Please I need advice for my elder sister whose husband is a chronic cheat.Their marriage is about 2 years now with a son. She have whatsapp chat proof of his affairs with like 10 other girls. He gives her everything and hides these affairs but my sister is extremely smart. He cheated on her during their 9 years courtship with like 3 different girls that she knows of but she dint have enough proof and people including her inlaws begged her not to leave him without proof. Well fastforward to after marriage, he is still seeing those girls including new ones but this time she have enough proof.

The worst of all was her complains to my mum this morning. She said she discovered in a chat between her husband and one of the girls he dated that she dint initially have proof of that he wants to marry her secretly, that the lady initially aborted for him 3 times before and now he is begging her to get pregnant for him again and he will marry her secretly. Meanwhile he is still constantly chatting and sleeping with the remaining 9 or more others.

She also discovered in his chat the curses from another girl he promised marriage before abandoning her to marry my sister. The lady lamented on how he made her commit series of abortions in the name he was not ready yet and his responds was I want to fvck you tonight are you free?.

From the same whatsapp chat she discovered he gave another girl 10,000 naira to abort a pregnancy recently.
He also invited 3 other different girls from outside his state.
Please if I continue, this whole page will not be enough.

My mum was trying to advice her to save massively since she already have a 6months old baby for him because she cant take care of the baby alone in these hard times. But I think she should just quit.
Meanwhile her husband dosnt know she has all those proofs.

PLEASE I NEED MATURED ADVICE GUYS.
Note* He have refused to open any business for her so that she can be financially independent.

Two things: 1. She should pray if she believes In it. 2. She will be very wise if she walks away, even the in-laws can't help her.

Ur sister's husband is a serial cheat............and nothing she does will change him.........I hope she has been protecting herself during sexx wit him. There r only 2 options ,either she leaves him completely (divorce/separation) or she stays in d marriage and insists on using of condoms during sexx,so she can live long 4 d sake of son.

I'll wait for the elders of nairaland to cum
dis one big pass me

chizzy4love:
Please I need advice for my elder sister whose husband is a chronic cheat.Their marriage is about 2 years now with a son.she have whatsapp chat proof of his affairs with like 10 other girls.He gives her everything and hides these affairs but my sister is extremely smart.he cheated on her during their 9 years courtship with like 3 different girls that she knows off but she dint have enough proof and people including her in laws begged her not to leave him without proof.well fastforward to after marriage,he is still seeing those girls including new ones this time she have enough proof.
The worst of all was her complains to my mum this morning.she said she discovered in a chat between her husband and one of the girls he dated that she dint initially have proof of that he wants to marry her secretly,that the lady initially aborted for him 3 times before and now he is begging her to get pregnant for him again and he will marry her secretly.meanwhile he is still constantly chatting and sleeping with the remaining 9 or more others.
she also discovered in his chat the curses from another girl he promised marriage before abandoning her to marry my sister.the lady lamented on how he made her commit series of abortion in the name he was not ready yet and his responds was I want to fvck you tonight are you free?.
From thesame whatsapp chat she discovered he gave another girl 10,000 naira to abort a pregnancy.
He also invited 3 other different girls from outside his state.
Please if I continue,this whole page will not be enough.
my mum was trying to advice her to save massively since she already have a 6months old baby for him because she cant take care of the baby alone in these hard times.but I think she should just quit.
Meanwhile her husband dosnt know she has all those proofs.
PLEASE I NEED MATURED ADVICE GUYS.
Note* He have refused to open any business for her so that she can be financially independent.

most women are always attracted to this type of men, what your mom said is the truth, she need to find her standing financially before going anywhere, it's best if your family sorts that out first, HIV and hepatitis are real.

No need to ask for advice. Ur sister is a housewife and would have moved out but because she has no source of income that's why she's stuck.

Well duh, a man that cheats during courtship will surely cheat after marriage. What was your sister thinking when she decided to marry that man after signs of his cheating acts, even though she knows that she won't be ok with a cheating husband.

As for her moving forward, she currently depend on the man for financial support so she can't easily seperate from him. I don't believe the man can be made to change, so just have to decide whether she can put up with a man who cheats.

If she can't put up with a cheat, she should try to become financially independent of the man and separate from him.

She knew he was a chronic cheat when they were dating yet married him anyway, smh.

That man is a serial murderer!

