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I Need Help Fixing Myself - Family - Nairaland

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I Need Help Fixing Myself by somebody123: 9:33am On May 02, 2017
I'll make this very brief. i am married to the best guy ever but i feel i have been damaged a lot( mainly due to my upbringing) and its drastically affecting my relationship with my husband.
My husband is someone who enjoys communicating and expressing his feelings which i love but i on the other hand don't take matters so well. I take matters to heart and feel bad whenever i am been criticized or been told the bitter truth and i don't like been wrong or corrected.
I brought my matter here so i can at least get help on ways to communicate freely without holding things to heart.
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by Nobody: 9:36am On May 02, 2017
I'll give you the only advice nairalanders like giving. "sit down with ur spouse and talk to him" cheesy

3 Likes

Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by somebody123: 9:38am On May 02, 2017
we have talked about it and we both know thats the problem.
lofty900:
I'll give you the only advice nairalanders like giving. "sit down with ur spouse and talk to him" cheesy
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by Nobody: 11:47am On May 02, 2017
Since you've talked about it with your hubby, the next thing you should do is go for counseling/therapy and deal with those underlying issues.

somebody123:
we have talked about it and we both know thats the problem.

4 Likes

Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by abescom: 1:28pm On May 02, 2017
My wife Mrs abescom is that you?

2 Likes

Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by yvelchstores(f): 2:05pm On May 02, 2017
I can totally relate to u on how our upbringing affects our marriage. I bought a book from a lady who sells e books here on naira land. I bought a book that transformed my life, 'created to be his help meet ''by Debbi Pearl .the book is such a huge blessing. I really don't know how dm works here, I would have said u should send your email so I forward the book to u. All the best.

1 Like

Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by somebody123: 2:28pm On May 02, 2017
loooool...No Mr Abesocom
abescom:
My wife Mrs abescom is that you?

1 Like

Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by somebody123: 2:29pm On May 02, 2017
I'll send you a DM
yvelchstores:
I can totally relate to u on how our upbringing affects our marriage. I bought a book from a lady who sells e books here on naira land. I bought a book that transformed my life, 'created to be his help meet ''by Debbi Pearl .the book is such a huge blessing. I really don't know how dm works here, I would have said u should send your email so I forward the book to u. All the best.
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by somebody123: 2:31pm On May 02, 2017
i have considered this..i'll appreciate if you can link me up with a therapist. thanks
NotOfThis:
Since you've talked about it with your hubby, the next thing you should do is go for counseling/therapy and deal with those underlying issues.

Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by yvelchstores(f): 2:39pm On May 02, 2017
somebody123:
I'll send you a DM
that's the thing. I opened naira land with a business email I don't hv access to. Sorry abt that. U can look for the thread here in family section .that's where I saw it
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by yvelchstores(f): 2:44pm On May 02, 2017
0705 150 5626 this is their number I saved. Ask them for 'created to be his help meet by Debbi pearl.
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by somebody123: 2:47pm On May 02, 2017
ok
yvelchstores:
that's the thing. I opened naira land with a business email I don't hv access to. Sorry abt that. U can look for the thread here in family section .that's where I saw it
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by somebody123: 2:47pm On May 02, 2017
thank you very much
yvelchstores:
0705 150 5626 this is their number I saved. Ask them for 'created to be his help meet by Debbi pearl.

1 Like

Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by nnamdibig(m): 3:24pm On May 02, 2017
The easiest way to solve a problem is admitting your own fault.....i tell you that the problem is 60-70% solved. All you need now is to start working on yourself. Those things that he does that makes you angry, stop taking it to heart by always telling yourself that this man will not intentionally make me angry and he just did it by mistake and as human, mistake is allowed.
With time you will be surprised how fast things will change.

1 Like

Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by Nic3(f): 3:42pm On May 02, 2017
yvelchstores:
I can totally relate to u on how our upbringing affects our marriage. I bought a book from a lady who sells e books here on naira land. I bought a book that transformed my life, 'created to be his help meet ''by Debbi Pearl .the book is such a huge blessing. I really don't know how dm works here, I would have said u should send your email so I forward the book to u. All the best.
please can I have the book too?
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by Eketem: 3:54pm On May 02, 2017
First step is admitting there is a problem which you have done.

This happens when one has verbally abusive parents who will leave the issue and start attacking the person.

Now you have to reach the point when you realise your husband is not attacking you but disagreeing over an issue.

