Hmmmm, this is a heavy matter. I for one is against adultery vehemently. And would not consider dating a married man while single let alone when I get married sleep outside my matrimonial home.

O.p you have already committed the act but a wise man once said "lies are heavy and a burden to carry but a tear drop of truth heals the soul for eternity.

You must confess to him, he is your husband and the one you vowed for life and till death. Confessing to God and to him will set you free.

No matter how you hide it, the truth shall come out one day. Will he be happy that you made him a fool and kept a lie for so long? It will extend matters and make forgiving hard for him.

The truth always hurt, tell him, no matter how you try to salvage your mistake it won't stop it from hurting still. If you're truly repentant tell him so he can forgive you. He will get mad for sure but that's when you'd do all you can to earn his trust back.

Tell the truth and set yourself free. You're living in bondage, set yourself free. It's hard, I know, just try.

Let me ask you a question, don't you think it would be disastrous if he finds out you cheated on him from another source? And you sleeps with him on the same bed, make love to him, feeds him, kiss and touches him,, do you think withholding the truth is the right thing to do?

You can hide but you can't run. Tell him the truth.

[b][/b]

istoctober:


l feel has forgiven me, but l have not forgiven myself. l have changed from such life ever since then.

You answered the first two, and avoided the last question.

That's you knowing what you should do but battling with your conscience.

Who can condemn who God has forgiven? While you flogging yourself, God is saying 'I love you and I will not remember your past iniquities'.

You realised your wrong, asked God for forgiveness and repented. Now you have to forgive yourself and let go. God has not condemned you so free yourself from the cage you have put yourself.

If you say you want to confess then also prepare yourself for the storm that will follow.

As for your husband, what's up with all these mental fuckery? Are you acting in any way that's making him suspect you?

Hmmm
Op if you want to loose your marriage tell him
If he do not divorce you he will certainly change his attitude towards you that you are going to regret why you ever tell him the truth and it may lead to low self-esteem on your part
But please you need to answer the question why did you cheat on your husband?
even though your act of cheating isn't justifiable

First and foremost l must say you are a very good Christian with the kind of remorse you feel for your sin.

It was only Jesus that forgave that adulterous woman, Apostle Paul and your pastors won't even see anything wrong in your husband sending you out. So please stop telling them about it.

You just do yourself and your husband a very good favor by making a resolution to never fall into adultery again, you have suffered enough punishment for your sin already, don't impose more punishment on yourself by telling him about it.

Stop thinking about suicide, that will be your greatest mistake.

We are all flawed, me, your husband, the pastors and every nairalander and Seun too.

Try and gear up, listen to messages, listen to radio, watch movies, chat with friends and enjoy life.

Most of all be happy.

istoctober:


l lost my three months preggy cos of my depreesion in Jan, 2016. Ever since, l have not been myself. l keep seeing myself as not worth living.
Each time l look at him, l have this guilty conscience that l have disappointed God and my parents. I cry in my lonely hours and it has made me to stay calm even in my right at home, l felt that l deserve everything that is happening to me.

You need to see a psychiatrist for some happy pills.

Your case is more than the cheating you did. You may truly be clinically depressed and may need help.

Even if your husband forgives you, the feelings may not go. Even if he sends you packing and divorces you, the feelings may still not go.

I know your fear is that of the native Dr. Nigerians fear our deities than even God, and would rather swear by the Holy Bible or the Noble Quran than Sango or Amadioha.

Koolmak:
First and foremost l must say you are a very good Christian with the kind of remorse you feel for your sin.

It was only Jesus that forgave that adulterous woman, Apostle Paul and your pastors won't even see anything wrong in your husband sending you out. So please stop telling them about it.

You just do yourself and your husband a very good favor by making a resolution to never fall into adultery again, you have suffered enough punishment for your sin already, don't impose more punishment on yourself by telling him about it.

Stop thinking about suicide, that will be your greatest mistake.

We are all flawed, me, your husband, the pastors and every nairalander and Seun too.

Try and gear up, listen to messages, listen to radio, watch movies, chat with friends and enjoy life.

Most of all be happy.

it was with a pastor in one of the pentecostal churches and he is still living in the sin of adultery. l still hate myself and curse that day for the act l committed.
Thx for your words, it means alot to me now.

eyinjuege:


You need to see a psychiatrist for some happy pills.

Your case is more than the cheating you did. You may truly be clinically depressed and may need help.