Your sister has no job I guess. She saw a man that is financially OK and married him. Your sister never knew what attracted her to the man will also attract other girls to the man.

Who is paying the bills? Your sister or the husband? How much is your sister contributing to home upkeep? Maybe nothing. So why is she complaining? Is the man collecting money from her to sleep with those girls? Is he not meeting your sister's needs? Oh, your sister wants to have the man and all his money to herself, right?

This is one of the challenges of being a full dependant on your husband. It renders you incapacitated and you will have no say since you can't even feed yourself until your husband gives you money. She should allow the man to enjoy his money.

A women who depends on husband for virtually everything has lost respect and she should take whatever comes her way. Marrying a financially sound man has got its price.

abouzaid:
most women are always attracted to this type of men, what your mom said is the truth, she need to find her standing financially before going anywhere, it's best if your family sorts that out first, HIV and hepatitis are real.

my dad is the only one that can support her but he is not happy with her cos he warned her not to marry a man from his tribe and finish her masters first but she refused.

lofty900:
No need to ask for advice. Ur sister is a housewife and would have moved out but because she has no source of income that's why she's stuck.

She resigned her work so that she can live together with her husband but hasn't been able to get another job yet.

lofty900:
No need to ask for advice. Ur sister is a housewife and would have moved out but because she has no source of income that's why she's stuck.

She has some savings from her previous job just not enough,she said about 1.5m.thats why she needed her husband to open a business for her but he indirectly dosnt want her to work.

TheABOMINATION:
Well duh, a man that cheats during courtship will surely cheat after marriage. What was your sister thinking when she decided to marry that man after signs of his cheating acts, even though she knows that she won't be ok with a cheating husband.

As for her moving forward, she currently depend on the man for financial support so she can't easily seperate from him. I don't believe the man can be made to change, so just have to decide whether she can put up with a man who cheats.

If she can't put up with a cheat, she should try to become financially independent of the man and separate from him.

She dint have any proof during courtship.

NotOfThis:
She knew he was a chronic cheater when they were dating yet married him anyway. These type of men don't change. How financially-independent is she on her own?

She never knew he was a chronic cheat.she only have about 1.5m which she saved from her previous job before relocating to meet her husband.

blazer234:
Your sister has no job I guess. She saw a man that is financially OK and married him. Your sister never knew what attracted her to the man will also attract other girls to the man.

Who is paying the bills? Your sister or the husband? How much is your sister contributing to home upkeep? Maybe nothing. So why is she complaining? Is the man collecting money from her to sleep with those girls? Is he not meeting your sister's needs? Oh, your sister wants to have the man and all his money to herself, right?

This is one of the challenges of being a full dependant on your husband. It renders you incapacitated and you will have no say since you can't even feed yourself until your husband gives you money. She should allow the man to enjoy his money.
My sister never married him because of money.
in fact he said he married my sister because she dated him when he dint have a dime and moreover we are not from a poor home just that my dad is upset with her.
My sister never dated or married him because of his money.
in fact he said he married by sister because she started dating him when he had nothing.

A women who depends on husband for virtually everything has lost respect and she should take whatever comes her way. Marrying a financially sound man has got its price.

She wasn't fully dependent on him before marriage.My sister is an Economics and statistics graduate.she was working before they got married.she had to resign and relocate but unfortunately have not been able to get another job.

chizzy4love:

She wasn't fully dependent on him before marriage.My sister is an Economics and statistics graduate.she was working before they got married.she had to resign and relocate but unfortunately have not been able to get another job.

Oh. It is unfortunate that a cheating man can't stop cheating, except if God delivers him.

If your sister confronts him with the facts she has, it will only make him stop for a while, only to start again

blazer234:
Your sister has no job I guess. She saw a man that is financially OK and married him. Your sister never knew what attracted her to the man will also attract other girls to the man.

Who is paying the bills? Your sister or the husband? How much is your sister contributing to home upkeep? Maybe nothing. So why is she complaining? Is the man collecting money from her to sleep with those girls? Is he not meeting your sister's needs? Oh, your sister wants to have the man and all his money to herself, right?

This is one of the challenges of being a full dependant on your husband. It renders you incapacitated and you will have no say since you can't even feed yourself until your husband gives you money. She should allow the man to enjoy his money.

A women who depends on husband for virtually everything has lost respect and she should take whatever comes her way. Marrying a financially sound man has got its price.

