Jman06:
Please anybody that wants to get married should try and do that on time o., don't deliberately waste your time only to turn around and blame the innocent society or one old mamma in your village.

Where i live now i have two single ladies in their late 30s and early 40s. These ladies have this attitude of trying to flirt with younger guys and you need to see how the guys make jest of them. It is funny when a matured lady is trying to bring herself down to the level of younger guys, i mean, it can't just work!

So, don't claim you don't want marriage now only to start embarrassing yourself with small boys tomorrow. Let's set our priorities right.

i have met one guy like that who must have spent his prime doing yahoo-yahoo, gigolo, kidnapping, or being a cult boy. The guy is 52 but single. never been married and wants to settle down at 52 with me? chukwuaju
he is expired for me and may be he might die single because according to research Men in Nigeria start dying at the age of 54. who will end up with that one?

uzobaby:
Social media is another factor. .you see older ladies telling the younger ones 'who marriage epp?even if you want to pursue your career, getting married won't stop you. ..ladies should be mindful of being misled about marriage on social media..if you must seek advice sift and sift through..

Would you blame them when the society support most men committing infidelity, abuse and among other things

asuustrike2009:

Feminism isn't as a result of ladies not getting married. It's far from it because today most feminist are what they are because of the way society treats women and that includes married women

Most "Nigerian" ladies that are feminists are usually those that have no men in their lives. Go and make your research

[b]Now this is how a post should be written - balanced; not one-sided. thank you OP, people should by this post, learn how best to write in this present world where sexism is the order of the day; this gender wanting to bash the other one thinking they know whats best about the other one. OP, frankly speaking, your head correct and your write-up is well constructed and organized. the points are valid, enough of this self delusion whereas it is all in the face while the heart is burning up with regrets, grief and fear.

Marriage is not as bad as it is painted o, your life goes on almost as much as it was when you were still single. the challenges are there but they cant be more than you can't cope with so if you're a guy and you're afraid of committing, don't let the responsibilities fool you. they are there but so also is your present single life - you are never as "free" as you might think while single. Lastly, the small-small perks wey dey marriage worth am o. coming home to meet my little Seth wifey always melts all the stress from the day. Even if me and wifey get issues, still doesn't compare to an empty house.

I was in a phone shop yesterday and this guy +-40yrs walked in with his 5 kids. FIVE DAUGHTERS MEHN... but it was beautifuuuullllll... the oldest was like six and the rest are like a year apart of each other. i can understand the stress that the man goes through with all the crying and such but the fun too is immeasurable. The family was just lovely sha. My point is guys, you might be afraid of committing but it is not as gloomy as you might all think. My 1naira.[/b]

RadicallyBlunt:
Well I don't scorn them. And I think the major cause is d economy.

Unlike before when unemployment wasn't as much as this and the cost of living wasn't expensive, marrying a wife wasn't burdensome. Now, the case is different...a graduate man underemployed for 8yrs after school would always be scared of marriage.

The ladies themselves aren't helping matters. The days of "my husband is financially responsible for all my needs including pants" is gone. Its not about eating up ur Hubby's money again but about adding up to him which they were created to do in d first place...as helpmeets

For example if you're going out together and the journey cost 10k, if he provides 7k, then you as a lady shd help with d remaining 3k. And not expecting him to always drop everything all because he's d man.

In other words, ladies too shd have a job no matter how little and the essence of the job is not to just replenish her purse while she keep saying "its his responsibility to provide not mine"...but rather to support him. The earlier a lady understands this, the better.

Well said bro!!!

The way you people carry single ladies matter n to your heads is becoming annoying .. how is it any of your bloody business?

Chaiiii! Highest level of hypocrisy should be awarded to the guys on this thread especially Op himself, like Wtf! Not one of them could see the problem coming from their side even when the Op stated few ways in which they have contributed to this 28 and single madness they yapping loudly about, I know this is another thread to bash ladies out there even though op tried to be civil by apportioning blames to both genders, they still managed to push the blame on the girls. Wooz Wooz wobi... Marriage isn't for everyone, leave us alone abi it is your singleness nii? Stop using paracetamol for our headache, we are doing fine... Eeshey, eku Ife.

