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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. (1716 Views)
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Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by DebbySun(f): 7:12pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Whilst I aim to appear more materialistic in this post just for giggles, I endeavour to convince women to see how dating a financially unstable man can be detrimental. when it comes to choosing a long-term partner, it seems like a taboo for a woman to want to practice hypergamy let alone write about it. Social media is full of various memes discouraging women from dating up, and shaming them into settling for guys who are always out of pocket. The logic pushed is that broke guys are “nice”, and that should take priority in a woman’s decision for a partner. What is even more problematic are the pornverty stories of women dedicating their time and resources to support broke guys and reaping the rewards in later years. The reasons for these stories are simply to romanticise the idea of poverty whilst ignoring the practical reasons why dating a broke man can be toxic for a woman. Age and Relationship Goals Unless you are dating for the sake of dating and your goals are not to be in a long-term commitment that will lead to building a family, you can go ahead and enjoy your Netflix and chill relationship dynamic. For the rest of us, refusing to date a man who isn’t financial stable doesn’t necessarily make us materialistic, it makes us practical. Past the age of 21, the aim should be to choose a partner who can be a competent husband and father in the near future (I won’t wish a broke guy on any woman at any age). Fulfilling both of these roles require financial responsibilities and having swag or being “nice” isn’t going to put a roof over your head or that of your progeny. Even for a financial “independent” woman, aiming to marry “up” is a necessity because marriage and parenthood can present barriers that will lower your personal income. Research has shown that married women earn less and those with children earn even lower. They are assumed to be less career focused, and therefore unlikely to be hired for top earning jobs or put up for promotions. If marriage is financially detrimental to a woman’s personal income, it only makes sense that she aims to balance this out by dating and marrying someone of better financial means. After all, men do not get pregnant and research has shown that, unlike women, married men earn relatively higher than their single counterparts. Additionally, marrying a financially stable man will give you the privilege of enjoying motherhood without being forced back to work 2 days after giving birth. Avoid dating broke guys and you won’t fall in love or end up marrying one. Remember that, “love is a choice” and we must choose better. Constant need to massage his ego: A man who is in a position to contribute to his partner’s life has his ego boost simply for being able to do so. Whether it is taking you out for dinner or treating you on your birthday, it makes him feel manly. Unable to do such basic manly sh*t will put a strain on your relationship because he will constantly need you to massage his ego in order not to feel emasculated.His lack of funds means that you will be footing the bills. Tip toeing in order not to bruise his ego, this will become the norm and he will feel entitled to your help. You will be manipulated to believe that, you are the source of his change, the one who makes him a better man and the reason he is working “hard” to make something not for himself but for you. He will most likely believe in traditional gender roles if only it applies to you cooking, serving, and treating him like a “king” although without a castle. It will never be about him providing for you because his definition of being a “man” is acting unnecessarily hyper-masculine in order to compensate for not doing actual manly sh*t. Netflix and Chill Your relationship will be confined to the four corners of his room or worst yet his friends’ or mamma’s house. He will seem stingy because he is always broke and his constant moaning will be the most unromantic thing ever. Your Netflix and chill dates will end with you being upset because you feel used and unappreciated, but the cycle will continue. You ain’t worth sh*t because you come cheap The problem with dating a broke guy is, you set the tone for how you will be treated in the relationship. This will be the standard you set for him to treat you, and even if his financial status were to change, you will remain his low maintenance, low standards partner. For every little effort he makes, you will be required to jump through hoops to show your appreciation; that is if he ever bothers to make the effort. He will not be inspired to do better by you because you have shown him he doesn’t have to. You have proved to him with your basic standards that his presence is all that is required in the relationship and you ain’t worth sh*t because you come cheap. Expect nothing to change. He will upgrade you Social media pornverty stories will have as believe that, if we struggle enough with a “nice” guy, we too will be rewarded. It remains, however, that, past the age of 30, a man still struggling to “make it” in his mum’s basement has little chance of actually making it. If he happens to be among the 0.01% to turn their circumstances around, the chances are he will replace you with a woman with better standards. Your presence will represent struggle because you have seen him at his lowest. You will be a constant reminder of where he was at rather than where he is in his life. He will most likely want a woman who represents his new-found financial freedom without the historical baggage of struggling together. If you are lucky enough to enjoy the rewards of being the hold me down chick, it will probably be because he feels sorry for your a*s and is only keeping you so that he doesn’t have to live with the guilt of abandoning you. In which case, you become a charity case for all your hard work. Read More Here: www.goddessesneversettle..com.ng |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Hadez(f): 7:13pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
A man who can't spend half of his salary on you, is that one a man 1 Like |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Nobody: 7:19pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Not again! Same old BS recycled! What's that? |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Nobody: 7:21pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