Such coagulation of vile stupidity!

If idiocy were muscle power then the amount contained in this comment of yours is more than is required to bench press a third world nation.

blazer234:


Oh. It is unfortunate that a cheating man can't stop cheating, except if God delivers him.

If your sister confronts him with the facts she has, it will only make him stop for a while, only to start again

my mum also said the same thing.

Please, what's CHEATING...??

chizzy4love:

She wasn't fully dependent on him before marriage.My sister is an Economics and statistics graduate.she was working before they got married.she had to resign and relocate but unfortunately have not been able to get another job.

1.5 million is more than enough to start a lot of businesses, does she have a particular business in mind?

if ur sis has 1.5m like u said she does,starting over shdnt be difficult unless she doesnt really want to leave him.How much does it cost to rent a mini flat,get even if it is a teaching/clerical job and be doing biz besides. am sorry but ur sis sounds like someone that has her eyes on big things.i am a female,i cant hv even 1m and still be begging a guy to set me up.what for?

lotannad:
if ur sis has 1.5m like u said she does,starting over shdnt be difficult unless she doesnt really want to leave him.How much does it cost to rent a mini flat,get even if it is a teaching/clerical job and be doing biz besides. am sorry but ur sis sounds like someone that has her eyes on big things.i am a female,i cant hv even 1m and still be begging a guy to set me up.what for?

i noticed that too,she should even move back to her parents instead of renting a flat to reduce temptation from men.

abouzaid:
1.5 million is more than enough to start a lot of businesses, does she have a particular business in mind?

1.5 million can't start a proper boutique.it can't even cover her upkeep alone for 6 months.we are from a middle class background.Even I, as a single working class girl right now have way more than that in my account now and it's no money to me.after renting won't she furnish,feed herself and the baby.she already has a high standard of living.we are from middle class family .we live a comfortable life.so to me,1.5m is really nothing.trust me.
besides,she was earning about 150k every month before she resigned her job and lived in a 2 bedroom flat as a single girl.hope you understand now.

abouzaid:
i noticed that too,she should even move back to her parents instead of renting a flat to reduce temptation from men.

My dad won't take her in cos he was against the marriage from onset.

abouzaid:
i noticed that too,she should even move back to her parents instead of renting a flat to reduce temptation from men.

My dad won't take her in cos he was against the marriage from onset.You know how heart hardened politicians are.

lotannad:
if ur sis has 1.5m like u said she does,starting over shdnt be difficult unless she doesnt really want to leave him.How much does it cost to rent a mini flat,get even if it is a teaching/clerical job and be doing biz besides. am sorry but ur sis sounds like someone that has her eyes on big things.i am a female,i cant hv even 1m and still be begging a guy to set me up.what for?

She is an Economics and statistics 2:1 graduate and she already have a standard of living.I just pray she gets another job quickly.she has always been on a high salary before now so it will be really difficult for her to do a teaching or clerical job with peanut as pay.Hope you understand.
She just sacrificed her life for a cheating husband.

Then let her get a job. And plan her life from there. Its a very terrible situation that ur sister is in right now. U guys need to encourage her in any means possible.

The husband may never come back except through divine intervention because he is in a deep mess thinking that he is enjoying his life.

But I pray that by God's grace, the man comes back to his senses because he has long lost it.

chizzy4love:

1.5 million can't start a proper boutique.it can't even cover her upkeep alone for 6 months.we are from a middle class background.Even I, as a single working class girl right now have way more than that in my account now and it's no money to me.after renting won't she furnish,feed herself and the baby.she already has a high standard of living.we are from middle class family .we live a comfortable life.so to me,1.5m is really nothing.trust me.
besides,she was earning about 150k every month before she resigned her job and lived in a 2 bedroom flat as a single girl.hope you understand now.

so what do you want? These shows that you and your sister can plunge in headon into a problem just to maintain an unhappy lifestyle.
She resigned, married and followed her horseband because he is a money bag even quite aware of his cheating tendencies because he satisfy her every need.

light101:
Then let her get a job. And plan her life from there. Its a very terrible situation that ur sister is in right now. U guys need to encourage her in any means possible.

The husband may never come back except through divine intervention because he is in a deep mess thinking that he is enjoying his life.

But I pray that by God's grace, the man comes back to his senses because he has long lost it.

Fair enough.Thanks.She is still seriously searching for a job now.