That's a bloody lie from the pit of hell fire!what would you say about me, what would you say about Beyoncé and chimamanda? And they are many others, so your argument don't hold water

tosyne2much:
Most "Nigerian" ladies that are feminists are usually those that have no men in their lives. Go and make your research

tosyne2much:
Most "Nigerian" ladies that are feminists are usually those that have no men in their lives. Go and make your research

I have made my research and found it that there are many of them that were once married. It's the way most men behave that's why it keep increasing.

livinbygrace:
Most of the ladies nowadays are not marriageable.

Some guys too aren't left out.

firstking01:
3 reasons why ladies remain single for a very long time...




At their primes they were too picky/choosy



At their primes they were busy playing hard to get


At their primes they were living in the fantasy of he must be rich, tall and handsome

Funniest part of it all is, most of them end up decieving themselves into remaining single for life...i know of one like that, so, i have no pity for them

lol @ the highlighted
BTW, I totally agree with you.

emusmithy:
The Sudden Uprise Of Single Ladies Above 28: Salvaging The Situation.


SUMMARY; [/b] There are no general reasons why guys and ladies stay so late before choosing someone. Different strokes for different folks. If you have to go spiritual, it's okay. Shiloh 2017 is around the corner again. Meanwhile, make the work easy for God by applying any of these. Good morning.

There are MORE women than Men. The easiest solution is for Men to marry more that 1 wife

If everyone go for the 1-1 matching, naturally there will be some leftovers

I'M LOOKING FOR A SLIM, FAIR,RICH REPENTED PROSTITUTE TO MARRY. IF THERE'S ANY IN YOUR AREA JUST LEMME KNOW. 08077298483. I'M 34 AND IGBO. MY 2 CENTS.

You are doing yourself...you won't be here if that was what your mom said

IamKashyBaby:


Aha...well, some of us that are still single, simply bcoz we dont go down with all the BS some men will bring on the table...

Some of us are busy chasing our own dreams..dream to be a selfmade woman..

And some of us, juz dont believe in marriage as a true happiness..Marriage is NOT for everyone anyway..

asuustrike2009:

Would you blame them when the society support most men committing infidelity, abuse and among other things

But it's not enough to discourage others in getting married, that a man cheated on a lady several times should not make her talk against marriage to those that have interest in getting married. .or begin to preach feminism they don't practice. .

GoldenSpine24:
Nice one op.
I believe it's directed towards all those who desire a marital union cos its obvious from some of the comments from ladies here that being married isn't a criterion for happiness....
Anyways My 5 cents,
Reason 1....Some of them have been jilted unfairly early in life and maybe failed to grow emotionally and are still scared of losing their hearts again. However, to counter that, If you never use your heart to love, who cares when it gets broken?

Reason 2....Some make a choice. Maybe environmental background or advise suggests that when they are older than a certain age they could settle. Again, we will always learn everyday. Marriage is the only institution you receive a certificate before you begin....

Reason 3...The attitudes. Oh, lawd! the attitude of some ladies make u want to cringe!!! Some are unnecessarily rude without cause, some believe that they are divine gift to man and therefore show an extreme level of pride cos of attention left, right and centre. Some get so choosy and blind their eyes to true intentions. If a man is financially dependent, has ambitions, worthy goals but not as rich as you would want him to be....I think if a lady despises such a man,she needs to be checked again. What prevents you from also sharing your ambitions or goals with him abi you nor get? Have something worthwile your are working towards, maintain a positive attitude of where you are headed and watch how he will unleash his undending stream of love and support towards you.

Reason 4..Preconceived Ideas..When you prejudge an event or person, you will almost find nothing good. Imagine a lady telling me the other day; All men are the same no matter what. How do you prejudge a person before getting to know him..then i told her i assumed she was going to be married to a woman..When she forbade it, I asked her; Then why do you pray to God for a kind, loving and chaste mate if all of them are already the same, does it make sense? Keep an open heart dear ladies..

