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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? (3043 Views)
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Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by sixtus3606(m): 8:14pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
My friend Chuma(not real name) confided in me that his mum who is staying temporarily with his elder brother, asked his elder brother wife yesterday being Saturday, that; "why is nobody eating and the time is already past 12noon?). My friend's elder brother wife response was "we will eat whenever he leaves money for feeding". Does this means, even if her husband is not around for a week and her mother in-law is around, no one's gonna eat?? House, I need your opinion on this?? Royalroy |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by eyinjuege: 8:21pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
sixtus3606: I no even understand the statement she made. "We will eat whenever he leaves obey foreign feeding." What does that mean? |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by thesicilian: 8:27pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
eyinjuege:lol. You get time. |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by legacyint: 8:28pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
eyinjuege:I tire oo na only d op understand wetin he write |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by sixtus3606(m): 8:30pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
eyinjuege:MODIFIED thanks ![]() |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by makydebbie(f): 8:33pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
She should ask the husband then. 2 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by eyinjuege: 8:39pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
sixtus3606: Owww.... Now I understand. My autocorrect is even crazier than yours. That's serious then. Any reason her son didn't leave money for feeding? If there's no food in the house, mama may not be fed o Abeg, let your friend go to his brothers house with foodstuff for the whole household, and give his mum some money to hold if she wants to buy bread and eggs to get for everyone. It's not a good idea for mama alone to just eat in the house, so that's why I said everyone. If your friend is just a student, and can't afford to buy food for his brother's family and his mom, he should call his brother and use style to find out if he didn't leave any money for feeding before travellling, or mama can equally call him. 3 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by sixtus3606(m): 8:44pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
eyinjuege:thank you ma'am. I won't drive further on this. However, my friend was actually emphasizing on the sister in law utterance to his mum. but I have keyed to your point. thanks |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by eyinjuege: 8:55pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
sixtus3606: Yeah, give her the benefit of doubt. Maybe her husband truly didn't leave money for food, and she's angry she's the one having to drop the money. She may not even have money too. It's a pity mama is the one caught in the middle of their feeding money squabble. 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by fluxbush(f): 9:55pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
sixtus3606:Op,one question for you. Is she self reliant? If she isn't, please is she supposed to go and steal for mama when her own son refused to be responsible? Why aren't you asking yourself and the forum if it is right for a man to leave his wife and mother at home without feeding allowance? 11 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by Nobody: 10:15pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
That response was a very disrespectful one even if her husband failed to drop money for feeding that day. Perhaps, he didn't have or he forgot. She wasn't meant to tell her mother in-law that, and since the old woman was already hungry she could have used her money or take things on credit to pay when her husband is back then they could both talk about his living the house without dropping money. 4 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by MrBrownJay1(m): 10:40pm On Jul 09, 2017 |
The answer was as disrespectful as the husband who left without giving any money to feed his family and mother. Should the wife cook food out of thin air, or what?! 12 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by Fkforyou(m): 5:40am On Jul 10, 2017 |
Her response was disrespectful although it might be out of frustration, non the less , it was still rude of her to speak to mama that way. I hope she is the type that's willing to accept when she is wrong sha...If yes, I'm sure she would settle things with mama in due time. |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by sixtus3606(m): 7:27am On Jul 10, 2017 |
Benita27: you have said it all. well done. i learnt that as soon as she noticed my friend's presence, she hurriedly excused herself. ![]() |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by nkwuocha: 4:28pm On Jul 10, 2017 |
Benita27:It's even more disrespectful for a grown man to starve his mother. For the fact that his mother is around, he ought to have provided for her feeding. 14 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by SirVintageCock: 7:56pm On Jul 10, 2017 |
Guy should've pretended and be dropping something for feeding when mama is around. Woe betide him if mama and wife gang up against him. That is when he will know what the greatest bond ever is----two ladies that hate the same person---you don't want to be that person. 2 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by elektra(f): 8:01pm On Jul 10, 2017 |
sixtus3606: At the bolded, but the husband is around. Your friend did not find fault with his brother, who refused to provide money to feed their mum, His main concern is what sister in law said. 10 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by optional1(f): 8:06pm On Jul 10, 2017 |
it means that the wife is 100% house wife who only depends on her husband's money... It was a disrespecting respond from the wife, she should have add some little respect for mama.. And on the other hand, she might wants mama to go back to the village.. 1 Like |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by sixtus3606(m): 8:13am On Jul 11, 2017 |
elektra:Are u sure u read the article right? well, everyone is entitled to his/her own opinion. Merci |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by Nobody: 8:57am On Jul 11, 2017 |
