Frankcastle:
There is no destruction of any original cultures and oppression of women in any process. A woman has a role to play in a home. So much as a man does. And as well the children. The destruction is coming from people who have now felt that those roles should be reversed. It begs a question nowadays that women are quick to shout female oppression but yet claim they are equal to men. Y'all should make up your minds. If you are not thr weaker sex and are equal, why keep asking for protection. Nevertheless, you are a hopeless feminist that cannot reason beyond what you have come to make yourself.... wish u success and peace in the life you choose.

It's obvious you are practising your writing skills on nairaland.
How can you sumbit your opinion and end up being insultive and rude? Since you are afraid of the word 'Feminism' like most ignorant men,let me inform you that my intial post has nothing do with feminism rather it is tied to the way things were before Western civilization.
I started off by asking the Op to specify which African cultures have women demonstrating relevance by kneeling to serve a man? If it is practiced only in his culture,then i don't expect him to make a general statement.
Is this a pan-African culture or the fact that modern men believe that women can only demonstrate respect by bending down before men? These are some of the question i raised in my initial post.

There are different primary roles for women and as well as that of men which differs across cultures and i make emphasis of my culture to avoid ambiguity. A culture that pushed women to hold their place in the society and bring money home at the end of the day.
So what is your problem?
The fact that i mentioned that the Bible and Quran has destroyed the position of women in the society and has reduced them to mere second class citizens? To lay about,produce kids,serve you and be completely dependent on you.
Or the fact that you are shook by feminism?
You are a bloody anti-feminist fool!
My post is tied to the place and position of womanhood in the untinted African society.



Weaker sex? That is still part of the Western civilization.
Protection? A responsible man knows he should not beat,assault and violate women and girls.
In the African culture, a man that does that is either sold off to slavery or sanctioned by the authorities and he is required to a make a public apology to women.
Yes! Western Civilization has watered down the strenght of an African woman.
Don't say this thrash to Matrilineal and Matriarchal African cultures where women rule their homes.

mikolo80:



Right out the gate
Dependency theory
My dear theyCHOSE e to marry cheats and beaters
Till today they still have terrible CHOICE in men
Must have to do with strong
genesNobody wants to get married to a wimp
Makes the whole species unsafe




Rat poison in his meals would have sorted this out but the women CHOSE to allow their daughters rape to go unanswered




We all have a CHOICE to make
Na dem CHOOSE to marry beasts (strong genes)



Even a slave has CHOICE
not to marry the bad guys but till tmrw they will CHOOSE to marry animals over good guys so they should carry their cross


you are treated with the respect you accord yourself

Which Africa do you live in? Is it not the one where girls were sold to grown men? Is it not the one where parents forced girls into marriage for money? Is it not the one who forced girls to become second, thirds and fourth wives? Yes the alternative would have been starvation or death. You are right. They surely had a choice.

Oga 9ce, I can get a woman who will be kneeling down for you 24/7 in my village. As for me, I don't want such; one man's food is another man's poison.

DucheSsMerezz:

Chisos .. 'An slowpoke'

question nairaland moderator that changed it to slowpoke to make it look less offensive. ...I wrote "an idiot"

Moreoffaith:


So AlQuran and Hadith says when you are submissive and do what pleases ur husband you are a slave

Ask yourself when you were young, whats the percentage of divorce then and now..

Anifat please respect your culture and see where it takes you to.

Thanks for the mention. We don't have to see things the same way.

TinaAnita:


One wonders why you are so pained by my comment as if I have personal dealings with you? Your overreaction was uncalled for as my post was not directed to you.

Why should I bury my pride and do all that shit for a man who lacks humility? The least I expect from my man is sheer humility, is that asking for too much?

Had it been you know me in person you won't say thrash about me. I know how to make a man feel like a demigod but not when I have issues with his atttitude because To Whom Much Is Given Much Is Expected. One Good Turn Deserves another bruh.

Gimme a break!

no man will ask you to treat him like a demigod. All what he will ask of you is to treat him like a man, a real man, a king and in return you will feel like a woman, a real woman, a queen.

Leave stories for the gods. No one asks for it.

APCmyheart:



That's not my point, Immediately you get married your husband become your father and you become his mother..


Even if your parents want you to come over to see them, They have to first call your husband and get his consent first..

