pocohantas:

If you dad put his own mother over your mother, his wife... Would you be happy? I wonder how some of you reason.
Your mum has enjoyed her life with your father, let your wife enjoy you her husband. Or does she have to wait till your son growns and the cycle continues.

Is your wife no receiving insult and to take care of you guys kids?
Nawa!

Madam, he is showing love to his mum, my mum did not come to nairaland to complain because she understood, the problem comes when my dad cannot makes decision without his mum. Since the guy make his own decisions and mum does not do it for him. So d babe should chill or move.

So you want to be the instrument of discord in a family you are about to join. You women are your own enemies, when you become older, your daughter inlaw[s] would seek all means to separate you at your old age from your son[s]-Law of retribution. I wonder why you are jealous of your about to be Mother-in-law, is she your rival? You must be wicked and selfish [ME-AND-MY-HUSBAND-ALONE SYNDROME]. WHY NOT KILL ALL HIS FAMILY MEMBERS?

frubben:


Madam, he is showing love to his mum, my mum did not come to nairaland to complain because she understood, the problem comes when my dad cannot makes decision without his mum. Since the guy make his own decisions and mum does not do it for him. So d babe should chill or move.

Go back to the first page, she said the mum makes decisions. I hope you guys won't mind your wife putting her father first too. Make we see who will remain in the marriage to fix things as a couple.

azimibraun:
Sorry ma.. You just indicted yourself and justified mothers prevailing over their children in marriage." None of my daughters will marry a Man...." that means you plan to influence who they marry becouse you feel you love them and should protect them. na just prayers, tolerance and being smart go help our daughters.

So that's all you could get from the comment? smh

Sister,i will tell you this,nothing is going to change even if you get married and this will lead to resentment even regardless how "cool" who are with it in the beginning. Yes,it is sad that he lost his Dad so early and his mother took up the responsibilities. Detaching himself from her isn't going to be easy and may get complicated in the long run.

Running out of the office just like that even when she said is not a big deal gives me a lot of concern. God forbid he has an accident or is run over racing to her aid. He needs to be calm and collected in his actions or reactions. If you are in a situation probably childbirth or more severe and his mother's own issue comes out of the blue, i really don't have the confidence that he will not bail out on you without thinking twice.

Mothers tend to smother us with love,manipulate us to do their bidding and it's choking for real a times when you just want to be alone. Am very independent soul and even Mummy's boy not even a tag i like even from a tender age till date.

Yes,she is his mother and gave birth to him but a fine line needs to be drawn for balance and privacy because even for me i find this case really weird and taking it too far.

If there's anything i have learnt from my parents' marriage,no one changes his or her mind or attitudes on any issue till they realise some truth from all the advice,their spouses or 3rd party close confidantes have been saying for long.

Think about this wisely please.

sweerychick:
Good evening viewers! i have this issue has been bothering me, and i dont know if i can cope with it anymore particularly now we are making plans to settle down after my NYSC.

My man is too attached to his mum almost like an addiction. at first i was cool with it because his dad is late and i like guys that are close to their mums, but my man own is creepy and freaking me out. he calls his mum almost every hour, morning, afternoon, evening and even midnight calls.

One day his mum complained of headache, he almost left his office just to buy his mum drugs despite his mum telling him it's not serious, when i tried confronting him about this he told me that his mum is his soul and if his mum dies he would die along with her too, with all seriousness he told me this.

I've been very uncomfortable since that statement from him and it's making me have a rethink whether i can cope with him as a spouse.. please advice me..

sweerychick:
Good evening viewers! i have this issue has been bothering me, and i dont know if i can cope with it anymore particularly now we are making plans to settle down after my NYSC.

My man is too attached to his mum almost like an addiction. at first i was cool with it because his dad is late and i like guys that are close to their mums, but my man own is creepy and freaking me out. he calls his mum almost every hour, morning, afternoon, evening and even midnight calls.

One day his mum complained of headache, he almost left his office just to buy his mum drugs despite his mum telling him it's not serious, when i tried confronting him about this he told me that his mum is his soul and if his mum dies he would die along with her too, with all seriousness he told me this.

I've been very uncomfortable since that statement from him and it's making me have a rethink whether i can cope with him as a spouse.. please advice me..

he is just a mummys boy

sweerychick:
Good evening viewers! i have this issue has been bothering me, and i dont know if i can cope with it anymore particularly now we are making plans to settle down after my NYSC.

