Relationships are hard. And perhaps the hardest part is proper farting etiquette. How do you navigate having to fart around the one person you never want to fart around Don't worry, because this cartoon depicts the right and wrong ways of passing gas around your SO.

1. The Right Way
Seriously, there is a right way and a wrong way to farting. In just five simple steps, you too can make sure your lover is blissfully unaware that you ever, ever feel the need to break wind.

2.The Convenient Way
But what if the right way is too much of a hassle? Fortunately, there's the convenient way done in just two steps.

3. The Lazy Way
Of course, sometimes even the convenient way is too much of a hassle. You're already comfortable in bed, for crying out loud! Fortunately, there's also the lazy way to fart in bed.

I don't like it when a guy fart in front of me, especially when it smells.

4. The Asshole way
And if the lazy way is still too much of a hassle, there's always the asshole way. And to clarify, asshole is being used in the sense of the word meaning "jerk," and not anything else.

me i fart anyhow it comes, who has time to be running to the other room, use style release the thing jare; not even when it turns some guys on

Me if I just fart like this, my partner cannot survive it, nobody can survive it. It moves mountains

5.The Catastrophic Way
As if farting in front of your lover wasn't bad enough....there's always the option to fart on your lover.


There's a high penalty to pay for farting not just in front of — but also on top of — the one person you should never, never fart on. And if it's the thing that ruins your relationship, then well, we can't say you didn't earn it!

ToriBlue:
I don't like it when a guy fart in front of me, especially when it smells.

Come on, who likes it?

ladies fart smell so bad I wonder what in their stomach.

The Catastrophic Way — Positive Consequences Of The Cons

Although, every cloud has a silver lining. And if your heart is broken because you broke wind, then you can fart to your heart's content!

Source: http://m.imgur.com/gallery/t6rbc

makydebbie:
Me if I just fart like this, my partner cannot survive it, nobody can survive it. It moves mountains

Jesu! You've got to lay off the beans sister! Global warming is no joking matter

Sentinell:


Jesu! You've got to lay off the beans sister! Global warming is no joking matter

You won't believe I hate beans so much that I can't stand the scent

I have a better idea
Fart in the blanket and make sure your partner doesnt try to bury his / her head in the blanket

I dey mess anyhow

No time to pretend. Just drop it like its hot..

midehi2:

me i fart anyhow it comes, who has time to be running to the other room, use style release the thing jare; not even when it turns some guys on

Correct babe go silent mode
That silent mode is a killer you gotta be skilled and dont be in a rush
You can pretend to be scratching yo ass then spread them butt cheeks wide
Fùck .This thread should be called Fart tales

that moment when u're sleeping in same room with your crush and u ate iya segun beans last night and the gas starts forming, u be like...

BUTCHCASSIDY:

Correct babe go silent mode
That silent mode is a killer you gotta be skilled and dont be in a rush
You can pretend to be scratching yo ass then spread them butt cheeks wide
Fùck .This thread should be called Fart tales

oladipo322:
ladies fart smell so bad I wonder what in their stomach.

Oh no

Lol...this reminds me of my bestie.

Whenever he wants to release that over smelly fart, he would leave their compound to ours then he'll be like.

Padap...Benny! come first. I'm out.

Padap... give me your hand. i would ignorantly stretch my hand out to him.

Padap...close your eyes. I did as he commanded, then he will turn backing me with my hand very close to his ass as he release the bomb. he won't let go of my hand and the thing is seriously smelling.

From that day whenever he calls me out like that, i just tell him he wants to fart and he'll laugh, he later changed tactic to doing it when we are seated together...i liked the guy's style sha, no forming.

Ok keep looking for d guy dat wont fart in front of you

ToriBlue:
I don't like it when a guy fart in front of me, especially when it smells.

Ewww. These girls have turned the thread to a fart fest. Disgusting shi. Takes a walk.

Bonus
The Shifty Way
And if nothing else, you can always blame it on the pet!

Wait, who am i kidding? Nigerians don't allow their pets into the room talk-less of the bed sef

why OP dey analyse mess na?

makydebbie:
Me if I just fart like this, my partner cannot survive it, nobody can survive it. It moves mountains

if no one can survive it, how are you still here?

Tazmode:
if no one can survive it, how are you still here?

Otondo, go and google 'Hyperbole' and be educated.

Farts though,

Some people's fart can suffocate someone shaa ,,

They'll just do the autopsy and be like "he died as a result of inhaling excess fart"