.great then maybe it was your wording.i agree but my parents need not call my husband for consent,why?cause i'll be the one to ask my husband for consent because we are in a RELATIONSHIP(marriage) and likewise him if he needs to go someplace he also need my consent because we are in a relationship.Even though i can't stop him because he's the hubby atleast he acknowlegdes my presence.So marriage is two ways,companionship.just as 2 people living together leaning on eachother,acknowledging eachother,respecting eachother.the man is the leader but that doesn't mean he can't take advice from his wife.Thanks

onedayatime:

no man will ask you to treat him like a demigod. All what he will ask of you is to treat him like a man, a real man, a king and in return you will feel like a woman, a real woman, a queen.

Leave stories for the gods. No one asks for it.

by kneeling down and giving him food?lol

onedayatime:

no man will ask you to treat him like a demigod. All what he will ask of you is to treat him like a man, a real man, a king and in return you will feel like a woman, a real woman, a queen.

Leave stories for the gods. No one asks for it.

If I decide to treat my man like a demigod my business not yours

angelanto8:
by kneeling down and giving him food?lol

you say so

TinaAnita:

If I decide to treat my man like a demigod my business not yours

topic on this matter close with you.

Oshisco plc

tintingz:
I don't believe in bible.

Good for you then..

angelanto8:
.great then maybe it was your wording.i agree but my parents need not call my husband for consent,why?cause i'll be the one to ask my husband for consent because we are in a RELATIONSHIP(marriage) and likewise him if he needs to go someplace he also need my consent because we are in a relationship.Even though i can't stop him because he's the hubby atleast he acknowlegdes my presence.So marriage is two ways,companionship.just as 2 people living together leaning on eachother,acknowledging eachother,respecting eachother.the man is the leader but that doesn't mean he can't take advice from his wife.Thanks

How about in case where your parent ask you to come over and your hubby decline saying not today?

I know that God asked us to submit to him but I have never come across hat verse where God talked about submission to humans. Can you please show me anywhere in the Quran God asked another human to submit to another human beings?

You also need to examine what it is meant by submission, submission is for slaves or subjects not for a partner. Google the meaning of ‘submission'.



Kneeling down does not make sense and it does not make a woman, a good woman or wife. Culture or not, why would any balanced human want his/her mate to kneel down for him or her? Are you an idol? Perhaps you could also ask your mate to feed you palm oil with ekuru?

We are partners not junior and senior. We can leave the kneeling down part for elder ones because of age and sensibility even though it has not been proven that it makes the doer is respectful/more respectful. Furthermore, culture is dynamic, I bet the first Yoruba people would have found kneeling as a sign of respect as absurd. I can also bet that the things Yorubas did 200 years ago were not done 500 years ago.


There are so many grounds for divorce nowadays and you cannot blame women alone. Men are not infallible. You bleed too.



Haneefahrn, please don't be intimidated.

Moreoffaith:


So AlQuran and Hadith says when you are submissive and do what pleases ur husband you are a slave

Ask yourself when you were young, whats the percentage of divorce then and now..

Anifat please respect your culture and see where it takes you to.

So many misogynists in this thread. Not surprising. Religion is a curse to this world.

APCmyheart:



How about in case where your parent ask you to come over and your hubby decline saying not today?

they you stay.you guys are married there has to be an understanding and agreement for peace to reighn.thanks

Sterope:
I know that God asked us to submit to him but I have never come across hat verse where God talked about submission to humans. Can you please show me anywhere in the Quran God asked another human to submit to another human beings?

You also need to examine what it is meant by submission, submission is for slaves or subjects not for a partner. Google the meaning of ‘submission'.



Kneeling down does not make sense and it does not make a woman, a good woman or wife. Culture or not, why would any balanced human want his/her mate to kneel down for him or her? Are you an idol? Perhaps you could also ask your mate to feed you palm oil with ekuru?

We are partners not junior and senior. We can leave the kneeling down part for elder ones because of age and sensibility even though it has not been proven that it makes the doer is respectful/more respectful. Furthermore, culture is dynamic, I bet the first Yoruba people would have found kneeling as a sign of respect as absurd. I can also bet that the things Yorubas did 200 years ago were not done 500 years ago.


There are so many grounds for divorce nowadays and you cannot blame women alone. Men are not infallible. You bleed too.



Haneefahrn, please don't be intimidated.

My dear sister, it is not written anywhere in the Quran or hadith that a wife should be a slave to her husband, but it is not written anywhere that kneeling down to serve your husband is a sign of slavery, is it??

This is Africa, Nigeria and this man in question is a Yoruba man(Omo kaaro oojire) As an African man and a Yoruba man we have ways in which we show respect to ourselves which is kneeling down and prostrating ..

