while skimming through "LOVE".

The kingdom of God is a hot race,I fear for most people,as I have come to a stage in my salvation where,I read and ask the holy spirit to interpret and explain what this really means to me,instead of listening to one marriage counsel/counsellor and corrupting my heavenly journey .

I hope You will settle down and read my epistle,and may the holy spirit help You to realise the truth.[/b]

Sorry my dear... I normally don't post anything. But if he doesn't love you, why does he propose and you accept to marry him?

supereagle:

You got it wrong .When your husband says you should commit evil, that's is against the will of God. You should decline. It is better to obey God than to obey man.
Your submission to husband must be according to will of God.

The one that happened in my area, the man asked her to sleep with his boss for a job promotion and when she refused, he threatened to divore her. The woman had to speak up to save her marriage. Some men are evil , they can do anything for money and the poor woman who's submissive will be in trouble.

Biko, just like i said earlier, things are happening and if you haven't seen any, you will think the world is okay.

Toks2008:


Happy born day sis.

thanks shuga

Toks2008:


As long as you want to rationalize or define what a man should do to earn your submission then there will always be a problem.

Yes respect and submission is earned. You said even if your husband screams at you, insults you or disrespects you, you should not even scream back or react badly, do you know women are human and have feelings as well, do you know how terrible it feels when someone you love cheats on you or hurts you Do you know not expressing your displeasure can destroy ones emotional stability
See my parents have been married for over 30 years, very happily married I must add but they argue, my Dad consults my mum before he makes any major decisions and if she disagrees he does not go ahead with it feeling like he is the MAN and the same goes for my mum.They both respect each other and treat each other as partners and my Dad does not lord over my mum, that is how a marriage should be, nobody wants to be treated as lesser than the other cos both parties are humans and should be made to feel like their opinion matters in the relationship so everyone wins, marriage is a partnership and not a lord-servant relationship.

This retard again?

ammyluv2002:
Yes! It does make sense, but wives should submit fully to their husbands according to the bible principles. My husband cannot tell me to sleep with his friend & you expect me to submit fully



Modified

All these mentions that I'm not making sense baffles me. Obviously, most people just want to comment on front page threads without grabbing anything them. Just last week here on NL, there was this story of a married woman who deceived a widower over the years with her husband whom she claimed was her brother. They milked him (widower)dry he even rented an appartment for her untill he found out that she was married with 3 kids and he did the unthinkable by pouring acid on her. Some married men are bullies...the world is not okay at the moment. Marriages are suffering and only God can revive it

You guys will be amazed at the things happening in this world. I have seen & heard such stories even in my area. People who haven't seen anything about life should pls stop quoting me jor

My sister you are a fool

Toks2008:


Nice question.

The issue of a man cheating will forever be a pain in the minds of many ladies but I'm so so sorry to tell you this truth that submitting to your husband is unconditional.

In submittion you can table your grievances and the fact that your hubby cheats on you is not a ground for disrespect. If you want to leave the union because of that then it's your choice but that must not make you disrespect him.

Your husband is your lord.

your husband is your lord? WTF? in dis mordern time.. wat era do u think u are 110bc? abegi.. so i shud worship and adore a man even if he cheats, beats and disrespects me? bullshit. ajoma lu ara wa pa ni. All i see here is male chauvinism

Toks2008:


Nice question.

The issue of a man cheating will forever be a pain in the minds of many ladies but I'm so so sorry to tell you this truth that submitting to your husband is unconditional.

In submittion you can table your grievances and the fact that your hubby cheats on you is not a ground for disrespect. If you want to leave the union because of that then it's your choice but that must not make you disrespect him.

Your husband is your lord.

Is loving your wife also unconditional? Since it's in the Bible. Will you love and honor a wife who cheats on you? Because that's the exact words the Bible uses to command men to treat their wives.

In your own words you will treat such a woman like a hoe. But let me guess, if the table turns, the commandments become non-negotiable.

In your warped mind You think God is a toy to use for your misogyny and wickedness. Twist the Bible how it suits you. Hypocrite!

