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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him (4443 Views)
I Am Having Issues With My Brother’s Wife And Her Two Sisters / My Brother's Wife Served Me With Just A Meat Instead Of Two Meats / Don’t Kill Your Husband. This Is How To Deal With Him If He Is Cheating On You (2) (3) (4)
Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by MotherXmas(f): 8:35am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Ours is a very lovely family that most people around us admire. We have always got one another's back right from day one. Don't let me go into much details on that. I relate with my niece (a seven year old daughter of my brother) as if she is my daughter, so she is very close to me. She tells me things and I relate with her as if we are friends. Some days ago, while having some usual conversations with her she told me that there is this dude that her mum keeps seeing and she says she shouldn't let her dad know about him. She told me his name (I won't disclose that here because I know her mum may be reading this) and even described his house down the street. Then she asked me that 'Aunty, why doesn't mum want dad to know him? Is she doing something bad? Dad always tell me to be good to people if I want to go to heaven'. I nearly shed tears when I heard those words from her but I had to hide it and pretend that nothing happened. Now, my concern is that she confided in me that I should not tell her mum or dad. she even threatened that if I do, she will not 'be my friend again'. I love my brother, as a woman, I know a cheating woman is liable to kill her husband, I don't want to lose my brother now. I know some people may advise me to keep silent about this issue and let peace reign in my brother's family, but I want you all to consider the pain and regret that will fill my being when I eventually lose my brother. Also, the psychological effect that this adulterous act from my brother's wife will have on our little girl can never me measured. I feel for her. I need mature advice from fellow Nairalanders on what to do in this situation. I will also appreciate if concerned moderators in this section could also let this post get to front page so as to attract experienced parents, grand parents and marriage counselors to this post. Good enough, my sister in-law is also on Nairaland, she may stumble on this post and change her mind. This can also serve as a sermon to other women doing or planning to do same thing. Your children are not log of wood, they aren't morons, they know and understand what you are doing. As a mother, you are like the engine of a moving train, you move and they follow your path, so don't raise/train another LovePeddler. 7 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by poshestmina(f): 8:45am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Leave your brother's family alone and face YOURS.let him find out on his own! 9 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Nutase: 8:47am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Are you married? |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by pat1612(m): 8:48am On Mar 05, 2017 |
You are cheating your brother ![]() ![]() 4 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by MotherXmas(f): 8:54am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Having read this from you: "My boyfriend is a chronic drunk,it is all just pissing me off now.We haven't really been so close since we started dating Came to spend some days at his place and he goes straight to a bar after work and cones back drunk everyday. I am tired of talking to him and if I want to break up with him,he starts begging and calling everybody that knows both of us to beg me I feel it's a spiritual thing,he graduated with a good grade from school, has a good job(he ends up not saving a dime from it) ,intelligent too If he can't even 'pretend 'for the few days i'll be around, I wonder how it is when am not with him." Now I understand where this is coming from. poshestmina: I don't need to ask how old you are. Dear, It is not compulsory for you to comment and if you must, try read the post again as if you are reading a comprehension passage in your incoming exam, then assimilate and reason on how to respond (don't just post comment). 20 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by MotherXmas(f): 8:56am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Nutase: Yes I am. |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Yukov(m): 8:58am On Mar 05, 2017 |
It's very simple. Go and tell him. What happens next, don't come here and tell us. 2 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by ojun50(m): 9:03am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Women women women |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by 1miccza: 9:08am On Mar 05, 2017 |