The truth is; if you are one who desires marriage, not getting a suitable mate at a certain time can have its emotional toll on you either male or female. It's not easy for our ladies out there. We know they go thru a lot.

If you are a lady and fall within the scope of this thread, you know if you have some homework to do. You know where the shoe free you or pain you. We are not perfect doesn't mean we would not try. Why not look for the nuggets of wisdom from all the comments and improve yourself; attitudes, goals, open hearts?

All the best to the ladies.


Peace Out

unfortunately many people won't see the most reasonable​ comment about this post.
I salute u sir!!

Quinn22:
That's a bloody lie from the pit of hell fire!what would you say about me, what would you say about Beyoncé and chimamanda? And they are many others, so your argument don't hold water

Remember I limited my assertion to "most Nigerian ladies"

Forget about Beyonce or Chimamanda. Most young Nigerian ladies you see (even on Nairaland) clamoring for gender equally are either divorced or they're not just happy about their relationship, hence, the need to unleash their frustration and paint men bad

How you ever wondered why they are usually very arrogant and spew out venom at any radius? Isn't it obvious on this thread?

Please don't be sentimental when you know the truth.

Abeg leave matter for Mathias jawe

you are wrong and he is right Sir, with all due respect. YES, see them as God fearing women not because of what they are portraying but because of the accountability you would give when you are face to face with your maker and come to think of it, was ninevah not a sinful nation yet God told jonah, i have my children there, even in their sinful state?

you can help a girl or a prostitute see herself differently by going not the way of other men but trying to correct her self image and who knows you may be saving yourself (with all these mermaids we are hearing about that abound in the society). some of these ladies are deceived by what they watched, and the manner of friends they keep, some were even forced due to the economy and some due to early rape by an adult, they all have their stories and in the right word of Gandi "leave the world a little better than the way you met it"

so Sir, try them differently like the God fearing woman you can view her to be even when she did not deserve it. Good morning

Kondomatic:
This is funny especially your point A.

Guy, it is difficult to see women differently because majority of them intentionally portray themselves the way we see them.

Literally, you're saying that when I see a woman clad in the attire of a LovePeddler I should see her like God fearing lady because there are too many unmarried women out there? "

Bleep them all.

A lady who is serious about marriage will prepare herself for marriage and will marry, likewise guys.

The rest are gifts to enjoy while waiting for the one.

Any woman who is above 28yrs and is single is to blame.

Just look at the lady in the picture posted. Is she a wife material? Capital NO.

We dont even have ladies again just hoes.

Toks2008:
Emusmithy nice post I would say but the reason why the number of unmarried ladies of 28 and above is on the increase really has nothing to do with most things you wrote up there....

It's because men now realize they don't have to be married to enjoy the benefits of a married man.

Sex is cheap and it is easy to be a baby daddy...in fact you don't have to bother about the stress of financing a family.

Our ladies are making it even easier for the guys to aboid marriage with their crazy mindset of looking for a man to dump their bukata on and guys now know this....the worst part is that most guys who are very financially stable are never committed to one lady as they indulge in point and kill or pick and drop.

Until every lady is ready to work hard as if there is no man to depend on and be ready to settle with a guy based on his tenacity to achieving success in life without looking at the present size of his pocket I guess we will forever have an increase in the number of old single ladies.

If not for my love for christ abeg wettin I Wan use marriage do when I can conviniently lay as many random beautiful ladies as I can and get one babe pregnant while I continue with my life in total freedom without the stress of any lady.

Ladies should wise up and change their mindset before it gets totally out of hand.
My humble submition.

Is sex the main benefit of marriage ?

That your point on sex does not exactly cut it,


The main reason marriage is on the decline IMO is the economic factor in Nigeria, and increasing apathy towards it by many men, and women too (unpreparedness for commitment)

Looolll...see my fellow men masturbating on this post. Nice write up, well balanced, true talk and so on and so forth.
Abeg well balanced towards where?