Berbierklaus:

Weedcrusher please marry me

Marriage doesn't work that way my dear , you don't even know if I'm a serial killer or pervert . But my advice for you is to stand by what you believe in. Be true to yourself and never let societal pressure force you into things that go against your ideological core values

Mr Toks, now i can see why ur marriage did not last...and i am sure d next one wont last too if u continue with this mentality u hav...u think like ancient men

Toks2008:


NO BE MY RESPONSE O..NAH BIBLE TALK AM.

Lol........for a man or a lady to cheat, its either the other party is possessed, or has started doing something wrong or stopped doing something right. People don't just cheat, especially men and its senseless to say cheating is men's nature. So its left for both parties to check what's the problem with their love life and fix it. It could be your body or sex organs sagging, and so on........my girlfriend of 9yrs has so cheated on me but I didn't break up with her, instead I found out the problem was us but me especially. I fixed it and she has ever been submissive to me

papauju:
my dear no body will ask his wife to sleep with another person ok

You are completely wrong. It has happened and still happening. Never generalise. Thanks

Madam all this write up only to prove that respect need to be earn I think you should just do d basic and see how sweet your marriage will be, the simple task is respect then comes submission if u get this right every other this na moimoi

Berbierklaus:

[b]Grandpa no one asked you for your life history,so please relax and take to corrections.

if You were my husband/boyfriend,I would have told You to "shutup and listen" I said "Relax" coz You are my grandpa

Now to the argument You both are having,Everyone has an opinion,trust me I have come to understand You and your writeups,(You are only been realistic while most of us are striving to be idealistic).The challenge is finding a balance because all these rules and regulations for marriages and relationships are unique to every relationship,some men don't take NO,no matter how submissive the wife is(been realistic,I'm sure You will agree with me) and some men are in awe or their wives and a very agressive NO will do the trick(I'm been realistic),so the problem I have with most of your rightups is that "they are not a standard for relationships,coz every relationship is unique" but from your tone of words,You type like that's all that should be done because it is in the "BIBLE" forgetting that even Jesus said in "MARK 2:27" The sabbath(law) was made for man not man for the sabbath(law),
meaning most of this bible injunctions can be used uniquely not universally. (I hope You know what happened in that verse and why he made that statement?).


secondly,I want to say I agree with your rightup once again,although it is a little bit flawed "to me". Any idiot can see the emphasis You made on "WIVES SUBMISSION" I think its good but I also think it would have been appropriate if You emphasized as much on the "HUSBAND's LOVE". (I think this is where most relationship experts get it wrong).

Now lets use the scripture You qouted as an example,did You realise that Ephesians 5:33 has two parts(part A and B)
Did You realise that part A was talking to the husband?
Ephesians 5:33
However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself
Did You realise that the bible spoke to the husband first? That tells You that Submission is "EARNED" so its flawed for You to say "THE BIBLE SAID THAT THE WIFE MUST BE SUBMISSIVE TO HER HUSBAND NO MATTER WHAT"







because grandpa,the bible has put an unspoken condition in that verse,(You can't respect/submit to your abusive father,You "FEAR" him,likewise if You say wives should be submissive unconditionally,You are only telling her to "FEAR" him,that is not submission according to the bible)

Part B
Ephesians 5:33
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord

Every man that loves his wife,automatically has earned her respect and submission,it is a known fact,and a man that doesn't love his wife(cheating on her "glaringly" abuse her,doesn't do his roles as a husband etc) will be "FEARED" not respected/submitted to).

So grandpa,all this tunranchi is what the bible is preaching(Idealistic) not what our pastors are interpreting the bible to, not what You have interpreted the bible to,which is sadly the (realistic) point of what we have in the world today because our religious leaders have knowingly or unknowingly led some men astray by repeatedly preaching and emphasizing on "SUBMISSION" while skimming through "LOVE".

The kingdom of God is a hot race,I fear for most people,as I have come to a stage in my salvation where,I read and ask the holy spirit to interpret and explain what this really means to me,instead of listening to one marriage counsel/counsellor and corrupting my heavenly journey .

I hope You will settle down and read my epistle,and may the holy spirit help You to realise the truth.[/b]