Most people now take more importance In the ceremony more than the home, they spent months and days preparing for that marvelous wedding but they don’t care if it’s going to be a marvelous marriage or not.
I was talking to a woman that wanted out of her 6months marriage, when she told me, all I was thinking at that time was the preparation for the wedding ceremony which took months and money but she never for once thought about the preparation for the marriage she is going into.
She didn’t spend just one day to prepare for her marriage not to talk of months just like she and the rest families had done for the ceremony. Won’t it be better for them to spend months in preparing for the marriage than the ceremony? So they could have a better understanding about the marriage they are going into.
On the wedding day they are so excited, two weeks later they start asking question, have I done the right thing? Have I made a mistake?
Only if people can just think about it, a fabulous wedding but a disastrous marriage, it’s not about how great the ceremony is but about how great the marriage is going to be.
I was at a wedding of someone I know, before the D-day, they had talk about the wedding, the money, the venue, the food, the guest and so on but nobody is talking about the preparation for marriage and the lady getting married isn’t much of a good cook, she cannot really do house chores
The lady knows, her parents know, the family knows but I am not sure if the husband also knows but thinks he will cope. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying they will divorce but what I am saying is that the foundation is shaky already and a shaky foundation means a collapsed house. Instead of her or them spending months preparing for the wedding why can’t they spend some time in working on the foundation too, we are talking about the foundation that will carry their marriage for years.
Maybe you are reading and you feel this is not talking to me; it is talking to you because yours might be different. Are you a good home manager? Can you control your anger and emotions? Are you submissive? Are you not stubborn, arrogant and talk down on your partner? These and many more are the things you should check for in your life, so you can start your marriage preparation on it.
Marriage doesn’t depend on how much you spent in the ceremony, it doesn’t depend on who grace the occasion and it definitely doesn’t depend on how fabulous the ceremony is but it depends on how much you spend preparing yourself for the marriage.
Why do you need preparation?
Preparation makes you to be aware of the likely thing you will face which makes you work on how to handle them. It won’t meet you unaware, like someone travelling to the USA in the winter; the person should know he/she needs pullover, you don’t just go empty handed but go prepared with series of pullovers to protect yourself from the weather
According to the Wikipedia, preparation is a management principle whereby people get ready for a final product for a successful experience. Preparation means “a substance especially prepared.” Preparation is a proceeding or readiness for a future event as a goal and an acceptable accomplished final outcome. It is to make something acceptable before you give it to others
Ask yourself. Am I acceptable? And please don’t say that’s who I am, he/she will take me as I am, if he/she loves me, he will accept me like that. No he/she won’t accept you because you are not acceptable, why will he/she accept you when you are not acceptable; can you even accept yourself?
Marriage is not all bed of roses, so you need to be prepared for you to know how to handle situations as they arises and there are some situations that will be very simple but just because you don’t know how to handle it, it turned to a big issue.
I am not saying it’s not good to have a good wedding and preparation but what I am saying is the marriage is more important than the wedding, so you should prepare yourself for the marriage just as you prepare yourself for the wedding this will help you to have a fabulous wedding and a fabulous marriage to match.
Your marriage is the outcome of what you put into it; don’t expect your marriage to be great if you failed to put great things into it. If you want your marriage to be great, you have to prepare yourself to put great things in it just as you prepare for your wedding ceremony to be a success and great and expect a great outcome.

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www.lifeloveandmarriage.com

I can't...I just can't

As usual, picking on the women. Any example of bad marriage foundation always has a woman as the problem. As if men are saints who prepare for marriage but because women can't cook very well and sweep non stop and work like horses that makes them destroy their homes? You are in the woman's mind to know what she thinks of in her heart? That you can guarantee she did not spend one day to think or plan for marriage? Amebo home breaker, I wish I know that your so called someone you know, I would tell her to avoid you. You that are so concerned, instead of using herbstory as a failed marriage one, what did you do to help her? You are here yapping about her not being much of a good cook, or a chore person. You are just planning her marital failure in your heart out of ego.

delishpot:
As usual, picking on the women. Any example of bad marriage foundation always has a woman as the problem. As if men are saints who prepare for marriage but because women can't cook very well and sweep non stop and work like horses that makes them destroy their homes? You are in the woman's mind to know what she thinks of in her heart? That you can guarantee she did not spend one day to think or plan for marriage?

its your mindset thats playing a prank on you. i wasn't picking on anybody, it could have been a man i used as example but it was the lady i know...

ifedapo2016:


its your mindset thats playing a prank on you. i wasn't picking on anybody, it could have been a man i used as example but it was the lady i know...

Taa, She is not a very good cook, did she invite you to come to her house and eat? Do you think her husband is also perfect and a good handy man and perfect provider? Marriage is not about a perfection but rather about two people standing strong and seeing the beauty in each other. No home has perfect couple. Happy couple just appreciate the very nice points which they fell in love with when they met their spouses. Ask anyone who is happily married and they will tell you the truth. Marriages break early because the people involved do not stand to overcome the short coming of their partners. First few years of marriage needs adjustment, no one is perfect you would surely find something that pisses you off about your husband/wife. As long as they do not put you or the kids at risk, as long as they care and appreciate you, you can put the flaws behind you and enjoy life with the one that cherishes you the one you married.

delishpot:


Taa, She is not a very good cook, did she invite you to come to her house and eat? Do you think her husband is also perfect and a good handy man and perfect provider? Marriage is not about a perfection but rather about two people standing strong and seeing the beauty in each other. No home has perfect couple. Happy couple just appreciate the very nice points which they fell in love with when they met their spouses. Ask anyone who is happily married and they will tell you the truth. Marriages break early because the people involved do not stand to overcome the short coming of their partners. First few years of marriage needs adjustment, no one is perfect you would surely find something that pisses you off about your husband/wife as long as they do not put you or the kids at risk, as long asbthey care and appreciate you, you can put the flaws behind you and enjoy life with the one that cherishes you.

hmmmm, i see why we have more broken homes and enduring marriages than a successful marriage.... its ok, i have heard you

ifedapo2016:


hmmmm, i see why we have more broken homes and enduring marriages than a successful marriage.... its ok, i have heard you

Yes, if your spouse cherishes you, would make sacrifices for you and keeps your home and well being first in their plans, is always working to have the family together then look beyond small annoying things like she can't cook like a cheff, she can't scrub toilet 10 times a day, he can't dress like wazup man, he makes mistake when he speaks English, she laughs loud, he can't match his cloth color bla bla bla, marriage is work, go ask any married person you know, ESP those that are happy, forget the trash those so called MOG talk, God would surely judge them deceiving people just to paint their wives and husbands in shinny light instead of telling couples how marriage is all about love, understanding and sacrifices.
If this would cause broken homes in your opinion, then you are not ready to marry if you want Mr/Mrs perfect.
There is no endurance in a successful marriage, their is only acceptance of reality, that small things don't matter, because the person in question does not abuse or destroy their partner in any way. Endurance marriage on the other hand is suffering by people who are living with someone who doesn't care, who is selfish, who picks on any flaw and does not wantbto appreciate their other half. They prolly also abuse them physically or psychologicaly. That is endurance marriage.