Well, my take is that ladies stay late to get married for the same reason men stay late to make money. Nobody better pass Na God's mercy and help.

Quinn22:
That's a bloody lie from the pit of hell fire!what would you say about me, what would you say about Beyoncé and chimamanda? And they are many others, so your argument don't hold water

sheeee you have a boyfriend? abi na fvckmate you get? nor dey lie joorh.

Lilimax:
lol @ the highlighted BTW, I totally agree with you.

And i rushed to check her pix



Btw, hope you now guilty of the aforelisted??

I really don't like these kinds of posts. Right from the title and everything written above. They always portray being single as the ultimate failure in life, forget abt the fact that u may have made numerous accomplishments in life. This is exactly why so many ppl end up settling for jst anyone who shows them the slightest interest and then they end up tolerating that other person for the rest of their life for societys sake and innocent children. Unhappy families= rotten societies and the root of all evil.
There is nothing wrong with refusing to settle for the best. If anything I admire single ladies and men who jst didnt rush into marriage for the sake of it but who waited for the right one, for as long as it took. And hey if they dont come along, then fine. But thats much better than being in an unhappy marriage and bringing innocent kids in it.
Fighting ths perception that remaining single is the ultimate failure begins with disagreeing with posts like these.

Reason is simple!
Single guys above 28 and below sef ain't employed

emusmithy:
The Sudden Uprise Of Single Ladies Above 28: Salvaging The Situation.

Hi all.

I'm not the kinda guy who narrates a menace with providing the solution.

I really don't give 'two rats' about the reasons why...

. Good morning.

@Op you are savagely wicked so on point most of those ladies you see around are not it at all,some of them dont know what marriage is all about some dont even have the attributies to remain in the so called marriage,all you see around now is so many unfurtunate lady that cant even wash their panties not to talk of taking care of a home or family,they all have these fantasies and deluded mind that there is a perfect angel out there that will understand all their pathetic behaviour and wrong doing no wonder many home wreckages these days.

i cant imagine a union between one unfurnate lady with an unfurtante guy and those poor kids that two irresponsible adult will birth.

i have one around me that is already 35 still acting like a a 15 years old,me just jejely dey look her lol

asuustrike2009:
Totally false.

Counter it and prove me wrong sir.

asodane:

Who is Mr Right abeg what traits must he possess
Thanks for answering

someone who can make her happy and she can sense that in the course of their courtship.

asodane:

Who is Mr Right abeg what traits must he possess
Thanks for answering

someone who can make her happy and she can sense that in the course of their courtship. most of the ladies who takes marriage as a priority ends in breaking up after marriage.

coolviv:
Looolll...see my fellow men masturbating on this post. Nice write up, well balanced, true talk and so on and so forth.
Abeg well balanced towards where?

Well, my take is that ladies stay late to get married for the same reason men stay late to make money. Nobody better pass Na God's mercy and help.

IamKashyBaby:


Aha...well, some of us that are still single, simply bcoz we dont go down with all the BS some men will bring on the table...

Some of us are busy chasing our own dreams..dream to be a selfmade woman..

And some of us, juz dont believe in marriage as a true happiness..Marriage is NOT for everyone anyway..

stop deluding yoursself,you can self made,succesful and also have a wonderful marriage,go ask folorunsho alakija,olushola borha,tope alabi,nike adeyemi etc stop deceiving yourself.

Kondomatic:
This is funny especially your point A.

Guy, it is difficult to see women differently because majority of them intentionally portray themselves the way we see them.

Literally, you're saying that when I see a woman clad in the attire of a LovePeddler I should see her like God fearing lady because there are too many unmarried women out there? "

Bleep them all.

A lady who is serious about marriage will prepare herself for marriage and will marry, likewise guys.

The rest are gifts to enjoy while waiting for the one.

and u see nothing wrong with bleeping women till u meet the right one?