Someone said that in Nigeria, divorce is lowest among the Igbos. Some people came up with high bride price as the reason. But that is not the reason.

I have attended weddings of different ethnic groups that cost 20 million naira and above. That did not stop some of those marriages from crashing within 2 years.

The bride price or the amount spent during marriage rites has nothing to do with how long a marriage lasts.

In Igboland, before Christianity, marriage was sacred but divorce was not difficult. Women could pack their things and go home anytime they could no longer bear to stay in the marriage; and it was not hard for them to remarry, especially if they had born children and were still within the childbearing age. Children were very important then.

The man would come with his family members to beg for the woman to return. But if the matter could not be settled, the marriage was dissolved. Marriage was not a do-or-die affair.

Divorce was nothing shameful. Remarrying was not difficult for women too, unlike now. I have some instances of age-mates of my grandmothers who married two or three different men because they were not happy with their initial husbands, especially if the men were lazy. In Chinua Achebe’s Things Fall Apart, how did Ekwefi divorce her husband and become Okonkwo’s wife? On her way to the stream one day, she branched into Okonkwo’s house and that was the end of the first marriage. Her father would return her bride price to her husband, while Okonkwo would pay her bride price and become her new husband. End of story. She had initially wanted to marry Okonkwo but Okonkwo was too poor to marry her, so she married a man she did not like, only to leave him for Okonkwo when Okonkwo had become a man of repute.

So what is the reason for today’s low divorce rate among the Igbos – home or abroad? Here is it: Christianity.

Divorce is frowned at by the church and Igbos take their membership of the church seriously. Igbos are constantly told that God hates divorce. Divorce is seen as a thing of shame. If you divorce, you lose some rights in the Anglican and Catholic churches which Igbos belong to in large numbers. You can’t wed a second time in the Church. You can’t be a knight or lady. You can’t belong to the Parish Church Council. You can’t be a Synod delegate. You can’t be a church warden. You can’t lead some societies in the church. When you die, your corpse cannot be brought into the church for funeral service; the service has to be done in your premises, etc. For a divorced woman, the same Christianity makes it difficult to find a husband, because the Bible says that he who marries a divorced woman is a sinner.

That is why Igbo couples endure a lot. It is only in very serious cases that some people consider divorce an option.

It is for the same Christian influence that Igbos may be the ethnic group with the least polygamous marriages now. The church rejects polygamy and most Igbos try to comply with this, unlike in the past when polygamy was a sign of wealth and power.

Because of the same Christian influence, it is common today to see Igbo couples who don’t have children or those with only female children still living together without the man getting a second wife or having a secret woman somewhere having children for him.

In the past, adoption was seen as taboo in Igboland, but not anymore. Many who have such challenges today resort to adoption, because the church or society will not endorse their divorcing their wife or having a second wife because of childlessness or not having a male child.

This is one of the reasons baby factories are popular in Igboland. Couples who don’t have children or who don’t have a male child would secretly go to procure a baby from these sources and pass such off as their natural children. The mothers of these babies are usually young girls who got pregnant mistakenly, and because of the same Christianity, their parents see them as a disgrace. So to avoid being treated like lepers, they will hide their pregnancy, run to a baby factory and be sheltered until they deliver. The baby (which they would have thrown away) would be taken from them, with some money paid to them. They go away still looking like any other girl that has not got pregnant before wedlock. Their baby is sold to a childless couple that desperately needs a child and has the money to raise the child as their own. The girl will never know the couple or have any link with them.

The girl continues to be seen as a good Christian girl who sings heavenly songs in the choir or church band or as the same sister that brings down the angels with her prayers. The couple become happy. They continue to be seen as good Christian couple blessed finally with a child after 20 years of “waiting upon the Lord.” The man has no reason to divorce the wife or have children by a secret woman. The baby factory man or woman smiles to the bank, feeling convinced that he/she is saving children that would have been thrown away and also making childless couples happy. Silence becomes the word everywhere and all is happy. The cycle continues. When you burst one baby factory somewhere, another springs up somewhere.

So if you want to know why Igbos have low divorce rates or low secret wife rates or low baby mama rates, look no further. It is the Church. The fear of the Church is the beginning of wisdom in Igboland!


http://etimes.com.ng/is-divorce-rate-lowest-among-the-igbos-if-so-why/

I guess their women are less promiscuous

emeijeh:
I guess their women are less promiscuous

Another salient point you raised. And also they frown at having child outside wedlock ...These i think are the causes

KissChrixx:
So, what are you driving at?

Nothing. Just stating the obvious

Very sensible write up,the igbos respect d church opinion alot especially d Catholic's n wld rather move away from dia family wen d marriage x not working dan 2get divorced per say..... Hopefully in years 2come dey might see reason 2get back 2geda,by den dey must v learnt dia lessons....

Good writeup,am proud to rep Igbo.

proudly igbo

Proudly IGBO

That's because IBO's have rules and they stick to it!

Igbos are tribalists.

I See! Dats Why Ashawo Plenty For Dat Side.. Baby Factory Biz Is Better Dan Baby Mama Abi?

simplyakinz:
I See! Dats Why Ashawo Plenty For Dat Side.. Baby Factory Biz Is Better Dan Baby Mama Abi?

yes