Then when a woman misbehave in marriage, her parent will be the one to blame for her misconduct..They will say she doesn't have home training ( koni eko ile) but now they will say she refuse to yield to home training (Akoogba londa laamu)

Pls ask why the grooms family in Yoruba land ask the bride to prostrate before given their daughter...

Why do our parents marriage last 50 years and above??

We have a very good culture which we need to value, respect and maintain.

Almighty God will surely guide us to the right path and give us more knowledge and understanding about life..

Have a great night and forgive me if I sound somehow rude in my comment.

prinsam30:
9ce one, Culture is the key

culture oshiii....God purnish culture

angelanto8:
they you stay.you guys are married there has to be an understanding and agreement for peace to reighn.thanks

Good point, You gonna be a good wife if you represent your comment..

I wish you all the best..

You still haven't answered any of my questions. All that African and Yoruba talk, is not my thing. There is nothing special about it, unless you can prove that it makes us more or less of a human. I am not buying g a Culture that subjugates another human being. Culture is dynamic, like it or not. Still, it will not change that lil detail about culture.



If kneeling down is a sign of respect to a husband, why can't the husband postrate to the wife too because it is a sign respect, isn't it sir? It sha kuku not a sign of slavery, abi. I also heard that respect is reciprocal and you can't definitely tell me someone deserves more respect than another person in a given relationship well other than parent - child relationship or senior-junior relationship (which it is even subject to debate)?





Our grandparents marriages might have lasted more it was at the expense of lot of things. If you do pay attention, i their marriages did not last because of kneeling down. We have established that kneeling down doesn't mean shit. It is a formality women like me do not care about. And yes, there were great/ grandmothers who were annoying and rude and they still stayed in their marriages. Why don't you tell me why their marriages lasted?

Moreoffaith:



My dear sister, it is not written anywhere in the Quran or hadith that a wife should be a slave to her husband, but it is not written anywhere that kneeling down to serve your husband is a sign of slavery, is it??

This is Africa, Nigeria and this man in question is a Yoruba man(Omo kaaro oojire) As an African man and a Yoruba man we have ways in which we show respect to ourselves which is kneeling down and prostrating ..

Then when a woman misbehave in marriage, her parent will be the one to blame for her misconduct..They will say she doesn't have home training ( koni eko ile) but now they will say she refuse to yield to home training (Akoogba londa laamu)

Pls ask why the grooms family in Yoruba land ask the bride to prostrate before given their daughter...

Why do our parents marriage last 50 years and above??

We have a very good culture which we need to value, respect and maintain.

Almighty God will surely guide us to the right path and give us more knowledge and understanding about life..

Have a great night and forgive me if I sound somehow rude in my comment.

Moreoffaith:



My dear sister, it is not written anywhere in the Quran or hadith that a wife should be a slave to her husband, but it is not written anywhere that kneeling down to serve your husband is a sign of slavery, is it??

This is Africa, Nigeria and this man in question is a Yoruba man(Omo kaaro oojire) As an African man and a Yoruba man we have ways in which we show respect to ourselves which is kneeling down and prostrating ..

Then when a woman misbehave in marriage, her parent will be the one to blame for her misconduct..They will say she doesn't have home training ( koni eko ile) but now they will say she refuse to yield to home training (Akoogba londa laamu)

Pls ask why the grooms family in Yoruba land ask the bride to prostrate before given their daughter...

Why do our parents marriage last 50 years and above??

We have a very good culture which we need to value, respect and maintain.

Almighty God will surely guide us to the right path and give us more knowledge and understanding about life..

Have a great night and forgive me if I sound somehow rude in my comment.

And you forget there are Muslims who believe you shouldn't even prostrate or kneel for your parents talk more a spouse.

Not everyone carries culture on their heads, and we mostly do that when it suits us, that applies to religion too, people forget their responsibilities and start quoting Quran and Hadith when it suits their desires.

I don't pray to marry a man that will see it as a duty for me to kneel down to serve him food, and I won't 'bi idhni llah', I'll rather be with someone that sees me as a wife,lover, friend, partner and not a mat to step on and a puppet to bend to his every desires.


Many of those marriages we paint so golden actually weren't so rosy, but the Societal influence and lack of a support system cos women were largely dependent on their husbands ensured that endurance of every bad behaviour, but now women are more empowered so will naturally take less of what their mother's and great-mothers endured just to stay married.

Sterope:
I know that God asked us to submit to him but I have never come across hat verse where God talked about submission to humans. Can you please show me anywhere in the Quran God asked another human to submit to another human beings?

You also need to examine what it is meant by submission, submission is for slaves or subjects not for a partner. Google the meaning of ‘submission'.



