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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship (10466 Views)
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Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 10:08pm On Dec 19, 2016 |
Horlohlah: Lolz owk ![]() Welcome to The COB. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Horlohlah: 10:11pm On Dec 19, 2016 |
TheCOB:Thanks. 1 Like |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Jayson1: 10:14pm On Dec 19, 2016 |
TheCOB:Let's do this again some other time. Many thanks to you. Sleep well. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 10:18pm On Dec 19, 2016 |
Jayson1: Sure we would ![]() More thanks to you though ![]() 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by LoRdCaT(m): 10:41pm On Dec 19, 2016 |
TheCOB:Enjoying? Pfft! Nigress you are boring the shitt outta me. This shitt is annoying. How can i compliment this boring malarkey? Do you live off compliments? It's glaring you do. ![]() |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 6:57am On Dec 20, 2016 |
Top of a very beautiful morning to everyone! I hope we all had a great night. ![]() ![]() Let's remember: Lasting love is a reality that takes two determined hearts in love to make it happen. Don't give up just yet, Let's talk about it. Yea, what if it doesn't work.... But what if it does? ![]() |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Sexytemi(f): 8:44am On Dec 20, 2016 |
Jayson1: okay |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 8:49am On Dec 20, 2016 |
Sexytemi: Welcome to The COB. Thanks for stopping by.... Please share your thoughts and experiences too. ![]() |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 10:21am On Dec 20, 2016 |
Thanks to those who have sent PMs. As we go through the sessions, please don't forget to keep the thread updated with our progress so others get encouraged to do same. Thanksabunch |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Beamborla(f): 12:35pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Jayson1: Very sweet of you to have mentioned me but I'm afraid I'm not much of an authority when it comes to romance. Nevertheless, I'd tie everything down to communication... Not just communication, but effective and honest communication. In addition, you have no business dating someone you can't or do not trust. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 12:44pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Beamborla: Thanks for dropping by dear. Welcome to The COB! Please share, what would you term effective communication in a relationship? |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Beamborla(f): 12:44pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
TheCOB:Communication is not all about talking about random activities, ma'am. There are people who talk less but still communicate effectively with their partners. Communication in relationships is more about putting everything about the relationship into words and backing it by actions where necessary to eliminate wrong assumptions/conclusions. If they had been having effective communication, she would have understood his type of person instead of assuming. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Jayson1: 12:52pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Beamborla:But my friend with an extreme self-confidience will disagree with you on that @the bolded. He finds trust as a weak emotion. BTW, you're welcome. ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 12:55pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Beamborla: My question was unrelated to the earlier discussion which you quoted. It was in no way to discredit your comment. I only asked to get you into the conversation by sharing your thoughts and so since you had mentioned effective communication, I asked that you expatiate on it. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Beamborla(f): 12:59pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
TheCOB: Communication is not effective when the sender and the receiver do not have a shared meaning. There are lots of things involved in communication from tone of voice to body language to body posture to eye contact down to choice of words. Even the environment and mood have roles to play. All of these can either enhance or distort the decoding of a message by the receiver. You have not communicated effectively if the receiver is unable to decode the message you are sending better than you meant it or just as you meant it. I'm trying to explain this without going into mass communication jargons. Simply put, if the receiver is not on the same page with you the sender, then effective communication is yet to talk place |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Beamborla(f): 1:04pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
TheCOB:I don't know how to reply this. But I just answered your question. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 1:04pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Beamborla: Oshey! ![]() ![]() True. Different couples have different communication styles. It becomes effective only when both parties are fully in tune with each other leaving no room for negative assumptions. Infact an intoned couple should be able to discuss their thoughts (and assumptions) freely which other |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 1:05pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Beamborla: Lol yea... Just saw your response now ![]() |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Beamborla(f): 1:06pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Jayson1:Then how does he live? In constant paranoia? That's unhealthy. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 1:10pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by sexymoma(f): 1:16pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
