I am a man of many phobias, fear of chickens and tolotolo, fear of heights, fear of tight spaces, fear of disordered pictures, so so many are they that my monicker should simply be EGWU.

the phobia that almost resulted in my commuting murder is my fear of water. last two years, before the oil crash , God picked my call and I got an opportunity in the oil and gas industry (all the babes don't bother with the pm's cos I lost that job) so without notice I was expected to go by boat to Bonny to see one strong man like that. I decided to wait for the covered boat as I couldn't dare see myself in the uncovered one. the journey to Bonny was pretty straight forward while I tried my utmost to keep my bowels from rupturing it's contents out of fear.

on sighting land, joy overwhelmed me and I hoped my return journey will be similarly smooth in 3days time. on the morning of my return journey there was just one boat. many boaters claimed they won't work today cos the sea would be rough since its been raining cats and dog all through. stupid me trying to save up on hotel bill jumped in with some LNG workers and some corpers. I selected a place hidden inside to sit in hope that the shark will likely eat up others before it can get to yours truly.

the journey began and due to rough seas, another longer route was taken which made us delve farther into the ocean than we normally should. suddenly the rains trippled. the sea kept rising and falling. I thank God for the water that kept splashing inside as it hid the tears flowing down my cheeks. I was in this mod of sober reflection when on corpers suddenly got up and said he wants to stand at the middle of the boat cos rain was beating him. the boat driver ran mad in anger as boaters tend to sit people according to weight to prevent a capsize and the actions of the boy was clearly dis_ stabilizing the weight balance. all efforts to get this boy to sit down fell on deaf ears, the boat driver and his engine man confessed to us all that they have lost one engine and are managing just one and hoping we get to ph in time and we better warn that useless corper.

this boy vehemently refused because the water from the rain was touching him, suddenly the last engine lost power, once I heard it, my anal sphincter lost pressure. I knew death by drowning has finally come my way, I queried why I am so stingy to a fault, I cursed the so called strong man who insisted I embarked on this terrible journey. till I observed a scuffle, water has started seeping into The obanise boat, the boat driver , his engine boy and the corpse were in a scuffle as they attempted to throw him over board. since water was rushing into the boat and many were already crying and panicking, coupled the fact that we were abit off route and other boats aren't coming to even aid any rescue effort, some passengers including me joined the driver and we threw the corper over board.

we started the single engine and it gave power while we tried scooping out water with our bare hands, we moved abit while watching that young man bouncing in the water, crying, calling all his ancestors in different languages to come save him. due to the heavy rains and waves in less than two minutes he had gone far away from us heading into the ocean ( he was floating as we all have life vest on). we went back to him and asked him say hope now he won't be bothered by the trickles of rain anymore.

he swore amidst tears and promised good behavior, the engine boy dived in and dragged him into the boat. he sat quietly in the rain till the end of the journey.

I asked the driver what would have happened if the boat had capsized and he looked at me and laughed. he said " see my hands, see my engine boy's hands Na bicep full am, I will swim from here to ph or Bonny and in three days come and get my boat and whoever is left".

I looked at my bicepless hands and knew that enough is enough. I have officially divorced water. goodnight

omg Pele

Seriously I've experienced same fate in that body of water.



I do tell people that I'm not scared of death but when everything broke loose that's when i knew that I'm not even born again and Heaven and Hell might be real

my brother Eddygourdo how you dey...Thank baba God for your life

Hahahaha OP you can't kii me with laugh o

Cholls:
my brother Eddygourdo how you dey...Thank baba God for your life

I dey my guy. e Don tey. how your side

Choi. ....I don laff belle scatter. Op thank God the boat did not capsized. However I will like to assure u that the water ways are the safest ever.