let me put this straight I am a broke guy. I think 70% of Nigerians are broke not because they are not trying but because the economy is not favorable. but most guys still hustle to make it in life. some even go to extreme to do so ask danny crane However many girls don't want to hustle with their bf. Now WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I WILL WANT TO KEEP TO A GIRL WHEN AND IF I MAKE IT?. cause no one stood by me when I was hustling JUST A TAUGHT 3 Likes |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by dechar(m): 7:22pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Hadez:he spends half on you,what will he spend on himself and his family, girl your mean |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by virud: 7:22pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Hadez: All your training and education was only to learn how to be a parasite? How to reap from where you didn't sow? Your own education can't fetch you money abi? Be careful before you exchange your future for a plate of rice.. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by dechar(m): 7:23pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Hadez: 1 Like |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Mhissgaga(f): 7:27pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Hadez: |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by ojun50(m): 7:27pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
2day wey be Monday again, them don pay salary oh broke guys suprise YR BROKE GIRLFRIEND DIS WEEK ND THEIR FAMILY TOO. |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Alphamale2017(m): 7:30pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
u are 1000000000% correct. we done hear infact they should even kill all the broke guys if they have the chance to , another attention seeker looking for fame. this issue has been over flogged. we done hear , next topic please 1 Like |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Nobody: 7:34pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Life is in phases and stages. A man that is broke today might not be tomorrow. As long as he has visions, give him time results will speak for itself. 1 Like |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by BornAgainMay: 7:34pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
I won't comment.. I know you're somewhere praying for broke guys to come your way but they won't 2 Likes |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by JeffreyJamez(m): 7:50pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Op just as y'all don't wanna date "broke" guys, the "rich" guys don't wanna date your parasitic asses too... they'll just shag and move on and when they're indeed ready to settle down, they know just where to look. 2 Likes |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by greenermodels: 7:57pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
greyboy5000:that is how they would be doing akwuna akwuna till age goes against them and they would start looking for any available/manageable guy.i need a helper not a parasite. 1 Like |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by bitcoinvin(m): 9:27pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
DebbySun: at op,u are a fool...My question is:Are self made as a woman?.... Go and ask Linda Ikeji,she is 40 and yet,no Husband cos she has money and no man can leave with such lady. Did u father become dangote before ur mum agreed to marry him Stop giving baseless and stupid advise to some ladies,this is the Reason while most of them turn slay queen. Marriage is about:Peace,Love and Committment. Ask Tonoto dike and others who married self made guys how e be for them. Ekwusigo m!!! |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by bitcoinvin(m): 9:30pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
This is some of the Ladies Stages in the University... Yr1, Yr2, Yr3 n final Yr.
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Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Nobody: 9:33pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
And some people actually read that epistle? All these Broke Girls shouting don't date broke boys Upandan... let me come and be going. |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Young03(m): 9:40pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Typical Nigerian girl mentality cc shinarlaura |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Young03(m): 9:41pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
MzLarem: I will buy u a nice gift on ur birthday cheers |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Networthh: 9:42pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Hadez:And what will he get in return |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Amarabae(f): 9:43pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
How many times will this issue be discussed? |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Nobody: 9:43pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Young03:It's in 22 days time... I will hold you to that |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Young03(m): 9:44pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Nobody: 9:45pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Young03:that's why we have Jumia, Konga and the likes. |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Young03(m): 9:47pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
MzLarem: iam strongly waiting for that day jumia,konga go ft deliver my package to u? |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Nobody: 9:48pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Young03:Depends on what the package is... |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Young03(m): 9:52pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
MzLarem: Do u like red colours? |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Nobody: 9:56pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Young03:Black does it better. |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Young03(m): 10:01pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
MzLarem:Expect lots of black bra's n panties from me that day |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by Nobody: 10:03pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Young03:... okay now. |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by wristbangle: 10:08pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
Hadez: A lady who expects her boyfriend to bear all her financial burdens of which her parents cannot afford, is she really worth to called an ordinary woman let alone a responsible woman? It is only in Nigeria that you will see a seriously wretched, dunce and hungry lady expecting to marry a ready-made wealthy man. It is only in Nigeria broke guys are more meaningless/useless than poultry poo. 1 Like |
Re: Avoid Dating Broke Guys And You Won’t Fall In Love Or End Up Marrying One. by firstking01(m): 10:18pm On Jun 05, 2017 |
One of those trash dumped in a recycled bin syphoned and plagiarised by a hungry blogger just to appear relevant and intelligent.... |
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