My man is too attached to his mum almost like an addiction. at first i was cool with it because his dad is late and i like guys that are close to their mums, but my man own is creepy and freaking me out. he calls his mum almost every hour, morning, afternoon, evening and even midnight calls.

One day his mum complained of headache, he almost left his office just to buy his mum drugs despite his mum telling him it's not serious, when i tried confronting him about this he told me that his mum is his soul and if his mum dies he would die along with her too, with all seriousness he told me this.

I've been very uncomfortable since that statement from him and it's making me have a rethink whether i can cope with him as a spouse.. please advice me..

the fact that you brought this issue to social media shows that you have no chills in you at all

A son showing love and concern to his mom, and that become unfathomable tragedy to you
How would you like your son to treat you?
Mothers are very expensive, they are irreplaceable

Masquerade7:
I broke up with two ladies simply because my mum always wants to know my whereabout anytime, and they seemed not comfortable with that. I had no option but to kick their ass. They all ended up calling me mama's boy. That I should I grow. Who cares

...Thank you for giving them a chance to marry a normal man...You and your mum would have made life hell on earth for them.

..And please stay single and tied to your mum's apron strings forever,no sane lady will miss your kind....Goodluck.

sweerychick:
Good evening viewers! i have this issue has been bothering me, and i dont know if i can cope with it anymore particularly now we are making plans to settle down after my NYSC.

My man is too attached to his mum almost like an addiction. at first i was cool with it because his dad is late and i like guys that are close to their mums, but my man own is creepy and freaking me out. he calls his mum almost every hour, morning, afternoon, evening and even midnight calls.

One day his mum complained of headache, he almost left his office just to buy his mum drugs despite his mum telling him it's not serious, when i tried confronting him about this he told me that his mum is his soul and if his mum dies he would die along with her too, with all seriousness he told me this.

I've been very uncomfortable since that statement from him and it's making me have a rethink whether i can cope with him as a spouse.. please advice me..

please dear,would your wish YOUR OWN son be same to you? Your answer must fix it

thorpido:
Closeness is one thing,being a mummy's boy is another. You have to know the difference.
He can be close to his mum yet be his own man and make his own decisions.I don't think you should have a problem with that.If he's a mummy's boy however- can't make decisions without her input,allows her control him e t.c.,then you should run.

Your advice is super cool... But the run away aspect is a no...

Boys should stay off marriage abeg. If you are not above 33 and earn your own money and stay in your own home and send your parents money don't marry. Simple. It's important your mother see you as a Man getting married and have the belief you can handle your business. For the ladies stop snging my mummy... my mummy all the time when you are getting into a marriage. if you do that too much and your mother-inlaw to be sees you and get an impression that your mum has so much influence on your words and actions, she will want to ensure she protects her son from the mummy..mummy you won't stop singing about. Marriage no be for kids. When I was set to marry, my mum was already sympathising for my fiance and her mum. She knew they would be dealing with a Man who is fully in control. No time.

pocohantas:

Go back to the first page, she said the mum makes decisions. I hope you guys won't mind your wife putting her father first too. Make we see who will remain in the marriage to fix things as a couple.

I no c dat one. If she like love her father like God, so far her dad does not make decisions for us and she gives me my 3 round steady

poison her or better still send assassin to eliminate her. do it n thank me lerra

sweerychick:
Good evening viewers! i have this issue has been bothering me, and i dont know if i can cope with it anymore particularly now we are making plans to settle down after my NYSC.

My man is too attached to his mum almost like an addiction. at first i was cool with it because his dad is late and i like guys that are close to their mums, but my man own is creepy and freaking me out. he calls his mum almost every hour, morning, afternoon, evening and even midnight calls.

One day his mum complained of headache, he almost left his office just to buy his mum drugs despite his mum telling him it's not serious, when i tried confronting him about this he told me that his mum is his soul and if his mum dies he would die along with her too, with all seriousness he told me this.

I've been very uncomfortable since that statement from him and it's making me have a rethink whether i can cope with him as a spouse.. please advice me..