Dfinex:
Choi. ....I don laff belle scatter. Op thank God the boat did not capsized. However I will like to assure u that the water ways are the safest ever.

really? safest? with fishes everywhere? with drowning a possibility? mba. Na na na

Eddygourdo:
I am a man of many phobias, fear of chickens and tolotolo, fear of heights, fear of tight spaces, fear of disordered pictures, so so many are they that my monicker should simply be EGWU.

the phobia that almost resulted in my commuting murder is my fear of water. last two years, before the oil crash , God picked my call and I got an opportunity in the oil and gas industry (all the babes don't bother with the pm's cos I lost that job) so without notice I was expected to go by boat to Bonny to see one strong man like that. I decided to wait for the covered boat as I couldn't dare see myself in the uncovered one. the journey to Bonny was pretty straight forward while I tried my utmost to keep my bowels from rupturing it's contents out of fear.

on sighting land, joy overwhelmed me and I hoped my return journey will be similarly smooth in 3days time. on the morning of my return journey there was just one boat. many boaters claimed they won't work today cos the sea would be rough since its been raining cats and dog all through. stupid me trying to save up on hotel bill jumped in with some LNG workers and some corpers. I selected a place hidden inside to sit in hope that the shark will likely eat up others before it can get to yours truly.

the journey began and due to rough seas, another longer route was taken which made us delve farther into the ocean than we normally should. suddenly the rains trippled. the sea kept rising and falling. I thank God for the water that kept splashing inside as it hid the tears flowing down my cheeks. I was in this mod of sober reflection when on corpers suddenly got up and said he wants to stand at the middle of the boat cos rain was beating him. the boat driver ran mad in anger as boaters tend to sit people according to weight to prevent a capsize and the actions of the boy was clearly dis_ stabilizing the weight balance. all efforts to get this boy to sit down fell on deaf ears, the boat driver and his engine man confessed to us all that they have lost one engine and are managing just one and hoping we get to ph in time and we better warn that useless corper.

this boy vehemently refused because the water from the rain was touching him, suddenly the last engine lost power, once I heard it, my anal sphincter lost pressure. I knew death by drowning has finally come my way, I queried why I am so stingy to a fault, I cursed the so called strong man who insisted I embarked on this terrible journey. till I observed a scuffle, water has started seeping into The obanise boat, the boat driver , his engine boy and the corpse were in a scuffle as they attempted to throw him over board. since water was rushing into the boat and many were already crying and panicking, coupled the fact that we were abit off route and other boats aren't coming to even aid any rescue effort, some passengers including me joined the driver and we threw the corper over board.

we started the single engine and it gave power while we tried scooping out water with our bare hands, we moved abit while watching that young man bouncing in the water, crying, calling all his ancestors in different languages to come save him. due to the heavy rains and waves in less than two minutes he had gone far away from us heading into the ocean ( he was floating as we all have life vest on). we went back to him and asked him say hope now he won't be bothered by the trickles of rain anymore.

he swore amidst tears and promised good behavior, the engine boy dived in and dragged him into the boat. he sat quietly in the rain till the end of the journey.

I asked the driver what would have happened if the boat had capsized and he looked at me and laughed. he said " see my hands, see my engine boy's hands Na bicep full am, I will swim from here to ph or Bonny and in three days come and get my boat and whoever is left".

I looked at my bicepless hands and knew that enough is enough. I have officially divorced water. goodnight

I admire the way you write .

Lol
Laugh wan kee me for here
I used to think I wasn't scared of water because I go to the pool to swim a lot until I went to Benue state one certain time and my friend suggested that we cross over to nasarawa I think through the sea.
Bros when we got to a place that I couldn't see land and we were without life jacket,that was when I knew that swimming pool and river no be thesame thing!

[bI asked the driver what would have happened if the boat had capsized and he looked at me and laughed. he said " see my hands, see my engine boy's hands Na bicep full am, I will swim from here to ph or Bonny and in three days come and get my boat and whoever is left".][/b]


now here is the death of me

hahahhh

Nice one

Hehehehe, some peeps be forming bado until they come face to face with dead that's when you will know that humans can fear...two things that dreads me, deep sea and height....as for that bonny and abonnema i don't know what on earth will take me closed to those places....maybe except my quest to work in offshore.

you just cracked me up bro..... my evening is made already...

Eddygourdo:
really? safest? with fishes everywhere? with drowning a possibility? mba. Na na na

Hunie can we go for a swim on the beach? Don't say no

MarshRiley:
Lol
Laugh wan kee me for here
I used to think I wasn't scared of water because I go to the pool to swim a lot until I went to Benue state one certain time and my friend suggested that we cross over to nasarawa I think through the sea.
Bros when we got to a place that I couldn't see land and we were without life jacket,that was when I knew that swimming pool and river no be thesame thing!

So, before then you thought swimming pool and river were the same?