He hardly pick my calls and he calls back at his own convenient TBH i've stopped deceiving myself, i've concluded in my mind that..... he hardly pick my calls at night, if i should talk he'll tell me im suspecting him or sort how can i have a bf that i can't jos call anytime i feel like... that's why i don't date made men, your opinion doesn't count, and they form busy everytime... you see why im scared, it's difficult for me to bliv he doesn't have a gf, Why? cos i met this guy as a made guy. he has his own apartment as in nor be say he buy ooo, he has two cars already.. pls tell me why i won't think of such.. it's only a Gold digger that wouldn't bother, cos her thought would be make i chop wetin i wan chop comot dia. pls my fellow nlander abeg make una advice me.. ok let me tell you this.. i called him on saturday, that i'll be coming to his place, he didn't pick my calls and he didnt even call back same thing on sunday....do you guys bliv he later later called on monday afternoon that he has been so busy... he said he was gonna call back phew!! till this moment he hasn't... i didn't call him too cos it's been looking as if im bugging him. Bliv me i love him so much i won't deny that buh you know why i wanna trust him alil?... he isn't a sex freak type. just want you guys to tell me what i wanna hear or what i don't wanna hear |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 1:23pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
sexymoma: Even before I read through your story, I'd just like to say a hearty thank you for sharing with us. Welcome to The COB Let's do this together ![]() |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Jayson1: 1:23pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Beamborla:Sometimes I do see him as someone with mental disorder marked by memory failures but there's nothing i can do to help his condition. *I wonder how he's girlfriend feel at this. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Beamborla(f): 1:35pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Jayson1:If she's aware of how he feels, then no use wondering. She's either strong enough or stupid enough. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by Jayson1: 1:45pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Beamborla:So you see, he feels comfortably stupid dating a lady he don't trust. And the airhead mgbeke can do anything for my nigga. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by sexymoma(f): 1:47pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
TheCOB:Im always here ![]() 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 1:49pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
sexymoma: The regular cliché is: 'No one is ever too busy for the one they love, they either love you or they don't.' But you see, that may not always be true. So before we cast your bf to dark shadows of not loving you, Let's try to take it back to the beginning.... 1. How long have you been together? 2. How did you meet or what was the connection that brought you together? 3. You only said all the wrong things he does. If you are still in that relationship, I'm guessing he must have some good qualities. Write down a list of the best 10 |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 1:54pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
Jayson1: Might not be a mental disorder. It could be that he has had a terrible past experience with trust. Could just be him trying to protect the himself from the unknown. And the babe might not be so stupid either. She may just not know what to do to help the situation. Ironically, she may feel that doing all he asks would help him see that she's there for him, and develop a weird sense of trust. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by sexymoma(f): 1:57pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
TheCOB:we jos met not quite long, we met close to my office, 10 best ke... if i have i would have written, if i lie to you im deceiving myself ni... he isn't even romantic, he s so stiff. i don't ask him for cash, so i can't say he spends on me. He s intelligent He s ambitious he hardly gets angry "for now that i've known him' he s quick to apologize. "don't know if he s pretending though" He isnt even caring i must tell you. |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 2:00pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
sexymoma: 1.Give a specific timeline please. How long have you been together? 2.Did he exactly name you as the woman he is dating or you simply assumed you were dating? 3.You didn't answer, what connection brought you together? 4. Please sincerely answer this: what is the true reason why you are still in the relationship? 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by sexymoma(f): 2:08pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
TheCOB:must i be specific bout that time,"not quite long" i think i wrote that.. aint a kid, i can't assume someone is dating me if he isn't dating me... i've passed that stage ma'm... what do you mean by connection... i think by now i should be thinking hard on the advice you've given me... i've written enough details na ![]() |
Re: Talk Here If You Are Married or In A Romantic Relationship by TheCOB(f): 2:14pm On Dec 20, 2016 |
sexymoma: I'm sorry but "not quite long" doesn't exactly help us with a true picture of the situation. This is because the age of the relationship is also a very important factor to be considered. But if you prefer it that way, it is well. |
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