I am glad he made that statement that he can't so without his mum... that is final I I believe you can read it carefully. Be informed that his mum will contribute significantly to decision you make in your home.. thank God he is not deceptive. He has shown you the kind of person he is. whether addicted or mummy's boy, his mum will inputs will matter in decision you make.

what is important now is for you to understand what matters to you. Now it is a thing of opportunity cost. of he possesses what you can't afford to miss in a man, go ahead and hope for the best in the relationship. But if your complain is what matters to you, then back out period! after all you are not an tree.

this trait is most common in last born simply because they it is believed that mothers devote much time to care for them than any other children. Hence, cordial relationship is built.

sweerychick:
All those asking whether he makes his own decisions? Well he consults his mum most times before his decision.. Though i dont confront him abt that.. My only concern is that his statement abt him dying along with his mum..

I must say, you have a loving and caring husband to be and my advice is this if you love him too, try all possible strategies to win and have that his mother in ur palm, let the mother talk about you every minute and everywhere she is. by the time her mum start referring him to you or tells him that your choice is her choice and stand, then congratulations because he will henceforth see you as her mother.

sweerychick:
All those asking whether he makes his own decisions? Well he consults his mum most times before his decision.. Though i dont confront him abt that.. My only concern is that his statement abt him dying along with his mum..

pray the mother love you, if not you are in for a loooooooooooong thing. Relationship with guys like this doesn't last.

They give excuse like.. my mom said I should not have erection for one week sadly you will be at the receiving end

My advice for her is to kill d mum, maybe that one will make her fill confortable, idiot woman, if the woman no train the boy u go see am love? This one she is already complaining b4 marriage, I wonder wat she will do after marriage. The guy better run b4 juju go enter.
Point of correction, anything u do for ur wife, u should never tell ur mum and anything u do for ur mum, u should never tell ur wife. Let the man keep his mouth shut and stop reporting his mum case to his woman. Na because he dey report , that s y she s complain. No reporting, no complain. Shikena.

PresVA:
So that's all you could get from the comment? smh

Truth hurts. But those were your words not mine. You wish to protect your daughters but your In-laws should not protect their sons. It doesn't work that way. Folks should allow their kids run their homes and watch from the sidelines. If they need your help they will call upon you. It's a selfish world.

sweerychick:
Good evening viewers! i have this issue has been bothering me, and i dont know if i can cope with it anymore particularly now we are making plans to settle down after my NYSC.

My man is too attached to his mum almost like an addiction. at first i was cool with it because his dad is late and i like guys that are close to their mums, but my man own is creepy and freaking me out. he calls his mum almost every hour, morning, afternoon, evening and even midnight calls.

One day his mum complained of headache, he almost left his office just to buy his mum drugs despite his mum telling him it's not serious, when i tried confronting him about this he told me that his mum is his soul and if his mum dies he would die along with her too, with all seriousness he told me this.

I've been very uncomfortable since that statement from him and it's making me have a rethink whether i can cope with him as a spouse.. please advice me..

My dear is a problem. just make sure u don't live with her.

They actually want "Balance".... a man should be sensitive to know how to strike the balance so as not to send out she wrong signals.

Your wife telling you to check on her mum-in-law (ur mum) doesn't mean you should now place your mum over her suddenly coz truth is Your Mum is still your well beloved Mother but your wife is You... for she is one with you. Your Wife is your world and your all.

A balance is key. She shows she cares for your mum but that doesn't mean you should now cross the line and make your mum the topmost priority.

9free:

While my own wife begs me daily, weekly, monthly and yearly to call my mum.
Women, what do you want?

sweerychick:
Good evening viewers! i have this issue has been bothering me, and i dont know if i can cope with it anymore particularly now we are making plans to settle down after my NYSC.

My man is too attached to his mum almost like an addiction. at first i was cool with it because his dad is late and i like guys that are close to their mums, but my man own is creepy and freaking me out. he calls his mum almost every hour, morning, afternoon, evening and even midnight calls.

One day his mum complained of headache, he almost left his office just to buy his mum drugs despite his mum telling him it's not serious, when i tried confronting him about this he told me that his mum is his soul and if his mum dies he would die along with her too, with all seriousness he told me this.

I've been very uncomfortable since that statement from him and it's making me have a rethink whether i can cope with him as a spouse.. please advice me..