nkwuocha:Any thing could have been the reason he failed to drop feeding money. Let's just assume things are hard for him or he forgot...it happens. If it were her mum that asked her that question, would she have tendered the same response she gave her MIL?, if I were in her shoes; I would look for what my MIL will eat, whether her son dropped money for the day or not. Then we can talk later about his attitude. Anything could have been the reason. Starving the woman was totally wrong, and responding in that manner was adding salt to injury. |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by nkwuocha: 11:42am On Jul 11, 2017 |
Benita27: If it were her mother like you said she will provide the meal. Since it's his mother, he also should do everything possible to provide. I understand her language is bad, but also talking from the experience of family issues that arise every now and then. I have a cousin whose husband hardly brings money for food. Maybe this is same case with this family. The woman may just be expressing her frustrations the wrong way. 8 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by piroux(f): 1:20pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
Honestly, i think op is focusing exclusively on what the wife said- which is not right btw- and not seeing the actions of the husband. I'v seen too many examples of men who don't leave a dime for food and yet expect their wives to miraculously feed anyone that comes around especially their relatives. In one case in particular, a man's elder brother went and took 3 pieces of meat from the woman's pot which his brother had no single kobo in. The matter degenerated so much, his brother doesn't come to his house anymore. While 2 wrongs don't make a right, he really should have dropped money for food or tell his mother he doesn't have. All these yamayama are just causes for insult ![]() 4 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by pacesetter247(f): 1:22pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
Uniquely and wonderfully female, with all the complexities implied. A woman of much strength, The heart of her husband safely trusts in her, Wisdom flows from her tongue and the sound of her voice issues succor to many souls A light to her generations and models to generations unborn Her deeds speak for her in the gates and many look up to her for safety! http://aboverubies.com.ng/2017/07/09/she-is-indeed-far-above-rubies/ 1 Like |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by EfemenaXY: 2:06pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
sixtus3606: But he wasn't away for a week was he? And even if he was, he should ensure there's enough for his family to feed during his absence. While the wife's response on the surface might sound disrespectful, she was passing on a message to her MIL in a non-confrontational manner, so that MIL will approach her son to sort out the situation he'd created. Benita27: The problem with that approach is that an irresponsible man would take that as the norm and always leave it to the wife to sort out. How can you be sure he's not done this to the wife - not once but several times? So rather than wifey fight him over the matter and look bad, she's simply decided not take the blame but pass it on to Oga. The shame should make him sit up. In marriage you start as you mean to go. 11 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by GuntersChain(m): 2:48pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
that only tells you how they have been living in the house, besides you guys should cut the lady some slack, the husband that left the house without consulting with the wife before leaving. Both are guilty, in every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. 5 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by nkwuocha: 4:39pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
sixtus3606: You're bent on nailing the daughter in law, while absolving the husband of any blame.The sole responsibilty for a man is to provide, While the wife manages the home.My wife dares not take credit from anyone without my consent. The woman Ofcourse can contribute as well, BUT it's never mandatory. Speaking as a man, I can never leave the house without asking what is to be cooked?If I don't have money for new meal, I must settle first with my wife what little thing can be prepared from what is available. The man gave the wife the effrontery to disrespect the mother by leaving without asking about the well being of his mother and kids. 17 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by fluxbush(f): 5:26pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
nkwuocha:I thought I was the only one who noticed the emphasis on the wife's action, while deliberately ignoring the husband's. Not trying to excuse the DIL's retort, but you were right when you noted that the husband gave her the effrontery to disrespect. The op and his friend are trying to demonize the frustrated wife. 7 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by Blissquare(f): 6:20pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
The question alone is wicked. The daughter in law was rude but it was called for. The mom could have asked more matured. Please what time would breakfast be ready? I am getting hungry. Some mother in laws would know their sons are irresponsible and still come visiting. Visiting to eat free food because she can blame the wife. Why did the husband not drop money? Even if the wife cooks with her money, it would backfire. The husband absconded from home because he has idiots like OP that would blackmail the rude wife. 7 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by nkwuocha: 6:21pm On Jul 11, 2017 |
fluxbush: The op is the woman's husband or BIL . ![]() The my friends elder brother's blah blah blah blah blah is just unbelievable. If it's the truth, then that family should cut down on the way they reveal family issues to close friends. A friend knowing what is happening in the other's elder brother's home is just too much gossip from grown men. 9 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by elektra(f): 7:14am On Jul 12, 2017 |
sixtus3606: Lol Yes, oga. I read your post right. Did I mention anything that was not part of your post? Where is your confusion coming from? 1 Like |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by teresafaith: 10:31am On Jul 12, 2017 |
The OP is clearly the BIL here So you are absolving your brother of his wrong doings. Why on earth will anybody in his right senses leave his home without dropping anything knowing fully well that his family needs to fed, and you are here finding fault with your SIL. You better tell your brother to man up and be RESPONSIBLE 4 Likes |
Re: Is This Right For Your Sister In-law To Say This To Your Mum? by lharstborn(m): 11:44am On Jul 12, 2017 |
piroux: That's one stewpeed and irresponsible elder brother with no atom of shame in his body. Does he not have any trace of self respect and dignity..? The idiot had the guts and effontery to go into the kitchen and even went as far as taking 3 pieces of meat?! Some peeps are just so shameless 5 Likes |
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