Proverbs 22:6...Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it.


We all know this scripture and know that parenthood is no easy job. But everyone says, "what better environment is there to train up a child than in a pastor's home" right?
Or does growing up under a dad as a pastor guarantee a child's future on the right path?


Let's look at the challenges faced by pastor's kids which makes it not so rosy for kids growing up under clergymen's/religious leaders roof.



(1) Pastor's kids face the challenge of living up to the good boy/girl tag: As a pastor's child, I can relate to this. Eyes are always on you as a pastor's kid, to always never go wrong. No mistake is expected of you. In school, you're supposed to be different from all other kids and not to play much, joke around with friends or fail to submit assignments on time.


(2)Pressure:- Growing up, there was always this "pressure" that goes with you being the son or daughter of the renowned pastor in town. Even when faced with physical opposition like guys or girls who wanna beat 'us' up, people think that we should not fight but just meekly get beaten and mauled so badly. The bible says when hit we should turn the other cheek right?


(3)Pastors kids and the "be like your dad" comment or tag:-Everywhere you go as a pastor's kid, you always get the reminder that there's a standard you ought to live up to. And that standard in the eyes of people is always your dad or mom who are ministers. Every little thing you do, is a chance for them to say, "you're just like your dad" or if you make a little mistake, "you should be like your dad or mom". They always expect perfection.

In this age, we have come to know that everyone has a path and a destiny from everyone else including parents. Its really frustrating for a pastor's kid to always hear himself/herself being measured with his/her "pastor's" dad.
This is the reason why many of them rebel and go on to "live the life" they feel will make them different from their dads. In most cases, the kids end up destroying themselves.


(4) Pastor's kids and academics:- Always and again, there is always the notion that a pastor's kids shouldn't fail. People say stuffs like, "his father is the general overseer of the states biggest church". He heals the sick, raise the dead and makes the lame walk. If such a child is not shown the necessary support by his "pastor's" dad, or any given attention as regards helping him do well academically, then forget it. He won't fly academically. Not even dad's miracles will make it work.

(5) Pastor's kids and career choice:-As the son or daughter of a pastor, its almost like a taboo to find yourself in some professions. Which may be where one's talents lie. For example some pastors won't let their kids study law, citing some mundane remark like "lawyers are mostly liars".
And most pastors kick against their children going into the music industry. Restricting the child is robbing the world of another gem that would impart the world positively.


(6)Pastor's children and overall parenting:- It is no longer a secret that pastor's homes churn out "clinically depressed kids" because of bad parenting or "parenting negligence". This is so because, a lot of pastors dedicate so much time to their pastorial ministry forgetting that a trully functional church, begins from a truly happy and functional home.
These kids grow up to be so far apart in relationship from their pastors parent. And even end up hating them.

These are some of the many heart wrenching challenges faced by pastor's kids. On the whole, its not a bed of roses being a pastor's kid.


Original writer: Makydebbie

That's to say a pastor's child is expected to be perfect.

Its actually the opposite these days, they are always tied down, and any little opportunity they find, they get blown out and do things one didn't even expect from them.

There's nothing sweet as being you not minding what the next person has got to say.

Sometimes its not easy, you just have to please everyone cause people look up to your dad

Nice thread hon.

As a son of a pastor, I concur buh I dnt usually give a damn abt wah people say abt me. Tho my mum always complain sha

Modified
If my popsy see me dey make or receive call to opposite sex, na preaching straight. U ll hear something like "you dis boy, are u sure urr born again"...

my mom is a pastor ,,, but I live my own life the way it Please me


u will always hear pple saying
bro u are tarnishing the image of ur mom


as if I be pastor.

Lol all the points are very valid, makes me hate the kinda society we find ourselves in.

nice thread sweetie

Debbie, I'll be back to read this epistle I promise

Meanwhile, Lalasticlala come and see this big snake that landed on cossy's boobs

Sorry guys, I can't relate to any of these..

But I did something really bad last night and it has been affecting my conscience..
I was jejely drinking my garri, when I saw an ant strolling by on the floor. I quickly placed a cube of sugar along its path and watched as it scurried away to call its friends to come help transport the largese.
Immediately I sighted the ants coming for the sugar ,i quickly removed the sugar to make the first ant look like a liar..
Lalasticlala, Am I wicked?