My dear,

If you bother to know, there is nothing cool about a man attached to his mum. When it comes down to it, such men naturally sacrifice their home for the mother. A friend just got divorced because the husband still consults his mum before making vital decisions on his marriage. By the way he is even in his mid 40s.

vickydevoka:
poison her or better still send assassin to eliminate her. do it n thank me lerra

Guees what? Some Bi-polar lady might just take you seriously and do what you just suggested. Your position for he'll eh!!! It's not a joke somethings people bring up on this forum. Most people are telling their true life stories and take our words seriously. Denounce your joke right now and make peace with God and Man. I am waiting.

vargasvictory:
Who have you been taking advises from? Did you stop for a moment and think about how traumatic it must have been for him losing his dad? And that poor woman struggled to get him where he is today. It's not like she's going to be dragging your matrimonial home with you, as long as she isn't bad to you I do not see where the problem is. If you're not comfy with it, you can go your way.

Cold Bottles of Original Origin for you.

Provided his mum does not influence him in anyway. Say like a mummy boy. If he loves her too much shldnt be an issue. Only when his mum makes decisions for him then that is where the issues lies. I had an experience with a mummy boy. We broke up in the end.

Since people are telling you the truth and you love the one's that are not real....
Cool then leave your man for that gurl that loves a man who is toooo close to his mum...

Mother's are many men's world...

His treating his mum well shows he can take good care of you... Or is the guy not doing you well??

frubben:


Madam, he is showing love to his mum, my mum did not come to nairaland to complain because she understood, the problem comes when my dad cannot makes decision without his mum. Since the guy make his own decisions and mum does not do it for him. So d babe should chill or move.

Are you minding those myopic souls called women in this age?

I can bet it that the same lady complaining will bring her mother only close to herself and her husband when she successfully gets rid of her mother - in - law.

That's how they are

ImaIma1:


Abeg jor! When my dad died, my mum didn't latch to my brothers like a leech. It is not all mums and sons that act like Siamese twins. Both can be close but not to the point of posing a threat to other loved ones like the wife.
That is exactly how a lot of mums tend to manipulate their sons and toss them around like toys.

OP be ready to be the second wife. I like a man that is his own man. Not one that needs to nurse from his mum everytime.

God bless you my sister. Immediately I saw the topic, I knew the guys of Nairaland would come hard on her.

I have brothers too and they don't exhibit these traits the poster mentioned.

sweerychick:
All those asking whether he makes his own decisions? Well he consults his mum most times before his decision.. Though i dont confront him abt that.. My only concern is that his statement abt him dying along with his mum..

U might as well let his mom know that great chemistry between them. The mom will be the solution to the problem, but letting it sink to the son's brain that he should be prepared for the inevitable. Which is death and I'm sure she wouldn't be selfish not to guide him through. @Op it's not a problem, everyone has its cross. Be thankful

GhettoG1:
Have a son first nd u gonna understand, i swear if a girl question about my mum in a slight rude way or she's asking too much then even if it's hour's to our wedding I'm calling it quit. Shikena

You have said it all sir. A lady like the op can kill her mother inlaw out of sheer jealousy

Ta. Before you call it off she'd have dumped you, so, forget it. Anyhow, grow up and be a man!

GhettoG1:
Have a son first nd u gonna understand, i swear if a girl question about my mum in a slight rude way or she's asking too much then even if it's hour's to our wedding I'm calling it quit. Shikena

Madam,try get close to d mom too kk by doing dat u might learn more things dat maks him more close to his mum n u strt doing som part of does stuffs kk, b4 u knw it u wnt av to complaints agn kk

thorpido:
Closeness is one thing,being a mummy's boy is another. You have to know the difference.
He can be close to his mum yet be his own man and make his own decisions.I don't think you should have a problem with that.If he's a mummy's boy however- can't make decisions without her input,allows her control him e t.c.,then you should run.

The only reply that makes sense.

Help him by loving his mom too, it might be the case of an absent dad or a was present and abusive dad. Better yet, it might be that of a simple closeness which is not wrong, as long as he makes you feel comfortable and loved and his mother understands your role.......you understanding hers (which from your narration is nonexistent). Make it happen.....your soon to be inlaw is suppose to be your comfort zone.......the relationship between them might be potraying what you will be getting from this guy.

If the mother dies he dies.........tell him to grow up already