Dear Future Wife,
I really don't know where to start cos there's a whole lot I want to pen down and it seems like there won't be place for pleasantries. Then again, it's my Missing Rib I'm addressing the letter to, how could I write without pleasantries? I mean, what loving husband does that, right? Besides, what would these spies reading your letter think of me?
So, how's my Angel doing? I miss you already - your smile, charm, those little spats, your cooking and the other things that go with marriage life. I hope everyday you wake up, every step you take leads you in the right direction towards achieving your set goals in life. Kudos if that's the case; if not, please redirect your steps. How are my in-laws doing? I presume they're doing great, hail and hearty. Extend my regards to them.
I'm writing you because there are some issues I need you to be aware of even before we finally meet. There are quite a lot of them but I'll pick just one - the WEDDING CEREMONY. I chose this not because it's the most important or most delicate, nah. It's just a ceremony. Rather, I chose it because there'd be no point discussing it after we've been pronounced Hubby and Wifey.
Dear Future Wife, I love you so much - believe me. If it were not so, I would have told you. As a matter of fact, that's one of the numerous reasons we get to be together. But you see that wedding ceremony called WHITE WEDDING aka WEDDING SOLEMNISATION, the SECOND MARRIAGE CEREMONY (SMC) that is commonly practised, I have no plans on engaging in that. I'm not saying I won't meet your parents or do all that is required of a suitor, I will. I'll pay the bride price, perform almost all (if not all) the marriage rights acceptable by your culture. I strongly believe that as a Christian and an African, the marriage ceremony validates our union. I see no reason why we should gather people days later (months in some cases) in the name of WEDDING SOLEMNISATION or the SMC.
Among the numerous reasons why we shouldn't go on with the SMC, here are a few.
1. IT IS A BORROWED CULTURE
Movies, video clips, books and a little research have shown that it is the marriage ceremony of the English and Americans. It is their own version of our Traditional Marriage Ceremony. Why perform two different marriage rights? Why say "I do" twice, like we didn't get you the first time? Why have the SMC like the first one was child's play? The insidious effect of the SMC is stealing all the glitz and glamour, riches, respect and show of our Traditional Marriages. We tend to pay more attention, respect and spend more on the SMC. This is not good for our culture. What's the need of an SMC? Is it rational?
2. IT IS A WASTE OF TIME, ENERGY AND RESOURCES
After the Traditional Marriage (TM), we sure as hell would be exhausted. Why begin preparation for the SMC when we should be resting or consummating our marriage? Why spend money and resources (SMCs are usually big budget projects no matter how low key the ceremony may seem to be) when we could start a better project with them? If our parents decide that they want to sponsor the SMC, we will ask them to direct the funds to the TM. Nothing spoil if we give out iPhones and TV sets as souvenir for the TM. So, why waste time, energy and resources? Is it rational?
3. WE'D BE DECEIVING OURSELVES (HOST AND GUEST)
When I attend SMCs and that statement is made, the one that ends with, ". . . or forever remain silent", I just wonder who is deceiving who. There was no objection when he went to see her parents, when he fulfilled all the marriage rights, not even when they feed themselves and kissed during the TM; you now think someone would just stand up, speak up, shut up and sit down, which then results in the annulment of the marriage. Is that what we think? I laugh in Ibibio. I don't even want to talk much about it. The whole SMC thing seems to me like a scripted play. I see no reason why I should invite people, perform for them and in the end feed them. Come on, Nollywood still de available.
Another funny statement I hear is usually from the Compere. "Let's watch as she performs her first duty of feeding the groom". Uhmm sorry, she feed him at the TM and that dance you called "their first dance" is actually their seventh dance. They danced about six times at the TM. Now I ask, Wifey, should we deceive ourselves and the guests in like manner? Is it rational?
4. WHATEVER REMINISCENCE YOU WANT TO HAVE ABOUT SMC CAN BE CREATED AT THE TM.
What are those lovely memories you'd love to create at the SMC, tell me during the marriage plans and I'll see to it that we create them during the TM - simple! Why the need for an SMC to have/crate an EPIC ceremony? Is it rational?
5. YOU DON'T GET TO HURT PEOPLE'S FEELINGS, BE HURT OR MAKE ENEMIES OF YOUR GUESTS.
My love, my Siseko, the only champagne in my glass, the only channel in my decoder, let's think this through. There's the possibility of a guest not being served food or drink, only toothpick. There's the possibility of making an enemy of someone because he/she wasn't given a souvenir at a wedding. There are quite a lot of scenarios that could play out resulting to hard feelings at a wedding ceremony (TM or SMC) - host or/and guest. Why double the chance of such an occurrence? "Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof". Why cause additional wahala? Is it rational?
Let me stop here since I planned on mentioning only a few. I hope you see reasons why we shouldn't think of SMC. I know you're learned, you've been taught to be rational in thoughts, words and actions; for that, I believe you buy my idea on the irrelevance of SMC.
I'm telling you this before hand so you don't allow family, friends or even society pressure you into having an SMC when you already know my (your future husband) stands on it. Remember, it's us against the world.
Be reminded though, that I won't love you any less if you succeed in arm-twisting me into having an SMC but rest assured that my love and respect for you is bound to increase exponentially if we skip the SMC.
I have to stop here now my Sherikoko. I hope to write you a couple more letters before we meet. I'm not promising though but I'll do my best to write you more often. Until then, keep being you - Big, Bold and Beautiful.