Even if your husband forgives you, the feelings may not go. Even if he sends you packing and divorces you, the feelings may still not go.

I know your fear is that of the native Dr. Nigerians fear our deities than even God, and would rather swear by the Holy Bible or the Noble Quran than Sango or Amadioha.

Am scared of my parents cos l know God has forgiven me and l know when he will ask me about it, that l will confess and that is my fear. My husband with parents will be disappointed with me forever cos they raised me well.

Ishilove:
[b][/b]
You answered the first two, and avoided the last question.

That's you knowing what you should do but battling with your conscience.

Who can condemn who God has forgiven? While you flogging yourself, God is saying 'I love you and I will not remember your past iniquities'.

You realised your wrong, asked God for forgiveness and repented. Now you have to forgive yourself and let go. God has not condemned you so free yourself from the cage you have put yourself.

If you say you want to confess then also prepare yourself for the storm that will follow.

As for your husband, what's up with all these mental fuckery? Are you acting in any way that's making him suspect you?

No! l am not portraying any attitude to signify such life is going on.

Confess to him and give him the chance to give the greatest gift two people in love can give each other: Forgiveness.

Have u ever come across the passage below?

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, a broken and contrite heart, oh God thou will not despise.

In my own view, certain restitution like this can cause greater damage than the one on ground. If restitution will destroy the parties involved, i think it's better settled between the offender and God. And you also did right by confessing to a Pastor. This, to me, will suffice if you have genuinely repented.

istoctober:


it was with a pastor in one of the pentecostal churches and he is still living in the sin of adultery. l still hate myself and curse that day for the act l committed.
Thx for your words, it means alot to me now.

Fear pastors! I repeat, fear pastors.

obyrich:
Fear pastors! I repeat, fear pastors.

Most of those privately own churches are like that.

istoctober:
l had to open this account to tell this story and l know that l will be bashed for this but l really need to get it off my chest.
it was in 2014, that l cheated on him and since then, l have not been myself. l have confessed to Pastors but l can't forget it and my mind keep telling me that God has forgotten about me cos whenever l pray, l find it difficult to concentrate and that's why l want to confess to him.
l know he will send me packing because he said something like that to me and the fear is what is keeping me from confessing to him. l don't want to be disgraced out of my home cos my husband will definitely do it.
l can't blame him for my shortcomings but myself for allowing devil into my home.
l really need your advice for help.... You can curse me but l deserve it for being a loose woman but l seriously need help cos depression wants to take over my life that l think of suicide to escape shame and mockery from people in case he finds out.

Madam, you have asked for God forgiveness. That is good.
God has forgiven you. As you have stopped the sinful way.

You dont need to tell your husband. Dont destroy your marriage.

But where is lalasticlala sef

Istoctober,

I am so sorry about the torment you are going through.

There is no perfect person. you have already judged yourself so I can never judge you.

I want you to know that God has forgiven you.

you have confessed to Him and he has forgiven you. NOW FORGIVE YOURSELF. I perceive you never went back again. FORGIVE YOURSELF SISTER. Release yourself from this bondage of guilt because Christ has forgiven you.

Now let's look at it scripturally:
When Jesus saw the adulterous woman, He asked her to go and sin no more. the ultimate confession was to him, he did not require her to go and confess elsewhere.
When Jesus went to the house of Zaccheus, he did not ask Zaccheus to restitute. Zaccheus decided that on his own.

If you decide to confess, just know it is your decision. God is not requiring that from you.

Dear Jesus, I commit this sister into your hands. Thank you for forgiving her as she has asked. Please envelop her with your peace, and break the hold of torment over her life. Make her life beautiful again. Strengthen her marriage. In Jesus Name.

Dnt confess to him , try and forgive urself ,because God has forgive you . most men would cheat and won't evn confess or feel any remorse yet they still enjoy their marriage . ur life will become miserable if u confess.

@istoctober the only way you can get a genuine and real advice on what to do and how to go about this issue is to tell the real story of what happened.

It all depends on how and why you were lured to the pastor. Infact.....must tell us how it happened.

I can assure you one thing and you are feeling it.......your husband is about to know. Woe betide you....your husband knows from another source. That's the end...I repeat that's the end.

I don't even know how to go about advicing you, because your story is incomplete.

lurther:
@istoctober the only way you can get a genuine and real advice on what to do and how to go about this issue is to tell the real story of what happened.