Kneeling down does not make sense and it does not make a woman, a good woman or wife. Culture or not, why would any balanced human want his/her mate to kneel down for him or her? Are you an idol? Perhaps you could also ask your mate to feed you palm oil with ekuru?

We are partners not junior and senior. We can leave the kneeling down part for elder ones because of age and sensibility even though it has not been proven that it makes the doer is respectful/more respectful. Furthermore, culture is dynamic, I bet the first Yoruba people would have found kneeling as a sign of respect as absurd. I can also bet that the things Yorubas did 200 years ago were not done 500 years ago.


There are so many grounds for divorce nowadays and you cannot blame women alone. Men are not infallible. You bleed too.



Haneefahrn, please don't be intimidated.

I'm not, can't be
Thanks

Rozaybb:
culture oshiii....God purnish culture

babe why ur blood dey hot early this morning na

Sterope:
I know that God asked us to submit to him but I have never come across hat verse where God talked about submission to humans. Can you please show me anywhere in the Quran God asked another human to submit to another human beings?

You also need to examine what it is meant by submission, submission is for slaves or subjects not for a partner. Google the meaning of ‘submission'.



Kneeling down does not make sense and it does not make a woman, a good woman or wife. Culture or not, why would any balanced human want his/her mate to kneel down for him or her? Are you an idol? Perhaps you could also ask your mate to feed you palm oil with ekuru?

We are partners not junior and senior. We can leave the kneeling down part for elder ones because of age and sensibility even though it has not been proven that it makes the doer is respectful/more respectful.

Furthermore, culture is dynamic, I bet the first Yoruba people would have found kneeling as a sign of respect as absurd. I can also bet that the things Yorubas did 200 years ago were not done 500 years ago.

The bolded is my grouse with most people who stick to culture when it favours them. Nothing is stagnant ahen it comes to human interactions and way of life. Culture is transient and is always subject to change. Lanuage which is the more pronounced part of culture is even changing daily let alone others tgat are just peripheral aspects of it. Yeah, we should hold onto the good aspects of it but there are some that are just trivial and should not be an obligatory part of people's life .

mikolo80:



Right out the gate
Dependency theory
My dear theyCHOSE e to marry cheats and beaters
Till today they still have terrible CHOICE in men
Must have to do with strong
genesNobody wants to get married to a wimp
Makes the whole species unsafe




Rat poison in his meals would have sorted this out but the women CHOSE to allow their daughters rape to go unanswered




We all have a CHOICE to make
Na dem CHOOSE to marry beasts (strong genes)



Even a slave has CHOICE
not to marry the bad guys but till tmrw they will CHOOSE to marry animals over good guys so they should carry their cross


you are treated with the respect you accord yourself

16-Year-Old Mother Joins Prostitution In Bauchi After Forced Marriage
https://www.nairaland.com/3820292/16-year-old-mother-joins-prostitution-bauchi

badaoyeyemi:
.Cant Even Do Dat 4 Popsy Talkless Of Husband..But Dat Doesnt Mean I Dont Respect Him

LoL. Just going through your post and I saw this. I trust NLders on this one.

Ziinno:
My boyfriend cooks for me and sometimes does my laundry. If the day comes when such a man require of me to kneel when I serve his meal, I would not give it a a second thought before saying yes.

Quite often, such a man will not want to disturb the status quo when you are playing your respective roles in private.
It's in public that faces are put on, just to avoid unnecessary criticisms & attacks from narrow-minded people.
**winks**

obadizena:



Quite often, such a man will not want to disturb the status quo when you are playing your respective roles in private.
It's in public that faces are put on, just to avoid unnecessary criticisms & attacks from narrow-minded people.
**winks**

Once I was at his apartment, he's in the kitchen cooking(I can cook but the man loves to cook)...his sister walks into the house unexpectedly and that was the end of his cooking. LMAO.

Thankfully, I got the subtle message and played along. Society and their conventions eh?

Ziinno:


Once I was at his apartment, he's in the kitchen cooking(I can cook but the man loves to cook)...his sister walks into the house unexpectedly and that was the end of his cooking. LMAO.

Thankfully, I got the subtle message and played along. Society and their conventions eh?

A male-dominated society, for that matter!!!

"The truth is that male religious leaders have had - & still have - an option to interpret holy teachings either to exalt or subjugate women. They have, for their own selfish ends, overwhelmingly chose the latter. Their continuing choice provides the foundation or justification for much of the pervasive persecution & abuse of women throughout the world. " --- Jimmy Carter.