Issues will come and go and you will resolve it like every other couple it doesn't make you a bad person if your spouse doesn't like some things it only makes you human like everyone.
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by somebody123: 4:15pm On May 02, 2017
yeah..thanks..i think i'll stop looking at every issue as an attack. thank you
Eketem:
First step is admitting there is a problem which you have done.

This happens when one has verbally abusive parents who will leave the issue and start attacking the person.

Now you have to reach the point when you realise your husband is not attacking you but disagreeing over an issue.

Issues will come and go and you will resolve it like every other couple it doesn't make you a bad person if your spouse doesn't like some things it only makes you human like everyone.

1 Like

Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by somebody123: 4:16pm On May 02, 2017
thank you..i'll start working on myself
nnamdibig:
The easiest way to solve a problem is admitting your own fault.....i tell you that the problem is 60-70% solved. All you need now is to start working on yourself. Those things that he does that makes you angry, stop taking it to heart by always telling yourself that this man will not intentionally make me angry and he just did it by mistake and as human, mistake is allowed.
With time you will be surprised how fast things have changed.

1 Like

Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by yvelchstores(f): 6:42pm On May 02, 2017
Nic3:
please can I have the book too?
I will be glad to give u but can't access dm. If u can send me an email address, fine .the book is worth a million bucks n more.
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by teeteelardey(f): 8:55pm On May 02, 2017
Please send to me atomicbabetee@yahoo.com ...i'll appreciate it a lot
yvelchstores:
I will be glad to give u but can't access dm. If u can send me an email address, fine .the book is worth a million bucks n more.
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by kimberyl: 9:45pm On May 02, 2017
yvelchstores:
I will be glad to give u but can't access dm. If u can send me an email address, fine .the book is worth a million bucks n more.
@yvelchstores, please if you don't mind, I will like to gave the book as well. email: kemzene@yahoo.com
Thank you
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by baby124: 12:20am On May 03, 2017
Move on from your past and forgive yourself. Try to practice speaking your mind, it is so relieving. You can start by making sure you never leave issues unresolved till the next day.
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by Juliearth(f): 6:49am On May 03, 2017
yvelchstores:
I can totally relate to u on how our upbringing affects our marriage. I bought a book from a lady who sells e books here on naira land. I bought a book that transformed my life, 'created to be his help meet ''by Debbi Pearl .the book is such a huge blessing. I really don't know how dm works here, I would have said u should send your email so I forward the book to u. All the best.


Please,can I PM you too in respect to the book?
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by yvelchstores(f): 8:27am On May 03, 2017
teeteelardey:
Please send to me atomicbabetee@yahoo.com ...i'll appreciate it a lot
sent
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by yvelchstores(f): 8:28am On May 03, 2017
kimberyl:

@yvelchstores, please if you don't mind, I will like to gave the book as well. email: kemzene@yahoo.com
Thank you
sent
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by yvelchstores(f): 8:31am On May 03, 2017
Juliearth:



Please,can I PM you too in respect to the book?
sorry I don't have access to that pm. If you are not OK posting your email here, just create a new one and. Paste here. Bless u.
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by Juliearth(f): 9:50am On May 03, 2017
yvelchstores:
sorry I don't have access to that pm. If you are not OK posting your email here, just create a new one and. Paste here. Bless u.


Okay, janetdauda825@gmail.com Thank you!
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by somebody123: 9:53am On May 03, 2017
thank you
yvelchstores:
sent
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by somebody123: 9:54am On May 03, 2017
i think i need to do this. thanks
baby124:
Move on from your past and forgive yourself. Try to practice speaking your mind, it is so relieving. You can start by making sure you never leave issues unresolved till the next day.
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by Dera25(m): 2:24pm On May 03, 2017
yvelchstores:
sorry I don't have access to that pm. If you are not OK posting your email here, just create a new one and. Paste here. Bless u.
Please I need the book too, derastainless@gmail.com Thanks
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by Nobody: 5:48pm On May 03, 2017
Congratulations
You are on your way to total recovery...
Just take it easy on yourself
Re: I Need Help Fixing Myself by smileshinz(f): 10:54am On May 04, 2017
yvelchstores:
I will be glad to give u but can't access dm. If u can send me an email address, fine .the book is worth a million bucks n more.
pls, send to me too sunshinzx01@gmail.com. thanks

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