It all depends on how and why you were lured to the pastor. Infact.....must tell us how it happened.

I can assure you one thing and you are feeling it.......your husband is about to know. Woe betide you....your husband knows from another source. That's the end...I repeat that's the end.

I don't even know how to go about advicing you, because your story is incomplete.

your post is hilarious. Reminds me of Patience Ozokwor acting as the evil mother in law. lol

Okay BRB istoctober

Do you want me to post here and talk to you?

Hi katyamizotta

Onegai:
Okay BRB istoctober
Do you want me to post here and talk to you?
Hi katyamizotta

My darling Onegai. Longest time. Its being over a year. How is your little one?

istoctober:


it was with a pastor in one of the pentecostal churches and he is still living in the sin of adultery. l still hate myself and curse that day for the act l committed.
Thx for your words, it means alot to me now.

Good evening sist.

I read through all your post, can't believe we have such women in our present society, yes nobody is above mistake and you shouldn't kill your self for that, nobody is perfect. but make sure you don't confess to you husband, he might no take you back, men hate it when their wife cheats on them.

Just forget things like that happened.

obyrich:
Fear pastors! I repeat, fear pastors.

they are scammers.

how the op fell for his sweet talk still baffles me, cous the op is of good character..

I wish people read this and learn, your pastor is not a God, he his human like you.. I don't give a dam about any pastor, if you cross my lay I go show you.

I just gat this philosophy in life, "Do good" and everything Good will come your way.. so I don't buy into what most paster are saying.

istoctober:


it was with a pastor in one of the pentecostal churches and he is still living in the sin of adultery. l still hate myself and curse that day for the act l committed.
Thx for your words, it means alot to me now.

The same man will go to the altar and preach. No wonder we have so many powerless Christians now. It's because the spirit of God is no longer in many churches for they have been polluted from the altar

Asking God for forgiveness makes lots of sense but telling us that you have confessed to God lacks wisdom, He saw everything, in fact, He was there when you committed the sin. Nothing is hidden from our God.

The Bible says if you cover your sin, you will not prosper.

Ishilove:

The same man will go to the altar and preach. No wonder we have so many powerless Christians now. It's because the spirit of God is no longer in many churches for they have been polluted from the altar

May God help us all.
That was how our married area Pastor impregnated our choir mistress. The same man of God left the wife and ran away with the choir mistress.

Ishilove:

Poster follow this advice.

God answers prayers, I'm a living proof.

Have you been cheating?

Agbaletu:

May God help us all.
That was how our married area Pastor impregnated our choir mistress. The same man of God left the wife and ran away with the choir mistress.

The one in my church impregnated a chorister and it affected his marriage. As I speak to you his ministry has taken a nose dive and he is no longer in the church. I hear he has started a prayer group but I did not dig deeper because I can't be part of such.

The one that took over from him is even worse. He chases anything in skirt and even my mum warned me to avoid him. He too has been redeployed.

The church as we know it today is filled with all manner of abominations and i'm not surprised. We are at the end times and it's only going to get worse

Ishilove:

The one in my church impregnated a chorister and it affected his marriage. As I speak to you his ministry has taken a nose dive and he is no longer in the church. I hear he has started a prayer group but I did not dig deeper because I can't be part of such.

The one that took over from him is even worse. He chases anything in skirt and even my mum warned me to avoid him. He too has been redeployed.

The church as we know it today is filled with all manner of abominations and i'm not surprised. We are at the end times and it's only going to get worse

Oh my God! We are surely at the end time.

Agbaletu:

Oh my God! We are surely at the end time.

My brother, they will come and preach but behind closed doors they are committing. God is surely a merciful God

gazilion:


Have you been cheating?

Ummm...

istoctober:


l feel has forgiven me, but l have not forgiven myself. l have changed from such life ever since then.

From all indications, you are not as bad as you feel. Since you have a living conscience. (Except the fear is borne out of Native doctors' power to find your sins out).

A penitent and contrite heart, the Lord will not despise. Ps. 51:17

If the Lord would not despise your genuine (I guess) repentance and remorse, why would you?


Even your husband is not free from sin (in all subtle form), all carry same weight before God.

Free your self. You need to be more concerned if you haven't genuinely and sincerely stopped that habit but if you have, then, if any man be in Christ, old things have passed away, behold all are become new.
2 Corinthians 5:17.

Stop living in the past!