Yuneehk:

Hunie can we go for a swim on the beach? Don't say no

hahahahaha you wanna kill sumborri. swim? not even entering a boat, but an actual swim by me? hahahahaha you just wanna laugh at a weeping old man

QuietHammer:

So, before then you thought swimming pool and river were the same?

Use your head bro!

Himm. That boat driver was probably joking 'cause he couldn't have swam from Bonny to PH no matter his expertise in swimming. Fatigue could have made him drown.

In Rihanna's voice

"Just gonna stand here and watch me laugh, that's alright cos I love the way you write, I love the way you write "

MarshRiley:

Use your head bro!

Man, you took that serious?... even with the meme?

What you guys did to that corper ehn.

Eddygourdo:
hahahahaha you wanna kill sumborri. swim? not even entering a boat, but an actual swim by me? hahahahaha you just wanna laugh at a weeping old man

You never want to overcome this fear? If you get a very good job that'll require you be on the sea most of the time, you'll decline because of your phobia for water?

QuietHammer:

Man, you took that serious?... even with the meme?

lol,didnt bro
That's why I added the "bro" to my reply

MarshRiley:

lol,didnt bro
That's why I added the "bro" to my reply

mah nigga

Yuneehk:

You never want to overcome this fear? If you get a very good job that'll require you be on the sea most of the time, you'll decline because of your phobia for water?

so it's overcomeable? hmmmmm my dear I will take such job of course and buy towels to wipe my tears often. I can't stand the thought of dying in such a huge pool of water or being food to fishes. it gives me the creeps. so let me ask water no matter the size doesn't scare you?

Eddygourdo:
really? safest? with fishes everywhere? with drowning a possibility? mba. Na na na

brotherly how many times have u heard that people died of boat accidents? the possibility of u dying in a water accident is way lower than land or air accidents reason is because it rarely occurs and if it does occur u can stay afloat for a while till rescue comes.

so try to forget all ur fears and focus on the beauty of creation, sooner than later u would have outgrown all ur fears.

You can write o, I laughed so damn hard.

Mine is lizard, I have a terrible phobia for lizards or anything related to their family.

That was how I ran out of the bathroom screaming crazily when I sighted one in the bathroom window. My dad had to drive it away before I could enter.

Last month I saw one under my shoe, you don't wanna know how long I shouted.

I prefer to see a snake than a lizard. Ewwww, their legs and head so irritating to me. Ewwww.

Eddygourdo:
so it's overcomeable? hmmmmm my dear I will take such job of course and buy towels to wipe my tears often. I can't stand the thought of dying in such a huge pool of water or being food to fishes. it gives me the creeps. so let me ask water no matter the size doesn't scare you?

funny enough my dad use to work in bonny wen I was like 10 to 12 years old. The very first time he took I and my younger sister to bonny for holidays , that's one month.
We got to town to enter boat I was so happy bro. U needed to see my face small pikin Nah wetin him wan fear Nah. We left I could remember we got to an extent were only trees and u just see the sky on top the sea.

The kind piss wah hungry me ehh. Only God know. The guy just stop I pee finish him move as we were going the water splashed I just tasted it chai Nah salt ooo..


We got to bonny my papa carry us go beach every Sunday see Oyinbo every I just dey swim but I no dey go inside. Cu's there were stories of water taking people then. We came back to pH after one month. We enter gov odili boat back to pH if u enter oboy u no go no wen u go reach were u dey go. That was when I was now frequenting bonny. I don't have phobia for water I even wen for burial in opobo some years back. Am use to water.

My phobia is height that's one thing I fear like mad.

Ginaz:
You can write o, I laughed so damn hard.

Mine is lizard, I have a terrible phobia for lizards or anything related to their family.

That was how I ran out of the bathroom screaming crazily when I sighted one in the bathroom window. My dad had to drive it away before I could enter.

Last month I saw one under my shoe, you don't wanna know how long I shouted.

I prefer to see a snake than a lizard. Ewwww, their legs and head so irritating to me. Ewwww.

snake I will kill you and the snake ... The worst creature I hate on earth. Make lion kill me instead of snake.. God forbid.. Lizard is my friend. webI was small still in primary school wen I come I and my friend we go hunting for red neck lizard. We build house with sand on our legs and make a window and put that locozade bottle then it has wrapper tied round it ..them we put our lizrad inside and close the door for hours.. Lol