It depends on your closeness to your brother. If you are truly close to your brother, invite him to your place or visit him or better still get somewhere neutral and then tell him. Keeping mute is much more dangerous 11 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by carzola(m): 9:10am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Cheating is a normal thing In marriages in Nigeria... Even if you tell your brother He wouldn't leave the wife At a long run they would Stop you from coming to Their house so you don't Ruin their sweet love I would advise you ignore What the kid told you moreover The kid has no details about the Affair her mum is having. You cant draw Conclusions based on "my mum is seeing a guy down the street and she said I shouldn't tell daddy" 1 Like |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by dozies: 9:26am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Send an anonymous note to your sister in-law warning her to stop or you may expose her also send same anonymous note to the guy and watch their next move 5 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Aquariann: 9:27am On Mar 05, 2017 |
poshestmina: After he must have contracted HIV from her right? Or 30 years later when she confesses she's not sure he's the father of the "second child" By the way, her brother is family too. Besides, at what point do we stop minding our business? Because this "mind your business", is why so much injustice and evil go on unchecked in our society. For example, we mind our business when that neighbour tortures their "child-maid" but rather than report to relevant authorities, we wait till the day we wake up to hear the child was beaten to death before we start talking about how the beatings has been going on for long. The problem with y'all advocate of "mind your business" is that when the tables are turned and you're the ones being short-changed, cheated, or facing one form of injustice, you'll want someone else to speak up on your behalf. Just last week, a guy created a thread complaining about teen girls below age 17 now openly moving around and sleeping with"idïots" twice their ages. But surprisingly a good number of the (surprisingly female) commenters asked him to mind his business. Then just yesterday, another lady created a thread about her 17 years old pregnant sister. Perhaps if someone had brought it to her notice the girl was "losing it", she would have said mind your business. Op, sorry for my rants. But if I were your brother, I'll appreciate to be given a heads up about my wife's possible infidelity 38 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Nobody: 9:27am On Mar 05, 2017 |
please leave your brothers family alone Don't destroy a home by telling your brother .besides your niece will lose all trust in you if u tell anyone and it might start affecting her later in life(she will lose trust in people) op let your brother finds out himself or confront the woman 2 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by poshestmina(f): 9:43am On Mar 05, 2017 |
If at all you are married as you claim ,you would be minding your own life and family instead of poking ur idle nose into someone else's marriage and who knows what your brother is doing behind aswell . As for the thread you dug up ,that was way back when women were girls ...FACE YOUR OWN MARRIAGE! 4 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by kurlarday: 9:59am On Mar 05, 2017 |
poshestmina: I'm sure you don't know anything about family bond. Despite the fact that I'm married, my brother remains my brother and my family remains my family. I still advise that you go through the OP's post once again or ask someone more mature to explain how it feels when you think you could have prevented a dangerous act after it had already happened. 7 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Aquariann: 10:11am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Evaberry: When it's a case of cheating, y'all sing "leave their family alone". But when it's a case of for example physical abuse, you'll encourage the victim to report to the same family members you want to stay out of their business? Destroy a home you say. Any man or woman who cheats on their partner has already kicked started the destruction of their himes with their own hands. So if reporting to the other partner would fast track the destruction process, them so be it. Why engage in acts capable of wrecking your home in the first place? 21 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by kurlarday: 10:18am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Aquariann: I couldn't have said it better bro. Double thumbs up to you. 5 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by WebSurfer(m): 10:37am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Aquariann: Dont mind all these yeye girls on nairaland , you can just understand they are birds of thesame feathers with the brothers wife 9 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by sisisioge: 10:47am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Babes, you already made your decision to blow the whistle, why ask for opinions? Better still, you could have written an open letter to your brother's wife to let her know you know and you may likely tell since she's here on NL. Anyways, in case you are still open to suggestions ...Biko stay out of this issue. Best you could do is give your brother very discreet pointers. It is well o...May God take care of your brother's business herein! 2 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Nobody: 11:00am On Mar 05, 2017 |