Nice one

uhey are pretenders

Honestly, I can relate. I got cousins who are pastor's kids or lemme use the African-american movie title, "Preacher's kid"


All points are well put and addresses a lot of the mental, psychological and emotional challenges faced by sons and daughters of the clergymen.

This is a really nice thread. Very educative and expository.


About Career path and destiny, I gotta add.....

If only these "pastor-parents" (borrowed word from the OP) can understand that we have just "one life" to live to the fullest in this whole universe then maybe things can get a whole lot better for pastors' kids.

UNI-VERSE MEANS ONE SONG (uni-One; Verse-Song)... Meaning: We all got one song (one life) to make an impact in this world.

All kids have just "One song" to offer on life's stage. If they are restricted because some of them are pastors' kids, the world wont see the best of the kids and their song will be so terrible to the world audience. That song is the life lived and the achievements/progress that go with it.



The Op has spoken well. Kudos Miss....


Uhmmm... Oga Lalasticlala, I know this isnt about Snakes but this thread is very expository. A lot of preachers' kids out there and pastor-parents... They need to see this...

And uhmm.. Madam Dominique... Help move this ministry to the permanent site please...

.........................
**Modified** wow! It made frontpage eventually...

Thanks so much Oga Lalasticlala and Madam Dominique...... You have done a good one here. Happy new month

Smellingmouth use to be a son of a pastor until he met makydebbie who is now incharge of our branch here.

If am liein ask crazymommy

ojun50:
Smellingm.outh use to be a son of a pastor until he met makyde.bbie who is now incharge of our branch here.

If am liein ask crazymom.my

Lol..

Pastor's child? Never..

Smellingmouth:


Lol..

Pastor's child? Never..

lolz so u they there bt why never?

ojun50:

lolz so u they there bt why never?

My parents are not pastors na..

Besides, if dem turn pastor eventually, na between them and God.

Well the only thing I can say is when you cage a person for long, if and when that person find freedom, they'll run wild.

Quite honestly, you're so right. Most children of pastors are so easily influenced because of their wanting to break away from the "pastor's child stereotype". They hardly say no to bad stuff. Like a boy I knew from sec.school who started out "holy",good and kind but wanted to mix in with the cool crowd. By the time he graduated was a chain smoker and bully...

Smellingmouth:


My parents are not pastors na..

Besides, if dem turn pastor eventually, na between them and God.

bad guy no whala hw yr plenty gf for nairaland

ojun50:

bad guy no whala hw yr plenty gf for nairaland

Smellingmouth:
Sorry guys, I can't relate to any of these..

But I did something really bad last night and it has been affecting my conscience..
I was jejely drinking my garri, when I saw an ant strolling by on the floor. I quickly placed a cube of sugar along its path and watched as it scurried away to call his friends to come help transport the largese.
As I sighted the ants coming for the sugar ,i quickly removed the sugar to make the first ant look like a liar..
Lalasticlala, Am I wicked?

NO, you are not wicked,

Just, Stewpeed....

Smellingmouth:

MidasTouche01:


NO, you are not wicked,

Just, Stewpeed....

Waka..

MidasTouche01:


NO, you are not wicked,

Just, Stewpeed....

Midas,the thunder when go fire u ehn.

Smellingmouth:


Midas,the thunder when go fire u ehn.

God of thunder wey no fit produce 1kwt o electricity abi

MidasTouche01:




God of thunder wey no fit produce 1kwt o electricity abi

Haha..

Smellingmouth:


Haha..

Are u Smellymouth??

Smellingmouth:
Sorry guys, I can't relate to any of these..

But I did something really bad last night and it has been affecting my conscience..
I was jejely drinking my garri, when I saw an ant strolling by on the floor. I quickly placed a cube of sugar along its path and watched as it scurried away to call his friends to come help transport the largese.
As I sighted the ants coming for the sugar ,i quickly removed the sugar to make the first ant look like a liar..
Lalasticlala, Am I wicked?

Loolz, u r heartless

Urahara2:


Loolz, u r heartless

How na?