Your Pookie Bear,

Ochuko Oghenero Okpako

OP...
YOU TRY ooo,

TO GIVE YOU MY SISTER DEY HUNGRY ME

Your future wife might be in nairaland

suso:
OP...
YOU TRY ooo,

TO GIVE YOU MY SISTER DEY HUNGRY ME

Hope una no go pressurise her to do white wedding o. Lol

Macuberry:
Dear Future Wife,
I really don't know where to start cos there's a whole lot I want to pen down and it seems like there won't be place for pleasantries. Then again, it's my Missing Rib I'm addressing the letter to, how could I write without pleasantries? I mean, what loving husband does that, right? Besides, what would these spies reading your letter think of me?
So, how's my Angel doing? I miss you already - your smile, charm, those little spats, your cooking and the other things that go with marriage life. I hope everyday you wake up, every step you take leads you in the right direction towards achieving your set goals in life. Kudos if that's the case; if not, please redirect your steps. How are my in-laws doing? I presume they're doing great, hail and hearty. Extend my regards to them.
I'm writing you because there are some issues I need you to be aware of even before we finally meet. There are quite a lot of them but I'll pick just one - the WEDDING CEREMONY. I chose this not because it's the most important or most delicate, nah. It's just a ceremony. Rather, I chose it because there'd be no point discussing it after we've been pronounced Hubby and Wifey.
Dear Future Wife, I love you so much - believe me. If it were not so, I would have told you. As a matter of fact, that's one of the numerous reasons we get to be together. But you see that wedding ceremony called WHITE WEDDING aka WEDDING SOLEMNISATION, the SECOND MARRIAGE CEREMONY (SMC) that is commonly practised, I have no plans on engaging in that. I'm not saying I won't meet your parents or do all that is required of a suitor, I will. I'll pay the bride price, perform almost all (if not all) the marriage rights acceptable by your culture. I strongly believe that as a Christian and an African, the marriage ceremony validates our union. I see no reason why we should gather people days later (months in some cases) in the name of WEDDING SOLEMNISATION or the SMC.
Among the numerous reasons why we shouldn't go on with the SMC, here are a few.
1. IT IS A BORROWED CULTURE
Movies, video clips, books and a little research have shown that it is the marriage ceremony of the English and Americans. It is their own version of our Traditional Marriage Ceremony. Why perform two different marriage rights? Why say "I do" twice, like we didn't get you the first time? Why have the SMC like the first one was child's play? The insidious effect of the SMC is stealing all the glitz and glamour, riches, respect and show of our Traditional Marriages. We tend to pay more attention, respect and spend more on the SMC. This is not good for our culture. What's the need of an SMC? Is it rational?
2. IT IS A WASTE OF TIME, ENERGY AND RESOURCES
After the Traditional Marriage (TM), we sure as hell would be exhausted. Why begin preparation for the SMC when we should be resting or consummating our marriage? Why spend money and resources (SMCs are usually big budget projects no matter how low key the ceremony may seem to be) when we could start a better project with them? If our parents decide that they want to sponsor the SMC, we will ask them to direct the funds to the TM. Nothing spoil if we give out iPhones and TV sets as souvenir for the TM. So, why waste time, energy and resources? Is it rational?
3. WE'D BE DECEIVING OURSELVES (HOST AND GUEST)
When I attend SMCs and that statement is made, the one that ends with, ". . . or forever remain silent", I just wonder who is deceiving who. There was no objection when he went to see her parents, when he fulfilled all the marriage rights, not even when they feed themselves and kissed during the TM; you now think someone would just stand up, speak up, shut up and sit down, which then results in the annulment of the marriage. Is that what we think? I laugh in Ibibio. I don't even want to talk much about it. The whole SMC thing seems to me like a scripted play. I see no reason why I should invite people, perform for them and in the end feed them. Come on, Nollywood still de available.
Another funny statement I hear is usually from the Compere. "Let's watch as she performs her first duty of feeding the groom". Uhmm sorry, she feed him at the TM and that dance you called "their first dance" is actually their seventh dance. They danced about six times at the TM. Now I ask, Wifey, should we deceive ourselves and the guests in like manner? Is it rational?
4. WHATEVER REMINISCENCE YOU WANT TO HAVE ABOUT SMC CAN BE CREATED AT THE TM.
What are those lovely memories you'd love to create at the SMC, tell me during the marriage plans and I'll see to it that we create them during the TM - simple! Why the need for an SMC to have/crate an EPIC ceremony? Is it rational?
5. YOU DON'T GET TO HURT PEOPLE'S FEELINGS, BE HURT OR MAKE ENEMIES OF YOUR GUESTS.
My love, my Siseko, the only champagne in my glass, the only channel in my decoder, let's think this through. There's the possibility of a guest not being served food or drink, only toothpick. There's the possibility of making an enemy of someone because he/she wasn't given a souvenir at a wedding. There are quite a lot of scenarios that could play out resulting to hard feelings at a wedding ceremony (TM or SMC) - host or/and guest. Why double the chance of such an occurrence? "Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof". Why cause additional wahala? Is it rational?
Let me stop here since I planned on mentioning only a few. I hope you see reasons why we shouldn't think of SMC. I know you're learned, you've been taught to be rational in thoughts, words and actions; for that, I believe you buy my idea on the irrelevance of SMC.
I'm telling you this before hand so you don't allow family, friends or even society pressure you into having an SMC when you already know my (your future husband) stands on it. Remember, it's us against the world.
Be reminded though, that I won't love you any less if you succeed in arm-twisting me into having an SMC but rest assured that my love and respect for you is bound to increase exponentially if we skip the SMC.
I have to stop here now my Sherikoko. I hope to write you a couple more letters before we meet. I'm not promising though but I'll do my best to write you more often. Until then, keep being you - Big, Bold and Beautiful.


Your Pookie Bear,

Ochuko Oghenero Okpako

Seun come and see...

hehe ............op op op! HOW MANY TIME DO I CALLETH THOU

Beautiful

Really concise.

hmmmmm

Beautiful @op