I'll advice u call ur brother's wife n talk to her like u discovered d whole thing urself. Hrt 2 hrt n who knows. U will get to hear Wat she got to say n look through her if she is really gonna stop or continue. Don't go to ur bro yet. Dats Wat am gonna do if am in ur shoes. Women of dez days.....nawa o. I pray for myself 3 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by yomi007k(m): 11:02am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Too many evil ppl around. ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Nobody: 11:07am On Mar 05, 2017 |
OP, go to the wife first and try to find out what's up. Meanwhile, you should be gathering evidence (that conversation should be the first ![]() ![]() |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by cotmag(m): 11:27am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Aquariann:You spoke my mind bro. Some of the women saying that she should leave the family alone are potential 'cheaters'. 6 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by SirVintageCock: 11:46am On Mar 05, 2017 |
Why not investigate first before blowing the whistle? There are lots of what ifs here. You wouldn't want to look like a fool by believing that the guy down the street is having an affair your sister in law just because your seven year old niece confided in you. She may even be innocent, who knows. Do not be the snitch here rather try to found out what's going. Source personal experience. 9 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Nutase: 12:25pm On Mar 05, 2017 |
MotherXmas:Good. I believe you will have the maturity to handle this. Do a little digging and have enough concrete evidence before talking to your brother. |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Richy4(m): 12:30pm On Mar 05, 2017 |
I don't know how this my stupid advise may sound... but please do not take it....just pretend as if I was thinking loud... Do not tell your brother>>>But you can got to the house that the kid described, politely asked that you want to see the guy(you mention the name the kid gave you) When he comes out, simply ask if he was indeed the guy so u won't give wrong message to another...Ask if he knows your brother's wife(mention) the name, if he says yes, simply tell him that she is a married woman that he should stay clear on whatever business he is doing with her....pretend as if you have seen and heard about them....tell him that Karma a bitch...That if he destroys your sister in law's home, tomorrow might be his own turn to be destroyed.....(all this chat must be done in cool posture do not act as if you came to fight)..Then you walk away with a clear conscience that you have done what a sister in law should do...without involving anyone.... Oh!! please do not take this advice serious..I was just thinking aloud..But if you want just give it a thought... 1 Like |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Nobody: 12:33pm On Mar 05, 2017 |
poshestmina: And when the cheating wife (if true) kills the brother, you go ask why she no do anything. |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Nobody: 12:42pm On Mar 05, 2017 |
Richy4: I disagree with you. The woman is the problem and not the guy. Even if the guy stops seeing her, will it stop the sis-in-law from cheating with another person? Her morality is the issue and not the guy's. I can advice my kids not to fight other kids outside but I won't be able to advice other kids outside not to fight my kids. My wife's faithfulness depends on her and not on men outside. For a cup to be clean, it had to be washed in and out and not only out. 6 Likes |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Richy4(m): 12:46pm On Mar 05, 2017 |
jusRadical: It will mean that whatever they are doing is now in the open...and the kind of person she is...It will be left for the woman to think about how to save her marriage....ie if she really wants to stay....she has been thinking that no one knows..everyone got conscience including cheats |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Nobody: 12:57pm On Mar 05, 2017 |
Richy4: Even if it becomes a public knowkedge will not quarantee her repentance or change of heart. She may decide to be more discreet next time. It is only a pure change of heart that will make her work on saving het home. The bulk lies on her desk. |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Richy4(m): 1:11pm On Mar 05, 2017 |
jusRadical: Yea I agree with you to some extend..There's no better way to look at a cheating partner that is cool<< We usually hear statements like a cheat will always be a cheat... In this case, the lady swore secrecy with the kid..that she will not tell the father nor the mother...But did not say not to talk to the man..If I were to be her, I will never break that secret bond....That's why I gave the option of talking to the guy... A lot of you might think what does the kid know...Ignore her and tell the father...But we all forget one thing integrity... 1 Like |
Re: Help! My Little Niece Confided In Me That My Brother's Wife Is Cheating On Him by Nobody: 1:17pm On Mar 05, 2017 |
Richy4: In this case, swearing secrecy is rubbish. So the secrecy and friendship with the minor is more important than the girl's family? I will break a friendship to save a soul any day, anytime. 1 Like |
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